Strength of Heart
by Siha Krios
Summary: ME2 sequel to Eclipse of the Heart alternate story KryikxShepard Language & smut After a death relationships need to be rebuilt Collectors need to be stopped A friend finds his way and does someone a special favor that may lead to something unexpected
1. SDA

**I do not own characters or anything originating from Mass Effect or Mass Effect 2, being the sole property of Bioware. The rest is the universe of my imagination.**

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The morning had gone well. The fist jump of the day was uneventful, but no less exciting. As the day wore on toward noon, Joker made one of many more jumps with Navigator Pressly for company. It took the thrill out of his customary fantasy which he usually saved for when Commander Shepard was on deck for the jump. The familiar feeling of vertigo passed quickly as the Normandy dropped out of FTL over Alchera in the Amada system. Joker read off the stats and entered a casual conversation with Pressly about their bogus mission of seeking out geth.

The Council continued to disbelieve that the threat of the Reapers was real, even though pieces of Sovereign still littered the Citadel. The debris that wasn't stolen had been salvaged and was still being analyzed. It was possible, however unlikely given their history, that the results would provide sufficient evidence to prove that Sovereign had indeed been a Reaper. At the very least it would prove to not be geth and therefore leave the possibility open. But these issues were not currently on the minds of the first Spectre Dyad Annex.

The Council had seen fit to create the SDA, aka S-Dyannex, after the valiant efforts of Spectres Nihlus Kryik and Sonya Shepard saved the Citadel from total distruction. They were the only pair of Spectres ever assigned to work as an official team, though they did occasionally take on their own side missions. Large assignments were taken on together, especially if it pertained to the geth. Anything involving investigation into the Reaper threat was purely at their own discretion.

At that moment, however, the SDA was more interested in investigating itself. Rather, the exclusive members were investigating each other in the privacy of the captain's quarters. While Shepard maintained her own private quarters, more often she spent her nights with Kryik. Their relationship was either over looked, or accepted by most of the crew. The few who didn't approve tolerated it out of respect for the Spectres, and perhaps a healthy measure of fear. The rest were simply oblivious.

In the semi-quiet of the captain's quarters, barely audible over the low hum of the ship's engines were the passionate sounds of the tender love being made between the turian and the human bond mates. The soft whisper of movement under cottony sheets, low moans and purrs added to the music of their song.

Sonya lay comfortably in Nihlus' arms under the sheets of his bed. Their hips rocked and swayed in perfect rhythm. Her lips found his between gasps of pleasure. He cradled her beneath him as she arched into him, his desire hard and throbbing inside her. He pressed his forehead to hers and grazed his face against her cheeks, breathing her air as she breathed his. He nuzzled her soft neck and inhaled the fresh scent of her hair as it slipped through his talons. The subtle curls at the end of the strands teased her pink nipples. The blonde mound of hair that adorned her sex tickled his lower regions. She'd grown it out at his request. The sensation fascinated him as much as the fur did.

His soft purring followed on the heals of her whispering moans. His tongue found hers and held it captive in his mouth, mindful of his own teeth, in a dance as slow and tender as his passions. He could feel his ridges caressing the sensitive areas of her inner walls as she quivered beneath him. She moaned his name when she reached orgasm. The tightness and wetness of her body's vice like grip on him brought him to climax soon after with a low growl of ecstacy. He remained inside her as they rolled onto their sides, facing one another with his leg hooked over hers. They kissed and drowned in the gaze of the other as he slowly receded out of her and into himself. Her delicate fingers traced the tattoo on his face with adoration, leaving the ghost of their warmth on his carapace. He carefully followed the scars on her skin with one talon, many of which he had made himself during intimacy with her. The pad of one finger glided over a 'N' shaped scar on her chest. One of the first she'd suffered to his chest spur. One of his favorite.

The warmth of her hand found his cheek and his eyes met hers. He kissed her, deeply, as he cupped the breast nearest the scar. Gradually that hand found it's way into her hair. He was still deep inside her, no longer throbbing or quite as hard, but he wasn't ready to leave the heat of her body just yet. He pressed his hips to hers as he nuzzled their foreheads together.

"I love you." He purred. The deep tones of his voice vibrated through her.

"And I love you." She whispered back, a grin played at the corners of her mouth.

They never shared the sentiment lightly. It wasn't tacked on the the end of every good-bye, at least not verbally. The words weren't spoken every time they made love, or even every day. The gravity of their meaning never jaded.

Sonya kissed Nihlus' mouth, feeling the familiar and exotic roughness of his leathery skin, then nuzzled under his chin into the softer flesh of his throat. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close. Her body occasionally shuddered against him as a rib eased it's way out of her.

"We should check on the status." Nihlus suggested into the silken tresses of her hair.

"If there's anything of interest or importance Joker knows how to contact us." Sonya playfully argued, kissing the skin of his throat. The purr that followed put a grin on her face.

"True, but we shouldn't neglect our duties..." His words trailed off into a purr as she continued to tease her lips over his skin.

Suddenly the ship turned hard to port, flinging them in a tangle of limbs and sheets to the floor.

"What the _hell_ is Joker _doing_?" Sonya swore. Her irritation became alarm when the Emergency Alert Sirens rang out throughout the ship.

"_Damn it_!" She swore again.

They untangled themselves as quickly as possible and grabbed their armor. Whatever was going on, they were likely to need it. Their eyes locked and he pressed his forehead to hers once more in a quick gesture that said everything he carried in his heart for her before they left the cabin.


	2. Evac

"Brace for evasive maneuvers." Joker's voice came over the com shortly before the ship swerved to starboard, then port again, threatening to throw the crew to the wall each time she veered in one direction then the other. The Normandy lurched again, only this time it felt more like weapons impact. She had to get up there, now! She pulled up on the table in the mess. She had been thrown across the room. Nihlus had landed a few meters from her. He was struggling to gain balance as the ship continued it's erratic movements in attempt to avoid more fire. Down the armory hall consoles started exploding, fires were breaking out. She had to extinguish those fires, now. Several more hits rocked the ship. The crew deck was aglow with red blazing flames. Nihlus grabbed her arm and forced her to face him.

"Screw the fire! The kinetic barriers are down if we're taking this kind of damage. We have to evacuate... Now!" He ordered.

Shepard's eyes met his. He wasn't going to negotiate on this. She nodded. They didn't need a plan. She knew exactly what he would do. She only needed to fill in the gaps. Their foreheads touched before they went their own ways, briefly, as if it were a reflex.

"Everyone evacuate! Move, move, move!" Shepard shouted.

People started running to the evac shuttles. Shepard ran to the rear console to punch in the evac codes. Something behind her exploded and someone screamed. A male. People were dieing, she had to moved faster. She was finishing the prep for the distress beacon when Garrus ran up behind her.

"Shepard!" Garrus shouted to his friend over the explosions.

He hadn't know she was going to be here, it was just a feeling. He didn't have many friends on the ship. If he could only save one, well, he owed it to Nihlus ,as a fellow turian, to save Sonya.

"The distress beacon is ready for launch." She said as she turned to him, securing her helmet.

"Will the Alliance get here in time?" He asked, clearly worried they wouldn't.

The wall behind Garrus erupted into flame with another explosion. Sonya grabbed an extinguisher. 'Screw the fire,' but they needed to preserve the oxygen until everyone was off the ship. She herd the turian grunt as he braced against a rail when the ship lurched again. The console she'd just been using went fuzzy then died.

"I'm not doing this so they can find our frozen corpses." She blasted the burning exposed circuits in the wall with white foam. "I need you to help Nihlus get everyone onto the escape shuttles." She ordered as she tossed him the extinguisher.

"Joker's still in the cockpit. He won't abandon ship." Garrus blasted a blazing console with the foam. "I'm not leaving either." He looked at Sonya over his shoulder, half hoping she would let him take her place, or at least stay with her.

Blue sparks flew from disconnected wires. Sonya glanced at Garrus, then typed in a few more commands into an intact console before running over to him and taking him by the shoulder.

"Get to the damn shuttles! I'll haul Joker's crippled ass outta here." She shouted. She was serious. Seriously pissed that someone was tearing her ship, her home, apart.

"Commander?" Garrus questioned her, unwilling to simply abandon her with the ship in flames.

"Get the hell outta here, Vakarian!" She pointed toward the exit. "If you and Kryik aren't in an evac pod when the Normandy blows, I will find your remains and piss on them! GO!"

"Aye, aye." Garrus nodded before running to the shuttles, urging others along as he went. He heard the buzz of the evac shuttle doors unlocking.

"Everybody in," He shouted. "Go, go, go!" pushing each crew member in by the shoulders. Nihlus came running up to him as the last crewman to board was thrown by explosion, sending her several meters from the pod and frying off her hair. Her death was quick, but not painless. Her charred limbs and scalp added their own smoke to the air.

"Where's Shepard?" Nihlus shouted.

"She's gone after Joker!" Garrus shouted back.

"You let her go?" Nihlus barked at the turian.

"She gave me an order!" Garrus defended himself, leaning into the Spectre's face. "If you're so worried about her, why did you leave her?" His eyes glared at the superior officer.

Nihlus growled at him. He grabbed him by the shoulders and slammed him against the wall. The ship shook violently, nearly throwing them both to the ground. Nihlus dug his talons into Garrus' armor and thew him into the pod in place of the woman who'd just died. He closed the hatch as Garrus tried to shout something, in audible over the alarms and crackle of fire. Kryik hit the manual eject button.

"If anyone is listening, please, help me get her out safe." Nihlus muttered the prayer under his breath as he ran for the stairs. There was only one shuttle left and he was going to make sure Sonya was on it, with or without anyone else.

Shepard launched the distress beacon then, turning on her heels, ran for the stairs to the command deck. She shielded her face with her hands from the heat of the flames, running up the port stair case to the command deck. The doors hissed open and she stepped through the emergency barrier. It took her a few seconds to process what she saw before she could prompt her body to move. The galaxy map, the surrounding consoles... they were all destroyed. The entire over head area was missing. It looked like a gigantic, space-dwelling shark had taken a bite out of the ship. She could see the pale blue haze of the planet the Normandy was sent to scan glowing above her. Blue sparks sprayed out from destroyed consoles and exposed circuit boards. The only sound she could hear was her own breathing inside the helmet. Shepard forced herself to take the first step. Her boots had automatically engaged the zero gravity magnets that held her to the walkway. She tried to run, but the best she could manage was a stroll. She pushed past the floating, empty chairs of crew men. Wires and tubes hung like intestines from ruptured walls. A dead female ensign and... Pressly! She turned her gaze away from the floating bodies. She couldn't bring herself to look at them. She finally passed through the barrier keeping Joker from being sucked out into space.

"Mayday, mayday! This is the SSV Normandy! We've suffered heavy damage from an unknown enemy! Mayday, mayday! Do you copy?" Joker was still trying to maneuver the ship as he sent out the distress call.

"Common baby, hold together. Hold together." He pleaded with the ship.

Shepard charged over to his chair and slapped a hand on the head rest.

"We've got to get out of here!" She shouted over the sound of her home being destroyed.

She could see the determination on his face. He loved this ship as much as she did, maybe more, but it was a thing and she wasn't going to let either of them die for it.

"No! I won't abandon the Normandy!" Joker mouth was set in a thin line behind the oxygen mask. "I can still save her!"

Shepard ran to the barrier to look out side. Something exploded sending sparks flying and setting new fires. She ran back to Joker with an almost panicked sense of urgency.

"The Normandy's dead, just like us if we don't get the hell outta here." She shouted at her friend.

"No! I just have to..." Joker's eyes darted to a different area of the display. "Oh, no! They're coming around for another attack!"

Shepard turned to see the beam of yellow light that was slicing through her ship. Primal instinct was screaming at her higher processes. It was all the motivation she needed. She grabbed Joker by the arm and hoisted him onto her shoulders.

"Ow! Watch the arm!" Joker struggled to get to his feet. She was taking him whether he wanted to go or not.

Kryik was half way up the stairs when Shepard came through the barrier with Joker's arm slung over her shoulder. He moved to help her, lifting Joker over his shoulder.

"We've got to move!" He shouted.

The two of them ran to the shuttle. Joker complained about his bones cracking and shouted a stream of profanities at the attacking vessel, which they caught glimpses of through the hull. Shepard helped Joker to climb inside the last evac. pod. The yellow beam shot through the Normandy causing another explosion. What was left of the ship shuttered under their feet. Shepard lost her balance and fell against the wall. The blast burned her skin, even through the suit. She instinctively grabbed at the pain. It was definitely time to go.

"The auto release has been damaged." Nihlus shouted at her. "Some one has to stay behind... Get in the pod!"

"We're both getting in or neither of us is." Sonya shouted back at him, trying to make her way across the quaking floor to him. Nihlus caught her under one arm as another violent shudder ran through the ship.

"Commander," Joker shouted to her. She heard his desperate cry though the com in her helmet.

"Sonya," Nihlus shouted, "I'll throw you in myself, if I have to!"

"I'm not going without you!" She screamed, tears streamed down her face behind the helmet shield. "Set it to timed release, we can make it!"

"It will only stay open for a few seconds, and that's if it isn't damaged! We don't have time to argue this!" He shouted back.

"You're right, we don't!" She said.

Shepard hit the timed release and slapped the button to the escape pod's controls. She grabbed Kryik's arm as they ran for the pod a few steps away.


	3. Alliance Rescue

The evac pod's hatch snapped shut. Seconds latter the small craft was jettisoned into yellow beam sliced through the ship, causing more explosions. Pieces of the hull and other debris glanced off each other. Nihlus searched frantically for Sonya as he floated away from the carcass of the Normandy. A flash of light caught his attention as it glinted off her armor. She was floating slowly, helplessly, out into space. He heard his own frustrated growl inside his helmet. He was just as helpless to reach her.

Shepard watched the alien ship destroy what was left of the Normandy. It was like nothing she had ever seen before. It was defiantly not geth. The outter hull seemed to be made of rock. It was as if it were the spawn of a asteroid. Rage and frustration swelled within her. A few thousand meters away she could see some of the evac shuttles. Further off the first of the Alliance ships were arriving, dropping out of FTL in flickers of light. The crew would be alien ship shot one last beam, completely decimating the Normandy, then disappeared as quickly as it had come in a flash of silence. Static came over her com, then a male voice. Possibly turian if there was no interference distorting the signal.

"Shepard! Shepard do you read me?"

"I read you! C.." She was cut off by the his sentence.

"Sonya, I can't get to you. Can you see me? I'm approximately..." The come went static, then came back. "..our right."

It was Nihlus. It the blast that had knocked her from the Normandy just before the pod hatch sealed, she wasn't sure if he had made it. Now she knew. She turned her head slowly to find him. He waved his arm to make him easier to find.

"I see you." She said, waving back.

"The Normandy's gone." She said. She did her best to hold back the tears that wanted to spill over the loss of her home.

"I know." He answered, knowing how much the ship meant to her.

"The Alliance is coming. I saw them dropping out of FTL. We'll be okay." She told him.

"Good. Then I'll get the chance to yell at you for not getting in the pod." He teased.

"It's cold." She said. "My thermal collector's must be malfunctioning."

"Keep moving. Your body will help regulate your temperature." He advised.

Shepard listened to her breathing inside her helmet, keeping her eyes on the armored and helmeted turian that floated a good dozen meters from her. She herd a strange hissing sound. It was the oxygen from the small reserve thank on her back feeding into her helmet, but it sounded... wrong. Shepard reached behind her in a panic, the tubes feeding the oxygen had been severed.

"Nihlus, my oxygen supply's been cut!"

She struggled, trying to grab the tubes, to reconnect them or close them off and maybe give herself a few precious seconds. Maybe enough time for a ship to pick her up.

"Don't panic! Try to stay calm! Hold your breath if you have to, just hold on!"

Nihlus grabbed a piece of the hull floating past in an attempt to propel himself toward her. It helped, but he would not reach her in time. He could faintly see the oxygen turn to ice as it escaped her tank. She was grabbing at her neck, she was suffocating! He heard her gasping for air. It was a horrible, gut wrenching sound.

"Sonya!" He called to her, reaching out for her in vein. "Sonya! No!"

She was trying to scream, but to no avail. It was getting harder to breathe, her chest was tight. She couldn't force any air into her lungs. The vacuum of space was stealing her breath from her, compressing her lungs. Her limbs grew heavy and went numb. Her head was pounding from the lack of oxygen in her blood. Nihlus' voice what shouting in her ears, but she couldn't answer him. She felt panicked, afraid, and angry that this was happening when they were so close to rescue.

The sun was rising around the horizon of the planet below. It's rays blinded her as she perished. Her body began to fall toward the surface, caught in the planet's gravitational pull. Her vision spotted, then went black. The shouting in her ears grew dim, as if she was hearing him with her head under water. He was telling her he loved her, but she already knew. Then the pain stopped. The last throbs of her heart beat faded into the back ground. She felt the sensation of falling, or maybe flying... then there was a light. A small pinpoint in the vast emptiness. She felt compelled toward it. Something about it felt safe. She could smell grass and the saltiness of an ocean breeze. Suddenly she didn't feel afraid to die.

Nihlus howled inside his suite, rage filled his mind and pain tore out his heart. How could this happen when the Alliance was so close? Why hadn't they been faster? Why hand't he just thrown her in the pod? She was dieing and it was his fault. He watched uselessly as her body caught in the gravity of the planet below.

"I love you..." He cried. He wanted her to know, if she could still hear him, before she died. He wanted to tell her one last time.

Garrus was watching intently. He saw the last pod eject and immediately grabbed the radio. He focused the signal in to the emergency frequency.

"Shepard? Shepard, do you read me?" Garrus' voice was static on the com. Joker reluctantly hit the button to reply.

"Garrus, it's Joker. I've got some bad news."

That's all Garrus needed to hear. He knew the rest. He searched the floating debris intently from the small view port. The strange, rock armored ship was gone. The Normandy was nothing but pieces of metal floating in space, falling toward the planet below. She had to be out there. Had to be. He spotted some erratic movement. One was unmistakably turian the other looked human. The coloring of the armor left little doubt. It was Sonya. Her oxygen tubes had come loose, or been severed. She was suffocating and there wasn't a damn thing he could do about it. He slammed a fist against the wall of the pod. Static came through on the radio, then a human voice.

"...iance. Please respond. Repeat; This is the Alliance. Please respo..d."

Garrus hit the com button.

"We're ok. Get Shepard! Shepard and Kryik are spaced in the debris field. Shepard's oxygen has been cut off! Do you copy? Save Shepard!"

"We copy. We're scanning the debris for her now. We will fi..."

"Send a shuttle, now! She's dieing out there!" He shouted.

His turian temper was getting the better of him. They weren't going to save her in time. He could still see her out the view port. She'd stopped moving. Stopped struggling. It was too late. He had intended on letting the Alliance vessel know how pissed he was, but he hit the com button so hard he broke the control panel. He ignored the looks from the crew in the pod with him and glowered in his seat.

Kryik's com picked up on the last bit of the transmission. It appeared he was not the only one who'd loved her. He was right to trust Garrus with her life, if only for that reason. Now it didn't matter. She was gone and he was alone again. Something in Nihlus died with Sonya. His heart broke the moment she quit struggling. Spectre Kryik answered the com.

"This is Spectre Kryik. Do you read me? I'm approximately two kilometers from the debris origin. Requesting shuttle pick up and evac pod rescue. Do you copy?"

"We copy. We're sending a shuttle now. Is Spectre Shepard recoverable?"

Nihlus hesitated, his eyes still locked on the last place he saw evidence of her existence.

"Negative. Spectre Shepard has been lost. Repeat, Shepard is dead."


	4. After Shock

Evac pods were collected like pearls from the water. Nihlus was plucked from the black by a shuttle sent out from the lead ship. The survivor's medical needs were tended to before each was thoroughly debriefed. The Spectre was no different. He gave his report as disconnected and cold as if he hadn't experienced the attack personally, but it was the opposite. The loss was only too real, too... personal. Whispers of his relationship with the Commander had raised concerns before and after the creation of the SDA. His lack of an emotional response promptly hushed the rumors. The general consensus being that no one could have suffered such a loss and be so emotionally distant from the pain. Others argued that, because of the intensity of their relationship in combination with the situation of Shepard's death, his disconnect was proof. Those theories, though closest to the truth, were not vastly shared and died out quickly when the coldness didn't pass.

Joker was grounded. He spent most of his days trying to get freelance jobs, most of which were not the legal sort. It didn't matter as long as he was flying. He often thought to himself that he should have been born a bird.

Liara vanished for a while. It was assumed that she went back to her archaeological studies. Rumors whispered in the halls that she'd been seen briefly on Omega with a drell. More rumors spawned from those that the drell was her lover and they'd run away together, until she appeared on Illium. She quickly became a very well known and successful Information Broker.

Kaiden Alenko continued to pursue his career with melancholy purpose. It was, in his mind, the only option. His work was his life, and it fulfilled him for a while. Eventually that would change when a co-worker set him up on a blind date. Nothing changes over night, but his nights did change.

Garrus poured himself in his work at C-Sec., but soon became to frustrated with the limitations to care. He left to become the Spectre he probably should have been, against his father's wished and bellows of rage, but that didn't suit him any better. The bureaucrats and politics was just too much. No one wanted to listen, or take risks. He wasn't sure how Kryik could deal with it, unless the turian simply didn't report all of his activities. He sat, miserable, disillusioned, and inebriated at a table in Flux when he over heard two shipping merchants conversing at the table next to his. They were taking a shipment of supplies to Omega on their next run.

"Omega..." Garrus thought to himself, "A festering pit of the galaxies worst all in one spot. No rules or laws to break, no rules or laws to follow..."

He turned casually toward the two volis and switched seats to join them. They stopped talking and glared at him from within their suits.

"Can we _help_ you?" One of them asked.

"You're going to Omega?" Garrus asked, lifting his umpteenth glass of liquor to his mouth.

"Why do you want to know?" Asked the other.

"I was _wondering_ if I could _procure_ passage on your _fine_ vessel." Garrus replied rather sarcastically.

"We're not a passenger ship. Sorry." The first one answered. They two started to leave when Garrus threw down enough chit credits to stop them in their tracks.

"Will that buy me a corner of your cargo hold?"

The volis brother looked at each other. The silent communication between them didn't take long before they nodded and moved to take the chits. Garrus was drunk, but he was still quick. He grabbed the chits just before the volis could get their hands on them.

"Ah! Not so fast. I want a guarantee you won't take my money and run, so to speak." He said. He was having difficulty keeping the slur out of his speech.

"We would _never_ do such a thing to a _paying_ customer." One said and the each gave a half bow.

"You get your money when I get my corner. No questions, not a word or anyone or anything. Understood?" Garrus glowered at them, resting his talons casually his sidearm.

"Yes, we understand. We're docked at pier nineteen near the shipping wards. Be there at 0700 or we're leaving without you."


	5. Waking Up

Nihlus filled his days with work. He chased geth, he brought down corrupted business officials and politicians. Nothing ever surfaced of the Reapers. Soon he began to question through the haze of days if the Reapers were just a ploy of Saren's design. He did his duty, like a programmed battle drone. Spectre by day. His soul was gone and what was left was cold knowledge and training. His life operated on instinct. He ate, he slept, he killed if it was easier, or if he was having a bad when the day was done and evening's light left the sky he fell apart He frequented exotic bars and women, though he still shunned the consort, if for no other reason than it reminded him of _her_. He preferred_ less expensive_ 'company', if company was to be had. He didn't remember them the next day. He didn't care. Most of the time he didn't even get their names before bedding them and whispering his mate's name to the the darkness.

Two years later he began to hear rumors that Shepard was back, she was alive. But that was impossible. He'd watched her die. No one comes back from death, especially after two years. His disbelief was solidified when the rumor was enhanced with talk of Shepard's employment with Cerberus. They had taken out too many of their bases, seen too many of the horrors they inflicted on alien and human alike. No, Shepard would never work for them, even if she had lived. He thought about contacting Liara, out of curiosity. Cerberus was an intriguing thought. Maybe they cloned her somehow. It was said that Liara was working for the Shadow Broker, but he had his doubts of the validity of any gossip. It was irrelevant either way. _If_ what people were saying about Shepard was somehow was true... He had to find her.

* * *

A dull boom rocked Shepard in her sleep. Her ears popped and the sound of explosions assaulted her auditory senses. Something cold and hard was beneath her as if she lay on a dissection tray. Maybe she had been knocked unconscious and she lay in the hall of the Normandy. The smell of antiseptic assaulted her olfactory's, sparking disturbing fears. Maybe she was in surgery and the anesthetic had worn off. She hesitated to open her eyes. She didn't want to wake and find her limbs missing, or worse. Her head felt fuzzy, like she was dizzy. She had to make sure she and Joker got to the shuttles. Nihlus would be waiting for her. Her head swam with pain. She felt nauseous. She saw the horizon of a planet from space. The sun was beginning to set behind it. Or was it peaking around it? It was unique way to see the sunrise, one she felt lucky to see each time the Normandy passed by a planet. The grass needed cut, as well. It was too her chin. How did she ever let it get so high? She heard a loud boom. She looked around, panicked. What was going on? Who was attacking? Where's Nihlus?

"Wake up, Commander." a female voice was trying to tear Shepard from sleep over the intercom.

Shepard's head throbbed. Her chest ached, her limbs felt numb. She tried to open her eyes to see what was beyond the black.

"Shepard, do you hear me? Get out of that bed, now. This facility is under attack." The voice became demanding.

Shepard's eyes fluttered open. It was hard to focus. Everything was blurry and swimming. It made her sick to her stomach. She tried to sit up, suddenly aware that she was laying down on something hard and cold. Pain shot through her jaw and into her head. She winced in pain and grabbed at her chin, falling back to the table.

"What had happened to my face? What happened to me?" She wondered, feeling disoriented and confused. She fingered the unfamiliar flaws on her skin.

"Shepard, you're scars aren't healed, but I need you to get moving. This facility is under attack." the voice beaconed over the intercom.

Shepard attempted to sit up a little more slowly. Another shock of pain ripped through her side. She winced and reflexively held the area in pain, groaning. Looking out a window over head she saw gun fire and heard another 'd had enough of explosions. She looked around. It looked like some kind of med bay. Was she on the Alliance ship? Had the attackers returned? Maybe she had been unconscious due to lack of... oxygen... Her memories were fuzzy as she tried to recall what had happened before she blacked out.

"There's a pistol in the locker on the other side of the room. Hurry!" The woman shouted on the intercom.

Shepard managed to get down off the human sized tray she was on. She tried to focus as she stumbled toward what she hoped was the locker the woman on the com was shouting about. She felt almost as bad as she had after the Prothean Beacons.

"Grab the pistol and armor from the locker." the voice instructed.

Shepard opened the locker and grabbed the pistol and light armor inside. She dressed as quickly as she dared, leaning heavily on the support of the locker. She wasn't sure when or what the last thing she ate was, but she felt sure she was going to find out soon. The com in the suit came to life with the same voice that had wakened her once it was securely in place. She examined the pistol and found it lacking.

"This pistol doesn't have a thermal clip." Shepard told the woman.

"It's a med-bay. We'll get you a clip from... damn it! Those canisters are going to blow, take cover!"

Shepard saw the burning canisters by the door and took the closest available cover. How did this woman know all this stuff? Was she watching her? What the _hell_ was going on?

The canisters exploded with a loud bang. Shrapnel zinged through the air, bouncing off equipment and finally littering the floor in a series of pinging sounds. Shepard moved to the doors which opened upon her approach. There was a thermal clip of the floor next to a charred body. Shepard picked up the clip. She didn't need to be told what to do with it, but the woman seemed to disagree.

There was another door on the other side of the small corridor. When it opened there a steel barrier blocking the path. Shepard hopped over it and nearly missed a shot to the head by a well meaning LOKI mech. Shepard took cover behind a crate. The woman was still saying obvious things, and something about evac shuttles. Shepard popped up out of cover and hit the mech with a well placed shot to the head. There was another clip near by. She didn't hesitate to take it. There were also some dead human bodies in black and white uniforms. The insignia on the uniforms and the walls didn't look familiar. If she had a bad feeling about the whole thing before, she had a worse one now.

"Someone's hacking security trying to kill you." the woman told her over the com.

"Well that's just wonderful." Shepard mumbled. The woman either ignored her or didn't hear.

Shepard decided this wasn't an Alliance ship, but things were still exploding and she was still evacuating. Only this time someone was after her. Up the stairs and through the doors she found a tech lab. The woman advised her to the presences of more mechs. Shepard took cover behind what she hoped was bullet proof glass railing. One mech came through the door, followed by another. Four more appeared out of a supply closet. Shepard let the bullets fly, hitting her targets in rapid succession.

"Nice work, Shepard. The coast is clear."

Shepard was annoyed. She wasn't a cadet anymore. She didn't need this lady holding her hand and patting her on the head. She needed answers and she needed to get the hell out of there. She ran to the door on the other side. Across the hall through a window the adjacent corridor was engulfed in fire. She watched helplessly as a heavy mech gunned down two human window didn't shatter. Shepard made a mental note. She rounded the corner to find more bodies, all human. She went through the next door. There was another body, male, on the floor. Dark blood pooled around his head. She tried not to look to hard at the gaping wound in his skull or the brain matter exposed behind it. The grenade launcher he'd been using was on the floor next to him. Shepard had to pry his cold, tense fingers from the trigger.

"Take the grenade launcher, use it to take out the mechs." said the woman.

"Well, no crap lady." Shepard shot back. She was getting sick of this. "Just give me directions. I can handle the rest."

"Very well." the voice came back sounding a bit pissed off.

.

Shepard didn't particularly care just then. She picked up the launcher, but took the mechs out with her pistol as they came through the doors on the level below her. The launcher only had three grenades in it. There was always something bigger to kill, so she decided to save it. A small grin spread on her lips in her spite of the woman's instructions. The last mech through the door exploded when something caused a near by container of something flammable began spewing fire from a broken valve.

"Take the elevator down one floor." the voice advised.

Shepard found the 'elevator' was nothing more than a small lift platform with rails. She charged through the wall of flame without a second thought. The suit kept the heat out, but the roar of the fire as she passed through it was somewhat un-nerving. It reminded her of the fires on the armory deck of the Normandy, and

"Nihlus." She finished the thought aloud. He had to find out what happened to him.

"Shepard..." Static was cutting the link. "... do you read... Shepard...I've go... my position." the transmission cut her off.

More doors, more corridors. Shepard entered a small lab in hopes of finding some answers. Two mechs were crawling on the floor. They exploded before she had time to shoot them. Shepard accessed a lap top on the desk nearest the door. It brought up an image of a woman to the screen. She seemed familiar with her dark hair and white uniform. The voice was like that of the one who'd woke her. She was saying something about bio/synthetic fusion on a subject. That made her nervous. Maybe Saren was right about the future. The thought sent a chill through her. She wondered where the subject was and if it was worth it to save them. In her experience, most victims who got sucked into sick experiments ended up being something less than they were before. Whatever had happened to her, the things she couldn't remember, she did remember that.

The other laptop was a voice recording of a disgruntled employee. He was complaining about his wages. Probably the guy shooting up the place. It wouldn't surprise her. She found some credits in a vault and took them. No point in letting them burn.

She left the lab and hurried down the hall and through more doors. A human male banged on the window as she passed, shouting her name and begging for help. The corridor behind him was an inferno. There was nothing she could do, the glass was nigh indestructible. She moved on as quickly as possible. Behind her she heard the man's screams stop after close rage gun fire. She didn't have time to think about it, and pushed the guilt aside.

She paused for a moment to look out a large view port to space. There was a burning star in the distance, maybe a white dwarf or a small sun. She tried to remember star maps to try and figure out where she was, but couldn't recall anything helpful. She went through a set doors on her left that opened to a larger area. Shots were flying through the air. She took cover behind a row of seating. A human male with dark skin was firing on attacking LOKI mechs across a open divide. He saw her as she crouched down and fired a shot at the mechs.

"Shepard!" he shouted, then mumbled, "What the hell...?"

Everyone seemed to know her name and it was getting really annoying. She needed answers and this guy wasn't dead, yet. She took her next opportunity to dive to cover beside him.

"What are you doin' here? I thought you were still a work in progress?" He asked her.

"_Work in progress_? I just woke up to gun fire and explosions. The last thing I remember is being spaced. If _you_ got answers, I need 'em. Now!" Her mouth didn't want to fully form the words. She hoped they came out clear enough for him to understand her.

"_Damn_! Sorry, I forgot this is all new to you. I'm Jacob Taylor and I've been stationed here for..." He popped up to shoot a mech as it exited the doors.

Shepard couldn't help but notice his build. He was less a meter from her. He had a broad chest and shoulders, narrow hips and a rather large bulge at his crotch. She shook her head. She didn't need to see that. Nihlus was all the broad chested, narrow hipped and large membered male she needed. She just needed to _find_ him. She waited for Taylor to crouch down again before opening her eyes. He smelled good, like some kind of spice and something else she didn't recognize. He had a nice face, but she didn't find him all that attractive. Too... _human_. She felt strange that she thought that. Too human? She pushed the feeling away. If she was going to find her bond mate she needed to focus.

"Things must be worse than I thought if Miranda's got you running around. I'll fill you in, but we'd better get you to the shuttle first." Taylor told her.

"Ever since I woke up someone has been telling me what to do and where to go. I'm not doing _anything _until _you_ tell me exactly what the _hell_ is happening." She ordered. She'd had enough. She'd rather return to comma, or death or wherever she'd been before this than put up with more crap.

"Fair enough, I'll give you the quick version." Jacob answered, to his credit, his gaze didn't falter. "You and your ship were attacked and destroyed. You were killed. Dead as dead can be when they brought you here. Our scientists spent the last two years putting you back together. You've been comatose or worse the whole time. Welcome back to your life." He was looking her strait in the eye. He wasn't lying.

"Wait, I'm having trouble wrapping my head around this. Two years?" She didn't bother hiding the disbelief in her voice. "I've been dead for two years?"

"The Alliance declared you KIA. The whole galaxy thinks you're dead, and we don't get to those shuttles... they'll be right."

Shepard was quiet for a moment. She let Taylor take a few more shots at the mechs. So, she _had _died. Why couldn't she remember anything from being dead? The memory tickled the back of her mind, but she couldn't recall it. Two years... She thought about her last moments, what she could remember. She'd sent Garrus to the evac shuttles. She remembered putting Joker in a pod... Alliance ships dropping out of FTL. They had been too late for her. She remembered Nihlus' voice on her com, telling her he loved her just before everything went back.

"Were there any other survivors from the Normandy?" She asked.

"I'll tell you help me finish of these mechs and I'll play twenty questions with you all day." Jacob answered. It was his turn to start feeling annoyed.

She nodded. Taylor informed her that he was a biotic. She nodded again and he lit up in blue flame, pulling two of the mechs through the air. She tested out her own biotics and sent them crashing hard to the ground below. Yep, still worked. Had some new stuff too. Nice. She briefly wondered if they'd left anything _out_ to put some crazy tech _in_. The thought came to her numbly. The fact that she'd been dead and brought back, for all intents and purposes, a cyborg hand't quite set in yet.

"Ok. I promised I'd answer your questions. What do you wanna know?" He did't sound happy about playing 'Jeopardy' with her.

"What can you tell me about the project? were there other test subjects?"

"Project Lazarus only hand one subject. The whole point was to bring _you_ back. Just you." He gestured weakly to her.

The news hit her hard. She never expected that she was the only one. What was so special about _her_?

"Why me?" She asked the question aloud.

"I don't have that answer." He shook his head. "But I will get you to the person who does."

"Okay. I remember the Normandy blowing up. Did anyone else make it?" She felt her stomach flutter.

"Just about everybody survived. A few servicemen from the lower decks didn't get out. Navigator Pressly was killed by an explosion. Everyone else, including the non-Alliance crew... the asari; Liara, the turians...they all made it out alive."

Shepard felt her hear leap in her chest. They were alive! Nihlus was alive! For a few seconds she was exceedingly happy. Then her heart sank as she remembered how long she'd been gone. Would he still feel the same after thinking she was dead for the last two years? Had he moved on? Her own questions stung her as if Taylor had pulled out a knife and stabbed her in the chest.

"They were my team. If they knew I was alive, they'd come for me." Shepard nodded in her false certainty. She'd implied all of them, meant all of them, but she only thought of Nihlus. Something inside her twinged. A pang of guilt pricked her heart, making it heavy in her chest.

"Maybe you can track them down once we got off the station, _if_ we get off the station." Taylor suggested. His brow knitted and he looked to the side. Something was bothering him.

"What's the quickest way to the shuttle." She was ready to go. She needed to go.

Taylor was about to answer when he got a ping on his omni-tool com. Someone called Wilson. The name sounded familiar. They headed toward the shuttle. They would meet up with Wilson on the way. A few mechs and an annoyed conversation between Taylor and Wilson and they found the bald man of the floor of server room B. His face looked like someone she should know. He'd been shot in the leg. Shepard grabbed some medi-gel from the med-kit on the wall and applied it to the wound while Wilson complained. Shepard examined the wound as she applied the gel. The entry of the projectile didn't seem to fit his story. It was too steep of an entry, like it was self inflicted. She glanced up at him warily from behind her eye shield.

Taylor and Wilson argued more, about the mechs, about what Wilson was doing in the server room. She didn't care. She needed to get out of there. If Wilson didn't suspect that she knew, he may be useful getting out off the station.

"You're all strangers to me." She waved a hand at them dismissively. "Let's get some place safe and then we'll sort out who's fault it is." She kept her eyes shifting equally between them.

They agreed with her about the same time mechs came through the doors. Wilson used his omni-tool to blow up some canisters blocking the path, effectively taking the mechs with them. Shepard headed for the open doors. It was past time to get out of here.


	6. Shuttle Ride

Taylor told her that Cerberus had brought her back. It made her already nauseous stomach twist into a was every bit the traitor Shepard knew him to be. Miranda shot him, no questions asked. It wasn't exactly what she would have done, but the man hadn't been on her team. Shepard didn't waste time with questions and answers. She was ready to get off the station. This 'Illusive Man' had better have some answers.

The shuttle jumped into FTL. Shepard was impressed, but not surprised that they had a FTL capable shuttle. She stared out the window watching the stars fly by. So much time had passed. She wondered how much had changed in that time, technological advances, political progress... the locations and status of her crew. One particular member was of greater concern to her, and that was Nihlus. Her desperation to reunite with him, and the anxiety of what that encounter might bring, ate at her like millions of tiny bugs crawling up and down her spine and in her brain. Her heart ached in her chest as if it might crush itself with the stress of it all.

"Before you meet with the Illusive Man we need to ask you a few questions to evaluate your condition."

Miranda's soft, but commanding words interrupted Sonya's thoughts. She leaned back into the cushiony leather seat, exhausted and a little afraid. Not of Miranda, or Cerberus's unknown task, or even the eventual doom of the Reapers. She was afraid that she'd lost something that she might not be able to get back, besides time. Lost time she could deal with. More correctly, she was afraid she'd lost some_one_. That single thought was more terrifying than anything else she'd experienced, including death.

"What? We have to do this now?" Taylor asked.

"We should have done weeks of testing to confirm the success of project Lazarus." Miranda said, turning sharply to Jacob. "A few questions during the shuttle ride will have to suffice."

"Okay.." Jacob relented. He activated his omni-tool and brought up a list of questions designed to test Shepard's memory as well as evaluate her physiatric stability. He picked one of the more basic questions to start and looked Shepard in the eye.

"Records show that you grew up on Earth. Tough environment, no parents. You enlisted and held off, almost single handedly, an enemy attack during the Skyllian Blitz. You remember that?"

Shepard thought for a moment. She remembered. She remembered the bodies, the colonists screaming as they fired their weapons. She remembered how exhausted she was, how close she'd come to loosing faith that the Alliance would arrive in time. She remembered trying to sum it all up nicely for Spectre Kryik over a few glasses of booze in the Embassy Lounge.

"Yeah, I remember," She said flatly. "People screaming, gunfire, blood everywhere. I stayed focused, kept the team focused, long enough to hold off the bastards until the Alliance arrived with reinforcements."

"I read the report. That was one hell of a hold off, Commander." He nodded to her with respect, then turned to the lovely woman sitting next to him. "Satisfied, Miranda?"

"Almost. Let's try something more recent." She looked to Shepard and narrowed her eyes. "Virmire, where you destroyed Saren's cloning facility. You had to leave one of your squad behind to die in the blast."

"Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams was killed in action. Why was she left behind?" Taylor finished the question.

Remembering that day was a little harder, not because the memory itself was difficult to access, it was just... unpleasant to think about.

"I left a friend to die that day, and I didn't do it casually. Kryik made the initial decision. We argued the point and agreed there was only time and man power to save one. Kaiden was guarding the bomb. If the geth got to it and deactivated it, the mission and lives lost would have been for nothing." She paused, blinking back a few tears that threatened to wet her eyes. "Chief Williams died a hero."

She wasn't blinking back tears for Williams. Hell, she barely spoke to the woman. The tears were for the memories of Nihlus. Having to recall them, the knowledge of the time that had passed, what he must have gone through when she died, slowly realizing what she was now... Was she even blinking real tears? She glanced back at the window. The dim light of the shuttle caught in her eyes at just the right angle, and for a split second she could see the implants in her eyes that allowed her to see while the tissue was still being repaired and regenerated. A red glow from the implants holding her face together seemed like the burning embers of the Normandy as she floated through space away from the only place that ever really felt like home.

"I understand, Commander. No one is doubting the decision. Everyone at Cerberus knows that facility had to be destroyed." Jacob said.

She wondered if he really did understand. How could he possibly know what she'd gone through? Did he even thing about what she was going through now? Did they care? Probably not. Why would they? She was a new toy for their master to play with. An experiment that succeeded without destroying the subject.

"There are other tests we really should run," said Miranda.

"Come on, Miranda." Jacob interjected. "Enough with the quizzes. The memories are there, and I can vouch for Shepard's combat skills personally."

Shepard wanted to hug Taylor for speaking on her behalf. She wasn't sure how many more memories she could tolerate to drudge up. They seemed to all have Nihlus securely wrapped in them like a child in a warm blanket. He'd so gradually become the center of her life, she felt as if she would have to relearn how to do... everything. Except combat. That's the only thing that seemed to stick without him having to be there, so far. That may change in future battles if she was forced to face them without him.

Miranda said something about the Illusive Man and evidence with a bit of a bite to the last of her words. Sonya didn't care. She was only half listening after she was sure they questions had stopped. The shuttle slowed then dropped out of FTL. The familiar vertigo washed over her then passed. At least that was the same. As_ un_comfortable a feeling it was, it offered her some consolation.


	7. The Beginning

Jacob Taylor was interesting, or at least secretive enough to seem that way. Ex-Alliance turned Cerberus, but told the boss off on occasion. Shepard kind of liked him. He reminded her a little of Garrus. She missed her old team, friends that were like family, but the Illusive Man had made it painfully clear they were unavailable for whatever reason.

Miranda Lawson was a hard woman, at least on the outside. She was serious because she wanted to be taken seriously. A quality Shepard could understand and respect. However, for someone who'd spent the last two years rebuilding her, Lawson didn't seem to care for her too much. It could be jealousy, though Ms. Lawson had given a different reason. Shepard wasn't entirely convinced that even Miranda believed some of the crap that came out of her own mouth.

The Illusive Man had startled her at first. He had similar ocular implants to her own, making her wonder what circumstances had come to pass that he had gotten them. Was it an accident, as in her case, or had he chosen the 'up grade'? It was frivolous wonderment. She was taken back at the fact that, the man who seemed to have information to rival the Shadow Broker, did not know Vakarian's location or movements. Or for that matter, what Kaiden or Kryik were doing. Top secret or not, she figured with the resources at his disposal, the Illusive Man could have found out anything he wanted to know.

The politely rude man was sending her on a mission to a place called Freedom's Progress to investigate the disappearance of human colonists, and not just a few. Entire populations of the colonies were being taken with no signs to point to a culprit. Apparently the Council was under-concerned because the colonies were on the boarders of Citadel space. It made Shepard sick that the Council was behaving in such a way after Eden Prime. However, it was possible that they had sent a _Spectre_ to investigate, or that one had decided to do so on their own... Her heart fluttered in her chest on the trip to the planet. Nihlus could be there. His reaction excited and vexed her. She flexed her fingers nervously in her lap as she stared out the view port.

* * *

Nihlus Kryik opened his eyes from another dreamless sleep in his apartment on the upper levels of the Presidium. Part of him wished he hadn't woken, that he had died under the arm of Sovereign, or in the vacuum of space with... He pushed the memory that haunted him from his mind. The feeling of utter helplessness and guilt weighed on him like a planet strapped to his back. It surprised him every morning he was able to move under the burden.

The white of the pillow his face was buried in block his view and smelled of alcohol. His head pounded in his skull, his body ached. He managed to prop himself up to a sitting position, becoming aware of the other three bodies in the large bed with him. Two of them were asari, and they lay together on his left. The deep blue of one in contrast to the lavender of the other. They each had face paint decorating the area around their eyes in a silvery tone. Two for the price of one. The other woman lay on his right, and she was human. Her petite, slender body not unlike Sonya's if she had been a little taller and more battle hardened. Her hair was a strawberry color. It was hard to find blonds, let alone one who would go freely to his bed. Her face was rounder, but he seemed to remember that her eyes were dark like Sonya's. Her inner thighs held the tell tale marks of having mated with a turian, and they were fresh. The rest of her body was bare of marks, just as the asari's were.

He rubbed his eyes with the heel of his hands. He must have been to drunk to kick them out after the fun was over. He preferred to wake up alone. The human woman stirred in her sleep but didn't wake. He decided he should get his money's worth being that they were still there. He wasn't paying for conversation. He was simply renting the rights to use their bodies for his pleasure. They didn't need to be conscious to fulfill that contract.

The deed was done quickly, and none too gentle. Promptly afterward he gave them time enough to dress then kicked them out while he was still fully extended. He left their credits on a small table by the door on his way to the lavatory to wash and take the preventative medication to cleanse his system of anything unwanted. He had nothing of value, so he was unconcerned with theft. He heard the door shut behind them before he turned on the water in the shower stall and got in.

The water was warm, and refreshing on his exposed skin. The steam helped clear his head and purge the stink of his defilement from his olfactory senses. His shame was only rivaled by his self loathing. He washed until he ran out of soap and his plates were soft enough to be pliable before he got out and dried off. He didn't bother to put the robe back on. He lived alone.

He ate his breakfast on the small balcony, then proceeded to pack for the trip. He would need little, most of which he could carry on his person. He donned his armor, fully loaded with every weapon at his disposal. The luggage he took with him contained mostly ammo and heat sinks. He did bring with him one casual wear uniform. If his mission was successful, he would need something besides armor to wear no matter what answers he found.


	8. SR2 Normandy

**I've taken some liberties with the story time line. I hope this doesn't detract from your enjoyment.**

Shepard was surprised and elated to find Tali on Freedom's Progress, but she was on her own mission and, regretfully, couldn't join Shepard. It had been good to see her either way. At least she knew she was alive and doing well. It was unfortunate that Prazza and the others had to die, but it had been their own ill judgment and mistrust that put them in that situation. Shepard was't happy Cerberus' actions against the Flotilla. She couldn't get a strait answer on what the issue had been exactly. Why they were there, or what they were after. She decided it wasn't important. Cerberus should not have been there and that was the point. On the positive side of things, the mission was a success. They found a survivor of the attack, a quarian male who was there on pilgrimage. The security surveillance vid Veetor had manually pieced together provided them with disturbing images. Collectors, a secluded and secretive race, were the ones responsible for abducting the colonists. They employed the use of some kind of bug like tech to 'freeze' their victims. Then the people were placed in strange pods and carted away to the Collectors' ship. Shepard hoped that his omni-tool data would reveal something useful.

The Illusive Man gave her a list of dossiers to find and recruit for her team. She was going after the Collectors and possibly the Reapers. It seemed she drew attention to humanity when she helped destroy Sovereign. Whatever they wanted with humans, she was going to stop them. Rescue of those taken, if possible, was a secondary objective.

The first four to be persuaded to join were mostly aliens, which surprised her coming from a pro-human group like Cerberus. Jack, a human inmate on a space station prison. Okeer, a krogan geneticist. Dr. Mordin Solus, a salarian genius. And lastly 'Archangel', a turian vigilante. The doctor and the vigilante both were located on Omega. She would go there first. She wanted to provide the doctor with all the time she could afford him for study and solution of the 'seeker swarm' problem.

A list of potential team members was not the only thing the Illusive Man had to give her. He was providing her with her first team member, excluding Lawson and Taylor of whom she apparently she had no choice. Someone she could 'trust'.

"Hey, Commander!"

A familiar male voice called to her from the stairs behind her. Her face lit up with a smile as she turned to see Joker, and he was _standing_ at the foot of the stair.

"Just like old times, hu?" Joker grinned at her.

Shepard met the helmsman with open arms. She did her best not to squeeze too hard. Joker returned her embrace. It was good to see her alive again. He wasn't going to ask questions. Cerberus brought her back. That was enough.

"I can't believe it's you, Joker..." Shepard repeated the sentiment as they left the dark stairway.

"Look who's talkin. I saw you get spaced!" Joker answered.

"I got lucky, and there's a lot of strings attached." Shepard said, her brow knitted when she thought of just how much she felt like a marionette. "How'd you get here?"

"It all fell apart without you, Commander. Everything you stirred up, the Council just wanted it gone. The team was broken up, records sealed, and I was grounded. The Alliance took away the only thing that mattered to me. _Hell_ _yeah_, I joined Cerberus."

"You really trust the Illusive Man?" Shepard asked, a bit surprised by Joker.

"I don't trust anyone who makes more than I do." Joker scoffed, "but they aren't all bad. Saved your life, let me fly." He looked to Shepard as he faced a darkened window overlooking the hangar bay. "Then there's this." He crossed his arms. "They only told me last night."

The lights in the hangar bay came on as if on que. The sight that filled Shepard's vision was surreal. There she was, a frigate that could have been the Normandy's twin sister. The designation beside the Cerberus insignia was SR2.

"It's good t be home, hu, Commander?" Joker said, taking the though right out of her head.

"I guess we'll have to give her a name." Shepard said, smiling. They both knew there was only one name the ship could have.

Shepard stood behind the helmsman's chair, as Joker started the ignition sequence. Her blood rushed in her veins as she felt the engines come to life. Joker eased the Normandy SR2 out of the hanger bay of the Cerberus station and prepared to enter FTL toward the Omega region of space.

"Are you ready for this, Commander?" Joker teased. He knew she'd know what he meant. First jump of the day, first jump on the new ship, and the Commander was standing a meter behind his chair ready to blast off into to galaxy.

"I'm ready, Joker. Let's get it on." She teased back.

A smile lit up his face as the kinky thoughts resurfaced like a long lost friend. He hit the button to confirm their destination and the Normandy took flight. The vertigo remained unchanged, as it came and went, a familiar and welcome discomfort.

"Was it good for you?" Shepard beat Joker to the jest.

"Always!" Joker laughed back at her. Just like old times... almost.

"Welcome aboard the new Normandy, Commander." Taylor said as he and Miranda escorted her to the main floor of the command deck.

Shepard noted the modernization of the equipment and the brighter, cleaner look of the ship. So far, she liked it.

"I've been looking after the dossiers and I'd strongly recommend starting by acquiring Mordin Solus, the salarian professor. We'll need him to develop a counter measure against the Collectors imobiliza.." Miranda began.

"That's the plan." Shepard stopped her with a raised hand. She didn't need everything spelled out for her. She'd been dead, not dumb struck.

"Acquiring Mordin Solus is the most logical place to start." Said a new voice over the com.

"Who are you?" Shepard asked, highly suspicious that she knew the answer.

"I am the Normandy's Artificial Intelligence."

The voice spoke from a console behind Shepard. She turned to face the blue image displayed there. It made her feel even less human as the similarities of the image displayed to represent the AI looked to her like a pawn, reminding her of her own inhuman components.

"The crew like to refer to me as EDI." The AI continued.

Shepard crossed her arms. She wasn't sure what to think at this point. VI's could be bad enough, but an AI? It was dangerous. The geth were AI's created to help their creators and instead became their own race, 'causing havoc in quarian culture. She didn't need her ship going rouge on her.

"What are your limitations?" Shepard asked frankly.

"I am not in control of the ship, Commander." EDI answered, guessing Shepard's anxiety. "Due to the potential dangers of a rouge AI, Cerberus has severely restricted my capabilites. During combat I operate the electronic warfare and cyber warfare suites. Beyond that, I cannot interface with the ships systems. I observe and offer analysis and advice. Nothing more."

EDI's image bliped out when she finished her explanation. Shepard turned back to the two Cerberus officers.

"Jacob and I should return to our posts. Come find us if you have any questions." Miranda said coolly and left the deck.

Jacob saluted the Commander and silently followed Miranda around the galaxy map, where he veered off to the armory. Miranda took the elevator down to the crew deck, leaving the Commander to wander the ship until they reached Omega.


	9. Making a List

Shepard introduced herself to her personal assistant, who was very cheerful and a bit much for her to take so she politely left the yeoman to her duties. Next she met the chief/janitor, that was disturbing to say the least, shortly before discovering that Dr. Chakwas had found her way to the Normandy. Her tale of the Alliance's movements over the last two years was less than inspiring. She couldn't blame the woman, or Joker for that matter, for joining up with Cerberus considering what the group was offering them. She added a bottle of ice brandy to the list she was compiling, starting with better ingredients for meals. The engineering deck was next. They needed parts for efficiency sake. Back on the command deck and a short chat with Jacob let her know that, while the Normandy was updated from the original, vast improvements would need to be made if they expected to survive an attack on a single Collector ship. It was just more to add to her quickly growing list. It was a good thing the new Normandy was outfitted with mining equipment. Shepard almost ran to the cockpit for a more light hearted conversation.

Joker heard Shepard's foot steps coming up the stairs and across the walk way that led to the cockpit. He spun his chair around in excitement.

"Can you _believe_ this, Commander? It's my _baby_, _better_ than new. It _fits me like a glove_! And _leather seats_! Military may set the hard ware standard, but on a first gen frigate, they could care _less _if the seats breath. Civilian sector comfort, by design." Joker rambled on like a school boy. He was interrupted by EDI.

"Reproduction was not intended, Mr. Moreau. Seamless improvements were made."

"And there's the down side." Joker said. "I liked the Normandy when she was beautiful and quiet. Now she's got this _thing_ I don't wanna talk about. It's like ship cancer."

"I don't trust them, but we still need to move ahead." Shepard said.

"Yeah, I guess you're right." Joker agreed. "So we're stayin' right? I mean, the seat is real leather..."

"Glad to see you're keeping it all in perspective." Shepard teased.

"Uh, _leather_!" Joker played as he turned back to the controls.

Shepard headed to the galaxy map to check their trajectory to Omega before heading up to 'the loft' that was the captain's quarters. She had her own deck, small tough it was, the cabin was huge. Much bigger than the original Normandy's captain's quarters. There were two desks, two levels, fish tanks, a corner sofa that was huge, a king size bed... Hell, she even had her own shower room. It was hard not to get swept up in it all.

For the first time she wondered about Captain Anderson. Had he become a Councillor? How had he handled her death? What did he say at the funeral service? It almost made her laugh at the thought that she could stand there and wonder about her own funeral in past tense.

Sonya removed her Cerberus uniform and tossed it down to the sofa from the upper level of her cabin. The shower room was white and tiled from floor to ceiling. The waist up mirror over the sink didn't reflect the image of herself she was used to. Seeing herself since waking from death for the first time was a shock she had not prepared for. She nearly fainted, but managed to stay standing by grabbing the lip on the sink. Her mind reeled with disbelief before curiosity took over. She examined herself carefully in the reflective surface.

The scars on her face weren't as bad as she thought they might have been, her eyes looked the same when the light didn't hit them just so to reveal the cybernetics hidden there. Her hair was still white blond if only a little longer when she took it our of the bun in which it had been fashioned. Even her bush was still as she remembered it. New scars, that would heal, indicated where she'd been sewn back together like a patchwork quilt. But the scars she knew, the ones she loved, were gone. It was if they'd taken the very memory of him from her. The cuts under her breasts, the lines down her rib cage, back and hips, the nicks in her shoulders, the bite marks, everything was gone. Even the little 'N' shape from his chest spur. It wasn't her skin. It couldn't be. She suddenly felt trapped as if she were in someone else's body that just looked like hers.

Sonya walked in a daze over to the shower and turned it on. The warm water hit her skin and warmed her, relaxing the muscles that were tense under it's rain. Steam filled the room and fogged the mirror, obscuring anything that might reflect in it. Slowly Sonya sunk to the floor and curled into the corner under the shower head. The warm water ran down her face, plastering her hair to a body that shuddered with the force of her tears as they joined the rivets that washed away the dirt and grim of battle.


	10. Mordin's Request

Omega, the cesspool of the galaxy. Shepard never would have pegged it for a place to find good people for a critical mission. But here she was, looking for heros. She didn't hold high hopes for the quality of person she might find in the good doctor or the turian.

Joker brought the Normandy in to dock, smooth as butter. The stench of Omega hit her in the face when the air locks opened like an egg in the face. It was breathable, but who would want to. She kept her helmet shut and the oxygen flowing. She'd also noticed the internally routed delivery system for the oxygen. She wondered if it was because of the conditions that lead to her death that spawned the change in design.

Miranda and Jacob flanked her rear as she strode confidently toward the entry to Omega. A very excited looking salarian ran up to them. She hoped he wasn't the one she was looking for. He didn't seem healthy, or mentally sound.

"Ah! Welcome to Omega. You're new aren't you? I can always tell. Allow me to.."

The salarian abruptly cut himself off when an armed batarian come up behind him.

"Oh... hello, Moklan." He adverted his eyes. "I was just..."

"Leave, Fargot. Now." Moklan ordered.

"Oh, of course, Moklan!" Fargot saluted. "Whatever she wants."

Moklan shooed the salaran away, who ran from his as if he were afraid of bodily harm. Moklan shook his head as he addressed Shepard.

"Damn scavengers." Moklan grumbled. "Welcome to Omega... Shepard."

"You know who I am?" Shepard asked, surprised and a little alarmed. She'd been dead for two years. How the hell did this guy know who she was?

"Of course. We had you tagged the moment you entered the Terminus Systems. You're not as subtle as you think. Aria wants to know what brings a dead Spectre to Omega. I'd suggest you go Afterlife, now, and present yourself."

"Cut the attitude." Shepard spat, her brow knitted in a scowl. "I'm not here to cause problems for Omega."

"Things explode around you, Shepard." His hand made a wide arching motion when he said 'explode' as if it helped to make his point. "You can't blame Aria for wanting to keep an eye on you." Moklan eyed Shepard before he ordered her to Afterlife.

Shepard waited for him to leave before taking her next step. She had no intention of reporting to anyone else. One leash was more than enough. As she made her way to the door EDI provided her with locations on the dossiers and advice on the situations en-route. Apparently, Mordin was in a quarantined zone.

"Sounds like fun. Let's go." Shepard mumbled.

* * *

The turian guarding the entrance to the quarantine zone only let her in because she had a grenade launcher. She wondered if he would have been as cooperative if he knew it was empty. She'd used the last of the grenades to take out the heavy mech at Freedom's Progress. She brought it with her just incase she found ammo for it on the way. The guards inside gave her no trouble. The one stationed by the entry door even advised her of the vorcha and blue suns wars as well as looters. She promised to shoot any looters she found, and though she did some of her own looting, she kept her promise. She left plenty of dead bodies in her wake as she and her team made their way to Mordin's clinic, all but a few by her own hand. The rest were dead before she arrived from the plague, save one. That one died from it _after_ she arrived. A batarian. His kind made a living on slavery. She had no pity for his kind. She got what information she needed from him, then left him to rot with not but the burning bodies of his fellows to keep him company.

The clinic sentinel warned them against use of weapons in the clinic. Shepard mostly ignored him. Any threats he could make she could counter, with deadly accuracy. She found the doctor in the rear of the clinic chatting about different treatment options. Apparently they were running low on meds.

"Professor Mordin Solus?" She asked a tall, one horned salarian with the lightest completion she'd seen on a salarian.

Mordin approached her team and did a quick scan with his omni-tool, presumably for the illness. Satisfied with the results he continued to try and guess who they were and why they were there, speaking rather quickly. It was hard for her to understand every word he said.

"Humm.. Don't recognize you from area. To well armed to be refugees. No mercenary uniforms. Quarantine still in effect."

He left them to continue his work while he talked. Shepard was impressed by his multi tasking abilities. He would indeed be an asset to the team, _if_ she could convince him to come.

"Here for something else." Mordin continued. "Vorcha? Crew to clean them out? Unlikely, Vorcha a symptom not a cause."

He went back to the table, studying Shepard's face with narrowed eyes to see beyond the eye shield.

"The plague? Investigating use as possible bio-weapon? No, too many guns, not enough data equipment. Soldiers, not scientists."

"Whoa, okay!" Shepard stopped him with a raised hand. "Take a breath, would ya? I came here to find _you_. I'm Commander Shepard and I need your help for a critical mission."

"Mission? What mission?" The salarian asked, sounding excited, then abruptly changed his mind. "No. To busy. Clinic understaffed. Plague spreading too fast. Who sent you?"

It took Shepard a second to realize he'd asked her a question at the end of his hyperactive jabber.

"Ever hear of an organization called Cerberus?" She asked. She had no doubt he had, but she didn't want to come right out and ask an alien to join a pro-human group without being polite.

"Crossed paths on occasion," Mordin answered with narrowed eyes. His speech slowed enough now that she could understand him. He didn't sound too happy about his experiences with Cerberus. Shepard didn't blame him.

"Thought they only worked with humans. Why request salarian aid?" Mordin shrugged.

"The Collectors are kidnaping entire human populations. We'er going to find out why, and stop them."

Mordin put his hand to his chin in thought, supporting his arm by the elbow with is opposite hand. His eyes fell to the floor as he concentrated.

"Collectors, interesting. Plague engineered. Collectors one of only groups with technology to design it. Our goal may be similar."

His gaze regarded Shepard for a few seconds, then returned to the console.

"But, must stop plague first. Already have a cure. Need to distribute it at environmental control center. Vorcha guarding it." He glanced over his shoulder to the Commander, "Need to kill them."

On the heels of his words the circulation fans quit spinning over head. The background noise of the engines powering the fans hummed to silence. Dust fell out of the fan directly over Mordin's console. Mordin activated his omni-tool and began a systems check of the area.

"What the hell was that?" Taylor asked.

"Vorcha have shut down environmental systems. Trying to kill everyone. Need to get power back on before district suffocates. Here, take plague cure. Also, bonus in good faith, weapon from dead blue suns mercs May come in handy against vorcha."

Mordin handed her two vials of blue liquid and a sidearm, a Canifex Pistol. She took it gladly. It was a nice weapon, better than what she had.

"One more thing, Daniel, one of my assistants. Went into vorcha territory looking for victims. Hasn't come back."

"I'll keep an eye out for him. I'll help him if I can." Shepard promised. "Let's head to the environmental plant." She ordered her team and the left.

Vorcha and a few krogan tried to stop them from reaching their goal. It was a futile effort. They did indeed find Daniel on the way. He was being held captive by some angry batarians who thought he was there to spread the plague. Humans were generally blamed for the plague because, aside from vorcha who were thought to be do dumb to create the plague, humans were immune. Shepard tried to reason with them. She wasn't sure they were going to listen to her. She didn't want to shoot them, she would need her ammo for the vorcha. She'd wasted two to many as it was when she planted one in the head of the men she found looting the home of a turian who'd succumbed to the illness. To her relief the batarians let David go and left themselves without a fight. Shepard promptly sent David back to the clinic.

It was a steady fight to the control room. They discovered early on that they were more suseptible to fire, and it kept them from regenerating. Rather by accident, Shepard also discovered that a direct hit from an overload signal from an omni-tool made them explode. It was a interesting, if not useful, trick.

The doors to the environmental control room opened. A young vorcha ran up to them as if he were excited to see them. Shepard trained her weapon on his head, ready to fire when he started hissing at her.

"Bah! You no come here! We shut down machines, break fans! Everyone choke and die! Then Collectors make us strong!"

"They're not the brightest bunch, are they?" Shepard mused.

"You work for doctor! Put cure in air! We kill you fi..."

The vorcha's monologue was cut short by an inferno round to the head. He ended his statement with screams before his brain matter was consumed by fire. It didn't take long. Of course the other vorcha with him didn't take kindly to the persistence of the intruders. They retaliated with gunfire. The battle was short lived.

"Shepard," EDI hailed her on the com. "I've scanned the room. The central control system is in an alcove in the center of the back wall."

"I see it." She replied. It was hard to miss.

"You can inject the cure and re-initialize the systems there."

Shepard ran across the room, avoiding the dead by leaping over them. There was only one injection slot. The second vial must have been a back up. She entered the start up sequence and the central fan came to life above them. Unfortunately, so did the back up for the previous vorcha. Shepard took cover behind one of the concrete barriers that lined holes in the floor.

"I have located the fan controls." EDI announced. "There are two. One on either side of the room you are in now."

Shepard took note and fired on the vorcha trying to flank her position. Taylor took out the one on her right from behind a support beam. Lawson eliminated the one on the left from the opposite position to Taylor. Shepard took out her sniper and steadied it on the barrier. She took aim at one of the two vorcha with missile launchers over the exit. The vorcha may have been ugly and dumb, but they were quick sons-of-bitches. Her first shot missed, as well as the second. She found herself missing Garrus' expertise. She had every confidence that he would have already done the job and moved on. With the help of Taylor and Lawson they missile launchers lost the ability to be operated.

"I think we should split up. Lawson, you and Taylor take the left hall, I'll go right. Activate the fan as soon as you get to the controls. Meet me at the exit." Shepard ordered.

"Commander, I don't think it's wise to advance without back up." Lawson advised.

"I'm aware of the risk. That's why Taylor goes with you. Move out!" Shepard replied and left Miranda glaring after her. She understood Ms. Lawson's point, and why she may be a little protective of her 'project', but she had been doing this for a long time. Death wasn't going to change her training or battle knowledge though experience. She was a Spectre, and she could handle herself, by herself.


	11. Under Cover Fodder

A vorcha and a Krogan were ready for her at the bottom of the stairs. The walk way that would take her to the fan controls was likely to have more guarding it than just these two. She was still getting used to using the new biotics. They didn't always do what she'd intended to do. It made her feel like she was in biotics training all over again. She figured there would be some physical draw backs to being dead for so long. Having to deal with new biotic abilities didn't help matters. She attempted a warp arc and succeeded in knocking them both back down the stairs. Not exactly what she'd planed, but she made it work. She shot incendiary rounds into both of them. Behind her she could hear gunfire echoing from the other walk way. It sounded like Lawson and Taylor were making good progress.

Shepard made it about half way down the hall before falling into cover behind a support structure. Two vorcha with guns and one with a flame thrower were quickly moving in on her position. The took down the flame thrower first. He was closer than she thought he would be, or his flame reached further than she thought it would. Either way her shields were weakened to near nothing by the heat before the wielder lost enough brain matter to die. She ignited into flames of her own to knock down the other two. She used her omni-tool to overload the biological systems of one and unloaded her pistol into the face of the other. The fan on the opposite side of the room came to life on the heels of her last round. She ran for the controls and slammed her fist on the button. They collected spare ammo, heat sinks, and upgraded weaponry on the way back to the clinic. Hopefully David made it back without running into anything hostile that was still alive.

"Environmental systems engaged. Air born viral levels dropping. Patients improving. Vorcha retreating. Well done, Shepard. Thank you." Mordin said as she walked through the door. "Also, thank you for rescuing Daniel from batarians. Would have killed them myself."

"_Doctor_, how can you _say_ that? You believe in_ helping_ people!" Daniel said, surprised by the doctor's words.

"Sometimes heal patience, sometimes execute dangerous enemies. Either way helps."

"I'm going to go check on the patience." David said, a scowl on his features.

"Good, good. Think about what I said." Mordin suggested to him as he left. "A bit nieve, but bright future, I hope." He said to Shepard after David had left.

"Are you ready to leave?" Shepard asked.

"Yes. Unexpected t be working with Cerberus. Many surprises. Just need to finish up here at the clinic. Won't take long. Meet you at your ship." Mordin stopped his rapid speech to take a deep breath through his wide set nostrils, then opened his eyes and narrowed them at Shepard. "Looking forward to it."

"We're heading out. See you on the Normandy." Shepard nodded to the professor and left.

In passing the dead batarian on their way out, Shepard almost regretted letting him die... almost. She had known people who'd lost loved ones to slavery, abducted by batarians. It was hard to feel pity for them, even if the individual was not personally responsible. It was a prejudice she'd learned to have.

"Is everyone okay on ammo and weapons?" She asked the team.

"I'm good." Taylor answered with a nod.

"I have a full supply of ammo, Commander." Miranda replied.

"Good, 'cause we're going after Archangel." Shepard said and headed for Afterlife.

"Wait, don't you think we should rest? You shouldn't push yourself too hard, Shepard. You've only just been..."

"EDI," Shepard hailed the AI, cutting Miranda off. "What's the situation with Archangel?"

"I have accessed messages between mercenary groups regarding plans to deal with Archangel. There's a recruiting station at Afterlife."

"Thank you, EDI." Shepard said, narrowing her eyes at the woman glaring back at her.

"So, you see, Ms. Lawson, if we take a break 'Archangel' may suddenly become permanently unavailable for our mission. I'm sure a few minor repairs to my systems will be a small price to pay, should they be needed, for the life of a potential team member. But if _you_ need to take a nap," Shepard crossed her arms and gestured casually in the air, "by all means let me know and we'll take a breather on board the Normandy while the turian gets the bloody piss beat out of him by mercs."

"You've made you're point." Miranda replied curtly. She was beginning to regret not pushing for the control chip.

A Blue Suns batarian glanced up at her as she came down the ramp into the dark sunken room. She was guessing he liked what he saw when he smiled a little and let his gaze shift over to Miranda. Yep, he was getting at least one eye full.

"Well, aren't you sweet?" The batarian said. Shepard felt unbelievably dirty for reasons she couldn't begin to describe. It was as if the merc was mentally removing her armor and having his way with her.

"You're in the wrong place, honey. Strippers quarters are that way." The batarian motioned dismissively with one hand. His main eyes returned to the console in front of him. He let his secondaries ogle the female strippers, until the one in armor pulled a gun.

"You show me yours, tough guy. I bet mine's bigger." Shepard mockingly admired her weapon.

"Impressive, so you're here to fight then?" He asked. She had his 'full attention' now.

"If this is the place to go after Archangel." Shepard replied, clipping her weapon back onto her armor.

"This is the place...You three look like you could do some damage." he replied.

The batarian quickly went over the details of payment and where to go. Shepard didn't need to know everything. She didn't want to look at the batarian any longer than she had to, or let him look at her with that second set of eyes either. As she left for her under cover mission as target practice, a human male passed her in brightly colored civilian clothes. He couldn't have been more than 18, if that.

"Hey, is this where I sign up?" He asked excitedly. He had that 'I'm tough' attitude Shepard found so amusing in young males.

"You look a little young to sign up as a merc." She commented over her shoulder.

"I'm old enough. I grew up on Omega. I know how to handle a gun." He verbally beat his chest.

"So does Archangel." Taylor interjected.

"I can handle myself." The boy brought out his new piece to show off. "Besides, I just spent 50 creds on this pistol, and I wanna _use_ it."

Any weapon that cost 50 credits was a piece all right. A piece of shit, and Shepard knew it. She crossed the space between them in seconds and grabbed the kid by the collar, distracting him as she took the gun.

"Get your money back." She ordered, then slammed her palm against the clip ejector, breaking the rounds inside like the toy it was.

"Hey! What're you..."

"You'll thank me latter." She assured him, and casually left the room.

She was all too aware that she left him disappointed that he wouldn't be able to join the mercs, and pissed off at her for being the source of his malcontent. But, if he was smart, he'd realize she'd just saved his life. If not, then she would probably end up having to shoot him in the back.

Talking with the merc bosses was like talking to dumb, angry teenagers. They all had self fulfilling reasons to want Archangel dead. Shepard got all the information she could. Most of it was of little, if any, use. The mercs would come in waves by affiliation and they had a heavy mech. She sabotaged the mechs FOF systems to help tip the odds in her, and thusly Archangel's, favor.

Then there was the gunship. It was currently under repair by a batarian. That meant it wasn't fully operational and perhaps structurally unsound. If she was going to prevent the repairs from being completed, she would have to take out the tech.'Sargent' Cathka turned his back to her during their conversation after receiving word that the merc bands were ready to go. He conveniently left his soldering iron out. He was either stupid or too trusting of hired guns. It wasn't a question he would get to ponder later. Shepard took hold of the handle and strode casually over to the sargent as he bent over some control units. He glanced up at her when he became aware of her presence next to him.

"You're workin' too hard."

It was the last words he would ever hear as Shepard shoved the electric welder in between his armor and his under weave. The electric shock that sent him writhing to his death fired his his eyes to shriveled up raisins and melted his brain until it oozed out of his nose and eye sockets.

This 'Archangel' kept impressing her. How the turian and his team had managed to piss off every major merc gang on Omega was beyond her. After the mercs decided to work together, they took down his team and he was holding them off single handedly. Apparently he had been doing so for days already. She liked him, and they hadn't even met.A part of her hoped it was Nihlus, gone rouge against the frustrations of the Council. The though moved her feet a little faster.


	12. Archangel

"Archangel?" Shepard asked as she entered the room, weapon raised.

The turian in blue armor motioned for her silence and patience with the wave of one talon. A few seconds later he pulled the trigger on his sniper rifle, shooting merc hiding behind a column through the head. He stood, using his rifle for support, and took off his helmet. He lay the helmet on a table and sat down casually on the arm of a near by sofa, propping one foot up on another. The look of surprise on Shepard's face told him how happy she was that he was alive. The fact that _she_ was alive was still sinking in.

It was possible she was a clone, but it wasn't likely that a clone would move exactly like the genuine article. Shepard's mannerisms just couldn't be duplicated. When he'd seen her hop over the barrier with the other mercs, he'd thought she was just another merc. Then, when she shot one in the back his opinion changed. His heart rate quickened when he heard her voice behind him.

"Shepard. I thought you were dead." His words sounded as tired as he felt.

"Garrus!"

Shepard threw her arms out wide. She couldn't believe it. The nut who'd gathered such a force against him was her old team mate and friend. Maybe he could tell her something about Nihlus.

"What are you doin' here?"

"Just keeping my skills sharp. A little target practice." Garrus gestured weakly with one hand.

"You okay?" Shepard's brow knitted with concern.

"Been better. It sure is good to see a friendly face." He nodded to her. "Killing mercs is hard work... especially on my own." The memory of the death of his team could be heard heavily in the last words.

"Since when did you start calling yourself 'Archangel'?" She asked, intrigued.

"It's just a name the locals gave me for...all my good deeds." He shrugged. "I don't mind it," he chuckled, "but please... it's," he cleared his throat, "just 'Garrus' to you."

His throat felt dryer than usual. It was odd to see her after so long, and she was sans Nihlus, unless the Spectre was on whatever ship she'd arrived in. The other two humans she was with looked like the space faring type. The insignias on their uniforms didn't illude him. Why Shepard was with Cerberus was a question that would have to wait.

"What are you doing out here on Omega?" Shepard asked.

"I got fed up with all the bureaucratic_ crap_ on the Citadel." He flexed his mandibles. "Figured I could do more good on my own. At least it's not hard to find criminals here. All I have to do is point my gun and shoot." He scoffed, glancing down at the barrel of his rifle.

"Good to see you haven't lost your since of humor." She grinned at him.

The expression warmed him. It was almost worth everything just to see her alive and grinning at him. It was good to see a friend.

"Well, we got here. I don't think gettn' out will be as easy." Shepard said, unintentionally interrupting his thoughts. She took a step toward him.

"No, it won't." He nodded, leaving the sofa to go to the window. "That bridge has saved my life... funneling all those witless idiots into scope. But it works both ways. They're slaughter us if we try to get out that way."

Garrus and Shepard stood side by side looking out over the way she'd come in. Being by her felt right.. Here she was, saving his ass, getting ready to shoot things and blow stuff up. Just like the old days. But none of it would matter if they didn't survive this.

"So we just sit here and wait for them to come kill us?" Asked Lawson.

"It's not all _that _bad." Said Garrus. "This place has held them off so far, and with the three of you..."

He looked to Shepard. It was almost like breathing to slip into submission and let her take over. He still saw her as his commander, even now.

"I suggest we hold this location, wait for a crack in the defenses, then take our chances. It's not a perfect plan, but it's a plan." Garrus said.

He made eye contact with her. She was ready. Her features stern. It steeled his own resolve. In that moment it was as if she'd never died and had been with him, there, on Omega, from the beginning.

"How'd you let yourself get into this situation?" Shepard asked

"My feelings got in the way of my better judgment. It's a long story." He reloaded his gun. "I'll make you a deal. You get me outta here _alive_, and I'll tell you the whole damn thing."

"There numbers won't help them in here. We'll work together and then we'll share a drink on the new Normandy." She said grinning. It was easier to do now that she'd found a friend.

"A new Normandy, hu?" Garrus nodded. "Let's go see what the mercs're up to." He held the scope on his rifle up to his eye.

"Hmmmm... looks like they know their infiltration team failed. Take a look." He said, handing her the rifle. "Scouts. Eclipse, I think."

Shepard looked through the scope. LOKI mechs were hopping the barrier. She focused on the head of one and fired. The mech's head exploded and it crumpled to the ground.

"More than scouts." She said and handed the weapon back to Garrus. "One less now, though."

"Indeed." He nodded. She impressed him with the shot, but it didn't surprise him. The fact that the recoil didn't rip her arm off, did. There was more to _this_ Shepard than met the eye.

"We'd better get ready." Garrus suggested as he shifted his weight, focusing. "I'll stay up here. I can do a lot of damage from this vantage point. You..." He glanced at her. "You can do what you do best." He flashed her a grin. "Just like old times, Shepard."

Garrus took his position by a column for cover. Shepard was a few meters from him next to another. Miranda and Taylor took to the stairs and the lower floor. If anything got past Garrus and Shepard's fire, it would be up to them.

"Let's give these bastards everything we've got." Garrus said as he preped a concussive shot.

He was glad she was alive. It seemed an intervention of the fates that she had come for him, though his identity had been a mystery, even to his vigilante team. Perhaps she was sent to help him deliver justice to the one who had betrayed him. Then Garrus thought of someone he hand't thought of for nearly a year. Nihlus would come for her when he found out she was alive, though the Spectre had fallen far from what he had been two years ago. Sonya may find she no longer desired to be with him. It was a worrisome thought. The idea that her heart may end up broken, was not one he cared to entertain. He didn't like thinking of his Commander and his friend being weak or injured, but Nihlus was a weak spot in her. He just hoped that the weak spot was as strong as he hoped it was, for both their sakes.


	13. Omega

Anderson had sent out a message for Shepard. If she was alive, and with Cerberus, she would get the request for her return to the Citadel. Anderson could afford to be patient, but Nihlus wasn't going to wait around for her to show up. She wasn't Anderson's bond mate. It wasn't Anderson's guilt. Anderson did not feel the pain of the void she left as he did. He had to mourn her in secret. He had to hide his suffering and go on as if she were only a colleague, at best. His loss was deeper. He had dishonored her in death. He'd become less than he was. He'd done things... he would not have even considered before. He was not proud of the turian he had become. If Sonya was out there, if she was alive, he had to find her. He could only hope that she remembered him, that she still loved him, and that she would forgive him. He could be the man he was, if it was for her.

Nihlus boarded a merchant ship heading for Omega. He used his Spectre status to procure free passage for the journey. The elcor did not seem to mind as much as he thought they would. However, he quickly learned that _he_ minded. The elcor that had arranged for his passage was a particularly chatty one. It was going to be a long 48 hours.

"Curious. What takes you to Omega, Spectre?" Echeron asked.

"I don't mean to be un-appreciative, but my business is my own." Nihlus replied.

"Polite apology. I did not mean to offend. Explanation. I was trying to have conversation. We do not often have the pleasure of company on our trips. The stories of the others have been shared many times."

"I'm sorry you're bored, but I have no stories I can share with you." Nihlus refused him again.

"Stubborn persistence. I disagree. You have spoken of one called 'Sonya' in your dreams. Presumptuous conjecture. Is it a female you seek?"

"I talk in my sleep?" Nihlus asked, mostly to himself. Then he glared angrily at the elcor. "Why were you watching me sleep?"

"Corrective apology. I only heard you speak her name in passing. Defensive. I was not spying on you." Echeron replied honestly.

Nihlus eyed the elcor. It would be rather difficult for an elcor to be sneak up on him in his sleep, and unlikely that his dreams would be of much interest to the merchant. He decided that Echeron was telling the truth.

"I am looking for Commander Shepard, to establish the validity of the rumors. Have you heard anything on your routes?"

"Regretful reply. I have heard the rumors of which you speak, but nothing on her location. I wish I could be of more help to you."

"You have done enough by taking me to Omega. I have a feeling that it will only be the first step."

Nihlus' instinct for what lay ahead did not fail him. His skills that made him a Spectre had not dulled with his grief. If he wanted to find the answers he was seeking quickly, there was one person he could go to, if she was in a good mood that day. Aria. Bits of conversation in the bar lead him to believe that something big had gone down recently. The local merc bands had joined forces against someone called 'Archangel'. It didn't sound like they had archived their goal.

Nihlus climbed the stairs to Aria's balcony, ignoring the protests of the guard. He was stopped by more, at gun point, when he reached her 'throne room'. Nihlus didn't bother reaching for his own weapon.

"That's close enough." Aria said, barely turning her head over her shoulder.

The guards lowered there guns when Aria tipped her head. A batarian guard activated his omni-tool and started scanning Nihlus.

"Stand still."

"If you're looking for weapons, I'll save you the trouble. I'm armed." Nihlus glared at the multi-eyed alien.

"You can't be too careful." Aria answered. "I've already had a dead Spectre reeking havoc. I can't have a live one finishing what she left behind, or is that why you're here?" Aria said coyly.

"He's clear." Said the batarian and moved aside.

Nihlus took two steps toward the rather attractive asari. Her facial markings were unique. It was something that would define her in his memory. Aria sat down and offered him the seat next to her with a sweep of her hand. Nihlus took a seat on a separate sofa. Aria grinned at his tenacity.

"A Spectre like you doesn't come to Omega to buy illegal weapons or conduct questionable investigations. So, why are you in Omega?" Aria asked calmly.

"You already know why. The other Spectre, what can you tell me? What happened?" Kryik asked.

"Has she gone rouge? Is that why you're after her?" Aria asked back.

"No. I just need to find her." Kryik answered curtly.

"I can't tell you much. She failed to check in when she arrived on her shiny new ship. Something I hope I won't have to reprimand her for. I _can_ tell you the caused quite a stir with the local mercs and down in the quarantine zone. It seems she helped the good doctor cure the sector while ridding Omega of most of it's vorcha infestation. She also rescued the turian the mercs were after. Shepard has made quite a few enemies on Omega."

"What was the name of the ship?" Nihlus asked.

His heart pounded in his chest. Shepard was alive and she had been on Omega. But why was she rescuing alie... She's was building a team. She was on a mission.

"Normandy. And before you ask, I don't know where they heading next." Aria answered

"Did she have others with her?"

"Yes, I believe they worked for Cerberus. They had the insignia on their uniforms."

He needed to find out where she might have gone next. If she _was_ building a team and _was_ in fact on some sort of mission for Cerberus, he had to find out why, and what the mission was. She wouldn't work with Cerberus without a damn good reason, right? Now that he knew she was alive, and on a new Normandy, presumably a 'gift' for Cerberus, why hadn't she contacted him? How long had she been resurrected? Maybe she'd forgotten him.

"Are we done here?" Aria interrupted his thoughts. "I can't have spectres running around. It's bad for business, you understand."

"Yes, thank you." Nihlus stood and offered her a half bow.

Minutes later he was on a 'borrowed' shuttle from a batarian frigate. They had two in the hangar bay. They needed to train their security better, or pay them more. They piratically gave him the shuttle for a few hundred credits. He left the astroid belt and then floated in space above the debris for a while. He consulted the star charts in the shuttles computer, wondering where she might go next. She'd picked up a doctor and a lawless gun. Who would she be after next? The last time she helped put a team together they had picked up a krogan. Where better to find one than Tuchanka. Nihlus set the coordinates and jumped into FTL.


	14. Woky

The ruin of Tuchanka raced past the view ports of the shuttle, UT2-007 Woky. Nihlus had never seen a world full of so much destruction. He shook his head.

"It was the right choice to create the genophage, or the rest of the galaxy might look like this." He thought to himself.

The shuttle landing tube was poorly marked in the dusty wind by a tattered flag turned brown with filth. The lack of dirt and rock pelting the shuttle was noticeable as the shuttle slowly lowered down the tube to hover and finally settle on the grim cover landing pad. He noticed a Blood Pack recruiter off to one side as he exited the shuttle. The recruiter glared at him as he descended the stairs. The door guards blocked his path, the Lieutenant in charge stepped toward him. Nihlus didn't even blink.

"The clan leader will see you." He eyed Kryik with venom. "Watch your step, turian. Stray too far and your welcome will be short lived."

"Duly noted." Kryik answered, matching the krogan's venom. "I have business to attend to."

Spectre Kryik pushed passed the angry krogan and through the door way before the steel door was completely removed. He wasn't unaware of the stairs and silent threats he received from the other krogan. He had one question to ask, then he would be on his way. The place stank of rot and filth. The musk of unwashed krogan and varren dung from the fighting pits stung his eyes and burned in his nose. He wondered if the female camp was just as vile.

"Halt!"

A guard stopped him on the staggered slabs of concrete. He could see the 'throne' made of similar debris. A krogan with a ruddy face plate sat on it listening to one at his feet that seemed perturbed about something.

"You must wait until the clan leader summons you. He is... in talks."

Behind the guard the krogan speaking paced in front of the clan leader. The red plated one noticed him. The defining scars down the krogan's face gave away his identity. Wrex was the can leader.

"Guard!" Wrex shouted, "Let him approach."

The guard grumbled under his breath and moved aside, glaring at Kryik as he passed.

"Nihlus," Wrex greeted the turian as he neared the steps to his throne. "What brings you to Tuchanka?"

"Shepard is alive. She's putting a team together. Has she passed through here?" Kryik said, very to the point.

"Hummm... Shepard's resurrection is not a sign of gentle change. I hear little of the galaxy beyond krogan space. My attentions have been occupied with our own issues, but I would know if Shepard had come to Tuchanka. She has not."

"Thank you for your time." Kryik offered a half bow and turned to leave.

"Nihlus," Wrex called to him.

Kryik halted without turning to the clan leader, tilting his head slightly in the krogan's direction.

"If she does come to Tuchanka, I will tell her you are searching for her. Is there anything message you would leave for her?"

Kryik thought a moment. He hadn't considered leaving a bread crumb trail for her. He assumed he would always be on her tail, following her path through the stars. What could he say? What would he say when he found her? The pain that still haunted him clouded the love he'd once felt for her. Now it was tainted with guilt and bitterness.

"Tell her..." He glared down at the pebbles at his feet, then closed his eyes. Whatever her mission, it took precedence over their reunion. "Tell her not to wait for me. I will find her."

"Very well." Wrex nodded.

He watched the turian walk away and disappear from view into the hall leading to the landing pad. He was changed. The fire of life had gone from his eyes. He wondered if the now living Shepard had changed as much from her death as her mate had. It was not his concern, but Shepard had once been one he called 'friend'. The news of her return struck a cord in him. It seemed there remained a looming threat to the galaxy on the horizon.

* * *

Shepard paced in the com room waiting for an update on Garrus' condition. In the privacy of it's walls she walked around the console table with her hands clasped behind her back. As much as she was worried about Garrus, she thought about Nihlus.

She'd received a messages from _Councillor_ Anderson. He wanted her to report to the Citadel to speak with the Council. There was also a special mission concerning the Normandy's crash sight. They wanted her to collect any ID tags of crew members she found there as well as place a memorial at the sight. It seemed fitting that the Commander of the ship be the one to have the honor. Convincing the Council to agree to making the monument had taken nearly a year and a half.

The resurfacing memories of Nihlus were almost as bad as remembering the experience of her death. She blinked back the tears. It was possible Nihlus was on the Citadel. Her apprehension of what she may find when she arrived had prevented her from setting course. Her heart felt heavy and ached in her chest. Her shoulders, her back... it all ached as if she were constantly carrying the weight of worlds. In a way, she was.

The door hissed open. Taylor took the side of the table opposite her and leaned over a console. Shepard matched his behavior looking hard at his face for any clue of the news he brought. His somber expression set a knot in her stomach.

line

Garrus opened his eyes, groggy from the anesthesia. His vision was blurry, but come into focus quickly. There was an older, grey haired woman in the room. Her uniform suggested she was the doctor. He groaned when he tried to sit up.

"Don't try to sit up just yet. You took a direct hit from a missile, you should be dead." She sounded impressed.

"Turians make armor to last." He tired to joke. Talking hurt. "So, how bad is it?"

"You'll be fine. You just need some time." Dr. Chakwas said.

Garrus' eyes grew wide when he suddenly recognized Chakwas.

"What are you doing here, with Cerberus I mean?" Garrus asked.

"It's a long story, but I'll tell you what I told the commander. I don't work for Cerberus. I work for Shepard." She replied with a smile.

"Good enough for me." He flashed a toothy smile back

"Okay, well..." He forced himself to sit. "I'd better go see the Commander."

Chakwas tried to ease him back onto the med-bed, but he wasn't going to give up, so she helped him to his feet.

"Take it easy! You should be on bed rest for at least a week." Chakwas shook her head at him.

"I'll be fine." He nodded, "Thanks doc." He tried to smile, but that hurt too, so he nodded again. That hurt less.

Each step felt like he was going to break something as he made his way slowly to the elevator. The new Normandy was an updated version of the original. It seemed a bit roomier to boot. He liked the extra head space. On the Command Deck, a young red haired woman looked at him when he exited the elevator. She seemed very concerned, or scared. Maybe both. He'd seen only humans thus far. It was possible he was the only alien on board. He approached her as professionally as he could manage.

"Can you tell me where Commander Shepard is?" he asked, very aware that the deeper tones of the flanging of his voice were amplified in the quiet of the deck.

"She's in the com room waiting for an up date on your status... are you okay?" She smiled sweetly at him.

"Uh, thanks. I'm fine. Where's the com room?" Garrus took a nervous step back.

"It's just around the corner, you can go through the armory and it's in the hall." Kelly answered.

She was still smiling. Her bright green eyes were eerily similar to Nihlus'. It gave him the creeps, like the turian was watching him through her.

"Okay. Thanks." He nodded and moved as quickly as he dared the doors of the armory.

The armory was much bigger than the old Normandy. A lot of things about this Normandy were bigger and better, updated. He wondered what her guns were like. He took the only other door in the room to the hall. He could vaguely here a male human voice.

"The doc's corrected with surgical procedures and some cybernetics. Best we can tell, he'll have full functionality but..."

He decided not to let the man finish his sentence. He wasn't about to let anyone tell Shepard that Vakarian weak in _any_ form.

"Shepard." Garrus called to her as the doors hissed open. He stood with his body profiled to the room, strong and proud as ever. His eyes locked on her like a target.

Sonya turned toward Garrus and smiled as she crossed her arms and shifted her weight to her hip. She could see most of his face, what was left of it. The side that had taken the hit was bandaged and badly scared. She felt bad for not being there for him. For not preventing it from happening. But she was glad he would be okay, and he was alive.

"Tough son of a bitch." Taylor chuckled. "Didn't think he'd be up yet."

Seeing Shepard smile made the pain fade enough that he felt himself again. He strode toward her with confidence, then stopped at a professional distance of a meter or two away from her. He didn't trust the other human, the one with the Cerberus logo on his uniform.

"Nobody would give me a mirror," he shrugged. "How bad is it?" He pointed to his face with one talon.

"Ah, hell, Garrus. You were always ugly." She teased him. "Slap some face paint on there and no one will even notice."

Garrus' mandibles spread in a smile as he laughed roughly. He could feel the tendons straining.

"Ah, ha..! Don't make me laugh, damn it. My face is barely holdin' together as it is." He regained his composure and tried to look suave. "_Some_ women find facial scars _attractive_," He paused gesturing to her. "Mind you, _most_ of those women are... krogan." He offered a grin.

Sonya smiled and shook her head. Taylor sensed some tension and decided he should leave. He saluted Shepard and left the room without making further eye contact with anyone. Garrus stepped aside to let him by. He waited until Taylor had left the room to say anything more.

"Frankly, I'm more worried about you. Cerberus, Shepard? You remember those sick experiments they were doing?" Garrus said, looking at his friend with sincere concern.

"That's why I'm glad you're here, Garrus." She uncrossed her arms. "If I'm walking into hell, I want someone I trust at my side." She looked him in the eye. They seemed bluer than she remembered.

"You _realize_ this plan has _me_ walkin' into hell _too_." He took a few casual steps toward her and cocked his head and laughed lightly. "Just like old times."

He paused for a moment, regarding her as she stood a few feet away from him. He had so many questions for her, but perhaps now was not the time. He had a feeling they would get a chance to talk latter. Besides, he could tell she was tired. She kept shifting her weight from foot to hip. It was a tell of her exhaustion. Even after two years, he still knew her better than most. She hadn't changed at all while everyone else had evolved with time. He thought again of Nihlus. He would have to warn her. It was his duty to her as a friend to prepare her as best he could for the changes she would find in her mate. But that too would have to wait.

"I'm fit for duty whenever you need me, Shepard. I'll settle in and see what I can do at the forward batteries." Garrus nodded and turned to leave, pushing everything else aside.

That night Shepard coulnd't sleep. She still found it hard to believe that she had actually died, fallen to an alien world, her remains recovered, pieced back together, and re-animated like some revamped Frankenstein vid. And by Cerberus of all things, just so the Illusive Man could have her as his pet. Something wasn't right. The pieces, as it were, didn't fit together.

And Garrus was back on her team. It gave her hope of finding the rest of them, of finding Nihlus. the thought brought back her grudge against the missing scars, but she couldn't very well confront Cerberus about them without revealing sensitive information. They didn't need more power over her than they already had.

Sonya rubbed her forehead and tried to sleep. Her chest felt like it had when the universe was sucking the air from her body. Her heart _hurt_. It wasn't just an ache or a heaviness. It was damn near unbearable physical pain. She knew it was in her head, her emotional state, but that didn't help the agony subside. She buried her face in her pillow to stifle the sounds of her weeping. Her body shuddered with the weight of her loneliness and a thousand other thoughts and emotions that threatened to cripple her.


	15. An Old Crew Mate

Nihlus sat in the Woky in orbit around Tuchanka. He'd missed her at Omega, and jump the gun on Tuchanka, if she was ever going to head there in the first place. Where could she be? Where would she go?

He slammed his fist into the dash of the shuttle out of frustration. His fingers were curled so tightly his talons dug into his flesh. His whole body shuddered with rage. His anger was with himself. Why was he even trying? He wasn't worthy of her, or anyone, anymore... if he ever had been. He'd thrown himself into the gutter to burry his grief, but it hadn't worked. It only made it worse. What kind of man was he now? What kind of mate was he? She deserved better.

Saren's words still nibbled at the edges of his sanity. 'Have you lost your way so irreparably that you've taken a human as your bond mate?' He had lost his way because he'd lost the human he cared so deeply about. Saren never cared about carrying on his line or love. How could he understand? But the seed of doubt had been sewn. Was he only with her because she accepted him? Plenty of asari were willing to have him, a few other humans as well... but no turian female would even been seen talking with him for more than a few seconds. He would forever be an outsider to his own kind. But he'd _chosen_ Sonya. He wasn't _settling_, he_ loved _her. He didn't care what her_ species_ was. Why should that matter? Why should anything matter but the person, the spirit and the soul?

Nihlus took a deep breath to clear his mind. He wanted to be with her. If he didn't, he wouldn't be floating out in space in a shuttle. He would let her make the choice, clinging to the hope of her forgiveness. He could check in with Alenko on Horizon. If there was nothing there then perhaps Illium would hold some answers. He wanted to check in with T'Soni anyway. He punched in the coordinates for Horizon and confirmed the jump.

Alenko met Kryik at the landing pad with a firm and shake and a subtle grin. He was glad to see his old crew mate, but nervous about the presence of a Spectre at the colony. The new defense guns weren't operational, and that could be the reason the Council sent the turian. But that didn't seem like a probable explanation for Kryik's unannounced arrival. There had to be more to it.

"Welcome to Horizon, Spectre." Alenko greeted him.

"I apologize for arriving un-scheduled, but I'm not here as a Spectre." Kryik said firmly. "Has anyone else unexpected contacted you or the colony recently?"

"That sounds like a mission related question. Are you sure the Council didn't send you?" Alenko asked suspiciously.

"I am here on my own, Kaiden." Kryik addressed him informally to make his point.

"Okay. No, no one but you has arrived that wasn't expected. No one unusual."

"Thank you. I'll be leaving then." Kryik turned to leave.

"Wait, aren't you at least going to stay to rest or eat? Let me top off your fuel or..._ something_." Kaiden insisted.

"Why are you so eager to help me?"

"You look tired and I don't want to hear anymore bad news." Kaiden explained. "And it's good to see a familiar face, one that doesn't stare through me."

"Are the colonists upset with you?"

"Not exactly. It's more like they're upset with the Alliance. And they're nervous about the abductions along the boarder. To be honest, I'm a little worried myself. And I can't seem to figure out what's wrong with the AA guns."

"Abductions?" Kryik asked.

"You haven't heard? Whole human colonies have gone missing. The people are just gone! Like they just vanished into thin air. Officially the incidents are being reported as terrorist or pirate attacks. That's why I'm here working on the AA guns. But unofficially the Alliance thinks it's the geth. The Council doesn't want to talk about the issue. Anderson is trying to change their minds, but..."

"When did the abductions start? Did the other colonies send out a distress call? Was there any signal that they were being attacked?"

"I think you should come with me. I'll have the boys fill up your tank while we talk in more private quarters."

Kryik agreed and followed Alenko to his pre-fab. He noticed a few female items, such as a vase of flowers in the window. Kaiden answered the question before Nihlus could ask it.

"I share this space with the doctor. She and I are..." He trailed off, trying to think of a polite way to explain the relationship.

"I don't need to know." Kryik stopped him. "I do need to know more about these abductions."

Kryik took a seat on the sofa opposite Alenko. The two men leaned over the low table toward each other so as to keep the conversation at a low volume.

"A couple months ago the Alliance stopped receiving transmissions from one of our colonies on the edges of Citadel space. When we decided to send a team to investigate there was no one there. When it happened again, they assumed it was geth. They don't want to launch a massive investigation and cause more panic, but they're unsure what to do about the problem. It's like Eden Prime all over again, but without the destruction of the buildings. That's why they're installing or upgrading the AA guns at remaining colony sites like this one."

Kaiden kept his eyes on the turian as he briefly explained everything. His curiosity about the Spectre's personal mission grew when the turian broke eye contact at the mention of Eden Prime.

"I hope that helps you in whatever it is you're doing. Are you sure you can't tell me who you're looking for?"

"Shepard." Kryik answered, suddenly.

"What?" Kaiden asked in disbelief. "I'm sorry, Nihlus. I am, but Shepard's, dead. Her remains are probably still on that frozen world where we were attacked."

"She's alive. Ce... " Kryik glanced back to Kaiden. It probably wouln't be a good idea to tell him about Cerberus. "Someone either cloned her or rebuilt her somehow. I'm not sure. But I know she's alive. I'm trying to find her."

"How can she be alive? It's been two years!" Kaiden almost shouted. He stood up and started pacing the room.

"Now you know why I didn't want to tell you. Look, if she does come here... She's looking for people to join her team. She's on some sort of mission. She may come here to recruit you, if she knows you're here. I've more questions than I have answers. I'm sorry, but I should go. Thank you for the fuel and the information."

"Of course." Alenko answered distractedly as he stood with his chin pinched between thumb and forefinger.

Kryik stood and headed for the door. He had overlooked Alchera. It was possible that Shepard would visit the crash site. He decided to head there next instead of Illium. Liara would still be there along with whatever information she may have. He wanted to find out as much as he could on his own first.


	16. The Citadel Draweth Nigh

The next morning Sonya decided to go to the Citadel. She wanted to see her 'father' and she needed to alert the Council and the Alliance that she was, in fact, alive. There would be questions that she wouldn't want to answer, but she would just have to deal with that. And if Nihlus was there... Her heart skipped a beat at the thought. For a second it was hard to breath. Her last moments with him were intense and intimate before the destruction of their home began and they were spaced. For her, it had only been a couple weeks. For him, two years had passed. She assumed he would have mourned her in traditional turian fashion, but would he have replaced her? Would he want to continue where they left off? She could understand that he would need time to adjust to her return, but there were so many unknowns.

The engineers had been very grateful for the upgraded parts. They even invited her to play skillian five. She agreed, happy for the distraction. Unfortunately for Ken, she was very good at skillian five back in the day. She may have been a little rusty, but she still managed to win 500 credits. It was a close call though. If Ken had called her bluff, it would've been over. Shepard allowed herself a smirk as she sat in the mess staring at the bottle of ice brandy she picked up for the Doctor on Omega. David had taught her well, with frequent games of poker, the subtleties of keeping a strait face.

"What's the smirk for?" Garrus asked as he sat down across from the Commander.

"Hu? Oh! Uhm, nothing." Shepard answered, distractedly.

"Are you going to drink that brandy all on your own?" Garrus asked, teasing.

"No." Sonya scoffed. "I picked this up to replace the one the doc. lost on the old Normandy. I figured I could do that much.

"Hey, thanks for saving my ass back on Omega." Garrus said, his mandibles flashed her a grin. "I owe ya one."

"You don't owe me anything, Garrus." Sonya shook her head. "I didn't know it was you, but. I'm glad it was. The Illusive Man had told me you disappeared. The rest of the galaxy has no idea where you are, or _who_ you are, apparently... _Archangel_." She teased.

"Yeah, let's just keep that between us. Okay?" Garrus said, averting his eyes in mild embarrassment.

"Well, the mercs think _Archangel_ is dead. It's probably better that way." Sonya told him.

"That suites me just fine." Garrus replied.

Garrus studied her face for a moment. He'd briefly met Dr. Solus in passing. Everyone else was human. He confirmed his suspicions with Joker and Dr. Chakwas when he'd gone to greet the familiar faces. He wondered how much of the old team she would bring back together, and when Nihlus would join them.

"Commander," Garrus began, trying to craft his words carefully. "I noticed I'm the only turian aboard..."

"I haven't gone to see him yet." Sonya answered the question he was trying to ask. "I'm not even sure if he's on the Citadel, or what his reaction will be. I'm surprised _you_ took it so well." She gestured to him.

"I'll be honest, Shepard. The team didn't just fall apart after you were gone. The Council and the Alliance tore the old team to pieces and reassigned us to different ships or stations. I joined the turian military for a while." Garrus paused in thought of an ex-crew mate. "I... none of us took your death well."

He was thinking of his own struggle to cope. He'd lost friends in battle before. But loosing Shepard had been harder to deal with. She'd become the best friend he'd had since childhood, over time. Watching her die helplessly from the evac shuttle had been the hardest thing he'd had to endure, before the loss of his team on Omega.

"I'm sorry, Gar.."

"It wasn't your fault." Garrus cut her off.

He wasn't going to let her punish herself. Then the vertigo of dropping out of FTL settled over them. They had arrived. The count down to potential disaster had begun.

"Commander?" Joker's voice came over the com. "We'll be docking with the Citadel in about half an hour.

"Okay, thanks, Joker." Shepard nodded to the com.

"Well, I should go get ready. I guess the Doc. will have to wait for her brandy." Shepard laughed.

"Shepard,"

Garrus stopped her with a gentle touch on the back of her hand. It reminded her of the subtle touches Nihlus used to give her when he would say something to just her on missions. Her eyes darted to Garrus', almost expecting the bright green gems she'd come to miss more than breathing.

"I should warn you, as your friend, Nihlus... he may not be as you remember him. I know you've thought about that, but I don't think it'll be what you expect."

"I appreciate your concern, Garrus, but I'm a big girl."

Garrus flashed a grin. His mandibles fluttered as he tried to think of a way to put what he had to say gently without dropping the ball.

"I know. I have no doubts about your ability to handle the situation, but this isn't the battle field." He took her hand and gave it a squeeze. Her smaller, multiple fingers felt strange in his hand. It surprised him that something so delectate could be so strong.

"Nihlus took your death harder than any of us without the luxury of being able to express it. He..." Garrus trailed off, then sighed, giving up trying to explain it to her. "Just... don't let your guard down."

"Okay." Sonya nodded, concerned by the earnest expression on her friend's face. "Thanks, Garrus."

She put her free hand over the talons holding her other and gave them a little squeeze back. She hoped Nihlus would accept her back as readily and easily as Garrus had. He was a good friend. She was glad to have him as one.


	17. The Closest Thing To It

The Citadel wasn't quite as she remembered it. A lot had changed when they rebuilt it. It felt strange to see it all put to rights when, for her, only a few weeks had passed since the attack and most of the Presidium was still in ruin. There were still areas that were under minor reconstruction, but it was almost as if the battle had never occurred. The walls were pristine white. The tiled floors reflected the artificial sky like water. The lake was clear, sparkling blue, and the tress were as green as ever. Even the krogan statue had been restored. It occurred to her how much it had hurt her to see the trees burning when Saren and his geth attacked the Citadel. It soothed some of her anxiety to see them lush and green.

She climbed the steps to what used to be the Ambassador's office. It was now Councillor Anderson's office. It made her smile to think of Udina knocked down a notch and running around at Anderson's command instead of the other way around. She'd sent the Councillor a reply to his request the day before so he could set up the meeting. The reply sent back was surprisingly empty of the shock she expected. Maybe the fatherly hugs came latter.

The doors hissed open at her approach. Anderson was inside talking with hollo projections of the other Council members.

"Commander! We were just talking about you." Anderson greeted Commander Shepard with a polite grin and a hand shake.

"It's been a long time, Anderson. I hope the last couple years have treated you right." Shepard smiled back.

"There's been some rough spots." Anderson answered. He leaned in slightly, as if in a bow, "It's good to have you back." He said in a lower voice, allowing his paternal love to peek through the politics.

Sonya smiled a little more. It gave her a sense of security to know that death had not taken her father from her.

"We've heard many rumors surrounding you unexpected return." The Salarian Councillor interrupted, shifting his weight uncomfortably. "Some of them are... unsettling."

"We agreed to this meeting so you could explain your actions, Shepard. We owe you that much. After all you saved our lives in the battle against Saren and his geth." the Asari Councillor said.

"Saren wasn't the one commanding the geth. It was the Reaper, Sovereign." Shepard corrected.

"Ah yes. 'Reapers'," The Turian Councillor said sarcastically with one fingered air quotes. "The immortal race of sentient star ships allegedly waiting in dark space. We have dismissed that claim." He said, waving is hand at her as if she were jester who made a fool of herself.

It took Shepard a second to recover from the harsh words. Looking at the Councillor was almost like looking at Nihlus. There facial tattoos were the same, and seeing them for the first time since her resurrection made it difficult for her to focus. Anderson turned to her, interrupted her building angry retaliation.

"Shepard, no one else encountered the hologram on Ilos that told you the truth about the Reapers Only you and your crew ever spoke with Sovereign." Anderson steadied his gaze on his 'daughter'. "I believe you, but without evidence from another source, the others think Saren was behind the geth attacks."

"Go back to Ilos and talk to Vigil. Or just look at what's left of Sovereign. It's obvious the technology is more advanced than ours." Shepard told the Council.

"The hologram on Ilos is no longer functional." The Salarian Councillor said, giving Shepard a side long look. "And we have found nothing to suggest that Sovereign was _not_ a geth creation."

"The geth are capable of remarkable technological achievements. This is probably why Saren recruited them." The Asari added.

"This Reaper theory proves just how fragile your mental state is." The Turian said.

Shepard was ready to go find the physical representation of the Councillor and rip his fringe from his head. She clinched her fists and tried to remain calm. It's what Nihlus would have done. He used to whisper to her when he saw the tell of her fingers flexing, 'Just stay calm.' His breath on the back of her ear served as a reminder that he was there and everything would be okay. She tried to remember what it felt like.

"You have been manipulated." The Turian continued. "By Cerberus, and before then by Saren. And you've brought Vakarian down with you." He nodded to Garrus, standing a meter behind her.

"Saren was an organic. The geth would never accept him as their leader. They only followed him because he was Sovereign's agent!" Shepard said as calmly as she could manage.

"Saren was a compelling and charismatic individual. He convinced the geth the Reapers were real, just as he convinced _you_." The Asari countered with a pointed finger.

"It was all part of his plan." The Turian added. "The Reapers are just a myth. One you insist on perpetuating."

"We believe that you believe it, but that doesn't make it true." The Asari agreed.

"I kept Saren from _destroying_ the Citadel. I sacrificed _human_ lives to _save_ this Council! And as for Cerberus, they found my body and brought me back to life. I'm working _with_ them to investigate the _abduction_ of _human colonists_. Something _you_ are ignoring! " Shepard nearly shouted, stepping forward. She was at the edge of how much crap she was going to take.

"We are in a difficult position, Shepard." The Asari answered. "You are involved with Cerberus, an avowed enemy of the Council. This is treason, a capitol offense."

"That's too far!" Anderson jumped in, taking a step to Shepard's side. "Shepard is a hero! I'm on this Council too and I won't let this white wash continue." It was his turn to be angry.

"Maybe there is a compromise." The Asari said, lowering her arms that had gone up in a reflexive defense. "Not a public acknowledgment, given your ties, but something to show peripheral support."

"Shepard, if you keep a low profile and restrict your operations to the Terminus Systems, the Council is willing to offer you reinstatement as a Spectre." Said the Turian.

"What does that mean? Do I have to start filing reports?" Shepard asked, crossing her arms.

"That won't be necessary." The Salarian said, shaking his head. "This is a show of good faith on our part."

"We cannot become involved in an investigation concerning the missing colonies in the Terminus Systems. But Spectre reinstatement shows our support of you personally." The Asari added.

Shepard thought her tone sounded a little smug, but what could she do? Should she accept the offer? She looked to Anderson with the silent question. He nodded his support and Commander Shepard stepped forward. Behind her Miranda crossed her arms with a rather unhappy look on her face. Garrus looked on with interest. Shepard never ceased to surprise him.

"I accept your offer. It's good to have the Council on my side."

"Good luck with your investigation, Shepard." The Asari nodded. "We hope for a quick resolution , and a quick end to your relationship with Cerberus."

The Councillor terminated the link and the hollo images shifted, then vanished. Anderson took a few steps away then turned back to Shepard.

"Well, that went better than expected." He sighed. "You know their offer is just symbolic. They won't actually do anything."

"I don't expect them to help." Shepard said, "But Spectre status gives me access I may need. And it puts the SDA back in action."

Anderson regarded her for a moment. He'd hoped to put off the subject of Nihlus for a long as possible. It seemed that wasn't going to happen.

"Ture enough. Don't worry about the Council, or the Alliance. I'll find some way to keep them off your back. Shoudn't be too hard, as long as you keep to the Terminus Systems."

He was saved from having to go further when Udina walked through the doors. He hadn't told his assistant about Shepard's return.

"Anderson, we need to talk about.." Udina's eyes fell on the Spectre and he nearly choked on his words. "Shepard!" The shock on his face quickly fell into a scowl.

"What are_ you_ doing here?" Udina growled.

"I'm visiting friends and family. How have you been?" Shepard said with a huge grin of satisfaction at Udina's glower.

"Your return is a bureaucratic nightmare for us!" Udina seethed through bared teeth.

"I invited Shepard here to speak with the Council." Anderson defended her. "We just finished our meeting."

"You what?" Udina spat. "Councillor, do the words 'political shit storm' mean anything to you?"

"The Council reinstated my Spectre status." Shepard told Udina with a smirk. "They're just happy I'm staying out in the Terminus Systems."

"Yes, I can see how that arrangement works out best for both sides." Udina said with his chin on his thumb. Then he turned back to Anderson. "But you really shouldn't have taken a step like this _without_ consulting me first, Councillor."

"I don't answer to you, Udina." Anderson narrowed his eyes at his assistant. "Why don't you go to your office and think about that for a while." He ordered with his hands clasped behind his back.

"Of corse, Councillor. Good day, to both of you." Udina with practiced politeness.

Udina left the room like a dog with his tail tucked trying to look like a man of pride. Shepard and Vakarian exchanged amused glances. She couldn't keep the smirk from her face.

"Sorry about that." Anderson said, turning to Shepard. "Udina's never gotten over the fact that _I_ got the Council position instead of him. Sometimes I need to put him in his place."

"What do you keep him around for?" Sonya asked. She followed David to the balcony's half wall.

"He's got his uses. And if you want something done on the Citadel, he knows who can make it happen. Plus, he's always happy to attend all those formal diplomatic functions I can't be bothered with." Anderson finished by leaning on the railing.

"How have the last couple of years treated you?" Sonya asked.

"Serving on the Council isn't how I planed to spend my twilight years." David answered, walking away from her to look out over the Presidium.

His plans had involved a wife and possibly children, and grand children. Maybe even fishing planet side somewhere. But then the divorce happened, and there was the young blonde that Sonya sometimes reminded him of. Maybe it was for the best. He did have a daughter, of sorts. He supposed that was as close as he would get, now that he was nearing retirement age. He returned to Sonya, and the rail.

"Sometimes I feel like I'm just beating my head against a wall. Knowing the truth about Sovereign is brutal. It's nightmare stuff. I can't blame others for not wanting to believe it, but I know how important it is. So I keep trying. Fighting the good fight, right?"

"Forget Udina and the Council!" Sonya said, waving her hand as if to knock them from the air. "Join my team and help me stop the Collectors."

"I'm too old to go racing across the galaxy. 'Much as I complain, I've got an important job to do here. The front line... That's got to be yours." He grinned up at her.

"I'm surprised no one can tell Sovereign wasn't geth technology." Sonya mused. "Didn't they examine the wreckage?"

"We don't have much to look at. Pieces have been rained all over the station. It was chaos, with who knows how many species combing the wards for their dead. We secured as much of it as we could, but between the keepers and a whole lot of unauthorized salvage, there's no way to account for even half of that thing. Another reason they don't want to acknowledge what Sovereign was."

"Are we still fighting hold outs?"

"It's long since stopped being a war. If we hear of one we send out a team and take care of it. They're not the boogie men they used to be." David answered.

"What happened to Kaiden Alenko after the Normandy..."

"He's still with the Alliance, but he's working on a special mission. It's classified." He answered, "I can't say any more," Cutting her off before she could ask. "Not while you're with Cerberus. I'm sorry."

"Okay." Sonya relented.

She leaned on the rail next to her 'father' and folded her hands together, letting the uni-fist hand out over the edge. Then the question that he'd been dreading to answer came from her lips to his ears like a fork scratching on a plate.

"Can you tell me where Spectre Nihlus Kryik is?"

"Do you want the long answer, or the short one?" David stalled, glancing over to his 'daughter', knowing that the whole truth of the pas two years would likely break her heart.

"I'll take whatever you can tell me." She said softly.

David sighed heavily before answering, "I don't know where he is, but I know what he's doing. I tried to convince him to stay, and wait, but..." He looked her in the eye. He may as well be the one to tell her. It was better than hearing it from someone else. "He's gone looking for you."

"_What_? But how...When did he...?"

David cut her off with a raised hand. "He'll likely end up on Illium to speak with T'Soni, but he knows about your mission to the crash site. Where he's been between leaving here and going there I don't know, but Sonya... Be careful. It's been a long two years for him. He's not the same man he was."

"Everyone keeps saying that." Sonya said, clearly frustrated.

"Everyone who?" David asked, his brow knitted.

"Garrus tried to warn me too. What's going on? What happened?" She asked, unhooking her fingers and putting a hand over his. "Please, _tell me_."

"After you died, with the Normandy destroyed, the team was dissolved and everyone went there own way. Nihlus remained a Spectre. His grief never interfered with his duty. But when the day was done... he just wasn't the same. Everything in him fell apart. He started going to bars and clubs..." David trailed off, his heart breaking for Sonya. "Look, I shouldn't be the one telling you this. He has the right to tell you himself."

"David, I need to know. I don't like being kept in the dark."

"Some things are better left in the dark, at least for a while. He still love you, Sonya. He wouldn't be out there looking for you if he didn't. Keep that in mind when you find him. He's still a good man."

"I'm surprised you're not trying to convince me to move on or find a human mate, if Nihlus is so far gone." Sonya said, clasping her hands together again.

"I'm not going to tell you to do something you don't want to do, when it comes to your personal life. I can offer guidance if you ask, or need it, but in the end it's your choice. Whatever is going to bring you some measure of happiness. Heaven knows, we all deserve some after all this."

"Yeah, okay." Sonya nodded with a grin. "I should go."

They both pushed off the railing a took a few steps to the door. Garrus and Miranda were waiting near by.

"Thanks, dad." Sonya said.

David smiled back and her and they gave each other a hug. It was good to feel his familiar arms around her again. It was like coming home. The new Normandy just wasn't it, not yet. She felt a little more like herself, and less like a machine. A little more whole.

"You're welcome." David said and pulled away before the tears caught in his throat had time to escape. "Now go kick some ass."

"Aye, aye, Captain." She nodded and headed out the door.


	18. Alchera

Alchera was bitterly cold, windy and desolate. As the UT-47 Kodiak Drop Shuttle neared the landing site, Shepard felt a shiver run down her spine, though she was quite warm in her enviro suit and armor. Garrus sat beside her, available if she needed support. The trip wasn't exactly easy for him either, but she wanted a friend with her... just in case. He was the only one that she trusted with that. Garrus was honored by her request. It was a welcome burden. She held his hand on the cushion between them while she nibbled at the armor where her thumb nail would be. Her heart fluttered in her chest like a humming bird. A million thoughts ran rampant through her mind like hyper active children at play. First and foremost in her mind were thoughts of Nihlus. Despite the warnings, she still wanted to find him. Her emotions were still as strong as the last time they were together, but time was funny now. She had to constantly remind herself that what had passed for others had not passed with her.

The crash site came into view as they passed over an icy peak. The large bits of hull scattered across the snow brought her out of her thoughts to the memory of her home being destroyed by an unknown enemy. A coldness settled in her heart that matched the ice of the planet below. Snow flew up into the air as the shuttle settled down on the surface. Shepard let go of Garrus' hand and moved to get up from the bench when he put a firm, but gentle hand on her shoulder.

"Do you want me to come with you?" He asked, his brow raised in concern. Her request had only been for the shuttle ride, but...

"I'm here if you need me." He verbalized the sentiment.

Shepard grinned behind her face shield. It touched her that he was so concerned for her. He had really come through for her. Here she was, showing up after two years of being dead, working with Cerberus, and he was right there. No questions, no reservation, just open arms. You couldn't ask for more in a friend.

"I think I'll be okay." She replied.

She smiled and punched him in the shoulder so she wouldn't fall apart in front of him. His mandibles fluttered a grin back and she exited the shuttle.

Inside her helmet Shepard could hear her steady breathing, the howl of the wind through the cracks in the glaciers, and the crunch of ice and snow beneath her boots. It was weird thinking about having been here before, but never seeing it. It was just her body that had dropped from the sky. Her soul had gone... some place else. The realization that she remembered leaving her body set a strange tickle going in the back of her mind. She headed to the center of the wreckage. There it sat, as if placed there purposefully by the hand of a titan or a god, was the mako. It was piratically a monument in and of it's self. She smiled when she thought of how long it had taken Garrus to fix the damn thing after they crashed it into the side of the Council's tower. Something glinted in the snow, catching her eye by the mako. She picked up the shiny metal object. It was an ID tag of a crewmen. She found several more as she tramped through the snow, exploring the remains of the Normandy.

The distress beacon she'd launched was near by, propped up right in the snow. Behind that was a little ledge. Something reflected the light of the distant sun in a way that wasn't ice. She rounded the beacon and found a natural ramp up to the ledge. At the top she saw something smooth and round, not a natural formation. Carefully walking along the lip of ice and stone toward the object she discovered her old N7 helmet poking out of the snow. She plucked it from it's frozen nest and dusted it off with a measure of nostalgia. She tucked it under her arm, looking down at the imprint it left in the snow. She wondered if her head had been inside it when her remains were gathered. It was a morbid thought, but some how seemed humanizing.

Every piece of wreckage brought back memories. She found the old cockpit, the remains of the galaxy map. Some of Pressly's journal entries were near by. She was amazed those had survived. He had written about his feelings on the alien members of the crew. In the end he came to respect them. It was good to know that even hate by tradition could be over come.

She decided to place the monument in front of the hull that bore the ships name. She had to admit it was an inspiring sight. She wasn't ready to leave though. She had all twenty of the missing ID tags, but something was missing. She felt like she was visiting her house after a fire had totally consumed it. It was still home, though it was in ruin. A part of her would always be here. She started to trudge back to the shuttle when Joker's voice came over her com.

"Commander, you've got a shuttle coming in to your location. The shuttle's batarian and recently reported as stolen from Omega. It might be a merc."

Or it might be... "Nihlus." She finished the thought aloud as a whisper.

"Joker, what are the landing coordinates?" She asked running back to the Kodiak.

"It'll be landing right on top of your position in a few seconds, Commander. You better get back here."

"Did you get that, Garrus?" She asked over the com.

"Yeah, I heard. We're prepared to hold our position until you get here." He replied.

"Negative, I want to know who's coming to visit the Normandy."

"Commander..."

"We're waiting!" She cut him off with the order as she reached the shuttle.

She took a defensive position behind an outcrop of rock and snow. Garrus left the Kodiak to join her, providing her with an assault rifle.

"I hope you know what you're doing." He grumbled.

"I almost never know what I'm going, Garrus." She teased.

Garrus gave her a side long look. His brand of humor was rubbing off on her and it wasn't always as funny as he thought it was. He watched her face as the alien shuttle landed a few meters from the Kodiak. She looked more hopeful than ready for battle.

"Do you think Kryik is in there?" He asked.

"It's possible." She said.

"I hope you're right." He answered and secured his grip on his rifle.

The hatch on the Woky opened and a fully armored turian emerged from with in. A large stock pile of weaponry could be seen on the floor behind him, but he carried no such armament on his person. The stranger took a few steps toward the Kodiak before he noticed Vakarian and Shepard by the outcrop.

"Stop right there!" Garrus shouted through his helmet in the learned style of C-Sec. that had been ground into him.

Shepard left cover, keeping the target in her sights as she approached.

"What are you doing?" Garrus shouted at her.

"I told you, I want to see who it is." She told him over the com.

She motioned to the Kodiak with the barrel of her gun at the new arrival. The turian complied without resistance.

"Vakarian, secure the stolen shuttle. Take it back to the Normandy. We will be returning it to Omega."

She spoke though the helmet so that their captive could hear her. If he was, indeed, simply a merc or a thief he would object. When he did not her hope caught in her throat like she'd swallowed something whole.

"What about the prisoner?" Garrus asked, eyeing the black and red armor. He had no doubts it was Nihlus, but he wasn't going to let on that he knew. This was something she would have to do alone.

"He's unarmed. I can handle it." Shepard assured him.

"Joker, I'm brining in the Woky. Shepard will follow with the thief." Garrus hailed the Normandy over the com.

"Roger that, Vakarian." Joker replied.

Garrus climbed up into the Woky and guided the shuttle to the Normandy. The pilot of the Kodiak secured the prisoner with a seat belt while Shepard held him at gun point. She waited for the shuttle to leave the surface before addressing her silence captive.

"Can you hear me?" She asked. The turian nodded.

"Can you speak?"

The turian nodded again.

"Take you're helmet off." She ordered.

She wasn't sure if she was ready, but there was no point postponing it. Her heart was throbbing so hard against her chest it hurt. She thought it might explode. She could hear her pulse drumming in her ears as the three fingered hands reached for the shiny black of the helmet and began unclasping the securing mechanisms. She heard the hissing release of the pressurized oxygen flow to the helmet. His face would be exposed first due to the design of turian helmets. She saw a flash of tanned, leather like skin. Her breath caught in her lungs when the white tattooed mandibles emerged from the helmet, quickly followed by the rest of the design she knew so well, punctuated by two bright green eyes. They seemed somewhat duller than she remembered, but it was him. It was Nihlus. He'd found her.


	19. Reunited?

"Nihlus!"

Sonya breathed his name before she threw herself into his arms. I could have been two years for her as well, measured by the amount of relief she felt at being in his embrace. How she'd missed his smell! She landed a kiss on his closed mouth, but when she moved to press her forehead to her mate's he stopped her and shook his head. A fear settled in her gut that she didn't know she could feel. The pounding of her heart stated again, but for a different reason.

"Nihlus? What's wrong?" Her eyes searched his gem like orbs with earnest concern. Her hands cradled his face as he looked back at her with wet eyes.

* * *

"Nihlus!"

She breathed his name just before wrapping herself around him like a blanket. The force of her landing in his lap and pressing herself against him nearly knocked the wind out of him and sent his helmet flying from his grasp to thud against the opposite wall. Her arms were around his neck and her legs were squeezing his hips between them. His surprise settled into profound contentment and joyous relief as he let his arms relax around her and hold her tightly to him. He nuzzled her neck to breath in her scent, long forgotten. How he had missed the feel and smell of her, the sound of her single tone voice, the silken tresses of her hair. Her face was nestled into his neck, her soft breath ticked his skin, just as he remembered. His heart beat heavy in his chest. His aching love for her spurring a wetness in his eyes.

Slowly she sat up and pressed her supple, coral lips against his tougher, less pliable ones. Then she went to press her forehead to his. It was so natural to let her, to be with her again as if nothing had happened. But something had happened, beyond her death. He'd been unable to cope. Unable to move on. He never would have replaced her, even if he'd been able to move beyond his grief. He couldn't be happier to have her back in his arms, by whatever means. The fading scars on her face were proof enough that she'd not been back from the land of the dead long. But he was unworthy of her. He had given in to the carnal pleasures of temporary comfort to burry his torment. He had been unfaithful to her memory. He had dishonored her, even if he was the only one who knew it. He could not allow her to unknowing share in the disgrace he'd brought upon himself. The turian she had loved was an honorable man. He was no longer that man.

Nihlus turned his face aside at the last moment, avoiding the moment that would bond her to him once more. When her lovely dark eyes met his, confused and hurt, it was all he could do to shake his head in a slow, denying reply. Her brow furrowed and she splayed her multiple fingers on either side of his face. His hands settled weakly on her hips as his arms lost their strength under her pained gaze.

"Nihlus? What's wrong?" Sonya asked in earnest concern.

"I..."

He felt he'd rather die than tell her the truth, but if he loved her he owed her the truth, whether she asked for it or not.

"I am not worthy of your love." He said mournfully, still looking into her eyes. "I have conducted myself in dishonorable fashion. I have mated with harlots and easy women. I have..."

He averted his eyes and lowered his head to avoid her gaze. He couldn't bear to confess more to her as she continued to star at him blankly. He prepared to answer uncomfortable questions and receive tearful reprimand. When the hard slap to the face or fist to the jaw did not happen, and instead a soft, gentle touch guided his face back to hers, he was at a loss for words. Hope dared to spark on ember in his chest. But the expression he found was not one of gentle love and forgiveness. She only seemed more hurt. It sent a dagger through him.

"Garrus and David told me you changed, but..."

Sonya slowly backed away from him and sat in her own seat across from him as the shuttle came into the hangar bay of the Normandy. Her platonic father's words echoed in her mind, '_He still love you, Sonya. He wouldn't be out there looking for you if he didn't._' She couldn't deny the truth of it, but she wasn't sure she was quite prepared for what he and Garrus had meant when they'd said Nihlus had changed.

"You _what_?" She breathed the question. "I know I was dead, but... I can't believe you would compromise your own philosophies, your own _morals_... "

As soon as it was safe to exit the shuttle, Sonya left for the elevator without another word to anyone. Garrus looked after her. He was worried about her. He could see the tears spilling over her cheeks, though she had tried to hide them. But he was more concerned with the turian exiting the Kodiak. He marched briskly over to Nihlus, who emerged with his helmet tucked securely under one arm.

"What did you tell her?" Garrus growled.

"The truth." Nihlus said blankly. "What else could I have told her?"

"I don't know, a lie!" Garrus shouted. "Don't you think she's been through enough? How could you do this to her! I tried to tell you! From the beginning, before I left, I tried to warn you that it would come back to bite you in the ass. It wasn't who you were! It wasn't who she would have wanted you to be. You of all people should have known..."

"You were allowed to mourn her!" Nihlus snapped. "What was I supposed to do? If our relationship became public, do you know what could have happened?"

"I can guess as well as you can, Spectre. But I can tell you this... If I had a bond mate like Shepard, I wouldn't have hidden it as if I were ashamed. Who cares what others think!" Garrus shouted at him.

Both turians were facing each other in aggressive stances. Garrus expected Nihlus to attack him for being so disrespectful to a superior officer. When he did not, Garrus was not only disappointed, but disgusted with the turian he saw before him.

"You can't even defend yourself!" Garrus growled. "How can you call yourself a turian!"

Garrus paused a minute more, waiting for the seething Spectre to lash out at the taunt. But when he continued to hold his temper, Garrus decided it wasn't worth the hassle. If Nihlus wasn't willing to fight for her, then he would have to find another way to snap him back to his senses.

"You can sleep in the Port Observatory, or you can bunk on the floor of one of the cargo bays. Whichever you think you deserve." Garrus growled.

He promptly turned for the elevators to follow Shepard. She might need consolation, or just a shoulder to cry on. If nothing else, she could yell and scream at him all the things she wanted to scream at Nihlus. Anything he could do to let her know he was there for her, even if it was just to be turned away when he knocked on her door.

* * *

**I've read several discussions, and have found nothing there or in any wiki to confirm or deny if turians have tear ducts or can cry. So for this story I've decided that turian eyes are moisturized similarly to human's when they blink, but no tear ducts as human's have. Instead the tears come from several smaller glands under the flesh around their eyes that are transfered to the eye by way of a series of micro tubes, like veins. Strong emotional responses can trigger over production of 'tears' in these glands, much like humans, and over moisturize the eye causing abnormal wetness. If enough 'wetness' gathers over the eye to break the surface tension of the liquid, it could form a 'tear' and escape the lids to roll down the face. So, no ducts, but can 'cry'. **


	20. Competition

Garrus found the doors unlocked, much to his surprise, so he nervously let himself in. He found Sonya laying across her bed with her face buried in a pillow. It shook him to see her in such a state. He'd considered that she might be crying, but to actually see it happening... It wasn't something he was truly prepared for. Shepard was a bastion of strength and resolve. She stopped an army of geth and a Reaper. How could such a person be brought down by such a small thing by comparison?

The turian crossed the space between them and sat down gingerly on the edge of the bed next to her. Her quiet, muffled sobs barely audible in the silence of her room. He tentatively put a consoling hand on her shuddering shoulders. This kind of thing was new to him. He was unsure what he should do or say next. So he sat with out saying anything at all.

Eventually the crying stopped and Sonya sat up, wiping away the tears with the heal of her hands. She looked at Garrus who simply stared back at her. His innocent clueless availability put a small grin on her face.

"Thank you." She said softly.

"Of course." Garrus nodded back.

"I don't know why I'm so upset." Sonya shrugged. "I should be happy he's here. I was dead. I can't rightly judge him for anything he's done. He's still an honorable man. He stopped me from bonding with him in the shuttle."

"He did?" Garrus asked, surprised that Nihlus had passed up the opportunity to have her back.

"Yeah." Sonya said, falling back onto the bed and propping herself up with her elbow. "He did. Then he told me about his... adventures into the club world of the Citadel."

"Shepard, I'm not going to tell you what to do. But maybe you should listen to what he has to say." Garrus suggested.  
He just wanted her to be happy. She deserved to be, and had been with Nilus once. He wanted that for her again.

* * *

Nihlus sat on a crate facing the small view port on the opposite side of the room His eyes were staring blankly a the stars as they flew by. What was he doing here? He didn't deserve her forgiveness. He wished he'd never found out she was alive. She'd of been better off to go on without him. Garrus was right, he couldn't even defend himself for her favor. He was a pitiful excuse for a turian.

His self loathing was interrupted when Garrus burst into the room. He dismounted the crate as the vigilante charged at him and slammed him into the wall behind him. Garrus' teeth were bared in rage.

"If you break her heart, I'll make sure your last breath is taken _without yours_!"

Something in Nihlus clicked. Garrus was right, and he wasn't about to let this renegade threaten him. Sonya had fallen in love with him when he was a strong, bold, and proud turian male.A Spectre for the Council of the Citadel. He had been a force to be reckoned with. He was still. He only needed to prove it to her, and himself.

Nihlus' brow knitted and he pushed Garrus off him with one forceful shove. Garrus stumbled back, but steadied himself against the fall. He took an aggressive stance as Nihlus charged him. The two turians locked talons on the shoulder crest of the other.

"It seems you haven't lost your back bone after all!" Garrus taunted.

"She's my mate, Garrus! I'll not let you take her from me!" Nihlus growled.

"I told her to give you a chance, you son-of-a-bitch! I have no interest in taking your mate. If she refuses to accept you back, it will be on your own head! Stop wallowing in self pity and go to her!" Garrus seethed.

Garrus' words angered Nihlus as much as surprise him. He bared his teeth in a snarl. He tried to force Garrus to the ground, his green eyes ablaze with his frustration, but Garrus' strength was a match for his own. Garrus butted his head hard on Nihlus' face before the two pushed off each other in a draw.

"This isn't over, Vakarian." Nihlus growled, his teeth centimeters from Garrus' face.

"And if she rejects you?" Garrus growled back.

"The Vakarian name remains well respected. Stick to your own kind." Nihlus snapped back. "Return to Novea!"

Garrus blinked at the name, remembering the turian female. He regretted having told Nihlus about her now, but they had still been friends of a sort at the time. He knew very well that Nihlus would not be likely to find a mate among their own people. Shepard was the closest thing he had at a chance at happiness. He had to ensure that the outsider would grow a set and go up see her.

"Even if Sonya takes you back, when she finds out how much like Saren you've become..."

Nihlus cut him off with a fist to the face. Garrus reeled back, then returned with his own fists. Nihlus blocked, then countered, sending Garrus to the floor with a thud. He was confused when Garrus started chuckling.

"Good to see you coming around." Garrus laughed, grabbing at his chest. Nihlus had knocked the wind from him.

"We shall see." Nihlus nodded and spit blue blood from his mouth to the floor at his feet. He left without helping Garrus up.

* * *

Sonya turned when she heard the doors hiss open, setting the data pad of dossiers down on the desk. She'd just returned from the Command Deck to confirm the next target destination. The mask of Commander Shepard helped ease her back to herself, a fragile state which was shaken when Nihlus appeared in her door way with a trickle of blood on his lips.

"Nihlus! What happened? Are you okay?"

She stood up from her seat in alarm. Nihlus tentatively touched his hand to his mouth, unaware that he was still bleeding. Garrus really got him good. Sonya grabbed a fresh hand towel from the shower room and brought it to the turian, slightly moist with cool water. She took his arm and guided him to the sofa at the foot of the stair, sitting down beside him on the black cushion.

"I'm okay." He said after the bleeding stopped. "Don't worry about it."

"You know I will." She smiled back at him. Her eyes were still a little red and puffy from the tears.

"I'm so sorry, Sonya. I should have been a better man." Nihlus said softly, shaking his head.

"No, It's okay. I can't be angry with you for things you did in the past. I was dead, I have no right." Sonya replied.

She slipped a hand over the mandible furthest from her and turned his face toward her. His eyes found hers, filled with the pain of years beyond what had passed. His brow plates furrowed with worry.

"I know you still love me." Sonya said, her black eyes searching his. "You are still an honorable man, if for no other reason than the fact that you hunted me down to confess your misdeeds. I'm alive. We can be together again."

Nihlus' eyes lit up with a renewed fire. His heard fluttered in his chest. His mandibles tentatively spread into a grin. His hands lay numb in his lap.

"You forgive me?" He asked, unable to believe that she could pardon him so quickly and easily.

Sonya smiled and pressed her lips against his mouth once more. He closed his eyes and wrapped his strong arms around her, drawing her to him. Her lips were soft and warm against his. Her lips parted and her tongue sought out his, his own lips readily allowing her access. The sweet taste of her coupled with her scent, the warmth of her body broke through all the walls he'd built around the wound in his heart.

"I missed you so much!"

Nihlus whispered into her hair as it fell from it's tidy bun. It's silken strands like the white light of heaven between his talons. Sonya's hand moved from his cheek to her uniform, stripping off the long, coat like blouse. He was taken aback when he saw the absents of his markings on her and the presence of new, medical looking ones. His bewilderment must have been apparent on his face, because Sonya immediately answered the unspoken questions.

"I think they were 'repaired' when they rebuilt me." Sonya explained. "I miss them too, but you can always make new ones."

Sonya offered a grin as she took his hands and placed them on her perky, round breasts. Nihlus pressed him mouth to hers and slipped his hands over her chest to her sides.

"You will have me as your own again?" Nihlus asked, still unsure, still nervous and in disbelief that she was here, in his arms again after all that time.

"Of course." Sonya said. "You are my life mate. I love you."

Nihlus' mandibles spread in a wide smile, his eyes were wet with powerful emotions he'd bottled up since her death. His talons lightly raked down her ribs, causing Sonya to take a sharp breath in and arch into him. He nuzzled his face against the soft, healing flesh of her bosom. He could hear her breath becoming deeper and her heart rate quicken in the rise and fall of her chest. Suddenly, with quick, graceful movements, Sonya dismounted and took hold of his hand, guiding him to the comfort of her bed. He needed no encouragement. It was almost as if the last two years of her absence had never happened. They were together again, on the Normandy, their home, and his bond mate was taking him to bed to make love to him.

She settled over him as comfortably as ever, as he tucked the pillows under his neck for comfort of his fringe. It seemed death had not erased her familiarity with his body. Her lips took his, her tongue found the smooth length of his own in a dance he had almost forgotten. His talons found their way through the longer tresses, those strange fibers called hair, that he adored so much that fell around her face and shoulders like a halo. Her delicate fingers traced over the white markings of his face and over his sensitive fringe. His want quickly hardened and extended from the protective moistening folds. The sweet must of her own desire was a delicate aroma that he breathed deep, arousing his passions to a burning heat. His talons dug into her back as he held her to him, slowly pushing his way into her hot, tight, wetness. Sonya arched into him with a cry of pain and pleasure. He could feel her body stretching to accommodate him, as if it were the first time she'd been with a man. He breathed her name as he had done many times before, only this time she was there to hear it. With each ridge that entered her, she cried out and moaned his name, as she had only ever done for him. She carefully rolled her hips against him. Her own moistness began to drip down his shaft to pool around the base of him. Her hair fell around him like curtains made by angels. Her breath on his face was a breeze from heaven as she rocked above him. He watched her face with admiration as she arched again with blissful orgasm, moaning her ecstacy.

Nihlus found her deep, exotic eyes with his fiery green gems, all the love and need for her translating to an unwritable language, spoken only in sighs and moans. Her own powerful emotions staring back at him, soft and warm as he throbbed inside her. He carefully rolled her under him, cradling her in his pushed deeper into her as he settled over her, filling her, thrusting gently in and out of her swollen passion. The soft moans that escaped her supple lips were like a song. He let his own purrs join the chorus against the soft skin of her neck, tickling the flesh. He made love to her as he had only ever done for her, gentle and caring, enjoying her body and attentive to her pleasure. He knew just how to touch her, how to kiss her neck and mouth, how to caress the sensitive places to afford her the most satisfaction. He relished her as she quivered beneath him, her inner walls spasming around him as he joined her in climax. Their moans echoed off the walls in perfect harmony. He pressed his forehead to hers, as he had so many times before, but this time felt more poignant, more precious because of the guilt she had relieved him of through her forgiveness and open acceptance of him. Her unfailing love.

In the dim light of the empty fish tanks he held her tightly to him as they lay side by side, breathing each other's air while he slowly receded from her shuddering body. Her fingers clung delicately to his chest, her slender legs folded perfectly between his, their bodies molded to the other as best they could. Her face nuzzled into the softer flesh of his neck as they drifted off to sleep, the first restful sleep either of them had experienced since the destruction of the original Normandy. A small trickle of red stained her skin from the newly carved 'N' on her chest where his chest spur caught her flesh.


	21. Forward Batteries

Garrus kept to the forward batteries the next day. He'd waited for Nihlus to return to finish their brawl either in triumph or defeat. When he did not, Garrus got the answer he'd hoped for. Shepard had taken Nihlus back into her arms. He assumed they would spend the next day alone in her quarters 'making up for lost time', so to speak. So when the doors hissed open behind him and the unique scent of her filtered through the air to his nose, he was rather surprised.

"Shepard." He said over his shoulder. "Need me for something?"

"Have you got a minute?" Shepard asked.

"Sure. I was just checking the weapons systems. You can never be too careful." He answered casually as he turned to her.

Garrus watched her as she walked over to the railing and leaned against it on one elbow. She glanced down at the armaments before focusing on his face. She seemed more relaxed and much happier than she had. It gave him a feeling of satisfaction to be the one helping her with a personal issue for a change.

"I thought I'd seen every weapon in the galaxy in our fight against Saren. Mercenary work showed me other wise." He began as they kept eye contact, making sure to avoid any conversation leading to the events of the previous night.

"And now Cerberus rebuilds the Normandy with a few upgrades to boot. I wish we'd joined up with them sooner." He teased, well mostly.

"I'm pleased to see that you're getting along with the new crew." Shepard replied, cocking a brow at him.

"They're as friendly to me as people from a group like Cerberus can be. And they've got you vouching for them." He gestured to her.

"I can't exactly doubt your judgment. Not after I got my own squad killed." He said, averting his eyes. The guilt riddled memories crept into is mind.

"How did you end up fighting mercenaries on Omega?" She was genuinely interested in how he ended up _there_ of all places.

"I trained to become a Spectre after the Normandy was destroyed," He clasped his talons behind his back, proud that he could tell her he'd finally done it. "but it didn't work out. Too much poloticing at the Citadel. Nobody was willing to take risks." He shook his head. "Omega was filled with criminals nobody else could touch and there was no red tape to slow me down. It was a perfect fit. People there needed someone to believe in. Someone to stand up to those thugs."

"That explains how you started. How'd you end up with a squad?"

She was impressed and happy that he'd gone through with the training, despite what his father may have felt about it. It didn't matter that it didn't stick. He'd followed through.

"Not too different from how you formed your squad to fight Saren, actually. You prove that you can get things done and people join up." He started pacing. "Mercs who wanted to atone, Security consultants tired of playing by the rules. I gave them hope."He said with his arms out wide displaying himself. Proud of what he'd started.

"Tell me about your squad." Shepard asked, curious to know what kind of people he'd spent the last year with. Who they were. How they affected him.

"There were twelve of us, including me. Former military operatives, C-sec agents, the usual. Had a salarian explosives expert. Pretty sure he's spent time in the STG. My tech expert was a batarian, believe it or not. Not the _friendliest_ guy, but he could hack any system ever built."

"What did your merc squad do? It didn't sound like you were available for hire." She raised her brows with curiosity.

"You saw Omega... it was full of thugs kicking the helpless. I formed my team to kick back." He clinched his fists.

"We weren't mercenaries. At least, no one was paying us." He started pacing. "We made money by taking down slavers, pirates or gangs that went too far. Every member of my team had lost someone to Omega's gangs. We weren't out to get rich. We were out to make those bastards think twice before murdering someone in the street."

"Doesn't sound like you made a lot of friends." Shepard grinned. She expected nothing less of the former C-Sec officer.

"I got three separate merc bands to work together to take me down. My manager at C-sec would be impressed." He cocked his head with pride.

"It was simple. We'd hit their shipments, disrupt activities. Get under their skin. Make them _angry_. They'd come charging into our well prepared kill zone. Cross fire and snipers. Clean and surgical. They never stood a chance." Garrus said, chin raised and chest puffed up. He'd never been more proud of an accomplishment he could call his own.

"How did those mercenary groups take down your team?" She asked softly. She knew it was going to be a touchy subject, but she wanted to know.

Garrus looked her in the eye for a second then shook shook his head, walking away. His haunches were up, the plates on the back of his neck raised slightly, telling of his irritation, but not at her.

"It was my own damn fault. One of my people betrayed me."

He walked deliberately out into the hall. Shepard pushed off the rail to follow him. He made certain to keep his back to her. He didn't want to focus his anger on her.

"A turian named Sidonis." Garrus shook his head again, his mandibles flexing. "He drew me away just before the mercs attacked my squad, then he disappeared. Everyone, except me, is dead because of him. Because I didn't see it coming."

He turned his upper body sharply toward her to look at her, to show her he wasn't hiding from the blame.

"Are you sure that's what happened? Maybe they took him out first." Sonya suggested

"No. I put out feelers. He booked passage and cleared his accounts. He sold me out and ran." Garrus said with certainty. He admired that she was trying to give a complete stranger the benefit of the doubt.

"Do you know where Sidonis is now?" She asked, offering her assistance in much the same way Nihlus had with Dr. Saleon.

"No. His trail vanishes after he leaves Omega, but I'll keep hunting." He assured her as much as himself, turning to her completely. "I lost my whole team except Sidonis. One day I'll find him... and correct that." He nodded to her in his certainty.

Garrus could see Sonya's determination to help him. It reminded him of when Nihlus helped him find Dr. Saleon. Maybe they did belong together. No, this time he would take care of Sidonis himself. He appreciated his friends wanting to help him, and he wouldn't turn them away, but he wasn't going to ask them for it.

Garrus shook his head and walked passed Shepard without looking at her. He could smell the sweet scent of her skin as he passed. With a passing thought he mused how lucky Nihlus was to have a woman like Shepard by his side.

"Thanks for coming by, Shepard. I've got some things to take care of." He said, trying to sound genuine, but his words sounded harsh in his own ears. He couldn't bring himself to face her. Not while he was so angry with himself.


	22. Purgatory

Shepard joined Kryik on the command deck. The new Normandy was beginning to feel a little more like home with him aboard. She stood beside him as the prison ship Purgatory, once an 'ark ship' for agricultural animals, came into view through the widows of the cockpit. Cerberus had made arrangements to 'buy' a prisoner for the mission, one called simply; 'Jack'. Shepard questioned Cerberus' decision to include a dangerous criminal, a powerful biotic one at that. Jack's biotic abilities would certainly be valuable against the Collectors, if the criminal was willing to take orders and work with them.

"Are you sure about this, Shepard?" Kryik asked.

He'd read the dossier that morning in bed with Sonya sleeping soundly against his chest. He could almost feel the white strands of silk slip through his fingers as they had while he read the data pad, like beams of moonlight. He felt alive again, as if had died with her that day. In a way, he supposed he had.

"No," She answered, "But I want to meet this '_Jack_' before I decide. Purgatory is run by the Blue Suns. For all we know, he may be an innocent man."

"While that's true, I wasn't referring to the prisoner. I don't trust the warden to keep his word. They are mercenaries, Shepard. They're not in it for the good of the galaxy, though I'm sure they'll tell us they are. They're in it for the money. You can't trust mercs."

"What about Wrex?" Shepard pointed out.

"Wrex proved himself in the end, but by then he had his own reasons to go after Saren. Before that, his loyalty to the mission rested on the credits in his pocket." Kryik replied, in no way attempting to hide his cynicism.

"Sorry to interrupt, Commander," Joker interrupted, "but I'm with him on that one."

"Thanks for having my back, Joker." Shepard remarked, narrowing her eyes at the back of Joker's head rest.

"Just callin' it how I see it." Joker replied.

"I don't trust the mercs any more than you do, and that's exactly why I want to meet the prisoner. Kryik, go get Garrus. He'll have experience with Blue Suns that may be useful once we're in there. Joker, bring us in."

* * *

Shepard made confident, casual steps toward the fully armored turian Blue Suns guard that was waiting for them, gun in hand. It seemed security was tight, even for paying customers.

"Welcome to the Purgatory, Shepard." The guard greeted her. "Your package is being prepped, and you can claim it shortly. As this is a high security vessel, you need to relinquish your weapons before we proceed."

This was starting out on the wrong foot already. Someone else was trying to take their guns. Why did the welcoming committee alway want to take their guns? She thought about suggesting he go find a job on Noveria. He'd get along just fine with the guard duty there. These people were pissing her off way too soon in the game. Shepard pulled her gun, Vakarian and Kryik followed her lead. Kryik felt a little strange to not be the one in charge.

"I'll relinquish one bullet." Shepard replied. "Where do you want it?"

She was not unaware of the other guards training their weapons on her and her team. However, her aim did not falter and her gaze only steeled against the faceless turian in front of her. Behind the guard the main doors opened an a bare faced turian in Blue Suns armor with no gun or helmet entered the bay area.

"Everyone stand down!" He shouted. Obviously he was the one in charge. "Commander, I'm Warden Kuril, and this is my ship. Your weapons will be returned to you on the way out. You must realize this is just standard procedure."

"It's _my_ standard procedure to _keep _my _gun_." Shepard stated.

Shepard was pretty sure the warden narrowed his eyes at her. She returned the expression, amplified. She wasn't going to be intimidated by a self made cop. The only 'law' the warden enforced was his own, and she wasn't part of the governed population. Kuril could shove it.

"Let them proceed." Kuril ordered with a point of his chin. "Our facility is more than secure enough to handle three armed guests." He kept his eyes locked on Shepard. "We're bringing 'Jack' out of cyro. As soon as the funds clear, you can be on your way. If you'll follow me to Out Processing for the pick up, Commander." Kuril gestured to the door with a shallow sweep of his hand.

"Let's go." Shepard replied, and moved to follow the warden.

She was more than ready to leave this place. She didn't like dealing with mercs, unless she was shooting them. Something didn't feel right about the whole deal. The 'funds' should have cleared before they arrived. 'Jack' should have already been prepped and waiting for them. Cerberus had promised that everything was taken care of. This was supposed to be a simple pick-up and take-off mission. There was a rat, and she was pretty sure it had on Blue Suns armor.

Kryik and Vakarian shared her sentiments. Kuril was bare-faced, and that was enough for them besides being a Blue Suns jailer. They followed Shepard silently through the doors as Kuril invited them through.

Kuril turned on his heels, gesturing with wide arms to them as he took a half step backwards to introduce his accomplishments.

"Cell block two." Kuril began, "As you can see, we keep tight control on the population." He made sure to point out the cell block being plucked from it's hole and moved to an interrogation slot.

"Each prisoner's cell is a self contained, modular unit." Kuril continued. "I've blown a few out the air locks as an example. This ship is made up of thirty cell blocks identical to this one."

Kuril took a few more half steps backwards with his hands on his hips, as if in casual conversation with friends. He continued this behavior as he explained the station and it's righteous purpose.

"We house thousands of criminals. We can put the whole place on lock down at a moment's notice. Nothing goes wrong here."

"How'd you end up running this place?" Shepard asked.

"I was in law enforcement of Palavan, and got sick of seeing criminals escape out into the galaxy to carry on with their crimes."

Garrus' attention was snagged on the hook. The story was so similar to his own he had to listen. He didn't believe Kuril, of course. The warden was a Blue Suns mercenary. He was a criminal. A bit ironic for a criminal to run a prison for other criminals.

"Eventually I hit upon this idea; keep the criminals in space, and the galaxy is a safer place. Someone had to stand up and make it happen. I rose to the challenge." Kuril stated.

"Somehow I don't see all this being taken care of out of charity. I doubt any of this comes out of _your_ pockets." Kryik scoffed.

"Each prisoner brings in funds from their home world to keep them here. If they can't pay then we can't keep the prisoner. It's that simple. You don't have to agree with my methods, but you can't question my motives. These are despicable people and I'm keeping them locked up."

"I see." Kryik responded as casually as Kuril had answered the question, accusatory undertones were to be inferred but not directly stated.

"Have you had any escape attempts?" Vakarian asked as politely as he could, glancing out the windows that lined the walkway.

He was trying to keep up polite conversation, as well as being genuinely curious, but he would rather have shot his way to the recruit than put up with this bull shit. Kuril's story was just that, a story. Garrus felt insulted. The same reasons he had gone to Omega were being used to justify an extortion racket. He and his team had come together to fight against things like this, against groups like the Blue Suns. Omega was just a flash of light in a field full of shards of glass.

"We're in space. They have no where to go, and they know it." Kuril replied casually. "But still, we exercise extreme caution. These are dangerous individuals. We have many ways to control the population."

Out side the windows, as if on que, two prisoners presumably on exercise privileges started arguing with each other. A near by Blue Suns officer hit a few keys on his omni-tool and a transistor popped up out of a support column, spouting blue, pulsing arcs of energy that surrounded and separated the two men in their own spherical forcefields.

The trio got the distinct sense that it wasn't simply a tour. It felt more like a display of power, intimidation. While Nihlus kept his cool and casually strode behind Shepard with his hands resting on his hips, Garrus rolled his shoulders, restlessly. He was getting anxious. He knew well his tendency to be short tempered, 'wearing' his animosity 'right out there on his sleeves', as humans would say. He was trying not to give away the fact that they were catching on. Garrus glanced over to Shepard as the doors ahead hissed open.

"I'm going to confirm that the funds from Cerberus have cleared." Kuril told them as he stepped to one side of the doorway.

"Out Processing is strait down this hallway." He pointed with one long finger. "Just keep going past the interrogation rooms and the super max wing."

Kuril leaned into Shepard, openly glaring at her, disguising his physical taunt as a turn to retreat down the hall. Shepard wasn't fooled, and she certainly wasn't intimidated. Whatever Kuril had planned, he wasn't going to get what he wanted.

"I'll catch up with you latter... Shepard." Kuril called back to her as he left the team.

On his way out, Kuril offered the same open glare to Kryik. He only added a disgusted sneer. Kryik glared back, stiffening his posture defensively. Kuril was obviously showing his disapproval of his relationship with Shepard. The scent of him on her was not a subtle one in a turian nose.

The doors separating the sections closed promptly behind the warden. Shepard shifted her weight from her hip to her foot. There was no turning back now. She confidently proceeded down the hall. Kryik lengthened his stride to catch up to Shepard. He lowered his head and softened his voice to offer his conjecture to the strange loveliness of his Commander's ear.

"I don't trust him." He murmured.

"Yes, we've discussed this already." She muttered back.

"He's hiding something." Nihlus added.

"I know. But we can't do anything about it, until we know what '_it_' is." She whispered.

"I think we should just get Jack and get the hell outta here." Garrus suggested, coming up the other side of her.

Shepard nodded in agreement, never taking her eyes from the path ahead. The unmistakable muffled thud of fist against flesh and cries of pain echoed though the halls. The noises got louder as they neared the interrogation rooms. It seemed the guards were in process of 'questioning' a prisoner. When the turian guard on watch duty came into view, Shepard glanced into the cube. She didn't like what she saw. There was no 'questioning' going on at all. A fully armored turian merc was mercilessly beating on a human male wearing little more than rags. It was enough to stop her in her tracks in spite of her brain urging her to mind her own business, complete the mission and book it as fast as she could the hell outta there. Behind her Garrus was just as disgusted.

"You don't even get good information that way." Speaking from his experiences at C-Sec. "After a point, victims admit to anything to make the pain stop."

The turian on watch duty looked to Shepard as she stood watching in silence, her face empty of emotion, her fingers curled into fists.

"Is there something I can do for you?"

He sounded young and deceptively innocent as he stood there in his merc armor, gun in hand.

"There's no excuse for beating a prisoner who can't fight back." Shepard stated.

Behind her both turians flashed a smile. Shepard had never been afraid to tell anyone exactly what she was thinking if it didn't put the mission in jeopardy. It was something they both admired and loved about her, in their own way.

"This is a massage compared to what his victims went through." The guard retaliated.

"This degrades you as much as him." Shepard said, looking at the face plate of the guard's helmet, hoping she was making eye contact as he looked at her. She was trying to appeal to his sense of honor, if he had one.

"We have orders." He defended, sounding once again like an adolescent and not an adult holding a gun.

"You're not_ important_ enough to make your _own_ decisions?" She asked.

"I admit... I sometimes get tired of this. Does it really get us anything useful?" The guard shrugged and shook his head.

"Stop this, for your own sake." Shepard said soothingly.

"Yeah, you're right." The turian nodded, then called to the other merc, "Call it off... at least for now." He shrugged.

Inside the cube the other turian ceased his brutalization of the prisoner, looking back at the human female that had convinced this fellow turian to go against orders. The victim curled into a ball in the furthest corner of the cell. Shepard wondered what the turian watchman behind the helmet was thinking, why he had listened to her. She hoped it would lead him down a path of self examination and maybe enlightenment to a better path, but she was probably being more optimistic than was realistic. More likely she'd end up having to shoot him somewhere down the line. From the feel of things, that time was coming sooner than she'd like.

When she felt the subtle touch on her wrist she didn't have to look to know it was Nihlus, gently urging her to move on. She'd done her 'good deed', it was time to go. She left wondering if the prisoner didn't actually deserve what he was getting. In the next cell over, another prisoner was waiting for his turn to be 'interrogated'. He called out to her, but she passed by. She didn't have time to spare. She'd spent too much time already being a 'good Samaritan'. She entered the door next to the wall marked 'Out Processing'. Inside a human tech in a civilian lab uniform directed her to more doors on the far side of the room. She nodded to him and headed for the doors. The hairs on the back of her neck were on end. Whatever was going on, she was about to find out what _it_ was.


	23. Finding Jack

Shepard's toes crossed the line of large block lettering on the floor that read; stand clear. A warning that had been absent at all the other doors. She readied herself to grab her gun. The doors opened to a very small, and empty room. It was a cell. She wasn't exactly surprised. She didn't expect '_it_' to be literally on the other side of the doors. She needed little explanation. She didn't care why Kuril wanted her as a prisoner, he wouldn't get his way, but he must have decided she at least deserved a reason for his actions because his voice echoed off the walls from the intercom.

"My apologies, Shepard. You're valuable as a prisoner than a customer. Drop your weapons and proceed into the open cell. You will not be harmed."

"You talked up your noble intentions with this prison, but it turns out you're a criminal like the rest." Shepard seethed.

"Activate Systems!" Kuril shouted over the com, his previous calm leaking panic.

Shepard didn't know what systems Kuril had just voice activated, but she did know that he was more afraid of her than he cared to admit. Apparently her reputation superceded her. She took cover behind a row of desks mid way though the room as Blue Suns guards were sent in to apprehend her, with gun fire. It seemed it was a 'if I can't have you no one can' statement of force.

Garrus fell into similar cover from the rear position by the cell. Nihlus was exact opposite her, providing flanking fire. The only entry to the room had the same funneling effect as the bridge had to Garrus' hide out on Omega, allowing the trio to pick off their attackers as they came. After the fist wave, Shepard made for the door only to be greeted by two FENRIS mechs. An overload signal from Garrus' omni-tool stalled them long enough for Shepard to back away, firing into the mechanical attack dogs until they exploded.

"Reinforcements to Out Processing! Shepard is loose!" Kuril shouted over the intercom.

"Most of the Blue Suns here seem to be turian," Garrus told her as he and Nihlus joined her at the doorway. "Hit them in the forehead with a round, it will force their head back for a split second, exposing the weak spot in their armor at the neck."

"Got it." Shepard nodded.

She'd had a slightly different plan in mind, but that worked too. It didn't take long for the three of them to reach the larger room at the end of the hall from which the guards flooded to impede their progress. A loan tech guarded a console with a pistol when the doors opened.

"Shepard is on the loose! Repeat, Shepa..."

The unarmored human male was cut short by a well placed shot to the face. Shepard glanced over her shoulder to see it was Kryik who'd made the shot. She would have been impressed and emotionally wooed by they gesture, if not for the cold look in his eye. It wasn't his desire to protect her, or training, or the steel of battle that was present in that chill. No, there was something far more disturbing coming to the surface in that moment. An alarm sounded in her mind that made her rather uncomfortable to be so near him. She was glad he was on her side, but she feared the possibility that he might loose control of the demon that was lurking out through that gaze.

Shepard quickly approached the console the tech had been trying to protect. Through the windows that lined the upper half of the wall she could see a ramp leading to a single cryo chamber that was locked below floor level. She scanned the transparent orange display screen of the console. The prisoner currently in the cryo tube was Jack. The tech had encrypted the unlocking and de-freezing commands.

"Shepard, if you hack that control, every door on the cell block opens." Garrus warned.

"It's a risk we have to take if you want to get Jack out of cryo." Nihlus added.

"I'm doin' it. Be ready." She warned.

She had to agree with him. There was no other option if they were going to aquire Jack. Shepard quickly broke through the week encryption codes. A buzzer sounded and below them three heavy mechs came to life. A large arm extended from the wall with two long prongs at the end of it. The arm inserted itself into the slots at the top of the cryo chamber, causing pressure releases to pop up spewing steam. The arm unscrewed the chamber from the floor and pulled up the entire platform Shepard had thought to be a walkway around the tube. Icy mist fogged their view for a few seconds then cleared away. The half nude form before them was not what any of them had expected. The shaved head of a human _female_ lay lax against the head rest of the standing restraint module. Her neck and wrists clearly bolted to the back and arm rests with thick, study metal. Her fully tattooed body and outwardly defiant clothing made her an _intriguing_ sight to behold, to say the least.

"_That's Jack_?" Garrus asked in disbelief and mild amusement. He voiced what they were all thinking.

Shepard noticed the fingers on one hand twitching. She leaned forward and narrowed her eyes, trying to get a better look to confirm that she had, in fact, seen movement only seconds after being retrieved from cryo. Something that was unheard of.

"Did you see..." She started to ask Kryik over her shoulder when the figure below came to life, impressively pulling free from the restraints that held her captive.

A hand went to her temple and she shook her head. Seconds latter her battle cry could be heard through the glass as Shepard, Kryik and Vakarian watched the woman launch herself at the guarding mechs. Her body erupted into blue flame her opposite hand growing into a ball of biotic power. The team looked on with amazement as Jack ran fearlessly into the mech directly ahead of her. There was a loud, dull thud and a flash of light from below them.

"We have to get down there!" Nihlus urged, lightly grazing a talon over Shepard's wrist. She followed him through the doors leading to the lower level without hesitation. The sounds of explosions booming on the other side of the wall as they descended.

The scene that met there eyes upon opening the doors came as a shock. All three mechs had been destroyed. It seemed they need not worry about Jack's ability to defend herself, or helping her escape. There was a large hole in the wall opposite them, and Jack was gone.


	24. Cell Blocks

"All guards, restore order! Lethal forced authorized, but don't kill Jack! Techs, lock down. Lock down!"

Kuril shouted the order over the intercom as the team hustled through the tunnel Jack had made. His voice rang throughout the cell block. On the heels of his orders the ships computer announced life support failure in several sectors with no survivors. Shepard could only guess it was Jack's handiwork. As they exited the tunnel, one of the 'plucking' arms was ripped biotically from it's base and nearly dropped on top of them.

"Her biotics are impressive." Kryik mused, "But she lacks subtlety."

He'd meant the last as a compliment to Sonya, but the comment was lost to the heat of battle as they ran head long into the shouting and gun fire of Blue Suns and escaped convicts. A missile from a heavy mech exploded near by against a crate, incinerating an escapee to ashen dust.

"Don't fire on the convicts unless it's defensive. Let them take some of the fire off of us. We'll have to take out that mech if we're going to get through those doors." Shepard said and pointed with her chin to the exit on the far side of the battle field.

Garrus and Nihlus nodded their understanding and moved quickly across the bridge that spanned a large trough. Shepard followed her 'boys', as she was quickly coming to think of them, to take cover behind a set of armored crates. She could hear the clink-clank of the mechs metal feet stopping it's way toward them. Fires were burning anything that wasn't metal. Servos and crates full of ammo and other explosives were erupting into bonfires with a loud boom that shook the floor. Men were screaming as they fought and died.

As Shepard fired her own gun, adding it's noise to the din, she couldn't remember why these sounds never bothered her before. It worried her that she was unable to block out the sounds as she had before. In that instant she felt something hard bump into her. She turned to see that Kryik had taken cover next to her to give his shields time to recover. It was his armor that had bumped into hers. She lowered into cover beside him, their backs to the crates and knees pulled up to eye level. Kryik glanced over at her, breathing steadily through his nose. The fire of battle in his eye, the coldness lurking just beneath the surface. They just stared into each other, breathing the smoke of death in the air until his shields recharged. He gave her a quick nudged to the forehead with his, cupping her face in one hand, his eyes closed for the brief moment, before heading silently back out into battle. She wasn't sure of which emotion she felt more completely; confusion or desire.

* * *

Nihlus left the protective cover of the crates behind, she was safe, but he knew she wouldn't stay there. He would do his best to take out the mech and as many of the Blue Suns as possible. If a few 'innocent' escapees got caught in the cross fire, so be it. He would do what he could to clear the way for her. He wouldn't loose her again. He was determined to grow old with her, even if that meant leaving everything else behind.

"All prisoners return to your cells _immediately_, or I'll open every air lock on this ship!" Kuril threatened over the intercom.

Kryik took cover behind a few crates further ahead. Down below Vakarian removed a few of the criminally insane with incendiary rounds. He heard the distinct sound of the heavy mech rounding the corner. One of it's servos whined. He heard sparks from loose wires. One of it's legs was damaged. He listened with his back to the crate, straining to hear over the blare of alarms.

'Clink, szzick, clank, clink, szziick, clank.'

It was the left leg. Probably the hip joint. He waited for the 'clank' to echo off the crates he hid behind then rose from cover, aimed at the blue sparks flying from the hip facing him and fired. His rounds severed the leg from it's joint in the hip. The mech jolted as it's body slipped from the leg, breaking the last of the connecting wires, then tumbled down the side of the trough.

"Incoming!" Kryik shouted down to Vakarian. Giving Garrus a few needed seconds to find protective cover from the resulting explosion that finished off the mech.

Smaller pieces of shrapnel and other debris hailed down on him. He could hear larger pieces bouncing off the crates. When the rain stopped he looked up to see a rather nasty bit of steel protruding from the wall mere centimeters from where his head would have been. It only gave him a greater sense of purpose.

"Shepard, Vakarian... " He shouted.

"I'm fine, where's Shepard?" Vakarian shouted back from beneath the bridge.

"I'm here! I'm good!" Shepard came out from behind the crates he'd shared with her. "Let's go!"

She made brief eye contact with him as she passed, a smirk on her lips. Nihlus' mandibles fluttered like the butterflies in his gut. He'd forgotten how that smirk of hers, the mischievous one that said; 'I like what I see', always made him forget they weren't the same species. He followed after her to the next battle. It didn't matter if it was official or not, the SDA was back in action.

"Shepard," EDI hailed her on the team com. "The warden has locked down the area behind you. You must find another exit route.

"Warning," this time it was the Purgatory's computer spouting bad news. "Power plant damage has led to overload. Core systems failure imminent."

"That's all I need." Shepard grumbled.

"You mean that's all _we_ need." Kryik corrected.

Shepard glanced back at him. She hadn't caught the subtle change at first, but as it sunk in a smile spread on her lips. She gave him a nod with narrowed eyes and steel resolve, the close lipped smile remained.

They passed through a short 'U' shaped hall. Warden Kuril was ordering a lock down of cell blocks four, seven and eight. Kryik was pretty sure they were entering cell block four, but couldn't say for certain. The guards inside were much more prepared than the previous ones. There were no loosed criminals available either. They were the only targets for the Blue Suns to shoot at. This did not bode well with him. He and Shepard took cover together behind a set of concrete barriers, providing suppressing fire for Vakarian as he made strafing strides across the open area to cover on the far side, firing his own weapon as he went. Between the three of them, two of the charging Blue Suns mercs met their end. Four more remained, two behind concrete dividers, capped with tall concrete pillars, and two on a catwalk with missile launchers.

Garrus made sure to take the missel launching mercs out first. He waited for the targets to take cover behind the shielded section of the catwalk, which had a conveniently placed canister of flammable materials near by. Obviously these two were not the brightest in the bunch. Vakarian took aim at the canister and fired at the opportune moment. The resulting explosion sent the flaming bodies of his targets scattering in pieces around their position. He allowed himself a satisfied smirk.

"The hull has been breached in sectors 12, 13, and 30. No survivors." Purgatory's computer reported as pleasantly as is it were telling the burning ship that the pie was done.

Shepard concentrated her fire on the batarian, the fist she'd seen since arriving. He was a slick bastard, barely popping out of cover long enough to fire at her. After the first two or three times of using the prairie dog act she'd had enough. She stood up out of cover. Whatever new biotics Cerberus had afforded her, she hoped the one she wanted was in there. It was.

Kryik fell back into cover, his target badly wounded on the floor behind the same barrier as Shepard's batarian. when she stood up from cover he could do little more than look on with wonder. Cerberus had done much more than rebuild her.

Shepard's body stood before him, blue flame licking up her form. Her arms made wide arcs before she was propelled at blinding speeds across the gap between she and her victim. The impact of her body slamming into the batarian from her charge attack knocked him back into the wall of the trough, stealing his breath. Shepard did not wait for him to gain it back, taking his life with a round center to his skull. The batarian's last breath exited his body with an unceremonious groan. Shepard noticed the wounded turian merc that had been Kryik's target, attempting to slink away un-noticed. Shepard made quick steps to cut off his slow escape. He looked up at her, his voice coming through the helmet in a plea for his life. Shepard's intent to kill him faltered. The barrel of her gun wavered. The helmet looked like any other Blue Suns' helmet, but the voice she recognized. It was the watchman from the interrogation cube.

"Please! I was only following orders! I'll leave! I'll leave the Blue Suns! Please!" He begged her.

She was considering it. He seemed sincere in his desire to reform, but it could be because he was about to die. One is likely to believe the lies they tell to escape death. She didn't have to debate the issue. The choice was made for her when a turian foot kicked off the helmet, revealing the bare-face youth within, his bright green eyes locked on hers full of hope and fear. In the second before the rifle butt impacted his skull, shattering it and splattering his brain matter on her armor, Shepard held the terrified gaze of the adolescent male, as an angle might of one about to die.

When Shepard looked up from the cream and blue bloodied mess at her feet she found another set of bright green eyes, cold and calculating. She was at a loss for words, a loss for action. The world seemed to slow to a near stop. She'd never known Nihlus to be so cruel or needlessly violent.

"_He_ would not have hesitated." Kryik told her, pointing to the body with the barrel of his gun.

The chill in his eyes bore into her as if he did not know who she was before he moved on to the next target. She stared at he space he had occupied in shock. How could he know that for sure? How could he judge so completely?

Training took over and Shepard fell against the barrier next to the body to avoid the bullets pinging against her shields. Unexplainable tears ran down her cheeks. She felt betrayed, until she noticed the dead hand reaching for a hidden knife, half unsheathed from the concealed slot in the armor on his leg. The knowledge didn't help the tears. Instead it made them worse. Her vision blurred by the water in her eyes, she stood and continued to return fire at anything in white and blue armor.

The only thing saving Vakarian from becoming a target was his absents from her line of sight. He had taken higher ground with Kryik to converge fire on the heavy mech. Shepard's battle cry caught his attention as she fired fearlessly out in the open at the mercs who had escaped the rounds from his or Kryik's guns.

"Shepard!" Vakarian shouted down at her.

Whether in response to his voice, or the happen stance that she reached the barrier in the same moment, Shepard took cover under the bridge. There was no time to address the issue. They had to survive this first. Garrus rounded the corner of a large crate to fire another overload signal at the heavy mech, hoping to take down it's shields for a penetrating shot.

"Find Jack! Full Alert! Find Jack!" The warden ordered over the intercom.

Kryik held his position against the opposite crate, effectively flanking the gap between them and taking down the biological threats while Vakarian whittled down the mech's shields. He unclipped a grenade when the mech was getting a little too close for his comfort.

"Vakarian!" He shouted, waiting for him to glance over before pulling the pin. and tossing the grenade.

The two ducked away from the gap. Seconds latter debris and matter sprayed through the divide. Kryik leaned out to examine the impact. All hominoid targets in the blast radius were either dead, or mortally wounded. The mech, however, still stood and fired a missel at him. He ducked back behind the crate. The missel impact on his cover provision rocked the floor and moved the crate a good few centimeters. Whatever was in the crate was heavy. He just hoped it wasn't volatile as well, incase the shell proof casing wasn't so reliable.

He didn't wait for the smoke to clear before sending armor penetrating rounds toward the 'clink-clank' of the mech's movement. Vakarian added his own rounds to the attack until the satisfying crunch of the mech's knees hitting the concrete quaked the floor. They ducked again as the servos audibly whined behind them as the tell tale sign of impending explosion.

The blast temporarily deafened them both. Therefore, Kryik didn't hear Shepard's armored feet, clicking on the hard surface up the trough, but he did smell her, even over the scent of burning flesh and smoke. She slowed as she neared him, her armor covered in blood of different species and gore, as was his and Vakarian's. He greeted her with a hand to her tear stained cheek, wiping away the wetness and grim of battle. He made a mental note to ask her why she'd cried. Now was not the time for such questions. He leaned in for a quick press of his forehead to hers. Garrus' words of not being ashamed had struck a chord in him. He was not going to hide anymore

"All guards to cell block one!" Kuril shouted over the intercom.

"There're can't be many left after all this." Garrus mused, gesturing to the cycle of rot and decay beginning around them.

"Perhaps." Kryik said, bringing up his omni-tool.

He ran a scan of the surrounding area. Cell block one was the next block over, and the closest path to the exit and the Normandy.

"We have to go through cell block one to get to the ship, which is the most likely direction Jack will be heading if she wants off this station."

"Great." Shepard grumbled. "So every guard left will be between us and the Normandy."

"Including Kuril." Kryik nodded, holding his gaze steady on Shepard's dark, brooding eyes.

"That bastard is about to find out what we do to people who threaten us." She nodded back, and tightened her grip on her pistol.


	25. Jack

When Shepard, Kryik and Vakarian heard gun shots on the other side of the doors, they assumed that meant Jack was caught in her escape and fighting her way through the remaining guards. The sight that met their eyes when the doors slid open was not something any of them had expected. Warden Kuril was gunning down his own guards in some kind of rage as most of them just tried to run away. The last of those that had arrived thus far met his end quickly with a bullet through his temples. He had been one of the few to take cover and wait for a chance to either get away candidly or make an attempt at the warden. His mind registered the fact that he lay in a pool of his own blood before thought processes shut down and his body slowly followed his brain's death.

The team made a run for cover, but Kuril spotted them, not hesitating to fire at them. He missed, lucky for Garrus, who was nearly the accidental target.

"You're valuable, Shepard. I could have sold you and lived like a king." Kuril called to her, growling his displeasure.

Shepard wondered how this factored into his 'protecting the galaxy' bull shit, seems how she was one of the few doing so. She also wondered who the _fuck_ was in line to '_buy_' her. The Collectors were the first to come to mind. The Illusive Man had told her that the Collectors often took small samples from slavers that had rare genetic differences, usually flaws. She was genetically rare because of her hair pigment, or rather the lack of it. It was a possibility. But why did the Collectors want oddities?

"But you're too much trouble! At least I can recapture Jack." Kuril taunted her and took another shot at the crate she and Kryik hid behind.

"Not happening." Shepard called back. "You're a two bit slave trader and I don't have time for it."

"I do the hard things civil governments are unwilling to do! This is for the good of the galaxy!" Kuril shouted.

"How the _fuck_ is capturing me and selling me off for the '_good of the galaxy_' when I'm one of only a _few_ who are actually _fighting _to _protect_ the galaxy? How the_ hell _does taking me _out _of the game _help in any way_?"

It seemed she got the opportunity to ask the questions that had been gnawing at her. The answer she received where less than satisfactory.

"I _suppose_ you're right,_ Shepard_." Kuril seethed. "It _doesn't_ help the galaxy. But it sure as _hell_ helps _me_!"

More guards entered the room. Under the impression that the dead bodies were Shepard's doing, they attacked her and her team. Meanwhile energy beacons rose from columns throughout the room, providing electrical arcs to Kuril's position creating a force field to protect him from attack.

"Damn coward." Shepard muttered.

Kryik silently agreed. This turian had no honor in him. His intent with this prison ship; a farce. Every word from his mouth should be heard as a lie, even if it was truth. A bare-face never tells the truth unless there is something to gain by it, or manipulate it to his benefit. Growing up around mercs had taught him had taught him that if nothing else.

* * *

Eliminating the first wave of mercs had not been difficult. A concussive shot from Garrus dazed three of them long enough to take them out. The remaining two were less of a threat without the others. The second wave came from the exit on the far side of the room. Shepard and Kryik took the bridge to the second energy beacon. Vakarian used an overload signal to destroy the first, then took the opposite bridge to flank the incoming reinforcements. This proved to be more difficult.

There were groups of divider walls, like parts to a maze tossed were oddly placed throughout the space as if this were a combat training room. Shepard took cover behind the nearest divider wall. One side was open to Kuril, but the force field worked both ways. Her fire couldn't get in, and his couldn't get out. Kryik joined her seconds latter. He had strategically placed grenades around the beacon. The explosion took out the column as well as several mercs running in from the cell blocks. Kryik leaned out of cover, firing his pistol into the chests of his targets. Shepard assisted Vakarian's fire on those playing a deadly game of hide and seek in the labyrinth of walls opposite her. When the last of the mercs finally fell to the floor, the team took cover to take down Kuril. Garrus overloaded the last beacon from his position behind a wall. All three of them fired on the turian merc. His body convulsed with the impact of their fire, his finger reflexively pulling the trigger on his own gun and firing at the ceiling. As his body tumbled into the groove made by the wall and the large crate he'd taken refuge atop, his last words were drowned out by the blood filling his lungs and gurgling in his throat.

Some movement above them in the glass tubes they had walked as they came in caught their attention. It was Jack, and she was making a run for it. Shepard didn't stop to issue orders or make smart comments. The transition from battle to running for the exit was seamless. The boom of biotics and gunfire missing it's target echoed through to them from the walkways. They had to get to her as fast as possible.

Shepard rounded the corner in time to see Jack, pacing the halls wildly and screaming in frustration. Beyond her a lone merc pointed his gun at her. Shepard took aim and fired. The mercs body joined those of his brothers on the floor. Jack turned to her, surprised and ready to fight. Though the look on her face was one more akin to shock that someone had just helped her out, or so it seemed to Shepard. Kryik and Vakarian flanked her a few steps behind her. It was an imposing sight to see the armed human with gun barrel smoking and two turian's armed to the teeth at her side.

Jack took a few steps back when the woman didn't fire on her, and steeled herself for anything that may come. They were probably the ones who'd come in the Cerberus ship. She wasn't going to go with them willingly, but she was unsure if she had the strength to fight them after the battle it took to get this far. She didn't know how long she'd been in cryo, but it was long enough. She was weak, and tired, but she couldn't let it show. She did her best to look threatening, glowering at the Cerberus operatives. It was confusing to see the turians with the human. Cerberus was a pro-human group. Had things changed so much in her time in cryo? It didn't matter. She needed to get the hell off this station and Cerberus had the only way out. Fuck!

"What the _hell_ do you _want_?" Jack asked with as much venom as a desert viper.

"I just _saved_ your ass!" Shepard shot back. Jack was already pissing her off. This was going to be _fun_.

"He was already dead, he just didn't know it." Jack said with a confidence she doubted if she could back up if needed. She paced the hall. "Now, what the hell do you want?"

"We came for you, Jack." Shepard answered.

" sound like a pussy." Jack spat. "I'm not going anywhere with you. You're Cerberus."

"I'm not Cerberus. I'm Commander Shepard, Spectre for the Citadel and a member of the SDA." Shepard said proudly, hoping that her other affiliations were more to Jacks liking.

"You show up in a Cerberus frigate to take me away somewhere," Jack said, glancing at the Normandy out the window. "Do you think I'm stupid?"

"Yes, if you think there's any other way off this station alive." Shepard shot back.

She wasn't going to take this kind of shit from some bitch who obviously didn't realize she was being offered a helping hand. Behind her, Garrus took a step forward.

"We could knock her out and take her." He suggested.

"Or shoot her." Kryik added. He thought that might be easier. It would certainly be faster.

"I'd like to see you try." Jack threatened.

Either option would be an easier and faster solution to the problem, but that wouldn't be a good way to get Jack to want to work with her. No, there had to be some other way. Shepard knew Jack wasn't this stupid, simply because she was still alive. There had to be something Jack wanted. She was just playing tough and holding out for the offer.

"Look, we'e trying to help you. We've got the only way out and there's a seat on board with your name on it, but you're arguing." Shepard said, and crossed her arms. "Word of advice; you won't want to be my enemy."

"They tend to end up dead." Kryik said, with a low sinister tone. His hand rested on the butt of his pistol.

Jacks eyes flicked to the gun then to the fiercely cold green eyes boring into her from behind the white painted face. His gaze un-nerved her, setting a knot in her gut. She'd never felt a star like that. She bit the inside of her cheek to keep her focus. They wanted her, and she wanted information.

"Look, you want me to come with you?" Jack said, taking a few casual steps forward. "Make it worth my while."

"What do _I_ have that _you_ want?" Shepard said, matching Jack's strides.

"I'm betting your ship has lots of Cerberus databases. I want to look at those files, see what Cerberus has got on me." Jack crossed her arms and shifted her weight to her hip. "You want me on you team? Let me go through those data bases."

"Fine by me." Shepard answered. "Miranda's going to have a cow." She thought.

"You better be strait up with me!" Jack threatened with a finger in Shepard's face.

Shepard was tired of the attitude. She grabbed Jacks finger and pushed it out of her face, letting the blue flames of her boitics flare in a display of dominance. She narrowed he eyes at the ones glaring back at her from within their own flames.

"You'd better recognize!" Shepard spat, her street days on Earth sifting to the surface in the face of such angst. "You need to rectify your attitude before I do it for you!"

Shepard held her ground as Jacks biotic display faded to nothing. It was either because she was yielding, which wasn't likely, or she was too exhausted to keep it up.

"Move out!" Shepard shouted in order in Jacks face.

The girl unconsciously blinked, but she didn't flinch. Shepard brushed passed her. At this point, Shepard didn't care whether the bitch followed her or not, but the count of foot steps echoing behind her suggested that Jack had not stayed behind.


	26. Renewed

"So I gave Jack the files she wanted. _professionally_ _expressed _her _disagreement_ with the _arrangement_. It was all very dramatic." Sonya smirked as she emerged from the wash room. "You should have seen the look on Miranda' when she heard the news. It was priceless."

A white towel was wrapped around her athletic frame. She dried her hair with another as she talked. Nihlus sat with his back to her, reading his messages. Most of them were junk. One was from Anderson, making sure the reunion had gone well. Nihlus surmised that Sonya probably had a similar message in her mail box.

"... to talk to you about something." was all he heard of the last sentence Sonya said to him. It was enough to make him nervous. In his experience, conversations that started with that sentence usually didn't go well. He looked up from the screen to find Sonya standing over him, still moist from her shower, with her damp towel loosening from it's tuck into it's self. Her scent was lighter, as she'd just washed, but a little sweeter. Her crotch wasn't far from his face from where he sat at the desk. If the conversation wasn't going to be about or lead to mating, he would have to distance himself from her nearly nude flesh. He got up and descended the stairs.

"Are you running away from me?" Sonya smiled, thinking he was teasing her.

She followed his path down the stairs and leaned against the wall that framed the display case. The thought crossed her mind to fill it with something, but she was't really a collector. What would she put in it?

"No, I'm uh..." He cleared his throat as he attempted to regain his composure. "What did you want to talk about, m'love?"

Nihlus' gaze locked on Sonya's deep, entrancing eyes, clasping his hands behind his back and puffing up his chest. In his mind the towel dropped to the floor and she stood before him naked, alien, and completely irresistible. He felt a tingling warmth building in his gut. Whatever she had to say, she'd better do it soon. He couldn't be alone with her much longer and maintain control. No other female did to him what she did. It was more mental and emotional than physical, but it was powerful.

"When we were on the Purgatory, you seemed... different."

She hesitated. She wasn't sure how to ask him about something he may not even be aware of. Was she being ridiculous to even worry about it?

"We were on a mission. We're all different when we put on the armor. It's part of the job." Nihlus answered. He was unsure what she was trying to ask him.

"That's not what I meant." Sonya paused again, formulating her thoughts. "When you killed the young turian, the one who was going to pull a knife... You're eyes were so cold. The way you killed him was..." She rubbed her arm with the opposite hand, a little nervous to be alone with him now as she remembered the glacial stare and the crushed skull. The armor bearing the gore still needed cleaning. Maybe she would assign a crewman to the task.

"It was a little disturbing." She finished, averting her eyes to the floor.

Nihlus was at a loss. His mandibles fluttered for a second when his heart leapt in his chest. He knew he'd grown harder since her death. He'd hoped that, in finding her, the hardness would melt away. Instead it only hid itself to be revealed on the battle field. Regret filled him for her having seen it, for having it focus on her, even if it were only for the briefest moment. He never wanted her to see him that way.

"I'm sorry... I.."

He couldn't tell her how angry it had made him when he saw the merc reaching for the knife as he begged for the mercy she was considering. He didn't have the words to tell her how lost he'd been without her. He was ashamed of himself for allowing such a thing to happen to him, but he never regretted loving her. Even though she had forgiven him his past, he still carried the guilt for what he'd done, and for her death.

Nihlus slowly crossed the room until he stood in front of her. Her face was even with his as she stood on the stair. Her eyes floated up to his, searching for an answer to change in him. Nihlus let his hand cup her cheek. Her brow furrowed as she nuzzled his palm. Nihlus' own brow plates furrowed as he warmed himself with her eyes.

"I would never hurt you." He spoke softly in the quiet. "You would probably kick my ass if I tried."

He was teasing, of course, and it earned him a small grin at the corners of her mouth. He leaned in and nuzzled his forehead to hers. She nuzzled back. It comforted him to know that she still loved him.

"Damn right I would." She teased back. She words were playful, but her tone was soft and tired. It had been a long day.

"Do you forgive me for letting you die?"

The silent worry became words with a voice before he'd realized he'd asked the question aloud. Sonya's eyes went wide with surprise as she pulled back to look at him, then softened to an almost nurturing gaze. Both her hands glided onto his face, cupping his mandibles as she looked at him in earnest.

"I never blamed you, Nihlus!" She shook her head. Her damp hair danced in heavy waves around her face. "You did everything right. I saw you. You did everything you could do to get to me. It wasn't your fault. If anyone is to blame, it's me."

"No! How could it be your fault?" Nihlus placed his hands over hers, curling his rough talons around her delicate fingers.

"It was a human ship that killed Sovereign. I'm the one that drew the attention of the Reapers to humanity. That's why the Collector ship attack the Normandy. And I'm the one who didn't get in the pod. I'm the one who it the launch button."

"Sonya, that's ridiculous. I was in command of the mission. Why aren't the Collectors hunting down turian colonies? And the evac shuttle..." That had been her fault, but it wouldn't help to support her guilt on the issue. "It' doesn't matter. It's in the past. All that matters now is that we're together."

He took her hands in his and pressed his mouth to the backs of her fingers, then held them to his heart. He'd learned the gesture from a play from ancient human culture, directed by Francis Kitt. He'd gone to see the play shortly after her death because of the races chosen for the cast. He couldn't remember the title, but the story had been poignant. It was a tale of rival families, in which the son of one and the daughter of the other were hopelessly locked in a forbidden love. The female's family had been represented by a human cast. The male's family were turians. The fact that Kitt had gotten the actors to work together on such a project had been a feat in it's the end the two killed themselves to be together. The memories and emotions the play had drawn out in him had been almost unbearable. He remembered being unable to sleep for days afterward. Since the story was so close to social and political reality, the play only lasted a week before it was canceled due to threat of riots.

"I know," Sonya sighed. "But it doesn't keep me from wondering if the Illusive Man is right."

"_Illusive Man_?" Nihlus asked. "Is he the reason you're blaming yourself for the attacks?"

"He made the suggestion." She answered.

"I'll_ kill _him!" Nihlus growled. "How_ dare_ he say such a thing!"

"Nihlus, don't kill him. At least not yet." Sonya said, gaining his attention and calming his wrath with curiosity.

"Why?" He cocked a brow plate at her.

"We need his credits." She grinned.

Nihlus chuckled, his anger melted away. Sonya took the last two steps down the stars to wrap her arms around him. The towel fell away at the last second and her bare skin pressed against him. He could feel her heat through his civies. He returned her embrace, letting one hand caress her lower back and settle over one of her shapely cheeks.

The warmth that had threatened him earlier came back as a fire from the burning embers at the touch of her skin at his finger tips. Feeling his desire beginning to prod her stomach, Sonya lead him to the bed.

The earthy scent of him fell on her like a warm blanket. It was musky, bold, but not over powering, the smell of old green spices on a warm summer afternoon. It was a perfume she could never forget. It brought back the memories of every time they'd lain together, the emotions and the passion. This time was no different as he took her in his arms and gently pushed his way inside her, his bodies lubrication easing his entry. Each ridge caressed her in just the right way, sending shivers of pleasure through her. The sensation of his persistence, as he pushed deeper into her, his mere presence inside her, filling and stretching her to accommodate him gifted her with waves of bliss. She moaned, loud and unrestrained, her pleasure as she arched into him. He released his own purrs and growls into the silk of her hair, letting it tickle his face. Her lips wetted his throat with kisses. Her hands finding the bare spaces between plates to caress him as he loved her. His firm, slow thrusts lifted her hips off the sheets and cries of ecstacy from her lips. They breathed each other's air as they nuzzled their foreheads together. His mandibles fluttered when she breathed his name. He pushed her legs wide to see himself pulse in and out of her. Sonya's moans echoed lightly off the walls when she reached orgasm. Her body shuddered beneath. Her hot, swollen sex glistened with his reward. The sloppy wet sounds of their passion fed his lust for more.

He watched her intently as she writhed beneath him, moaning his name and gasping with intense pleasure. He didn't think she had ever been more beautiful to him than she was at that moment. He needed no one else, wanted no one else. She was the one he would grow old and die with. If she went before him... again, he was sure he'd follow soon after with of a broken heart.

As his own apex approached, his thoughts melded into pure emotion. His turian instinct dominated his mind and all cognitive thought was replaced with raw drive. Touch, sight, sound, and smell became his world. His release came like a flood and he sank his needle like teeth into the firm flesh of her trapezius, growling as he buried himself deep within her.

Sonya gasped at the shock of pain, but she was glad to bear the wound. She was his again, completely. Medi-gel would heal the bite quickly and Mordin could provide pain killers for missions. As a trickle of blood stained the sheets by her shoulder, the heat of his seed filled her, making her body tingle.

The euphoria they shared in the after glow of their passion strengthened their bond and their love intensified. His face nuzzled into the curve of her neck, smelling her sweet must. Her hips nestled into the crook made by his legs curled under fell prey to sleep as he held her in his arms.


	27. Morning Before Korlus

The next morning Sonya woke before the alarm sounded. She lazily glanced a the transparent orange display to see the time. She'd woken about half an hour early. As she reached to turn off the clock to prevent the alarm, a sharp pain shot through her from the tender muscle along her neck. She grabbed at the source of her discomfort with a hiss and fell back to the pillow. Beside her Nihlus silently leaned over her and turned off the clock. When he settled back he left his arm limp across her abdomen.

"I'm sorry." He said softly.

"It's okay. I'll just get some pain killers from the doc. I'll be fine." She smiled sweetly up at him. "Stop apologizing for everything, okay?"

Nihlus didn't answer, at least not with words. His mandibles spread in a grin as he gazed down at his lover. He let her press her coral lips to his mouth. The feel of her soft lips against his skin making him wish he could return the gesture similarly. He did the best he could and returned the sentiment by nuzzling his forehead to hers, the grazing his face over hers to nuzzled her neck. His tongue snaked out to lap at the soft skin along her jaw and up to her ear.

His attempt at simply showing her affection was stirring a lust in her he could smell moistening her sex. Her breathing quickened to deeper, more exaggerated whispers. Her hand guided his down to her wetness, showing him how to touch her there. He used the pad of one talon to carefully attempt to follow her tender instruction. The callous skin of his digit must have been pleasing to her, because her whispers became soft moans. He watched with satisfaction as the flesh of her mound blushed bright pink to red. He looked back to her face to see the pleasure written there. Her deep, warm eyes found his as her hand slid up his arm to his face, cupping one mandible.

"I need you." She whispered, her eyes flicked to the hardness that had extended from him.

Nihlus didn't deny her. He kept his eyes locked on hers as she opened herself to him and he settled over her, pushing the length of himself into slow and all at once. He cradled her beneath him as she arched against him, sighing a moan. He purred against her supple flesh, stroking her from within. The quiet sounds of their love sounded as the crashing of waves on the beach in their ears. It was an intensely intimate way to begin the day.

* * *

Shepard stood over the galaxy map, dossier in hand. The krogan, Okeer, was last on the list, located in a Blue Suns camp in the Imir system. She confirmed the route to Korlus with a touch of her hand. Okeer's relationship with the Blue Suns was unknown. Shepard sighed as she turned away from the map, making a b-line for Mordin's lab. The pain from Nihlus' 'love bite' was shooting up her neck and down her arm, making any movement that required that side of her body nearly impossible. The marks weren't red or enflamed, a little medi-gel had prevented any infection of the skin, but she was worried the tissue beneath may not have been so lucky.

The doors to the lab hissed open. Mordin was busy working with samples taken from a lone seeker they'd found back on Freedom's Progress. The salarian glanced up at her as she entered, meeting her over by his desk.

"Shepard, how can I help?" Mordin asked as he input data on his laptop.

"Actually, I need some pain killers." Shepard said, rubbing her neck.

"Pain killers? Why not go to Chakwas?"

"You were closer?" Shepard offered.

In truth she had no idea why she hadn't gone to Chakwas instead. The ex-Alliance doctor already knew of her relationship with Nihlus. She could have avoided trying to explain the wound.

"Humm." Mordin eyed her. "Bite wound possibly infected, should take a look."

"How did you..."

"Faint marks just above color line of uniform." Mordin answered without letting her finish the question. "Healing nicely, but muscle tissue beneath seems inflamed. Come, sit here."

Mordin motioned her over to his stool behind the desk. It looked untouched as if he never used it. Shepard sat using the desk to steady herself. Using the muscle hurt like hell, but it was better than falling on her ass when the stool rolled out from under her. Mordin was readying a few tools for the exam. He glanced over to her then back to his tools.

"Will need to remove clothing obstacles." He advised.

Shepard felt a little odd undressing her upper body for the salarian, but he_ was_ a doctor. His species didn't mate like everyone else and had little sex drive. It gave her some mild comfort, like having a homosexual gynecologist. When Mordin turned back to her he went strait for the wound with pure intellectual interest.

"Ouch!" Shepard jumped when he lightly prodded her.

"Just as suspected. Minor sub-dermal infection. Will take a sample just in case." Mordin nodded and retrieved a needle. "Won't feel a thing, promise." He smiled at her.

"Just make it quick." Shepard grumbled.

She turned away to avoid seeing the needle penetrate her skin. She could handle guns shots, teeth and claws, but when presented with a needled she cringed. It was the same with going to the dentist. She was a bit surprised when the needle was placed on a metal tray, full of her blood and puss from the infection, and she had indeed not felt a thing. She casually slipped her uniform back over her shoulders and zipped it back up the side.

"Here, take these to help with the pain and these for the infection; two every four to six hours. Try to eat something with them to prevent possible stomach cramps."

Mordin handed her two clear, plastic vials. The one for pain was half full of little pink pills. The other held slightly fewer bright orange and green capsules. She popped the cap on the pain pills and dry swallowed two of them. The effect wasn't instant, but she felt better knowing the pulsing agony would soon dissipate.

"Thanks, Mordin." Shepard said and got up to leave, pocketing the meds.

"Other.. medical matters." Mordin began nervously. "Aware that mission is dangerous. Different species react differently to stress."

Shepard noticed he blinked more when he was nervous. It was kind of cute.

"Sexual activity normal stress release for humans _and _turians." Mordin glanced at the floor when he told her this. His face changed to the stern doctor look as he continued. "Still, recommend caution. Warn of chaffing."

"We've always been careful, doctor. Nihlus is important to me. We've been together for a few years now."

"Was unaware that relationship existed previous to your death. My apologies. Inquiry, any incidences of allergic reaction?"

"No, not really. His tongue swelled up a bit when..." She trailed off turning bright pink.

"Future reference, anaphylactic shock a possible reaction in humans to turian physiology. Recommend do not..." Mordin cleared his throat and averted his eyes, "ingest."

Shepard nearly hit the floor. She never imagined having such a revealing or embarrassing conversation with the professor.

"Unsure of experimentation, can forward information to your quarters involving positions comfortable for both species, erogenous zones over views... Can supply oils or ointments to reduce discomfort. Gave EDI electronic aid vid to use as necessary."

"You gave EDI porn?" Shepard asked, unsure if she was going to cry or laugh.

"Don't understand reference. Porn?" Mordin cocked a brow at her.

"Never mind." Shepard said, ready to avoid more embarrassment and get out of the lab. "Uh, thanks, Mordin."

She hardly heard his reply as she vacated the lab. Shepard went strait for the helm. She was cutting it close to make the jump, but she never missed the first jump of the day and she wasn't going to start now.

"Hey, Commander. I got worried you were going to sit this one out." Joker teased as she entered the space.

"You know me better than that. I would _never_ miss our daily chat, Joker." She teased back.

Joker punched in the coordinates, spouting pre-jump stats. The blue arc from the relay reached out for them as they came along side the massive structure and flung them into space. The moment of vertigo came and went as they flew across the galaxy in FTL, dropping out in the white fluff of the Eagle Nebula.

"Thanks again, Joker." Shepard smiled as she walked away.

"_Oh, no_. Thank _you_ for joining us, Commander!" Joker teased. He didn't think he'd ever get tired of their game.


	28. Korlus

Shepard took the elevator up to her quarters to change for the mission. She had decided to have one of the crewmen clean it so she wouldn't have to see the gore again. The eager, young ensign had returned it to her looking like new. She thanked him with a smile and extra rations. That had seemed to satisfy him. Since getting Rupert better ingredients, the whole crew appreciated his cooking more.

Nihlus was sitting on the floor at the foot of what had become their bed in meditation, humming softly. He got up when she entered the room. He was shirtless, wearing only his black civilian pants. He went for the closet behind a seamless panel to retrieve their armor. He couldn't help but to watch her out of the corner of his eye as she striped down to her tank and panties, then he noticed the vials on the low table by the sofa.

"What did the doctor give you?" He asked, a little concerned that there was more than one vial.

"Some pain killers and some antibiotics." She answered casually, taking the under weave suit from it's dewar.

"Antibiotics?"

"It's a mild infection, nothing to worry about." Sonya said, hoping he would drop it and not get all worked up.

"I never should have..."

"Stop it!" She cut him off promptly. "I'm not going to listen to you blame yourself for every little thing. If I say it's okay, then it's okay. Okay?"

She was having trouble staying serious due to her poor wording. From the look on his face, so was he.

"Okay." Nihlus said with a poorly executed sternness.

His mandibles flashed a grin before the chuckle escaped him, breaking down Sonya's barriers trying to contain her own giggles. He'd heard her laugh, but a giggle was something was strange to hear her make such a sound. It was so... _girly_. It was cute, especially with her in just her skimpies.

Nihlus helped her wiggle into her under weave and zipped up the back. In turn, she helped him. The bits that shielded his spurs were much more complicated than anything she put on. She wondered if she would ever get as good and handling his clothing as he was at hers. When the final piece of armor was snapped into place, EDI appeared by the console to inform them that they had reached Korlus.

"Well, here we go again." Sonya said playfully.

Nihlus nudged his forehead to hers, as had been his custom before going on missions. It was like saying 'good luck', 'go team SDA', and 'I love you' (just in case things went poorly) all at once.

"So, who are we taking with us?" He asked as they headed for the doors.

"I was thinking about taking Jack. You know, see what she's capable of." Shepard shrugged.

She knew the pain killers were working when the action didn't set her nerves on fire. She would have to take the antibiotics when they got back. She didn't have time to eat and couldn't afford to risk the mission for stomach cramps.

"Are you sure you can trust her on the mission?" Kryik asked, getting into Spectre mode.

"No, but what can she do? We're getting dropped off on a 'garbage scowl with a climate', remember?" Shepard teased.

"Indeed." Kryik nodded, remembering the Council once referring to Korlus as such.

Shepard activated her omni-tool to hail Jack down in the belly of engineering. She'd meant to go down and talk with the girl, but decided it might be best to let her alone with the data pads for a few days.

"Jack, meet us in the hanger bay. You're coming with us."

"Yeah, whatever."

Jack's reply was very nonchalant on the com. Shepard wondered if it meant she would be there, or if she was going to have to drag her out, kicking and screaming. She would find out soon enough. It was a short elevator ride.

Kryik took Shepard's hand in his as they rode the elevator in silence down to the loading bay. This was something new he'd started making a habit of since she'd been resurrected. She didn't seem to mind. She always returned his grasp, but she was always first to let go when they reached the loading bay. He understood, though. This time it was her ship and she was in charge. That meant maintaining the respect, loyalty and obedience of the crew. In this case, most of the crew were employees of Cerberus. Even though Cerberus had been the one to suggest alien crew members, relations between some of the crewmen and the non-humans aboard were kept strictly professional.

The doors of the elevator opened and, as expected, Shepard released his hand to exit. Jack was leaning against the Kodiak. Both pilots stood in the door way of the shuttle as if to keep an eye on her. The Woky sat sullenly in the shadows, waiting to be returned to Omega. Nihlus had long since gathered his belongings from within it's hull and stored them under Shepard's bed.

"So why are we going to this dump?" Jack asked as Shepard approached.

"To find a krogan war lord." The Commander answered firmly.

She nodded to the pilots and they took their helms. Shepard climbed aboard, taking a seat by the window. The view was one of the best things about space travel. Kryik waited for Jack before following the women onto the shuttle. Jack took the seat across from Shepard, so he sat next to the Commander. Shepard waited for the shuttle to leave the loading bay, bringing the planet below into view, before briefing her team.

"The dossier doesn't say if Okeer is this planet by choice. All we know is that he's located within the Blue Suns base. Assume hostiles."

Kryik brought up EDI's scans of the base on his omni-tool. Most of the map was blank, shielded from sensor readings. Something was better than nothing. At least they wouldn't be going in blind.

"The shuttle will drop us off here." Kryik pointed out the area on the small hollo display projecting from his omni-tool "There's only one clear path from there. Beyond that the details are sketchy. The main path winds around a large debris field, but it ends abruptly at this wall. Almost two kilometers away the scans show a large, mostly intact, structure. It is presumed to be the base where Okeer is located."

"That's where we need to go. Our only goal is to get Okeer and get out. Anything else is secondary, but feel free to take out as many of those Blue Suns bastards as you can." Shepard ordered.

Shepard remained especially bitter toward that merc group in particular for the missel they launched at Garrus' face. If she got the chance, she intended to take out every Blue Suns base she could find.


	29. Outpost 4

The Kodiak moved low as to avoid sensor detection toward the landing coordinates. Her engines whined softly as she slowed upon approach. Dirt and smaller bits of debris swirled and scattered in the air as the shuttle touched down. The hatch opened and a team of three quickly evacuated the hull, crouching down behind a concrete barrier haphazardly laying across the path. They squinted their eyes against the dust hitting them, stinging their skin like millions of tiny needles. Shepard watched as the Kodiak lifted off the ground and soared out of sight. The heavy dregs settled quickly and Shepard took a look around at the refuse around them. The sky was a dull beige streaked with clouds the color of filth. Overhead a large dilapidated ship pass slowly by. Every where she looked there was decay and destruction, waste and old, crumbling structures. The smell was no worse than expected, and just as pungent in her nose. The dingy air was further tainted by a very pompous sounding woman.

"There is only one measure of success. Kill or be killed! Perfection is your goal!"

"Some one likes the sound of her voice." Shepard commented.

"I already wanna kill this person." Jack muttered.

Shepard cocked a brow and allowed herself a smirk. At least she wouldn't have to worry about Jack's loyalty on the mission. It seemed she'd found her own reason to succeed. Shepard glanced up at Kryik. The turian was busy loading his guns with incendiary rounds, ignoring the canned orders. Shepard nodded to the team and they left the barrier, winding their way down the path moving with military precision from cover to cover. The recordings continued to sound over the loud speakers.

"Being hired is merely the beginning. You must earn your place in the mighty army we are building!"

Shepard wondered how much of this crap there was before it cycled back to the beginning. It was getting annoying, fast. They rounded a corner and scaled a crumbling set of steps. Ahead there were more concrete barriers. These looked to be placed deliberately.

"Observation post. They know we're here." stated Kryik.

The team moved swiftly to cover behind the barriers. The Blue Suns mercs were ready for the fight. The SDA, plus one, was out numbered three to one. Kryik had a feeling this was going to be a small group compared to what lay ahead. He took a shot at a merc who popped out of cover to fire on Shepard. The merc had left his right side exposed and it was his undoing. The incendiary round burned through the weak spot in his armor, turning the merc to ash inside his suit.

Jack's biotics flared up around her as she sent a shock wave crashing across the battlefield, scattering the mercs into the air like confetti. Those that survived the fall suffered internal damage and drowned on their own blood while still trying to shoot.

However, one merc was pushed free of the blast by one of his brothers, who took the hit and died for his efforts. The one who was saved crawled away from the onslaught to lean against a makeshift wall. A bullet had hit him during the scuffle and the pain that stung his flesh radiated out from the wound. He didn't know if his friend survived. The thought barely registered as he cradled his wound and swore at the pain. Blood stained his armored fingers. Suddenly the fighting stopped. He glanced up in time to see three well armed people walking toward him, and they weren't krogan. Two women, one scantly clad and covered with tattoos, and a turian.

"Shit, shit! It won't stop bleeding. I'm gonna... son of a bitch!"

The merc complained in his weak attempt to flea. He managed to stagger to his feet before leaning against the wall again, grabbing at the pain.

"His wounds are superficial. Looks like we barely scratched him." Kryik scoffed.

"He doesn't need to know that." Shepard told him. Shepard approached the merc, pistol drawn. It was time to have a little fun.

"I _knew_ it wasn't berserkers, not at range." The Blue Suns merc mentally kicked himself.

He hadn't known a damn thing, but he told himself he did. He glared at Shepard as she walked up to him, her gun in hand, but handing lax at her side.

"You're mercs... or Alliance! I'm not... I'm not tellin' you anything!" He spat.

"You're going to tell me what I want to know, and you're going to do it without a fuss." Shepard told him.

"Why the _fuck_ would I do that?" the merc seethed.

"Because I can make the last few minutes of your worthless life the most agonizing of you've ever experienced. You think this little wound is painful?" Shepard prodded the scratch with the barrel of her gun, making the merc cringe. "I can make you feel that ten times worse. So suck it up, pansy. Talk."

"Okay, okay... I don't know anything. I just shoot the over flow from the labs." He pointed with his head in the direction of the main facility. "The old krogan up there, he's really been cleaning house lately. Jadore hired him to make her an army, but the krogan he creates are insane. So we use them for life ammo training. It's all crap. I don't get paid enough for this shit."

The merc looked up at her with wide eyes when his radio came to life with a demand for a status report and coordinates of the krogan group they were thought to have been fighting. Shepard didn't have time for anyone else's games. She leaned into his face, the barrel of her gun pressed firm and cold against his temple.

"I want your friends gone, you understand?" She said softly. Her dark eyes threatened him through the eye shield like a looming storm.

"Uh, patrol?" The merc nervously answered the call. "The last group... dispersed. Lost sight five minutes ago."

"_Dispersed_? Jadore will be_ pissed_. She wanted a show." The voice on the radio said.

"You asked for a report, you got it! Dispersed!" The merc shouted back.

"Understood. Returning to the labs. Out."

"There, see? I'm helping." The merc muttered.

"If you start limping now, you might find a shady spot before you bleed out." Shepard smirked. She watched the merc limp away with mild amusement.

"Funny, he just about pissed himself." Jack laughed.

"The scare was a nice touch. He probably deserved that." Kryik mused.

"I thought so." Shepard nodded. "Let's go."

* * *

The merc shuffled off toward the bodies of his former team. He wanted to see if the one who'd pushed him out of the way was still alive. If he was, then they could die together. If he wasn't, there was no point in living anyway. The only reason he'd joined the Blue Suns was to follow James. He always followed James, ever since they were kids. They'd stayed best friends even after high school. Started at the same university together, shared an apartment. That's when things changed, when they realized they were more interested in each other than class or girls. Failing college in James' mind left only one option. Mercenary work. Plus, no one fucks with the 'fag' carrying a big gun. They kept their private life private. No one cared enough to harass them, as long as they followed orders. Aaron found his best friend on the ground near the back of the small outpost. His breathing was shallow. A trail of blood stained the corner of his mouth and ran across his cheek, but he was still alive.

"James! James, it's gonna be okay. It's gonna be okay, right?"

Aaron fell to the ground next to his lover. He cupped the stubbly skin of James' cheek in his hand, running a thumb over the strong cheek bone. James lazily opened his eyes. They were glazed over and distant.

"A.. Aaron?" He coughed. "Wha... What are you doing? Get outta here!"

"No, I'm not goin' anywhere. If we're gonna die I want to do it together." Aaron replied.

"What are you talking about? You're fine, ya _pansy_!" James answered with a hoarse tease. He knew he wasn't going to make it. He could feel his body giving up.

"It's just a scratch. You wont bleed out." James offered a weak punch to the arm.

"Then I'm going to get help." Aaron said, decidedly.

He started to get up when James weakly grabbed his arm. Their used to be so much strength in that hand. The lack of it there now told Aaron more than the blood pooling under James' torso.

"They'll never get here in time. Just go." James coughed again, spraying blood on the grimy ground.

Aaron resolved to stay. If James did die, it shouldn't be alone. He sat back down and scooted over to rest his back against the wall. Ignoring the pain, he lifted James into his arms and held him. In the distance more gunfire sounded. The intruders were advancing, but that somehow seemed unimportant now.

"Then I'm staying with you. The intruders are movin' on. You're not gonna do this alone." Aaron said sternly.

James answered only with a weak smile. It took all his remaining strength to touch the freckled face that looked down at him. Aaron was always there for him, following him everywhere, even when he'd gone gallivanting off to join a mercenary brotherhood. He worried about what his lover would do when he was gone.

"Aaron, when I'm gone... promise me you wont' do anything stupid." James croaked.

"Yeah, anything you say." Aaron answered, blinking back tears.

"Swear it!" James demanded.

"I swear." Aaron answered, biting his tongue against anything that would deserve a slap in the face. He took James' hand in his as it fell from his face.

James grinned and relaxed in Aaron's arms. His breath grew more ragged and he coughed up more blood. The end would come soon enough. James kept his eyes locked on Aaron's face, but the gaze went in and out of focus. His skin was pale due to the loss of blood and internal damage. His lips parted one last time.

"Aaron..." James whispered up at him.

"I'm here."

"I love you. I think... I think I always have." James smiled through a cough.

"Man, don't do this."

As much as he wanted to hear it, he didn't want to hear it like this. The fist time and the last time to have James confess the truth in words, and it had to be on his death bed. Go fucking figure.

"Goddamn it".Aaron swore then gave in. "I love you too."

James died in the next breath. Aaron kissed the still warm lips of his lover, then settled his best friend's head on his lap and pulled out his pistol. He didn't stop to think about it. Damn the promise to hell. What the fuck was he supposed to do without James? Sure he could function without him, but it wouldn't be life. He put the barrel to his temples and followed James, as he'd always done, into the oblivion beyond this life.


	30. To The Lab

The last merc fell from atop the wall with a finalizing thud. The large krogan before them turned slowly to face the small team that had assisted him in defeating hid enemies. The armor clad female approached him. Her scent was different than the others. She didn't flinch or raise a hand t him when he came near to smell her. The others behind her pulled their weapons, but a motion from her bade them to put the guns away.

"You... are different. You... You don't smell like this world." He took a few steps back. "Seven night cycles and I felt only the need to kill, but you... Something makes me speak."

"Seven _what_? He's a week old?" Jack asked, as shocked as any of them.

"They must breed them full size, ready to kill. Not much of an improvement over regular mercs if they need training." Kryik speculated.

"Bread.. to kill?" The krogan asked, confused. "No. I kill because my blood and bone tell me to, but it's not why I was flushed from glass mother. Survival is what I hear in my head, against the enemy that threatens all my kind. But I failed, even before wakening. That's what the voice in the water said. That is why I wait here."

"Can you show me the laboratory? I need to speak with Okeer." Shepard asked.

"The... glass mother? She us up, past the broken parts behind many of you fleshy things. I will show you."

With that the krogan turned and headed for a large, heavy looking panel of the wall that blocked their path. He brushed the dirt off his hands and stretched his neck with a side the side motion before taking hold of the steel plate. He lifted it with a grunt and slammed it down to one side, revealing an opening easily two people wide. His bulk filled the gap on it's own.

"Glad he's friendly." Jack commented.

The trio crossed the dusty, blood splattered field to the newly opened door way. The tank breed krogan moved aside.

"You fleshy things are slow when big things are in your way." He said.

"Why don't you come with us? Help us fight to the lab." Shepard offered.

"No." He answered simply.

"A krogan refusing to fight?" Kryik asked, surprised.

"I will fight if they come, but I will not run and I will not follow. I feel it deep that I must wait. I kill, but only here. I am not perfect, but I have purpose." He started to walk away. "I must wait until called. Released."

Shepard let him go in silence. He may have been engineered and possibly suffered some kind of brain damage or deficiency, but he was a unique krogan. She hoped there was more for him than this.

The path ahead was dark with cables and wires hanging down over head. It quickly narrowed as it descended down hill, with no available cover until it opened up below them. Shepard lead the team tentatively inside. Adrenaline coursed through her veins, heightening her senses. She could smell the dirt and grim, the rubber coating the tubes above them, hear their steps in the grit at their feet. She could almost taste the mildew in the crevasses and the rot in the corner. The stench burned in the back of her throat, as she skirted a dead merc.

"I don't like the look of this, Shepard." Kryik spoke low, lightly grazing her wrist as he passed by.

"Stay alert." Shepard advised.

A few steps in they heard voices. Two mercs were panicking. Apparently some of the krogan had gotten loose. More likely the men were simply cowards. She had no longer had the thought than the armored figures of those in question appeared below them, firing their weapons. The SDA returned fire, taking flanking positions as their shields sung with the ping of rounds bouncing off them. The mercs fell quickly, but they were not alone. The heavy foot steps of a krogan pounded the dirt just around the bend. Kryik and Shepard's shields were at half power. The took cover behind a barrier to recharge, firing over the lip at the large armed beast.

"Jack, see if you can hit him with a shock wave!" Shepard shouted to the tattooed woman.

Jack had her back to the wall of the tunnel. The angle of the krogan's fire gave away his position, but the biotic attack would have little to no affect until it's shields were down, and if she gave away her position to fire the advantage of surprise would be lost.

"Fuck it." She muttered, and leaned out to fire on the krogan.

It seemed that his shields had been near enough to failing that the converging fire sent the beast crumpling to his knees. The bulk of his hump tilted the sway of gravity forward and his face panted itself into the dirt.

"That works too." Shepard mused.

"Indeed." Kryik agreed.

They left cover and followed the path over gaps spanned by planks of metal that sounded as if they were going to buckle under their feet. Ahead Shepard saw the krogan that the mercs were running from. There were several and they just kept coming, with guns and flame throwers. Damn, she hated those things.

Shepard took cover beside Jack. Kryik wen a little further ahead of them. The plan was simple. Jack would use her biotics to suspend the krogan and Shepard would like wise throw them over the edge of the walkways and into the abyss below. Any that attack while the process was in action would meed with gunfire from Kryik. It was cheep, but effective.

The battle was not as easy from that point on. They were faced with highly trained Blue Suns with rocket launchers, but adequate cover was readily available for the most part. When given the opportunity, they looted the bodies for ammo and credits. Jedore was shouting over the loud speaker of how she'd paid for competence and wanted the intruders dead. She ordered everyone she had at them. By the time they reached the central building of the complex Shepard's shields were at 20%, Jack had medi-gel smeared over a wound in her side, and Kryik had no shields at all having had taken more than a few rounds to provide cover for Shepard to take out the last of he missel launchers. The doors hissed open and they entered the small lab, ready to fight only to be surprised by who was there to greet them.

"Kryik! Don't shoot! You know me!" The asari in a lab tech uniform pleaded. It wasn't the first time she'd begged Kryik for her life.

"I shut down security cams as soon as I saw it was you. Never thought I'd say it, but I'm glad it's you shooting up the place."

"You're the one I allowed to escape Saren's labs on Virmire." Kryik recalled her face as she spoke.

"Rana Thanoptis." She reintroduced herself. "I had to out run the nuke in a utility pod, but it's still a second chance." She grinned.

"Then you have a good reason for being here?" Kryik asked.

"Don't worry. I'm not wasting the chance you gave me. My work here... is strictly beneficial." Rana defended. "But not for the mercs. Jedore's on a standard power trip. But Okeer is trying to do something good. I can tell. Even if his methods are a little... extreme."

Rana glanced over at a charred body with a huge hole in the rib cage. She remembered cutting through the flesh and bone with while the fames still burned the skin of the victim. The organs had to be fresh and undamaged. The merc was going to die anyway. At least the last thing he did was for a good cause, however unwilling he may have been to give up the organs before he expired.

"Everyone deserves a second chance, right?" Rana continued. "And sometimes giving one pays off. I take care of my debts."

"I agree with second chances. I'm not so sure on thirds. Finding you in a place like this makes me wonder if letting you live was a mistake." Kryik glowered at her. "You don't want that."

"We agree on that." The asari said quickly. "I plan on staying as far away from anything to do with you as possible."

Rana glanced over to the two women with the Spectre. One was in full armor, the other barely wore a thing. It seemed an odd pair to take with him on a mission. The tattooed woman glared at her with a scowl on her face. All she could see of the other was a stern lipped jaw line.

"Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to run like hell before you blow the place or something. I know how you work."

Rana left the room more casually than she had done the first time Kryik spared her. When the door closed behind her, however, that changed. She didn't go screaming of his insanity through the complex, but she did, in fact, run. And she did so as fast as her asari legs would take her, leaping over bodies to get to the escape shuttles. Judging by the numerous dead, she would have her pick.

Shepard watched the asari leave, then turned back to Kryik. She cocked an unseen brown at him. Behind her Jack said what she was thinking.

"That's gonna come back and bite you in the ass one day."

Shepard had to turn her head to hide the grin. As crass as Jack could be, she was starting to like her. She waved her hand through the air, motioning them to move on. She hoped it wasn't much further to Okeer's lab. Even with their scavenging, she was running low on ammo.


	31. Okeer

The doors hissed open. Inside a large krogan stood at a console next to a single tank with a rather interesting looking krogan contained within. The krogan didn't turn and fire on them, so Shepard resisted pulling the trigger. Her suspicions were confirmed when the older krogan greeted her with the arrogance she had expected from Okeer.

"Here you are! I've watched your progress. It's about time. The batteries on these tanks will not wait while you play with these idiotic mercs."

"I take it you're Okeer." Shepard said, holstering her gun. "That's not the smartest way to greet the heavily armed team that just kicked down your door."

"Whoever sent you does not want me dead. No one looks for me without motive. Certainly _not_ he deceased Shepard." Okeer said, finally turning to look at her. "Surprised? All krogan should know you. I'm sure Rana has already revisited your actions on Virmire."

Shepard was not especially surprised. She was getting to the point where she almost expected everyone to know who she was, almost everyone seemed to. As for Virmire, it had not been her call, but she would have made the same decision.

Behind her, Kryik took a step to stand beside her. It had been his mission, his call. He wouldn't let her bear the responsibility alone. She didn't look at him, but he knew she appreciated the gesture, the same way he knew she liked his talons in her hair, or which side of the bed she preferred.

"That was my mission. I made the call. You can't hold Shepard solely responsible for the actions taken on Virmire." Kryik stated, standing proud.

"We did what we had to. I make no apologies for that." She responded. She stood just as proudly with Nihlus by her side. It felt like the old days, like two pieces to a puzzle that fit perfectly together.

"But I approve!" Okeer bolstered.

"Saren's pale horde were not true krogan. Numbers alone are nothing. The mistake of an outsider. One theses mercs have also made." Okeer said, taking a few steps toward Shepard and Kryik.

Hearing Saren's name again brought the memories of the mission. Saren had been dead for years now, but his name still stung him like prodding an wound that hasn't quite healed. He glowered at the old krogan before him, loathing the creature that forced a revisit the past. Perhaps Shepard would decide not to take him, though it was unlikely they would leave this place empty handed.

"I gave their leader my rejects for her army, but she grows impatient. It's time for you to take me out of here."

Okeer had moved to the window that looked down on the tanks below. Each one held one of his rejects, failures. He would not lament their loss.

"What makes you think we came to aquire you? We're here about your dealings with the Collectors. Tell us about your transaction with them." Shepard demanded.

"I see!" Okeer looked back at her.

Mild alarm tickled his mind. He needed to leave this world, or at least his legacy must. Perhaps a bargain could be struck with these infiltrators that had raised the dead.

"Yes, Collector attacks have increased. A _human_ concern."

Okeer eyed Kryik as if to suggest the turian should not be involved, then took steps toward the tank that held his accomplishments.

"My requests were focused elsewhere."

"What did you get from the Collectors? I need whatever you know about them." Said Shepard.

"They are strange. So isolated, yet very available when your sacrifice is big enough. I gave them many krogan. I may have more information for you, but the tech was consumed in my prototype after I determined how to use it without killing the subjects. The deaths were unfortunate, but I only need _one_ success to start the process."

"You're insane, but you know how to deconstruct a threat. We need you to employ your talents against the Collectors. Will you help us?" Shepard said. She was less than happy about the idea of having Okeer aboard, but his skills would be useful.

"Perhaps, but my prototype is not negotiable. It is the key to my legacy."

There conversation was interrupted by Jedore on the loud speakers.

"Attention: I have traced the krogan release. Okeer of corse. I'm calling 'blank slate' on this project. Gas the commandos and start over from Okeer's data. Flush the tanks."

Shepard's hand flew to her gun when a series of popping sounds encircled the room. Steam hissed out from tubes running around the room and ended over the tank holding Okeer's legacy. The krogan warlord turned to the tank, almost smugly.

"She is that weak willed? She'll kill my legacy with a damn valve!" Okeer hung his head, hiding his frustration and potential defeat from the trio with his hump. Then he thought of Shepard. She wanted information on the Collectors. He wanted to save his legacy and get off this wretched planet. He turned sharply to face her.

"Shepard! You want information on the Collectors? Stop her! She'll try to access contaminates in the storage bay!" Okeer shouted.

"We'll take care of Jedore, but you'd better have something useful once we get on the Normandy, or or _and_ your legacy are going out the nearest air lock." Shepard threatened.

"I understand. I will stay... and do what must be done." Okeer told her, turning to his tank with a heavy sigh on the edge of his words.

It made Shepard nervous to hear the krogan sounding dejected, as if he were planning something she wasn't going to like. But there was little time to worry about it. Jedore was in the process of poisoning all of them. Shepard wasn't keen on the idea of dieing again, and not by something like gas released by an arrogant Blue Suns bitch. She lead the team through the door on the far side of the room and down the ramps to the tank bay. They could hear Jedore on her com through the doors.

"I don't care who they are! This is my work! I'll poison them all!"

Jack turned to Shepard with a dark smirk on her face. Blue flames licked her corners of her eyes narrowed as she held up her gun, ready for a fight.

"I think it's time to shut this bitch up." Jack nodded toward the doors.

Shepard nodded her agreement with her own smirk. It seemed she and Jack were going to get along just fine, but she was still going to keep an eye on her. She wasn't going to rely on Jack finding her own reasons to cooperate on every mission.

Shepard hit the controls and the doors hissed open. Jedore might not have expected them, but she was certainly ready for them. In her arsenal, Jedore had a heavy mech and more than twenty krogan rejects that she released two at a time, along with a missel launcher. It was going to be a hard fight.

"Take out that mech!" Shepard ordered.

Jack hit the YMIR with a shock wave, knocking a krogan off balance along the way, then ran for cover behind the tanks lining one side of the sunken floor centered in the room. The missiles fired by Jedore impacted against the tanks, killing the krogan inside. The tanks opposite them opened, releasing more tank breeds, complete with armor and weapons.

Kryik attempted to overload the mech's shields with a signal from his omni-tool. He kept his back to one of the pods to help shield him from the missile attacks, leaning out after impact to fire on the mech. He changed positions to another pod, trying to lure the mech into the path of one of Jedore's missiles.

Shepard noticed what he was trying to do and risked a shot at Jedore, narrowly missing a round aimed at her head from an approaching krogan. She succeeded in gaining Jedore's attention, making sure to keep it by firing on the Blue Suns mercenary between pods.

"Jack, keep that krogan off me!" She shouted the order.

Jack didn't hesitate and send a shock wave booming across the floor, following up with rapid gun fire from her sub-machine gun.

Shepard continued to draw Jedore's attention, enraging the woman until her line of site targeted on Shepard, just beyond where the mech was attacking the pod that Kryik hid behind. The missile was thrown off course by the heat from the mechs own missile launchers, hitting the mech. The resulting explosion knocked everyone to the shaking ground.

Jack recovered fastest, not being encumbered by armor. She took the opportunity to unload her gun into the face of the toppled krogan. There was little left but a bloody gore filled hole when the gun clicked empty.

Shepard made a run for Jedore, dodging the missiles that she angrily fired at her. Kryik headed in the opposite direction to cut off Jedore's escape, should she try to run, and flank her position. As soon as he topped the stairs Shepard's warp wave hit Jedore, knocking her back into a stack of crates. But Jedore was an experienced merc, and kept her launcher on target. In that second before she launched another missile, Kryik shot a incendiary round into the back of her head, severing the spinal cord from the base of skull.

Jedore's hair caught first. Then the skin on her face. If she had time to think a coherent thought, perhaps she would have lamented not wearing a helmet that day. Instead her over confidence and zealousness turned to ash with the rest of her flesh as it burned from her bones and her screams from her throat before they could be heard.

Suddenly alarms blared from above them in the labs. Shepard swore, running to meet Kryik where he stood waiting. He brushed his forehead on the relative spot on her helmet before they descended the stair. EDI's voice came urgently in her com as they ran across the floor to Jack.

"Shepard, the lab alarms coincided with a systems failure. The remaining lab systems are unprotected. I have gained limited access. According to the scans, the lab is being flooded with toxins. Okeer's life signs are failing. I recommend haste."

On EDI's heels the facilities computer spouted it's own warning.

"Contamination detected. Emergency vent in detected. Emergency vent in progress."

The team ran up the ramps as fast as they could. Shepard initiated the storm capabilities in her armor to move faster. The doors to the labs opened and what she feared had already happened. Okeer was slumped on the floor by his console. The fluids leaking from his mouth and lack of growling breaths being taken told her he was dead. Overhead a large screen displayed a repeating message, Okeer's last words.

"You gave me time, Shepard. If I knew why the Collectors wanted humans, I would tell you. But everything is in my prototype. My legacy is pure. This... one soldier, this grunt, is perfect."

"Why would someone so fanatical sacrifice himself for one krogan?" Shepard wondered aloud.

"He looks like he could kick some ass." Jack said as she eyed the beast within the tank.

"We could always use another heavy hitter, but how do we know he'll be a team player? He as no past. As far as we know he has no wants. What do we do if he gets out of hand? A 'pure krogan' could be more than we bargained for." Shepard said.

"We'll never know if we leave him here. At least this one isn't under anyone's control. If nothing else, we can hand him over to his own kind." Kryik suggested.

Shepard wondered if his 'own kind' would accept him. His creator was not well liked. Quite the opposite was true. Okeer was hated by other krogan. What wold they think of his creation? Would they even accept him as an individual. He was parts put together with DNA for several sources. He reminded her of herself. Was she even human anymore? With everything inside her, keeping her together, helping her live... She averted her eyes from Kryik when she noticed his gaze on her. It was as if he could feel her thoughts. His face had been stern and soft all at once. Was she that transparent to him, even after being apart from her for so long?

She turned away, pushing her paranoia aside, and contacted the Normandy.

"Okeer is a no go, but we have a package for pick-up. And he's a big one!"


	32. Should've Watched the Vids

Shepard left the com room and took the path through the armory to get to the elevator. Jacob and Miranda had both expressed concerns about having the 'baby' krogan on board, and even more about letting him out of the tank. As she rounded the doors out of the armory, Kelly waved her over. Shepard had yet to have a conversation with the yeoman beyond her name and duties. She hardly needed someone to tell her when she got a new message and even less to be evaluated for mental instability. She could tell the proverbial _'them' _that herself. _Of course_ she was mentally unsound. She'd been woken up, rather rudely, from being dead for two years, only to be told she was pieced back together by an organization she tried to destroy. And it was all just so she could be thrust into battle for the lives of humanity and the galaxy... again. So if she had a few moments when she wasn't completely in her right mind it was an understandable, if not a forgivable, offense.

Shepard walked over to Kelly and greeted her politely, making sure to appear as calm as possible. She had a feeling that, out side 'doctor' patient conversations, Kelly was likely an avid gossip.

"Yes, Kelly?"

"You have a new message on your private terminal." Kelly said with as much chipper as a squirrel that has a tree full of nuts.

"Thank you. Is there anything else I should know about?" Shepard asked.

"Nothing right now." Kelly smiled.

"Okay."

Shepard turned and left without further word. She had other things on her mind than forming a friendship with the councillor. She took the elevator up to her quarters. Inside, Nihlus had set out two plates, blue for him and red for her, on the low table by the sofa with a variety of fruit. She flopped down on the edge of the sofa and let herself fall over and spread out on the cushion. Nihlus sat at the desk nearest the bed, reading his messages, and hers. She preferred not to sift through the junk and let him update her on anything important. She stretched on arm out to reach for an odd looking fruit on Nihlus' snack plate. The skin felt leathery to the touch. She wondered if most things from the turian home world shared the texture. The coloring didn't look natural, or like something one would want to eat, being a very dull and sickly looking grayish green. She tentatively put it to her nose to sniff it. The scent was surprisingly sweet and familiarly citrusy. She wondered what it tasted like.

"It's bitter." Nihlus guessed her question.

He was standing a few steps away. She'd been so lost in her own mind she hadn't noticed him or heard him stir. He sat down by her head, slyly peeling the fruit from her finger tips, and bent down to nuzzle her forehead in one fluid motion. She smiled up at him amused and charmed by his, so far, convincing attempt at suavity.

"It's also meant to have the outter layer removed before eating." He grinned and put the fruit back on his plate.

"I didn't know you liked things that were bitter." Sonya teased.

"On occasion a bit of a bite is nice." He teased back.

He took the clear vials from his pocket and shook them over her head to remind her to take them. She hadn't noticed the dull roar of pain until he reminded her of it. The matters on her mind had distracted her from the pain. She opened her mouth and watched as he momentarily struggled with the caps, then dropped the meds onto her tongue. She dry swallowed, then open her mouth wide again making an "Aaaah" sound.

"See? All gone." She smiled playfully.

"I didn't have any doubts." He looked down at her, mildly amused and slightly confused. He cocked a brow plate at her.

"Oh, never mind." She giggled.

Nihlus mandibles spread in a grin as he stretched over her to retrieve an apple from the red plate, leaving the vials in it's place. He rubbed a thumb over the smooth red surface, as she had done with the kique, and dared to sniff it. It smelled much sweeter than the kique and less citrusy. He offered it to her, curious, but not interested.

"I believe you're supposed to eat something with that." He eyed her. He'd read the labels.

"Glad to know you can read." Sonya teased, taking the apple from him and removing a bite. "Whatever would I do if you weren't here to take care of me."

"Hummm... It's more like what would _I _do if I didn't have you to take care of." Nihlus played.

The truth to his words made the tease fall flat. Nihlus averted his eyes and Sonya took another bite to fill the silence. The subject was resolved, but they never talked about anything he did during the time she was being reconstructed, including missions. They just did there best to act as if there had been no gap in the time line. It seemed easier to deal with the reality of her absence and reappearance that way. At least she thought so. When Nihlus looked back down at her, she could see a question in his eyes.

"What is it?" She asked.

Nihlus offered another grin. He let the backs of his talons graze her cheek and float down to her hair as it fanned out over the cushion. His bright gaze considered her features for several moments before he answered.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine. The antibiotics will..."

"That's not what I meant." He cut her off, shaking his head. "I meant; how are you dealing with the stress? Coming to terms with being dead, and Cerberus... I know it's been bothering you."

Sonya sat up, resting the apple in her hand on her lap. Her dark eyes looked at him, searching for something.

"How can you know what's going on in my head?"

"We've been together a few years. I think I know something of your mannerisms when you worry."

His features were caring, but firm. She was silently thankful that he hadn't mentioned the gap in that time. He was right, of course. He had a habit of being right.

"On Korlus, Okeer's legacy... it made me question my own... I don't know." She shrugged. "Who or what I am. Am I even _me_? How much is biotics or cloned organs, cybernetics? How can I be sure I'm really me and not a _machine_ with skin?"

Nihlus' features softened. He put an arm around her and pulled her across the cushion to him. He carefully brushed a few stray hairs away from her face, then nuzzled her forehead. His hand cupped her cheek, caressing the pinkness there, then he pressed his mouth to her lips in the gesture of a kiss.

"_I_ know." He said. "I know because of your scent, the way you move that can't be mimicked. Your unpredictable tongue."

He'd meant the words that sometime spewed forth on a mission, having the example of the poor merc from outpost 4 in mind. _She_, however, had taken it as an invitation to be spontaneous with the organ. Her hand let the apple roll to the floor, joining the other to work at the folds between his hips that housed a very exciting part of his anatomy. She'd watched the vids in clips a few minutes at a time when he was in the shower or tending to other needs. She had been looking forward to the opportunity to practice some of her new found knowledge. She stroked the crease of his folds gently, using the fabric of his pants to help her fingers glide over the surface. The purr the action stirred in his chest rumbled through him and into the cushion. Sonya smiled at her own aptitude.

"That's not what I meant, Sonya." Nihlus protested breathily.

He purred again, closing his eyes and resting his forehead against hers. His fingers laced into her hair. His arm around her shoulders shifted to her waist, tightening his grip on her. The tingling sensation cause by her worry of his folds quickly built up a heat in his gut and got the moister flowing. The hardness within began to push it's way out, eager for attention. Sonya's fingers were happy to supply it. She gently kneaded the heat of him, working the fabric in slow circular strokes. Nihlus' grip on her hair tightened as more of him became available to her.

"_Ah, spirits_..." Nihlus panted. "Where... where did you learn to _do_ this?"

"Mordin's vid." She replied softly.

"Remind me to thank the good professor... _ugh..mmm_... then shoot him."

Sonya giggled. The pleasure she was getting out of seeing Nihlus turn to putty at her touch was the most fun she'd had in... well, years. Her strokes became longer as more of his length protruded from him. When it became apparent his clothes were not going to be able to handle the strain, he quickly removed them. They moved to the corner of the sofa so Nihlus could lean back. He repositioned himself for her access, propping one leg against the back of the adjoining sofa and the other on the ledge of the low table. Sonya settled between his knees, gently encouraging him with her lips on his throat to relax and rest his head against the wall. He did so expecting her fingers to return to the thing that throbbed at her. When he felt something hot and wet instead, he nearly climbed the walls.

"What the...?"

His head snapped back to see her mouth around the end of him and the rest sheathed in each of her hands. No one had tried to do that before. She looked up at him, surprised by his reaction and a little concerned. Her brow furrowed as she removed her mouth from him, a string of saliva and his own lubrication draped from her lips to his member.

"Did I do something wrong?" She asked, innocently.

"No, no!" He answered quickly. Too quickly judging by the grin that spread on her face. "It's just... _new_."

Sonya giggled again. It made him want her mouth back where it had been. Now that he had a better idea of what was happening, he relaxed back into the sofa. At first he watched her. It was so strange to see that part of him used in this way, but damn it all if it wasn't exotically arousing. He let the purrs flow freely from deep within his chest.

Sonya took him as far as she could into her mouth, stroking the rest of him with her hands in rhythmic, pulsing circles. His bodies natural lubricant allowed her fingers to glide over the ridges with ease. The taste of him was strangely sapid, though she was mindful not to 'ingest', as Mordin had warned her. However, Mordin had not warned her, and she had not yet reached that section of the vids, where upon ejaculation turian anatomy had a peculiararity that was usually not seen and almost never felt when in it's traditional place during mating. She felt something tickle the back of her throat. When the fluid of his orgasm began to pulse from him, she assumed that was what she felt. She let the tasteless ejaculate spill from her mouth while she enjoyed the moans of her lover. But the tickling became more aggressive as he reached the hight of his apex. His talons dug into the tops of the sofa and something in her mouth was trying to grab hold of her tongue. Sonya pulled back, unable to contain her alarm. She nearly fell off the sofa when she saw the dozens of thin, wispy tendrils searching the air for something to latch on to, the center of which was still spitting turian seed.

Sony wiped her mouth off on her sleeve, staring in shock at this unknown feature. Nihlus eventually stopped shuddering from the intensity of the climax. When he did, and the cum stopped coming, the tendrils receded back into the urethral opening. Nihlus then looked at her, dazed and _very_ satisfied.

"That was _amazing_! I never thought something like that..." He noticed the strange look on her face. His brow plates lifted with concern. "What's wrong?"

"Was that... what _was_ that?" Sonya asked, absently rubbing her throat.

"What was what?" Nihlus asked, confused.

"When you orgasmed some..._ things_ came out of you and tried to grab my tongue!" She said bluntly. She couldn't think strait, much less formulate a delicate sentence about something that, quite frankly, had scared the _fuck_ out of her.

"That always happens." Nihlus replied, still confused. "You've just never seen it before. It's normal. You didn't know?"

"_No_, I didn't _know_!" Sonya nearly shrieked. "There was nothing in the vid! I've never_ felt _it before..."

"Ah. Okay."

Nihlus nodded and gathered up his pants to cover himself, hoping to make her more comfortable, and motioned for her to sit next to him. She did, if not a little nervous, still eyeing the bulge of cloth at his crotch. Nihlus wrapped on arm around her.

"Turians," He began as if giving an anatomy lesson to elementary students. In a way, he was. "have an extra organ unique to their species. That's what you saw. It appears during the ejaculatory stage of sexual activity."

"You're starting to sound like Mordin." Sonya grinned.

Nihlus grinned back. At least she was relaxing. He couldn't imagine how it must have been for her, not knowing and finding out in such a way. He had to clear his throat to keep from laughing.

"Sorry," He apologized. "Uhm, basically it's function is to grab hold of the cervix and insure that the seed is implanted into the female's uterus, increasing chances of conception."

"You still sounded like Mordin..." She trailed off in thought, mulling over the new information. "So when we're... and you...the tingling feeling is...?"

"Yes." He answered, again trying not to laugh at her.

"That's..."

Bizarre, disturbing, creepy... There were any number of words she could use to describe her initial thoughts of his alien appendage. One she'd never known about in the years they'd been together. She wasn't exactly sure how many years it had been. Time seem funny now, a little off. It didn't really matter. They were together now and she loved him, even with the strange, if not interesting, extension.

".. unique."

She mentally kicked herself for that being the best she could come up with. She eased up on herself when Nihlus started laughing. At least he had a sense of humor about it. His laughter tickled a giggle out of her, that evolved into a laugh. Gradually their jollies died down to a chuckle. Nihlus slipped a hand up to her cheek and gently turned her face to him. He lovingly pressed his forehead to hers, finding more reasons to want to be with her. The two of them sat with dopy grins on their faces, looking into the eyes of the other. Sonya suddenly realized it didn't matter to her what odd thing she might learn about him, she would always love him. He was alien after all. There were bound to be some unknowns. She leaned in to kiss him. His mandibles were still spread in a grin that fluttered when her lips touched his.

That night she bedded him with a heightened sense of how different he was from herself. How exotic and enticing he was. It was the first time she mated with a turian, as well as made love to Nihlus Kryik. When the tingling sensation gripped her, quite literally, she thought about it in a different way. Not only was he buried deep within her, but holding her inside and out. It was strangely arousing. The curious thoughts, along with a renewed appreciation for the pleasure he brought to her body, sent her crashing into the ocean of ecstacy more times than she had cohesive thought to count. She fell to sleep, sighing in his arms, nuzzling her face into the soft, leathery skin of his throat as she listened to his contented purrs.

* * *

**I realize that the 'new organ' may be a bit much for some. I'm just trying to think outside the box with realism of an alien species. Feel free to dislike it, and comment as you wish. But there's no need to be insulting or rude. I have received only one such comment and it has been deleted. I am open to criticism, but if it can't be given with some dignity of the commenter I will delete it. Thank you for reading. I hope one chapter will not deter you from continuing to read. ^_^**


	33. Opening The Tank

Ebony eyes fluttered open just as drowsy emerald gems blinked back at them. The lovers exchanged grins in their own fashion before greeting each other with nuzzled foreheads and a cuddling arms. Sonya nestled her face into the comfort of this throat. Nihlus draped a leg over hers and pressed his mouth against her hair, breathing her scent. His soft, contented purrs rumbled deep in his chest and reverberated through her. She sighed happily until the alarm sounded. Nihlus rolled over her to turn it off. He settled lazily back beside her, leaving a little more of himself on her than the bed. He enjoyed the full body contact with her almost as much as he enjoyed their love making. Usually the one led to the other, but it seemed Sonya had other plans for the morning.

"Kelly said I had a message. Did you read it last night?"

"Yes," Nihlus nodded. His hope of a little morning loven' dwindled away. "The Illusive Man warned against opening the tank, but ultimately it's your decision."

"That's it? Uhg, that man... " Sonya grumbled. "He constantly reminds me of things I already know."

Nihlus eyed the faint scars of his teeth on her skin. The swelling of the muscle beneath seemed to be dissipating, but he wasn't going to let her risk her health. He left the bed, feeling her curious eyes follow him as she sat up. He went to fetch the vials and another apple. He took the extra time to toss the old one on the floor in the trash. He took her hands in his and pushed the vials and the fruit into them, pressing his forehead to hers.

"Take them. Eat. I'll wait for you in the shower."

Sonya watched him cross the room, smiling to herself, admiring his swagger. Damn he was sexy, with his broad shoulders and the way his narrow waist curved with his movements. She popped off the caps to the vials and dry swallowed. She took the first bite of apple as his foot hit the first step.

Nihlus took the steps in stride and disappeared into the wash room, ginning to himself, knowing she was watching him. He turned he water on hot, gradually adding cold to his taste. Stepping under the rain of cleansing heat, he let the droplets run down his body. The memory of the first time she'd visited him in his quarters tickled his mind. She had called him 'magnificent'. The sentiment must have carried over to his nude form, because she had not hesitated to mate with him. Knowing he was attractive by turian standards hadn't meant much in his life. Knowing _she_ found him so gave him a security and a pride he'd not known. Having her love, the bond they shared, it made him whole.

These thoughts and emotions lit up his features when she finally joined him on the white tiles under the shower head. With her arms wrapped around his neck and her fingers caressing his fringe, he expressed his love to her body with all the passion and tenderness he felt in his heart.

* * *

Shepard took the elevator strait to the engineering deck. If the Illusive Man was nervous about opening the tank, then that was exactly what she was going to do. Her thoughts wandered to Nihlus before she reached the deck. He had tried to beat her to the door, to open the tank himself and thus protect her from potential danger. But her clothes were faster to put on than his. She knew he would be down to follow her as soon as the elevator became available. Until then he was stuck in her cabin, unless he took the maintenence tubes. She wasn't sure if he would fit in them. They got a little tight in places.

The elevator doors hissed open and she stepped out onto the deck with purpose. The krogan's tank was being held in the port cargo hold. She wondered if this krogan would be like the one they met in the training fields. She would find out soon enough. The doors to the hold hissed open. The tank loomed in the corner of the brightly lit room. Inside the liquid filled tube there was a fully armored, pinkish faced, male krogan. His face plate was not one solid piece like other krogan she'd seen, or as brightly colored. Instead it was a stone grey and made up of several smaller pieces until the crests rose up over the brows and center of the head. He also had smaller plates, or scales on the tip of his chin. She wondered if that was how infant krogan emerged and the plates grew together to form a solid piece latter, loosing the ones on the chin. The rejects had come forth fully armored. How Okeer had grown them into armor was a mystery they may never solve. But this one, his armor hung on the outside of the back of the tank. Shepard couldn't help but star at his quads and rather intimidating member that was just as pink as his face. EDI interrupted her thoughts as she got closer to the tank.

"The subject is stable, Shepard. Integration with on board systems was seamless."

"Stand by. I'm gonna open the tank and let him out."

"Cerberus protocol is very clear regarding untested alien technology." EDI told her.

"I'd rather let him out now, and give him time to acclimate, than open it out of necessity and have a bigger problem." Shepard replied. "Open the tank."

"Very well, Shepard. The controls are online. The switch... and consequences are yours."

Shepard approached the controls. She examined the krogan one last time. He was a big one. She hit the 'wake' sequence into the panel and took a few steps back as servos whined and the liquid in the tank drained. The security bars raised and the semi-circle glass plate slide away. The krogan fell to his hands and knees, coughing up the fluid that had been his life line up onto the smooth, white floor. He stood seeming dazed, but he was huge. He looked much bigger out of the tank. His eyes were a piercing bright blue. As he looked at her he seemed to focus. Shepard took a well meaning step forward and gave him a wink. Later she would wonder if that had been what set him off. The next thing she knew he was growling a battle cry and charged her. He flung her against the crates along the wall like a rag doll, pinning her. His piercing blue eyes burrowed into her with a fierce, unfocused rage.

"You, human." He addressed her gruffly, then sniffed her and roughly grabbed at her breasts and crotch.

"Female."

In her mind, Shepard started to panic. She really hoped this thing wasn't ready to mate. That wasn't somewhere she wanted to go, ever. She'd already got a good look at the battering ram that would destroy her if he tried.

"Before you die, I need a name."

"I'm Commander Shepard, and I don't take threats lightly." She growled at him. "I suggest you back off."

"Not your name... Mine." He spoke softly.

This surprised her. She'd not expected the 'new born' to request an identity from her. Yet, he didn't let up on his grip on her. His arm press hard against her chest making it difficult to breath. Her hands had gone up reflexively to defend herself. It took all her strength to keep his arm from crushing her throat. His knees pinned hers to the crates. He left the other hand free. This made her nervous, despite his threat to kill her. He never said what would happen between life and death.

"I'm trained. I know things." The krogan continued. "But the tank... Okeer couldn't implant connection. His words are hollow. Warlord, legacy... grunt." He paused considering the words. "Grunt was among the last. It has no meaning. It'll do."

He leaned his face into hers, turned slightly so that one eye look at her intently.

"I am Grunt. If you are worthy of your command, prove your strength and try to destroy me."

"You could join me. My enemies threaten the galaxy. They are worthy opponents." Shepard told him.

At that moment Nihlus left the elevator and headed briskly down the hall. He wanted to be sure nothing had gone wrong. He couldn't see their position through the windows, but he could see that the tank was open and sans krogan. He didn't recall seeing her grab a weapon on her rush out the door, so as a precaution, he'd brought his own. Quickening his pace he readied his pistol. The doors to the cargo hold hissed open. Nihlus ran in, ready to fire. He could see the scuff marks on the floor and the liquid from the tank had tell tale signs of rapid movement. The crates along the wall had shifted as if impacted. Shepard's face was flush, but her posture remained one of a captain. She smoothed a few stray hairs back and looked at him as if he were intruding on her while she was on the toilet. The krogan stood a few steps away from her, glaring at him as most krogan did. He holstered his weapon.

"I take it the situation is under control?" Kryik's eyes locked on to the krogan, but he spoke to Shepard.

"I've got this." Shepard assured him.

"This turian," Grunt spoke up unexpectedly. "You carry his scent on you."

Grunt's gaze moved to Shepard then back to Kryik. He seemed to become even more agitated. Maybe it was something Okeer had imprinted, some point-of-view or memory. Perhaps it was simply knowledge that turians had a hand in the genophage. Either way, Shepard wasn't too fond of the threat to the delicate relationship they'd only just established.

"Kryik is a commanding officer on this ship and my right hand. You will show him the same respect that is expected of you toward me. I also have another turian and a salarian on board. There will be no disruption on my ship. If you have a problem I'll put a bullet in you right now and save myself the trouble." Shepard said with all the authority and power one might find in a krogan warlord.

"Nothing in the tank indicated humans could be so forceful. You command as though you earned it." Grunt replied.

"Shepard has earned the right to captain a fleet." Kryik interjected, bringing himself to full height and clasping his hands behind his back.

"That is... acceptable." Grunt nodded to her. "I will fight for you. I hope your enemies are as worthy as you say or I will have to kill you."

"You don't have to worry about that." Shepard said.

She headed for the door. She'd had enough krogan for one day. Kryik followed after her seconds later, making sure 'Grunt' didn't decide to charge at them as they left. When he join Shepard on the elevator his Spectre demeanor dropped like a stack of books.

"He was naked! Was he like that in the tank?"

"Yes!" Shepard laughed. "I thought you were more observant than that." She teased.

"Hummm. Perhaps you distract me more than I'd like to admit." He teased back.

"Flattering me won't save your ass. Anyway, he has armor. Hopefully he puts it on. I don't need to see that again."

"I don't think anyone on board wants to see that." Nihlus added. "Do you trust him?"

"I think he'll be loyal as long as we give him targets for his aggression. We don't have to train him, so any missions that might need a heavy hand... He'd be our guy." Sonya answered.

Nihlus slipped his hand over hers. She gave his fingers a squeeze before they reached the command deck.

"Where to now, Commander?" He asked softly.

"I'm not sure. Though, if I know the Illusive Man at all, I have a feeling he'll let us know soon enough."

The elevator doors opened and Shepard released Kryik's hand. Shepard stepped toward the galaxy map while Kryik headed to Mordin's lab. She hoped it was to check on the upgrades and not shoot the professor. Yeoman Chambers promptly alerted her to the Illusive Man's request to see her in the com room. Joker confirmed the request on the intercom. Kelly narrowed her eyes a bit in irritation. Shepard grinned a knowing smirk and leaned in slightly to Kelly's ear.

"Has he been doing things like this a lot lately?" She asked.

"Yes, ma'm. But it's not a problem. I completely understa.."

"I think it means he likes you." Shepard cut her off.

Kelly immediately turned pink in the cheeks. She attempted to start a sentence, but it just came out as tongue tied stammers. So she turned to her console and pretended to do some work while she stood in stunned silence. He liked her? Why hadn't she picked up on that? She was a _phycologist_ after all.

Shepard walked away with an amused look on her face. She would miss Joker's teasing, if he stopped, but she was glad he'd found a nice, single girl to dote his brand of affection on. It might even get him away from the helm for a minute or two.

Passing through the armory on the way to the com room she could see Taylor hard at work on upgrading the weapons with Mordin's new ideas. The next time they docked at the Citadel, or some other major port where they wouldn't be shot at, he'd have to get the new hull plating installed. The Collectors weren't going to wait around for them to be ready. The ships upgrades needed to get done. The thought reminded her that she needed to check in on Garrus' progress with the ships cannons.

The doors to the com room hissed open. EDI preped the room, lowering the console table into the floor and activating the hollo imager. Shepard steeled herself and stepped into the glowing grid of the cube. She saw the burning flare of the end of the Illusive Man's ever present cigarette before he heard is voice.

"Shepard, I think we have something."


	34. Invasion on Horizon

The birds chirped happily in the grove on the hill beneath a azure blue sky. The white fluffy clouds drifted lazily by on the winds in the stratosphere. The gentle breeze scented by the fresh smell of ripening fruit from the orchard rustled the long grasses in waves like a green sea. Below a small human colony bustled about, not sharing nature's calm obliviousness to the alarm of the settlers. Two humans rounded the corner of a prefab structure and headed down the main path, too consumed with their own problems to take notice of the beauty of the cool morning. Their feet stomped down the shorter grass into the the dirt that marked the heavily used trail.

Lieutenant Commander Kaiden Alenko marched with purpose, the colony doctor on his heels. She was plain, but kind. They'd only recently started seeing each other. They kept their budding relationship quiet. The other colonists didn't take kindly to an Alliance soldier being there, believing that trouble was not far behind. In a way that was true, only because the Alliance was trying to protect the colony before trouble arrived. Their efforts were seldom viewed that way and just as rarely appreciated, unless they succeeded, of course. Even then, if the tiniest then went wrong the Alliance was given the blame. In turn, that meant him. It was frustrating, but it was his duty.

"Lilith, we've got a problem."

"_Still_ can't calibrate the targeting matrix?" Lilith replied softly.

"Those defense towers are useless if we don't figure it out." Kaiden said, a scowl firmly planted on his face as worried colonist pushed past him.

"Sorry, Commander. Getting our comm systems back up takes priority."

"Yeah," Kaiden stopped in his tracks. "I'm surprised people haven't tried to blames _that one_ on me too." He huffed.

Lilith stopped and looked tenderly up at him, her brow lifted with gentle concern. Her bright, hazel eyes eased his tension with their subtle calm. She wasn't Shepard, but she was adventurous in her own way. She was a doctor on a human colony in the Terminus Systems. That was pretty adventurous, for a civilian doctor.

"People out here don't trust the Alliance. It's not personal." She told him.

Suddenly the sky grew dark. A low, mechanical boom echoed across the fields to them. A strange shadow cast it's shape on the clouds and grasses. Everyone in the colony looked toward the looming mass that slowly took shape.

"What _is_ that?" Lilith asked the air.

Alenko didn't answer. He didn't have one. Whatever it was, it was trouble. The reached over his shoulder and took hold of his rifle, never taking his eyes from the threat that rumbled in the sky. The tip of something huge protruded through the clouds. Lighting flashed in the sky around the rock surface of the ship. It reminded Alenko too much of the ship Sovereign and Eden Prime. He glanced over to Lilith.

"Get everyone to the safe house." He ordered.

He looked back up the muzzle of his gun toward the ship. Some kind of cloud, or swarm was swirling toward the colony from beneath the monster that was darkening the sky. He steeled himself against the panic that wanted to take him.

"I'll cover you! Run!" He shouted.

Birds flew off in droves. Every living thing that had mere moments ago been resting in the fields ran from the alien intrusion as fast as their bodies could take them. Alenko took aim at the swarm and fired. Fierce bolts of lightening streaked the sky with a loud crash. Behind him a fleeing colonist knocked the doctor to the ground in his panicked attempt to run. Alenko looked back to see if Lilith had gone and saw her on the ground. He offered a hand to help her up and just as she took it, her warm fingers curled around his wrist

Lilith had barely gained her feet when a sharp, stabbing pain pierced the flesh of his neck. He cried out and grabbed at the thing that had attacked him, ripping it from his neck. He sneered at bug like creature in his hand, then violently threw it to the ground. He made a point of stepping on it as he moved to fire. Rage and determination to stop this threat griped him like a vice. He clinched his teeth, glaring up at the ship, but his fingers didn't move. He tried to turn, to shout at Lilith to run, but his body continued to stand there. He couldn't _do_ anything! The panic he'd been trained to control seared his mind, erasing the steel that made him a soldier. The screams stayed within his thoughts, unvoiced and unheard. Unknown to the rest of the galaxy, but his own shame would haunt him in his dreams.

* * *

Lilith tried to run, her fear causing her body to hesitate. Whatever had just happened to Kaiden was happening to everyone who got stung by the invading swarm. She saw Sam, running as fast as he could from the fields. He grabbed her hand and kept running, taking her with him. He cried out suddenly as they fled, then froze. He'd been stung.

In a second that seemed like a year, Lilith hesitated. She wanted to help, she didn't want to leave him or Alenko behind. But if she didn't get to the shelter she would become a victim herself. She ran, to terrified to feel the losses, barley clinging to the cognitive thought that kept basic animal instinct at bay as those around her fell prey to the immobilizing stings of the swarm. She glanced back to see the how many were fleeing behind her and tripped on her own feet. She screamed as a bug landed on her chest and shoved it's large stinger into her agony shot through her like an electric shock, paralyzing her, solidifying her body in stasis. The scream was cut off as she abruptly lost control of her vocal cords. Her muscles hardly functioning well enough for her to breath.

Her vision became fuzzy as she watched colonists run past her only to fall prey themselves. More of the bugs landed on her, crawling over her face and in her mouth. She could feel their scratchy legs and and feet flitter over her tongue and the surface of her eyes. She wanted to scream, to squint her eyes against them. To swat them away and run, but she was frozen in place. The terror that gripped her when the first of many arthropodic feet marched past her took the last shred of control she had. One of the large, bug-like aliens that raided the colony stopped to look down at her with it's many glowing, orb-like eyes. Lilith blacked out from unabated panic and the trepidation of absolute defenselessness against such atrocities.


	35. Fighting Through

Shepard fidgeted with her fingers as the elevator descended the shaft to the hangar bay. Something wasn't right about what was happening on Horizon. There were many unanswered questions and not enough information. She jumped a little when Nihlus reached over to steady her hands in his.

"You're making me nervous." He spoke low in the small space.

"Something isn't right, here." Shepard said, looking up worriedly into his bright eyes and white painted face.

"The Illusive Man has a good point. The Collectors seem to be focused on getting to me. Now they're hitting a colony were Alenko is stationed. Why are they trying so hard to lure me in or track me down? I can't accept that it's a personal vendetta. The Reapers want to harvest all life. Why bother with an individual?"

Nihlus smoothed a hand over her cheek as she rambled on. He hated the Illusive Man for making her feel as though it was all her fault. It was no one's fault. The Reapers were evil and only sought to consume the life of the galaxy. Why they were seeking Shepard was an answer that was likely to be as mysterious as their existence.

"Why does it matter?" He asked aloud. "Whatever their _reasons_, we have to stop them."

He lifted her face to his and nudges her forehead. He kept his eyes locked on hers and held her hand against his chest.

"And we will. I promise."

"You can't promise that..." She whispered, nuzzling him gently.

"Maybe not," He relented, "But I'm going to do my damnedest to make sure we have the opportunity to grow old together."

"You mean you don't want to go out in a blaze of glory?" She teased.

"Not a chance."

It was Sonya's turn to graze a hand over his cheek. She let it rest on the side of his neck as she lifted herself up on her toes to kiss him. His mandibles fluttered in mild surprise, then he took her firmly in his arms and returned her passion. They were still locked in the embrace when the elevator doors opened. Garrus stood waiting by the shuttle. When he saw the private moment exposed he couldn't decide whether to turn away or whistle at them and embarrass the crap out of them. It _would_ be funny, but he had a better idea.

The lovers released each other and walked casually to the shuttle, visibly putting on their SDA persona as they went. Garrus took a step to the side and let them climb in first, making eye contact with both of them as he grinned fiendishly.

"You do realize that we_ all_ have to use that elevator." He teased.

"Is this really the time for jokes?" Kryik reprimanded.

"We were just making out in the elevator," Shepard reminded him. "Everyone has a right to some stress relief."

Kryik didn't answer and decided to let it go. He sat down by the window opposite where Shepard usually sat. Garrus took his seat next to her, straddling the corner of the cushion as he checked over his guns. Shepard searched hard out the view port as the shuttle left the bay. The earth like planet below showed no signs of trouble or that they were under attack. The only thing she could see that was off was a dark,circular cluster of storm clouds near the colonies coordinates.

The NS1 67-001 UT-47 Kodiak landed in the tall grasses just inside the outer walls of the Shepard of the Spectre Dyad Annex waisted little time exiting the shuttle, jumping out before the hatch had finished opening. The Collector ship loomed over her, a monolithic clash of tech and rock.. The storm cloud swirled around it's apex like a crown. It was intimidating, but it did not stir any fear in her. She was done being afraid of the Collectors, the Reapers or anyone else. She marched ahead, assured that her team followed her by the sound of the grass swishing at their passing and the dirt crunching under their heels. Behind them the Kodiak lifted off and headed back to the Normandy. She made a mental note to remind herself that they needed to return the Woky, eventually... maybe. Hell, she'd just keep the damn thing.

"We're ground side." Shepard reported over the com. "Mordin, you sure these armor up grades will protect us from the seeker swarms?"

"Certainty impossible, but in limited numbers should confuse detection. Make you seem invisible to swarms... in theory."

"In_ theory_?" Garrus asked, amused but nervous.

"Experimental technology. Only test is contact with seeker swarms. Look forward to seeing if you survive."

Shepard thought he sounded as if he were running lab rats through cheese maze over lunch. Not the confidence booster she would have preferred. It didn't take them long to run into the Collectors. The bug like aliens flew in on wings like giant cicadas. It made Shepard wonder if they made a crunch if they got stepped on. The thought sent a shiver down her spine. She always hated that sound. They weren't as hard to kill as she thought they'd be. Their only protection, it seemed, was their natural armor. Shredder ammo punched right through. Their weapons were formidable, however. Some kind of laser gun that looked like the same rock that their ships hull was plated with. She wondered if it would be possible for other species to operate the weapon.

Shortly after communications were lost. The Collectors were interfering with the signal. They were on their own. The team rounded a corner in time to see a Collector pushing a large, cocoon like pod hovering in the air, toward the direction of the ship. Kryik fired a shot at the creature, hoping to investigate the pod. He had a feeling it was transporting a colonist inside the device.

He didn't get the chance to see if his bullet hit the target as more Collectors flew in to defend their operations. There were more of them, and thus became a greater threat that the previous group had been merely for their fire power. Kryik ducked behind the nearest available cover, providing Shepard and Vakarian with cover fire. Vakarian took to higher ground while Shepard moved a little further ahead. The first wave of Collectors fell, but reinforcements moved in as seamlessly as waves of water crash together and they brought husks with them.

"I didn't see any dragon's teeth. Where the hell did these husks come from?" Shepard shouted into her com.

"Maybe they brought them from the ship, transformed them from the other colonies. Just shoot 'em!" Garrus answered.

"What do you think I'm doing!" Shepard shouted as she shot one in the face.

It was a nearly constant battle from that point on. The Collectors dropped like flies on steroids and the occasional husk was thrown at them as fodder. Sometimes one of the Collectors would become possessed by some other entity, calling itself Harbinger, that would spout creepy threats. The first time it happened, Kryik was sure the thing had been rigged with internal explosives. Later Shepard would tell him she thought her implants were frying her brain. Tripping over open pods and colonists frozen in stasis, they moved quickly forward.

"At least the swarm repellant is working." Shepard mused.

They found a lone survivor that had not been stung into stasis hiding in a bunker. He had been of little help, offering them a med-pack and bias opinions of the Alliance. He did, however, tell them were to find the controls for the AA guns. Apparently there had been a problem with activating them and that was why Alenko had been assigned there, among other reasons that remained secret. Passed the bunker there were fewer pods and the frozen bodies of colonists narrowed to none. Collectors, husks, and abominations continued to impeded their progress. But they persisted until they had reached the larger doors leading to the control center for the AA's. Shepard hacked them open. The team fully expecting an army of Collectors and their pets between them and the controls. They were surprised when there were none. . Less than a kilometer away the Collector ship towered up into the sky, daunting and harkening to the threat of the Reapers.

"What are they waiting for?" Garrus wondered aloud.

"It could be an ambush." Kryik suggested.

"It doesn't matter if it is. We have to activate those guns and save whoever is left from being taken." Shepard said, and marched ahead, stealing the resolve of her boys and they followed.


	36. Battle Field

Shepard crossed the grassy court yard and mounted the platform. A few long strides took her over to the terminal. She activated her omni-tool and hacked bypass routines to power it up. Kryik positioned himself next to her, his assault rifle resting in the crook of his arm. Vakarian took up a similar position opposite him, effectively flanking Shepard. They could have been steel plated hawks on watch, as they stood guard at Shepard's back. Her fingers moved quickly over the keys to try and initialize the communications array. The signal should bolster her own frequencies. If she could re-establish a link, EDI could get the GAURDIAN guns up much faster.

"Normandy, do you copy?" Shepard spoke into her com.

At first there was only static. Shepard looked the controls over again to make sure she didn't miss anything. Suddenly Joker's voice burst through the white noise.

"Joker here. Signal's weak, Commander, but we got you!"

"Good, it's time to kick these ass holes off our planet" Shepard shouted. "EDI, get the colony's defense towers online."

"Errors in the calibration software are easily rectified, but it will take time to bring the towers to full power. I recommend a defensive posture. I will not be able to mask the increased generator output." EDI warned, almost as an apology.

"They're gonna know we're here." Garrus noted.

"Garrus, take to higher ground," Shepard nodded to the half loaded transport on the far end of the court yard. "Snipe anything that gets too close to the controls. Kryik,"

The Spectre gave her a side long look with a cocked brow. She may be in charge of the mission, but no one was in charge of him. Shepard didn't need to be told what he was thinking.

"I've got your back, Shepard." He said.

She nodded firmly with a bit of a smirk as she ran back across the field and took cover behind a boxed in row of barriers. Garrus took his position the crates near on the truck, resting his rifle on top of one of the boxes. Kryik jumped up and caught the lip of a window to one of the prefabs lining the court yard walls. He pulled himself up and climbed in, providing himself with excellent cover and a clear shot at anything that tried to tamper with the controls. Across the field both Shepard and Vakarian were impressed. Who knew he could jump so high?

"That's hardly fair," Shepard teased over the com.

"War isn't fair. Besides, I can take out anything from here." Kryik replied.

"Here they come!" Shepard warned into her com.

Collectors converged in on their position from the sky, dropping off abominations and husks like organic bombs. With all the experience of his last few days on Omega, Garrus took down the first two husks that were moving in on on Shepard's position. The comforting pop of the rounds as they left the camber focused him mind like a sharped razor. Another shot from the window of prefab punctured through the chest of a Collector threatening Vakarian's flank. Three successive rounds made swiss cheese of the head of a Collector that landed on the terminal platform. Kryik dropped down below the sill to reload his rifle.

Garrus fired on the Collectors as they landed. His turian eyes locking on to them with fierce precision. Those that did not die by gun fire, soon met their end in a blue blaze of biotic fire. But Shepard was becoming restless, hiding behind steel and concrete. She rose from cover and shot a Collector in the face, distracting him. Blue flames encompassed her and she charged toward her enemy with critical speed and power, crushing it's face with her armored head.

"GARDIAN anti-ship batteries at 60%. Synching targeting protocols to Normandy's systems. Continue to protect the tower."

Shepard grinned as she smashed her the butt of her rifle into the vacant face of a husk that ran at her, shooing it in the head as it lay convulsing on the ground.

"Shepard, get to cover!" Kryik demanded over the com.

"There will be more!" Garrus yelled as he blasted the last Collector near his transport cubby.

"Good. Let them come." Shepard spat.

"This is not the time to be reckless." Kryik warned.

"I'm sick of hiding from these bastards!" Shepard shouted.

A warning shot pinged off her shields. She turned sharply to the source peeking out of a prefab window. Kryik pointed to the sky. More Collectors were flying in on the buzzing hum of paper thin wings.

"Please, Shepard!"

She had never heard him say 'please' for anything. 'Thank you', and 'I'm sorry', but never 'please'. It shook her from her battle rage enough to get her moving to cover. She climbed the short stair to the walk that connected the two prefabs, crouching down and slamming her back against the gravity guard.

Nothing stood a chance in their cross fire. Between incendiaries, shredders, and biotic shock waves the court yard became a killing ground.

"They're pulling out!" Garrus shouted into the com.

A ceased fire settled an eerie calm over the blood splattered field. SDA and Vakarian the coming storm. Cautiously, Shepard descended the star to meet Garrus at the platform. Kryik stayed in his window. It had been too easy. Something else was coming. Kryik looked intensely at the Collector ship. His turian sight keenly searching for the threat he knew was pressing in on them.

Garrus shook his head in disbelief. "Get ready…I don't know what they're planning but…"

A deep humming filtered down to them on the sweet smelling breeze. Above them and a dark shadow like a black speck left the Collector ship and closed in on the small square of green.

"Move!" Shepard ordered as she ducked into the cover of a nearby stack of crates.

Garrus fell in beside her. Nihlus would never forgive him, or himself if something happened to Shepard, again. He wouldn't leave her side. They needed better cover. Damn Nihlus for being a good jumper.

The thing that dropped down to the ground where they had been standing was an atrocity. It was huge, and black with a mouth full of husks. It reminded Kryik of the horned beetles he used to torment as a child. A violet wave of dark energy rippled out from its body like tossing a stone in a puddle. The bands hit Vakarian and Shepard as the fled fro better cover. Their shields collapsed grunted as he hit the ground. Shepard cried out in agony as searing pain shot through her body.

"Shepard!" Kryik yelled from his protected perch. His features were a mash of fear and rage.

"I'm okay!" She shouted, "Just take that fucking thing out!"

"I picked up one of the Collector particle guns." Kryik told her over the com. "I think I can use it."

Shepard didn't need to know more than that. The monster rose into the air, tracking Shepard's movements as she and Vakarian split up to divide the thing's attention. Garrus dropped to the ground as two powerful particle beams shot out from the orbital eyes, blasting small craters beyond him. Shepard fired on the thing from behind a stack of crates, bringing it closer to Kryik and away from Vakarian. She took a second to contact the Normandy.

"EDI, any time now would be good!"

"GARDIAN anti-ship batteries at 80%, Shepard." EDI replied.

Kryik did what he did best, take a risk and hope his intuition was still reliable. Reaching over his shoulder for the Collector rifle on his back, he unclipped the strange weapon. The rock like surface casing slid open, humming with power. Kryik took aim at the open mouth full of glowing shells that had once been people and pulled the trigger fashioned for a there fingered hand. Light leapt from the weapon in the all to familiar yellow of destruction long passed. The barrier of the atrocity eroded away in seconds. With it's shields down, Vakarian and Shepard fired on it as well. Slowly, the thing turned from it's pursuit of Shepard to the turian that fired native weaponry upon it. It seemed to scream at him from all the glowing faces in it's mouth. It's eyes glowed, preparing to fire, but it would not get the chance.

Kryik didn't let up on the trigger, keeping a steady pulse on the creation. The barrel grew hot in his palm, even through his armor. Just a few more seconds, that's all he needed. He was sure of it. There was a brilliant flash that seemed contained to the surface of the monster. Then, as if it were trapped in a single moment in time, the thing that reminded him of beetles began to crack with fractures of light and simply fizzled to nothingness.

"GARDIAN anti-ship batteries at 100%. I have control!"

EDI's computerized voice heralded the rumbling boom of the defense towers coming to life and firing on the invading ship. The deep resonating sound had never been so comforting to his ears.

Alliance lasers blasted into the stony exterior of the alien vessel. Kryik dropped down from the window and ran over to join Shepard in a triumphant smirk at the fleeing ship. Vakarian came up behind him at took to the other side of the Commander. Their victory was tainted with the knowledge that not all the colonists had been saved. The ship's engines shook the ground as it took off for space, appearing as a bright falling star in reverse. As the rumble of the Collector engines faded, leaving an empty silence in it's wake, a reminder of their failure came running across the court yard.

"No! Don't let them get away!"

The mechanic from the bunker, Delan, ran toward the departing ship and waving his arms as if he would take off in flight after the Collectors.

"It's too late." Shepard sighed, frustrated and exhausted. "We did everything we could."

She thought of the Illusive Man, and wondered how true her words really were.

"Half the colony's in there!" Delan shouted at her.

His dull green eyes glared at her from beneath the brim of his cap. He didn't hide his rage or anguish from his face. "They took Egan and Sam and...Lilith! Do something!"

"What do you want me _to do_? I didn't _want_ it to end this way!" Shepard protested. "Their ship has superior weapons and armor, and it's huge. How are we supposed to catch it? You're lucky they're leaving! It's not like _you _helped us _fight_!"

"You did good, Shepard." Garrus offered.

Delan turned and looked at her with a raised brow. He took a few steps toward them, intently examining her face.

"Shepard? Wait...I know that name. Sure I remember you…you're some type of big Alliance hero!" Delan said dismissively, and crossed his arms.

"Commander Shepard. Captain of the Normandy. The first human Spectre and member of the first SDA. Saviour of the Citadel."

The voice sounded all to familiar as the face that the words belonged to emerged from the main entry and crossed the field to stand little more than a meter from her.

"You're in the presence of a legend, Delan…and a ghost."

"All the good people we lost and you get left behind? Figures…screw this. I'm done with you Alliance types."

Delan threw his hands up and stalked off. Shepard ignored the colonist, staring in disbelief at the almost_ un_familiar face of Kaiden Alenko. He still looked like himself, but something had changed in him. He seemed stronger, and not physically. There was an air of assurance and confidence that she did not remember being there before. It was good to see he'd grown.

"I thought you were dead, Shepard." Kaiden said. "We all did."

He grasped her offered hand and shook it as he might an old friend or respected officer, friendly and professional. But something in his eyes said much more. Almost as much as the volumes of unarticulateable feeling she saw in Nihlus' eyes every day.

"Kaiden. It's good to see you." Shepard smiled, waiting for the questions she knew would come. "How have you been?"

"That's all you have to say? You show up after two years and just act like nothing happened?"

Kaiden's dark brows knitted on his tanned face. Confusion settled in after the shock left his eyes. The questions bubbled up to the surface like boiling water.

"Where have you been? Why didn't you try to contact me? Why didn't you let me know you were alive?"

Shepard glanced up and Kryik as he stepped up beside her, then back to Alenko. There was no way to answer Alenko's questions that wouldn't end the conversation in a disagreement, and she was too tired to play games. It would be faster to just lay it all out there, Cerberus and all.

"I was died, Kaiden. You were there, you know what happened. I've been in a coma, or worse, for the last two years while Cerberus rebuilt me."

"You're with Cerberus now?"

Kaiden recoiled as if she'd just back handed him, then glanced over Kryik and Vakarian behind her. His face almost became a sneer of disbelief.

"Garrus? Nihlus? You too? I can't believe the reports were right!"

"Reports? You mean you already knew?" Garrus asked, stepping up beside Shepard.

"Why doesn't that surprise me." Shepard mumbled. Beside her Kryik's mandibles twitched. He was probably thinking the same thing she was.

"Alliance Intelligence thought Cerberus might be behind the missing human colonies. They got a tip this colony might be the next one to get hit."

Alenko crossed his arms, eyeing the three of them angrily before he addressed Shepard again.

"Anderson stone walled me, but there were rumors that you weren't dead…that you were working for the enemy."

"I understand your feelings on Cerberus." Shepard huffed, growing impatient with fatigue. "I don't trust them, either. But right now they're the only one's looking into the abductions."

"Do you really believe that…or is that just what Cerberus wants you to think?" Kaiden scowled at her. "I wanted to believe the rumors that you were alive, but I never expected _anything _like _this_! You turned your back on everything we believed in! You betrayed the Alliance! You betrayed..."

"Lieutenant Alenko!" She'd had enough. "I didn't betray a _goddamned_ thing! If anything, the Alliance betrayed _me_, and you and _everyone_ who served on the Normandy!The Collectors are targeting human colonies. They are working with the Reapers! Whether the Council wants to believe it or not, the threat is real. These people didn't even believe that the Collectors were real, and look what happened!" Shepard gestured to the colony around them. "Cerberus is doing the right thing, this time. The issue is bigger than humanity and if Cerberus can see that, why can't you see past Cerberus?"

"I want to believe you Shepard, but I don't trust Cerberus. They could be using the threat of a Reaper to manipulate you! What if they're behind it? What if they're working with the Collectors?" Alenko offered his logic.

"Damn it, Alenko!" Nihlus spoke up, taking a stand next to Sonya. "You're so focused on Cerberus that you're ignoring the truth!"

Nihlus knew too well the doubts in her heart, seeded there by the Illusive Man, the Council... His support, as well as that of Garrus and Anderson, was what helped keep her resolve strong. He would not allow Kaiden to damage that. The galaxy depended on their mission. He would shoot the man himself if he threatened that.

Shepard glanced up at the turian, surprised to hear anger in his voice, shocked that he'd cursed at the Lieutenant. She'd never known him to let his frustration enrage him.

"Okay, Alenko," Shepard said, turning back to her old crewman, "I can see that you're not going to listen to reason…"

"You show up after _two years_ and tell me you're working with _Cerberus_! Where does _reason _figure into _any of this_? You've changed," He accused her, "but I still know where my loyalties lie, I'm an Alliance soldier…always will be."

Kaiden paused, looking at his old team mates, his commander. They had been a family, of sorts. It was like loosing a part of himself all over again.

"I've got to report back to the Citadel." Alenko said softly. "They can decide if they believe your story or not."

"They won't, Kaiden." Shepard spoke with steel in her voice. "They want to blame the geth, or Cerberus...I already tried. What few seem to realize is you don't have to believe something for it to be true."

"A leopard can't change its spots, Cerberus can't be trusted." He retorted bitterly, then turned away. "Goodbye Shepard…and be careful."

Shepard and her boys watched Alenko walk away. She was done. Done with Alenko, with this colony... for the day. She just wanted a shower, a meal and sleep. She tapped her com and hailed the Normandy.

"Joker, send the shuttle to pick us up. I've had enough of this colony."

"Sending the Kodiak to your position now, Commander." Joker replied.

Shepard walked over to a line of crates, marred by gun shots and laser fire, and sat down. Kryik followed, taking a seat next to her. She let his slip his arm around her shoulders. He nuzzled her forehead, then they looked off toward the horizon as the sun arced over head and passed into the first stages of twilight.

Garrus leaned against the wall of the AA gun terminal. It wasn't the first time he'd felt lonely, but he wasn't exactly jealous. He simply longed for his own companion, something he never really thought he wanted until he saw what Nihlus shared with Shepard. He just wanted a good, turian female to fight along side him during the day, and lay along side him at night. Or maybe an asari...


	37. Premeditation

The Illusive man, whom which Shepard had begun to refer to as TIM, provided the Commander of the Normandy with two more dossiers. She had been surprised to see TIM had added Tali to her list of recruits. He must have done some home work after the encounter at Freedom's Progress. She was looking forward to seeing the young quarian again. Weeks that seemed like months had passed since that fateful day. The woman she'd met was so much more grown-up than the girl on pilgrimage she remembered. It would be good to see her again.

The Normandy sliced across the galaxy like a warm knife through fresh butter. Shepard left the galaxy map platform and headed for the elevators. Garrus had assured her the weapons upgrades were coming along just fine, but she still wanted to check in on him. After he told her about the loss of his team, he seemed a little distant. Especially after Horizon. He almost seemed angry about something. He still teased and made his jokes, but he was more... _turian_ that usual. The elevator doors closed and she shook her head.

"That didn't make since." Shepard told herself. "He_ is_ turian. Get a grip. It's probably just in your head."

"Shepard?" EDI's voice echoed in the small space of the elevator.

"Are you spying on me?" Shepard accused, angry that her perceived privacy had been invaded.

"No, Shepard. I simply picked up on your vocal signatures. With no one in the elevator with you, I assumed you were addressing me. I apologize. Note; if one finds themselves in a conversation alone, perhaps one should seek medical attention."

"Thanks, _EDI_. I'm fine." Shepard replied politely through gritted teeth. Damned AI.

The doors slid open and Shepard left the elevator as quickly as she could. She knew she couldn't really get away from EDI, but it made her feel better to pretend she'd left her standing in the car with the doors closing in her face.

Shepard rounded the corner and went strait for the forward batteries. Her mental note to give Chakwas the ice brandy gave her a kick in the head when she passed by the doctor's office.

"_Damn_, I've got to _do_ that." Shepard thought to herself.

* * *

Garrus heard the doors open behind him.. He knew it was the Commander. She had a distinct floral oder with the ever present undertow scent of Nihlus. He spun around excitedly to face his friend. She would help him. He knew that like he knew the smell of her musk during a fight or the sound of her voice over gun fire.

"Shepard, I'm glad you came by. I've got something. I may need your help. Do you remember Sidonis... the one who betrayed my team?"

He waited for her to nod, then continued. He left the dim light of the battery for the brighter lights of the hall. Shepard followed close behind him, listening intently to his words.

"I found a lead on him! There's a specialist on the Citadel, name's 'Fade'. He's an expert on helping people disappear. Sidonis was seen with him." He said in earnest.

"I'll get us to the Citadel as soon as I can." She promised. "How do we find Fade?"

It comforted her to know that he still felt he could confide in her and even ask for her help. She had no problem with making a stop at the Citadel to take down Sidonis. It was the least she could do for her home-boy.

"I've arranged a meeting in a warehouse near the neon markets on Zakara ward." He told her.

He made eye contact with her briefly. He saw the steel in her eyes and knew she was there for him. She was as good a friend as she was a Commander.

"Thanks Shepard." He flashed a grin. "I appreciate you taking the time to help me."

He nodded to her and went back to work. He thoughts focused on Sidonis. The old anger boiled back to the surface. He tried to focus on his work. There were always calibrations to do, tests to run, something... but he couldn't concentrate. All he could think of was the satisfaction of putting a bullet hole in the carapace of Sidonis' metallic face.


	38. Haestrom

Haestrom was hot. Nearly 44 degrees cercus in the shade. But that wasn't the problem. Nothing could withstand direct sunlight for more than a few seconds, including native life, without burning to crispy, black ash. What Tali or anyone else was doing on the abandoned quarian colony world was a curious unknown. Hundreds of years ago the colonies were established to study the local sun. Garrus could only guess that to be the reason for the return to the geth infested planet. It was possible she was collecting old data, or acquiring new data, but _why_ Tali would take the risk for information on a sun that warmed no inhabited worlds was a bit beyond him. While her reasons for being on Haestrom were unclear, he was looking forward to seeing another member of the old crew. Maybe Tali wouldn't turn and walk the way Alenko had. Shepard hadn't seemed too awfully upset by it, only pissed off that Kaiden had been so narrow minded despite their best efforts to enlighten him. Garrus didn't blame her. Alenko wasn't exactly on the list of people he wanted to see again any time soon either.

Kryik, Shepard, Grunt and Vakarian hoped out of the shuttle onto the stone floor of the landing area. It was one of the few times Shepard had chosen to bring 'her boys' based simply on the fact that they were turian and would be more likely to handle the heat better than any of the others, save Grunt. Which was why she'd also included the krogan. It wouldn't hurt to bring along familiar faces and fellow non-humans to persuade her to join the mission either.

There was only one way to go and it was blocked by a gate. A control room was next to the blockade and there were no geth in sight. Getting to the control room looked simple, but the there was a large patch of unavoidable direct sun. His shields sizzling with the heat was clearly audible over the beeping alarm that sounded annoyingly by his ear.

"We'll have to make sure we fight from the shade!"

He meant it as a tease, but the '_I know that_' look his commander gave him told him to shut his mouth. He promptly received a silent scowling reprimand from Kryik that was more about military structure than harassing Shepard. Grunt followed close behind him, breathing heavy as his namesake suggested he might. Not to imaginative a fellow. But, as they soon found out, excellent in battle despite his lack of real experience. All that training pumped into his brain in the tank must have taken well. The geth that found themselves in his sights didn't last long. The krogan loved it, or would have if not for the lack of blood and gore from the synthetic life forms. Garrus liked a good kill as much as the next turian, but Grunt's revelry in destruction was disturbing.

Dodging fire and moving across ground from shadow to shadow was tricky work. Not incredibly difficult, but tricky. Passing through a short tunnel that curved around a main access pass that was blocked, Shepard picked up a live walky from a dead quarian. The squad leader; Kal'Reegar, was on the other end. Shepard patched the signal in to the teams com, then dropped the walky to the stone beneath their feet.

"... we got what we were after." Kal'Reegar's voice came over his com. "They got us pined down, can't get to our ship. Can't transmit data through the solar radiation."

"What brought you this deep into geth controlled space?" Shepard asked.

"You're asking the wrong person, Shepard, I just point and shoot. Something about the sun's going bad faster than it should, some kind of energy problem."

"What's your status? Give us your location. We'll be there as soon as we can." said Shepard.

"There's not many of us left. We're down to half strength. Made the synthetic bastards pay for it though. We're bunkered down at base camp across the valley. We've got Tali Zora in a secure shelter. If you can extract her we'll keep 'em off ya."

"Hold position. We'll hit their back ranks." Shepard responded.

Below them a small team of quarian marines held off geth from entering the bunker that lead around to Kal'Reegar's location. Garrus started to follow Shepard and Kryik over the side of the ledge to the lower level to assist when Reegar came over their com.

"Wait! Watch your ass! We got a drop ship coming in!"

There wasn't time to react. The drop ship flew low over their heads and, with two shots from it's aft canons, the quarian resistance was decimated. The blasts threatened the balance of a large stone slab that teetered precariously on the edge on another. Shepard motioned to hurry. The human was crazy! She wanted to run and try and make it to the doors before the beam fell! Damn, she had quads. It's what made her Shepard, and the only commander he'd take orders from. The crunch of quarian bones was drowned out by the ground shaking boom when the stone pillar gave to the pull of gravity, slamming with finality on the bodies of the dead. Shepard paused in her tracks. Whether it was because of the tomb the quarian marines were now crushed to lie in, or being cut off from their destination was unclear. If he knew his friend like the thought he did, it was a little of both, but more of the latter. 'Soldiers die', she'd say, then move on. The mission could not suffer.

"Damn it!" Shepard swore. "Door way's blocked. That last charge hit a pillar."

"There's demo charges in the buildings near by. You'll need two to blast through." Reegar told her. Sometimes marines die.

* * *

The charges exploded, sending chunks of the slab flying in every direction. Garrus covered his head from the raining debris.

"Let's move!" Shepard ordered.

"Right behind you, Shepard."

It was more just to have something to say. He hated letting the tension build. It was more fun to shout sarcastic comments at his fallen enemies, but whenever he did Kryik gave him a look that reminded him of turian military superiors.

The doors opened and Shepard shot a still living geth point blank that was crawling across the floor. He almost felt sorry for it. Almost. He kicked it out of the way as he passed, denying Grunt the satisfaction of stomping over it. The smell in the enclosed space was old. The air was too dry for mold or fungus, but he could still taste the centuries on the back of his tongue. The interior design was a little lack luster from what he expected.

"Quarian architecture. There's two words you don't expect to hear together." He mused aloud, ignoring Kryik's glance.

"Why do we care? Anyone choosing to come here _should_ be on their own." Grunt remarked.

This time it was Garrus who gave the disapproving glare. Shepard accessed a few logs from an old computers while Kryik took apart a weapon to strip it of it's superior parts. Grunt just huffed while he waited for more action. Garrus gathered ammo and unspent heat sinks from the fallen. Kneeling by a quarian male, he considered taking off the mask to see what they looked like under there. He knew it wasn't right, that it could be viewed as desecrateing the body, but his curiosity was hissing like a loose steam valve in his head. His finger pad was on the release button. He hadn't started applying pressure, but he was strongly considering it, when static came over the radio of the hollo imaging communicator near the locked exit. It was Tali.

"Tali Zora to base camp, come in base camp. Hello? I anyone there?"

Garrus stood up, forgetting about the mask as Shepard ran to answer the call.

"Tali, it's Shepard."

"Shepard? What are you doing here?" Tali responded, happy, but in shock.

"I came for you, actually, but we can talk about that when we're not being shot at by geth. How do I get you and your team outta here?"

"Reegar and his team are holding off the geth outside. I can hear them firing. Just go through the door and you should find him on the other side."

"The door's locked." Kryik said over Shepard's shoulder.

"Kryik is with you too? How many are you?" Tali was visibly taken back.

"We're five, including me. I've got a krogan and Vakarian along." Shepard answered.

"Garrus? Wow! Shepard, you have been busy." Tali's hollo image hit a few keys off screen. "There, that should do it. See you soon. Be careful... and please, do what you can to keep Reegar alive."

The hollow vanished and the doors opened as Garrus approached them. Tali's last words stuck in Garrus' mind like a thorn. He always been curious about Tali. Her personality was cute and she could handle herself. Quarians and turians were both built with dextro-proteins. He wouldn't have to worry about killing her. He pushed the thoughts aside for the moment as Shepard took the lead. The team filed down the short, but narrow hall to an observation post. All the windows were blocked. Garrus went strait for the controls. The sun would be blocked by the wall, so there was no danger there. At the very least it might give them a preview of the battle ahead. He was more right than he wanted to be. The lock down shields went up, catching the attention of the geth below and a very large, four-legged ion canon.

"Colossus! Hit the deck!" Shepard shouted.

The impact of the ion canon's blast shook rubbled down on them from the ceiling. Garrus wasn't surprised to hear Grunt laughing.

"That's why I follow you, Shepard. Big things!"

Grunt heard her, but it only made him smile. Garrus couldn't help but shake his head at the whole thing. He tried to tell her opening the tank might not be worth the headache. Now, it seemed he had more to worry about from comic relief than a berserk pure krogan. He laughed when he caught sight of Kryik's annoyance.


	39. Colossus

A lone quarian in a bright red suit shot a rocket from his shoulder as Shepard and her boys, plus one, took cover behind the partial stone wall next to the marine. When he ducked back down he told her what they had already guessed. Garrus strained to hear the conversation while enemy fire rocked the ground as it slammed into their cover.

"Welcome to Leader Kal'Reegar, Migrant Fleet Marines. We talked on the radio..."

"I know who you are." Shepard cut him off. She wasn't trying to be rude, but they didn't have time for introductions. "Are you all that's left?"

"Tali's still safe inside over there. The geth are trying to get to her." Reegar nodded toward the doors on the far side of a stone court yard. "Geth killed the rest of my squad. It's been brutal. They've got that damned colossus, so the best I've been able to do is distract their attention."

"How many geth are out there?" Shepard asked.

"They're near platoon strength and the colossus has self repair capabilities, so you can't whittle it down. Tried to move in closer to get a clear shot with the launcher, but one of the get tore trough my suit. Whatever we do, we have to take it down fast."

"How bad is your suit damage?"

"The effected area has been isolated and I swimming in antibiotics. Geth might get me, but I'm not gonna die from an infection in the middle of battle! That's just damn insulting!"

"Glad to hear it. Got any ideas?"

"Just one!" Reegar patted the launcher in his grip. "I'm not moving so well, but I can still pull the trigger! The sun hasn't fried this rocket launcher yet. You move in close, I'll give keep the colossus busy. Maybe even drop it's shields. With luck, we'll be able to finish it off."

"Sounds good. Be careful. I promised Tali I'd keep you alive!"

Shepard's reiteration of Tali's words irritated the thorn that was already in his thoughts. Garrus wondered just how close Tali and Reegar were. Shaking his head, Garrus gave himself a mental boot to the head. What the hell was he thinking? It's not like he and Tali ever did more than chat about tech. His mild flirting had gone un-noticed or ignored. Maybe he should have been more clear or made fewer jokes. He told himself, if he survived the mission, he would go back to the Citadel and find Novea. Maybe that one night of stress relief still floated around in her memory with positive impressions.

"Don't worry about me. My job is to keep Tali safe. Hit 'em for me! Keelha'sali!"

* * *

Shepard's team moved away, splitting into two smaller groups. Shepard and Grunt took the left route, providing them with the most cover from the colossus and giving Grunt a lane of geth to bowl over. Kryik and Vakarian took the higher ground. If they could take out the geth up there, they could provide sniper cover. Reegar kept his back to the cool stone wall. The blast from the colossus could be felt through the barrier. He would wait for the sound of the ion canon to draw off, then take his shot. It was hard not to wonder at what Shepard had told him. Was Tali's concern professional? Brotherly as a quarian? Or had their time together on the mission and quiet moments on board the ship sparked the interest in her that it had in him.

Other species couldn't see through the mask. They were always curious about the physical appearance of a quarian. At least volis could take their suits off on their home world. Quarian's couldn't go sans suit anywhere but a Clean Room. Tali was beautiful behind her purple face shield, at least he thought so. He wouldn't mind sharing a Clean Room with her. The thought gave him another reason to live through the battle.

* * *

They were in position. It was slow work taking out the geth on the upper walkway, but there was plenty of cover for the patient. The sun stung his shields a few times, but it wasn't anything he couldn't handle. Shepard's voice came over the com.

"We're in position. Are you ready?"

"We've cleared our post and we're taking out the threat two at a time." Kryik answered. He took aim and shot the head of a geth as he spoke. A shot from Garrus' rifle took out the one next to it.

"Okay, Reegar. Give it all ya got!" Shepard ordered over the com.

"Yes ma'm!"

A rocket from Kal'Reegar's position was marked by the thin trail of smoke left in it's wake. The impact didn't phase the colossus, but Shepard's omni-tool noted the decrease in shield strength. She picked off the geth that came at her from behind a column support block. Grunt side stepped across the open hall to a position opposite her, his claymore in hand. Shepard had splurged on the specialized upgraded weapon for him as a show of good faith. It seemed to make him happy. He laughed whenever his target's head exploded. Another rocket hissed across the court yard. The colossus took a step back, but it's shields remained in tact.

"Damn it!" Shepard swore.

"Garrus, hit that think with an over load."

Garrus changed position and activated his omni-tool, following the order without responding. It was how they worked. He didn't need to tell her he was doing his job. She would know when the orange energy burst hit the shields. The fluxuation would show up on her readout. His pulse was followed by a succession of blue warp bursts. Next to him, Kryik put collapsed his sniper and recliped it in place, then uncliped the Collector rifle from his back. It had become a permanent fixture of his armor since he'd picked it up on Horizon.

"Cover me." He told Vakarian.

Garrus nodded, keeping his focus on the geth at the other end of his scope. Kryik moved further down the walk, putting himself in direct line of sight to the colossus. The geth below immediately split their attention to focus fire on the new threat. Vakarian fired into the heads of the geth firing on Kryik. More warp blasts crashed into the colossus followed by gun fire. It's shields were down and it was taking damage. They had to keep on the pressure to inhibit it from being able to curl up and repair itself. Then the singing whine on the collector particle been sliced through the battle field on the yellow light of destruction, piercing the armor of the colossus. In seconds it's stance faltered, crushing a trooper beneath one of it's legs. Reegar's last rocket sailed across the gap, crashing into the side of the mechanical beast. The combined fire power threw the geth construct to it's knees in a crumpled heap. The remaining geth didn't last long after.

Vakarian and Kryik hopped down from the shorter wall to the ground. Geth littered the ground in parts and pools of fluid. Kryik clipped the collector rifle back in place. Garrus noticed a blue streak of blood on his neck. One of the geth must have managed to graze him.

"You should put some medi-gel on that." Garrus nodded to the wound.

Kryik absently ran an armored talon over the spot. When he looked at the blood stain on his fingers, he seemed more annoyed than anything else. He took a mini-medi-pack from a compartment on his armor and applied the gel with one quick, careless swipe at his neck. Down the hall, Shepard and Grunt came jogging up to greet them. Grunt had a few minor scratches on his face and arms. He seemed exceptionally proud of them. Shepard had also received minor lacerations on her face where the debris from exploding geth made it past her eye shield. Despite his lack of caring about his own wounds, Garrus was slightly amused when Kryik promptly pushed a mini-medi-pack into her hands with a stern look of insistence. Shepard had grinned then and smeared the gel over her cheeks, wincing a little at the sting.

"Good work. Now let's get Tali."

The doors to a small room. A few destroyed geth lay on the floor. One was propped against an electrical panel and a spark of energy popped at the neck, making the head bob in comic rhythm. Tali vas Neema stood at the far end over a console station.

"Just let me finish this down load." Said the quarian, with out turning to greet her rescuers.

A few clicking buttons latter Tali turned to see a few familiar faces, and one new one. Garrus was sure he saw a smile behind the mask.

"Shepard. I can't believe you're here! This whole mission has been a disaster. I wish I'd joined you back on Freedom's Progress, but I couldn't let anyone take my place on something this risky."

"A lot of quarians lot their lives here. Was it worth it?" Shepard asked, a bit of bitterness followed her words.

"I don't know, Shepard." Tali lowered her head. "It wasn't my call. The Admiralty Board believes the information here was worth sacrificing all our lives for. I have to believe they know what's best."

"Shepard didn't ask what some admiral thought." Garrus stepped up, pissed off that so many lives were willingly thrown away because of some political value placed on life. "She asked what_ you _thought."

"A lot of people died here. Some of them were my friends. All of them were good at their jobs. That damn data better be worth it. The price was too high."

Garrus shook his head, taking a step back to brood over his own vendetta in need of repayment.

"Whatever the reason, I'm glad we could help." Shepard said, glancing back at Garrus over her shoulder. "Once you deliver that data, I could really use your help on the Normandy."

"I promised to see this mission through. I did. I can leave with you and send the data to the fleet. If the admirals have a problem with it they can go to hell. I just watched the rest of my team die."

* * *

Reegar left cover, laying the empty rocket launcher to rest on the stone floor, when the fighting stopped. It took him a while, but he managed to hobbled through the geth littered battle field, sticking to the shadows as much as he could, until he pulled himself up the ramp through the open doors. He could hear Tali's voice echoing inside. The pain from his wound was only worsening, but he wouldn't stop until he saw that Tali was safe with his own eyes.

... watched the rest of my team die."

"Maybe not the_ whole_ rest of your team, ma'm." He said, dragging his feet across the uneven floor.

"Reegar! You made it..." Tali breathed relief with the last of her words.

"Your old captain's as good as you said." Reegar indirectly complimented Shepard. "Damn colossus never stood a chance.

"If need be, the Normandy can getch'ya outta here, Reegar." Shepard offered.

"Well, the the geth didn't damage our ship. As long as we get outta here before reinforcements show up, we'll be fine." Reegar responded. His pride doing most of the talking.

"Actually I won't be going with you." Tali told him, almost apologetically. "I'm joining Commander Shepard."

"I'll pass the data to the Admiralty Board and let 'em know what happened." Reegar responded without hesitation. He was a marine first. Her friend second. Anything beyond that was speculation. "She's all yours now, Shepard. Keep her safe."

Reegar turned back to Tali. He felt juvenile for hoping there was more between them. More than anything he wanted her to return from whatever mission her old captain was taking her on so they could explore the possibility. Outside he heard the whining engines of the small shuttle that had come to collect any survivors. When he started to limp to the exit, Tali grabbed his arm and looped it over her shoulder. He could see her grin at him through the mask, and he let her help him to the shuttle. Her new crew mates waited patently a few metes back while Tali and the pilot helped him into the transport.

"Be careful." He told her.

"I will. Make sure you get that data to the Board." Tali said.

"Yes, ma'm." Reegar nodded. "Keelha'seli."

"Keelha'seli."

Their eyes met through the face shields as Tali backed away and the hatch closed. As the shuttled lifted away he couldn't help but feel as though he might not see her again.


	40. Talking

Tali took up residence on the engineering deck. Shepard had expected nothing less. Garrus encouraged himself into going down to see her a few times, but always turned around and returned to the forward batteries before passing the second set of doors. On one such occasion, Jack was waiting for him at the top of the stairwell, arms crossed and leaning with her back against the wall. Garrus' step hesitated when the unexpected welcoming committee greeted him.

"Don't let me stop you." Jack goaded. "Just get the fuck in there already."

"I don't know what you're referring to." Garrus replied flatly. "I'm just..."

"What? You're just fuckin' what?" Jack pressed him. "Look, _Garrus_, I'm tired of your pussy ass shit. And before you ask; yes, it is my damn business. Every fuckin' time you drag your ass down here, I gotta listen to your damn feet walk over my fuckin' head while you pace the damn walkway. Quiet bein' such a bitch and either do it or don't. I don't give a shit either way. Just stop fuckin' around. Hell, I'll fuck ya if it'll get ya to stop comin' down here."

Garrus wasn't exactly sure _what _to do. He _felt_ like putting a bullet through her smug, round head. Or cutting out her hateful tongue. Maybe skinner her and hanging her highly decorated skin as a tapestry on the wall of the batteries. But she had a point. He had been rather indecisive and cowardly. Not like a turian at all. Walking toward the doors that would open to main engineering, he paused to glare at Jack.

"If you ever talk to me like that again,"

"You'll what?" Jack seethed, allowing her biotics to flare.

"You're biotics won't save you, _Jack_." He spat back, then left her to brood in the hall.

* * *

"Garrus?" Tali asked.

She seemed confused when she turned to see the turian and not Shepard coming to see her. Garrus couldn't help but notice the way her suit hugged the curve of her body, almost as if it was painted on. It was the first time he'd ever found breasts attractive.

"Hey, I wanted to come down and see what you thought of the new Normandy." Garrus began.

He thought it was a good start. At least he hadn't 'stuck his foot in his mouth', as the human saying went. He'd picked up quite a few of those from Shepard.

"She's amazing. I've never seen a drive core like this!"

For a while they carried on a friendly conversation about tech, discussing main frames, power capacity and energy out put. Then he did exactly what he was hoping to avoid. He stuck his proverbial foot in his notorious mouth.

"Remember our elevator conversations on the Citadel?" He chuckled. His smile quickly died when the glowing eyes behind the mask narrowed at him. That was the moment he knew he'd blown it. Damn.

"Yes. I do. Don't you have some _calibrations_ to do?" Tali turned her back to him. "I need to get to work, and so do you."

"Yeah, I guess you're right." Garrus replied sullenly.

Upon leaving the engine room, he noticed Jack was still in the hall. He was in no mood for more of her crap.

"Didn't turn out like you planed, hu?" Jack asked with a sneer. "Life's like that, ya know."

"Look, Jack. We don't have to be friends, but we do have to work together. Lay off the bull shit. Let down your guard sometime and you may find people aren't as bad as you think they are."

"What do _you_ know about how_ bad _people can be?" Jack growled at him, leaning in with a pointed finger. "_You _don't know _shit_! So_ fuck_ you!"

"About that," Garrus took the opportunity to provoke her, ignoring his own rage that continuously vexed his mind with thoughts of Sedonis. "Didn't you say you'd take care of that if it didn't work out back there?"

Garrus nodded to the doors behind him. Jack's face changed to one that was knowing and somehow darker than the one that was ready to rip him in half. Her eyes flicked to the his crotch, then back to his face, heavily lidded. Her full, red lips came within centimeters of his mouth. He could feel her breath on his face, smell her faint scent of angst and venom laced with pheromones she seemed to release at will. If his higher processes weren't avidly trying to find ways to piss her off, he might have given in to her sultry taunt.

"I knew you wanted me." She breathed, her voice deep in her throat. "Everyone wants something. You wanna fuck me?"

"I might. Or I might want to..."

Garrus turned away from her toward the doors leading to the hall. He could feel her eyes burning into the back of his head as the doors hissed shut behind him. In the elevator he collapsed against the wall of the car, taking in a deep breath and exhaling it slowly. Jack emitted so much tension, projecting it onto those around her. It's no wonder her past was criminal. He didn't know how Shepard could have whole conversations with her. The lonely quiet of the forward batteries was a welcome silence of solitude after the drama on the engineering deck.


	41. Arriving on Illium

Evening on Illium was said to be breath taking. As Shepard stood behind the helm while Joker lined up the Normandy with the airlock docking ramp, she wasn't sure she agreed with that statement. Dusk was generally pretty anywhere, unless it was the last thing you saw before you died. That tends to sour the experience. Maybe that was what tainted her view of the setting sun now. Trying to be objective, Shepard still found that the haze of pollution on the horizon and the numerous buildings blocking the sky took away from any beauty the sight may have held. Behind her, the familiar thump of the ramp magnetically locking around the air lock and the hiss of air pressure equalization, let Shepard know it was time to disembark.

"We're lined up and locked on, Commander." Joker informed her.

"Thanks, Joker." Shepard slapped the head rest and started to walk away. "Go easy on Kelly while I'm gone. She doesn't know you like I do."

She was teasing, of corse, and Joker didn't hold back.

"Don't worry, Commander. I save the good stuff for you!"

"Thanks! I might get jealous if you didn't."

It was always playful banter. Days of curiosity of anyone but Nihlus were a distant memory. She had eyes only for one turian Spectre, and he happened to be heading strait for her from the elevator with a poorly concealed look of concern on his face. Though, to anyone else he would have looked just as stern as always. As his life mate, Sonya knew better.

"What is it?" She asked as he approached.

"Ms. T'Soni has paid for our docking fees, hasn't she." He said.

"Yes, the ground control informed us of that on approach." Shepard looked up at him quizzically.

"What does she want in return?" Nihlus asked.

"Ground Control didn't inform me of any exchange." Shepard told him. "What's going on?"

"I had reason to believe that you were alive because of rumors." He began.

"Yes. And hear say says she's working for the Shadow Broker, and you're worried about that. Right?" She cocked a brow at him, guessing his worry.

"I know how foolish this sounds, especially coming from me." Nihlus held her eyes intently. "But the rumors regarding you were true. Might not the rumors of her? Even The Il... Tim's information tells him she is not to be trusted for that reason."

"Nihlus, I appreciate your concern. Liara was my friend, and yours. I don't think she would betray us." Sonya tried to reassure him, grinning at his attempt to use her new abbreviation for the Illusive Man.

"People change." Nihlus replied flatly.

He was thinking more of himself, how he had changed in the time she was gone. True, he was closer to the way he had been because of her return to him, but he felt he would never be completely free of the contamination of his spirit. Saren's bitterness had finally found it's way in, even after his death. Sonya purged most of that defilement by simply loving him, yet some part of him was permanently changed. Sonya had an edge as well. To be honest, they both had always had a part of themselves that was a bit of a renegade. That trait was part of what brought them together. But they weren't ruthless, like Saren had been. There was a limit. There was a right and wrong. If T'Soni was indeed working for the Shadow Broker, the cost of dealing with her may be a higher price than they would be willing to pay.

Shepard sighed and pursed her lips. She lightly brushed passed him, casually pulling at one of his talons to signal him to follow her. He did, thinking she was concerned with the tension of the crewmen, which was high enough. Nihlus followed her into the elevator, which they rode in silence, to the crew deck. From there she took him to the starboard observatory. The large view port there held an expansive view of the tall buildings of Nos Astra with slits of orange and golden light beaming brightly between them. The light caught in Sonya's hair, igniting it as if it were white hot fire balled into that bun she insisted on wearing when on duty. When she turned her dark, ebony eyes to him she wasn't Commander Shepard, or Spectre for the Citadel; member of the SDA. She was simply herself.

"Nihlus." Her eyes searched his then turned back to the window. "I'm... nervous about this mission. We're not getting any closer to the Collectors and the Reapers are bringing the destruction of the galaxy a little nearer every hour. I need people I trust by my side, and I'm grateful for having members of the old team with me."

Nihlus stood silently by as he listened to his mate share her internal burdens with him. As hard as it was to know she suffered, it was a comfort to him that she trusted in him so completely. He trusted her as much. He wondered if she knew.

"But Cerberus, the dossiers; like Jack... I just don't know. Mordin seems genuine, but we can't know for sure until the end, can we?" She asked, not expecting an answer.

"Do we really know anything for certain until the end?" Nihluls replied.

The sentiment was something his father had once told him. He hadn't thought about his father since Sonya's death. Though he had dreams that he spoke with him in the After, that he had died for a time under the crushing blow of Sovereign's arm. He had dreams that his father was caring for Sonya in her own home outside the Great City. Those dreams had stopped a few months before he began hearing rumors of her return. It was just coincidence. He still dreamt of his father on occasion, like recalling a memory. They were only dreams. The memories of the first few weeks without her threatened tears as a lump in his throat. He slipped his arm around her waist as he stood beside her, pulling her close to lean against him.

"No. I suppose we don't." Sonya sighed, letting him support some of her weight. "Know one thing."

Her voice was soft in the stillness of the room. He could feel the heat of her through the fabric of his tunic. He took his eyes from the columns of early evening to gaze down at her. The dark warmth set in cool silk looked back up at him

"What is that?" He asked the question prompted from him as he turned their bodies toward the other and wrapped his free arm around her back, cradling her.

"I know I love you. I would do anything for you."

The last of her words took him aback, and his mandibles fluttered. It wasn't that he didn't think she would. More of the fact that he'd never considered the thought. He loved her as much, maybe more. There wasn't a deed she could ask of him that he wouldn't execute with precision. He had never thought of_ her _doing _anything_ for _him_. She had already given him his greatest personal desire. Love and acceptance, even forgiveness for unforgivable dishonor. And she came back from death to be with him.

"Sonya, my love, know this; I quit fighting for the lives of the galaxy the moment I began fighting for you. Your's is the life I care for most. I would face the Reapers alone, even if it were only to save you."

"Your fierce spirt would decimate them."

Her delicate hand slid up his chest and to the side of his neck as she spoke. The scent of her skin was a sweet musk in his nostrils. On the heels of her sentence, he pressed his mouth to her's, tasting her words on her lips before the sound of them had left her breath. Everything about her in that moment was perfect. Her confidence in him the greatest aphrodisiac he would ever kiss was interrupted by the synthetic voice of EDI over the intercom.

"Commander Shepard, the shore party is ready to disembark."

Nihlus pressed his forehead to hers, a little amused at the disturbance. Sonya visibly struggled to gain control of her panting breath before she answered.

"Thank you, EDI. I'll be right there."

She gave the AI a few seconds to 'leave', then gave him a quick, but gentle kiss.

"Guess we should get going." She grinned.

Nihlus' mandibles flashed a grin back, nuzzling her one last time before they rushed up to their quarters and threw on their armor. The knowing looks they received when they finally arrived at the air lock were misguided and thusly comical to Shepard and Kryik, but no less embarrassing. The foolish grins and chuckles were squashed by that awkwardness. Kryik did his best to put on the Spectre's mask and robe with authority as Shepard did the same for her Commander persona. She was rather successful in his opinion, as she lead the team down the docking ramp.


	42. Nos Astra

Kryik's hand hovered over the grip of his pistol as the asari sent to greet them approached with two LOKI mechs flanking her arrival. Illium was renowned for it's lack of concern for what it's citizens did as long as it was within the confides of the law. But laws here were as negotiable as the contracts that ran the economy. Nothing was set in stone until it was signed, and even then it could be rewritten if a more acceptable or profitable agreement of terms was reached. As far as he knew they had broken no laws or infringed on any contracts by arriving in Nos Astra. However, this was Illium and it was on the boarder of unstable space. Trouble was never far away. He expected it at ever corner. Preparedness prevents peril. Better safe than sorry. Hope for the best, expect the worst. Any number of human and turian sayings alike scrolled through his mind as he kept his senses tensed for battle and his body relaxed for the benefit of doubt.

Shepard had brought her boys with her, as usual, but Miranda had been included for a side mission. The details were to be left unknown until the time of execution. Whatever was going on, Shepard had given even Nihlus only vague insight. He knew that Miranda was somehow involved on a personal level. There were some connections to Cerberus, but it had nothing to do with any of the group's activities or experiments. That was about the extent of it. He let the concern drop from his mind, keeping his focus on the body language of the asari for any tell to indicate aggression. 'Be ever vigilant.' He reminded himself of his fathers advice as the asari began her greeting.

"Welcome to Nos Astra." the asari addressed the four arrivals. "My name is Careena. If you need information about the area, it would be my pleasure to assist you. I also have a message from your benefactor. Liara T'Soni would like to speak with you at your earliest convenience. Her office is near the trading floor."

"Thank you, I'll head there as soon as I can." Shepard answered.

"Again, welcome to our city. Please, enjoy your stay."

Careena nodded with her pleasant, professional smile and walked away with the mechs in tow. Nihlus could see the hidden excitement behind Shepard's eyes. She was looking forward to seeing her old friend, no doubt hoping to convince her to join their cause. He was unsure if this would be a good idea, if Liara even agreed to do so. Shepard waisted no time in marching directly to Liara's office. He exchanged quick glances with Garrus. He knew as well as the vigilante that Nos Astra was no better than Omega, only shinier. A person could drop off the map just as easily. For all their laws and contracts, it could be the very thing that condemned instead of saved a victim from an unfair arrangement or wrongful situation. His worries were interrupted by EDI, yet again, as the AI provided information over the team's com.

"Customs records indicate a justicar named Samara visiting this port, Shepard. Your former team mate, Liara T'Soni, may have more information. You may wish to speak with her regarding the where abouts of Thane Krios, the assassin on your dossier, as well. Also, I have a message for Ms. Lawson. Lanteia has reserved a room at Eternity and will be waiting."

"Thank you, EDI." Miranda replied just as courteously as she would to a living person.

The trading floor was an open air market. Nihlus wondered what they did when it rained. The low hum of the flying transports zooming between the buildings was barely audible above the din of the trading floor. Snips of conversation caught his ear as he tried to glean information from those he passed. None of it seemed terribly vital or important for their current task, or any undertaking they may accept in the future. But it was best to prepare for everything. At that moment Shepard was stopped by an asari with a message from her 'friend' from 'Novera'. The rachni queen. Something he had not prepared for. The message was simple, if not cryptic. The were hiding, rebuilding, growing. The queen believed that the Reapers forced her ancestors to war. Rachni were apparently not a naturally aggressive people. It would take time for the galaxy to accept that truth, but the queen promised to help fight the Reapers when they came. Perhaps that would be enough to convene the galaxy that they were not the evil that was vanquished by the krogan so long ago. Though, the galaxy would have to be saved first. After the asari messenger left, Shepard continued on the path to Liara. He followed Shepard, with the rest of the team, across the floor and up the stairs near the center of the market. On the landing there was an asari secretary waiting to greet them.

"Hello, I am Nexaris, Ms. T'Soni's assistant. How may I help you today?" the asari greeted them with professional warmth and a smile.  
"I'm Commander Shepard. I need to speak with Liara, please."

Nexaris made a few quick keystrokes on the console near her fingertips, then glanced up once she'd found the memo she was looking for.

"Yes, Ms. T'Soni has been expecting you. She's with a client at the moment, but she as instructed me to allow you access upon your arrival. Please, go right in."

A few more key strokes and the doors opened. Inside Liara was having a rather familiar sounding conversation with an unhappy, balding client on the holo imager.

"Have you ever faced an asari commando unit before? Few humans have. I'll make it simple. Either you pay me, or I flay you alive, with my mind."

The words chilled him as they must have his mate. The colorless cheeks and fading smile told him that she too was remembering the day they met Benezia. He had a feeling this was not going to go as well as Sonya hoped.


	43. Liara

Liara's office, though sparsely decorated, was spacious and clean. The wall behind her desk was one large, curved window over looking the trading floor and the city beyond. The polarized glass kept the glare of the sun out, while taking advantage of the light and the view. Her desk was also designed with clean and modern lines, large enough to be a dinner table. A single console rested on the smooth surface center to the cushioned chair. Even her robes were up scale from the average attire. Her old team mates were thoroughly impressed.

"Shepard! I'm so glad you came!" Liara exclaimed. "Vakarian, Kryik, you too!" She ignored Miranda standing by the door.

"I'm glad to see you're doing well, Ms. T'Soni." Kryik nodded.

"Not too bad a place you got here." Garrus commented.

Though her voice was just as soft, it had gained a harsher edge than the archaeologist they knew. Judging by the conversation they had just walked in on, so had the doctor herself. Nihlus and Garrus stayed back a few steps as Shepard went to greet Liara in an embrace of friends. Miranda remained by the exit.

"My sources said you were alive, but I never believed... it's very good to see you." Liara said as she stepped back from the embrace.

She invited Shepard to sit in the single chair for clients in front of her desk, that was just as plush as her own, with a subtle gesture. Shepard gladly took the opportunity to rest while they talked. Liara took her own seat.

"It's good to see you too, Liara. Thank you for covering the fees. I'll repay you as soon as I can." Shepard told her.

"That won't be necessary. It's the least I can do for everything you've done for me." Liara grinned. "I've been working as an information broker. It's paid the bills since you... " Liara's words trailed off and she averted her eyes for a second, reformulating her sentence. "Well, for the last two years. And now you're back. Gunning for the Collectors with Cerberus." Liara's eyes flicked to the operative that lingered behind the others.

"If you know that, then you know I could use your help." Shepard told her, getting right to the point.

"I can't, Shepard. I'm sorry. I have commitments here. Things I need to take care of."

"What kind of things do you need to take care of? Are you in trouble?" Shepard asked, hoping she could resolve the situation that was keeping Liara here and take her with them like she had done with Mordin.

"No. No trouble. It's been a long two years, Shepard. I had things to do while you were gone. I have debts to repay."

"You know the Reaper threat! What could be more important that saving all life in the galaxy?" Garrus took a few steps forward, angry that Liara put a higher value on a debt than the lives of trillions. "There won't be a debt to owe if the Collectors accomplish whatever task they're doing for the Reapers!"

"Please, you don't understand." Liara began to defend herself.

Shepard raised a hand to quiet Garrus. She didn't need a confrontation on her hands at the moment. Kryik stepped up beside Shepard, like she had done to him so many times. He was annoyed with Liara's response to their request, but his train of thought ran along the same track as Shepard's.

"Is there anything we can do to help?" He asked in his Spectre way.

"No. Thank you for asking, but I cannot allow you to get involved. As Garrus pointed out, you have plenty on your shoulders as it is. I will not ask you to do more. I will help you from here if I can. Is there anything you need to know?"

"I'm looking for Thane Krios. He's supposed to be here on Illium." Shepard responded.

"The assassin. Yes." Liara replied without hesitation. "He arrived here a few days ago." She taped a few keys on her console. "My sources tell me he may be targeting a corporate executive, Nassana Dantius. He contacted a woman named Seryna. Seryna has an office on the cargo transfer levels. Perhaps she can tell you where Krios is."

"That was all just off the top of your head?" Shepard asked, further impressed.

"I'm a very good information broker, Shepard. The world of intrigue isn't that different from a dig site, except that the dead bodies still smell."

"Uhm... That's.. interesting. Maybe you can tell me where I can find the justicar called Samara?" Shepard said, moving on.

"Samara, yes. She arrived recently and registered with Tracking Officer Dara. You can find Dara at the transportation hub."

"Why would Samara have to register with a tracking officer? Is she a criminal?" Shepard asked.

Nihlus's eyes narrowed as he stood beside Shepard. That's all they needed. Another felon on the team. Cerberus seemed to have a way of digging up the most seedy help they could find.

"No. A justicar is one of an ancient sect of asari warriors. Dara will have to give you the details."

"Thanks for the help. That's all I needed to know." Shepard said as she stood to leave.

"Of course. If there's anything else I can help you with, let me know." Liara told her, sincere in her offer.

"I will. I'll talk to you latter, Liara."

Shepard left the room with Miranda and Garrus following. Garrus offered Liara a nod before he disappeared through the door way. Nihlus lingered behind for a few seconds, regarding Liara with cold eyes.

"Is there something else you needed?" Liara asked warily, her guard always up from living amongst the posh society of organized corporate crime and smiling deception.

"You won't let us help you, or even tell us what holds you here in the face of galactic annihilation. The information you provided is helpful, but your combat skills would benefit the mission as well. If you won't or can't tell Shepard, would you confide in me? You know I can get things done."

"Shepard is just as capable." Liara answered without answering.

"I am not doubting her." Nihlus said. "I'm only offering you my assistance."

"Thank you. You are a good friend, but really, I'm fine. I must do this on my own."

"Very well." Nihlus nodded and followed after the rest of the team. He noticed Nexaris' gaze on him as he descended the stairs. There was more to the story than Liara was alluding to. He had a feeling the 'debt' was not a small one and he doubted it had much to do with large sums of money.

He caught up with Shepard on the trading floor as she bought a few upgrades for their weapons and armor. He wondered who she would pursue first. He had a feeling it would be the assassin, if for no other reason than to prevent the murder. But he remembered Nassana Dantius. She had manipulated him into killing her sister for her own personal gain, or rather the prevention of losing favor. No doubt she had committed far worse crimes since. He wondered if the name had summoned the memory in Shepard or Vakarian.

"Which one do you want to hit first?" Garrus asked.

"I think we should go after the assassin first." Shepard said.

Nihlus grinned to himself. He knew her so well, if was funny, but also gratifying. It felt good to be close to someone he knew he could trust. She wasn't always so predictable, and that was exciting. She could still surprise him from time to time, but this was not one of those times. He preferred some predictability on a mission.

"Are you going to let him kill Nassana?" Garrus asked.

"I know what you're thinking. She deserves it. But that's not why we're here." Shepard replied, remembering the ambitious asari who wanted all ties with her sister severed, literally. "We're going in, getting the assassin and getting out."

"Do you plan on trying to stop him?" Miranda asked, breaking the silence she'd held.

"Whatever happens to his target is not my concern." Shepard replied. "Let's try to focus on the mission."

Kryik followed her with a certain amount of pride as she made her way down the hall to the cargo transfer levels. He could almost smell the battle to come and his blood rushed in his veins, excited for the break in the monotony that permeated the air of this business shrouded city.


	44. Seryna and Dara

The cargo transfer level where they found Seryna was not what he expected. There were only two desks in the tiny corner reserved for processing. Shepard approached the asari that was facing outward toward the main path. She had a 50/50 chance of it being Seryna. Given the somewhat meeker appearance of the asari in the corner, he had to guess that this was the one they were seeking.

"Seryna?" Shepard asked.

The brown eyed asari glanced up at the human in battle gear and armed with at least three different guns escorted by more of the same. She returned her attention to her console as if they were sporting pink dresses and lolly pops.

"Who wants to know?" She asked.

"My name's Shepard. Liara T'Soni said you might have information on Thane Krios."

"Tana, cover for me." Seryna told the other asari as she got up from her chair.

"Over here." She said, motioning for Shepard to follow her over to the large open window at the near the docking area. The design of the building shielded them from the high winds at their current altitude. They were easily twenty floors from ground level, if not more.

"Yeah, I know who Thane Krios is. I may have passed him some information, but I didn't hire him." Seryna said. "What do you want to know?"

"Maybe you could help me find him?" Shepard asked.

"I could tell you, but you wont stop him." She scoffed.

"We're not here to stop him." Shepard told her. "Only to make sure he survives."

"Oh! Well, he's in the Dantius towers. Over there. Working his way up to the penthouse."

Seryna pointed to two twin towers not far from where they were. Shepard eyed the towers, half glowing with orange light from the setting sun and half shadow. Seryna gave the two turians and the human with her. Whatever she saw, she volunteered more information.

"The second tower is still under construction. If Thane's smart, he'll go in from there."

"We'll find him."

"Not without some help. You don't just walk into Dantius Towers, especially now."

"Let me guess, you can help us out." Garrus said, the new edge he'd picked up living on Omega lined his words.

"I can get you in, but you only get one shot. You'd better be ready." Seryna told them.

Shepard looked back at him and he nodded the affirmation. They were ready. He was ready. He was always ready for trouble. This was not new information. He'd told her that shortly after they met. For a brief second his mind flashed to the memories of Eden Prime and the gun shot that nearly killed him. Saren's evil was still sending out ripples of consequences for those left behind.

"We're ready now." Shepard said.

"We'll go tonight, as soon as the shift workers clear out of tower two."

* * *

They had three hours to kill before they would meet Seryna back at the cargo transfer level where she would be waiting with a transport. They were half way to the transportation hub. There was no reason they couldn't find out what they could about Samara's location in that time. Shepard turned to Kryik, he could see the weariness in her eyes. She wasn't physically tired, but the stress was clearly getting to her. Sex only eased the strain enough to help them both get to sleep at night. Despite how exhausted they were, sleep came with more difficulty with their worries keeping them awake. He gave her forehead a brief nudge to try and offer support and comfort, hoping it somehow gave her a little added strength to finish the day. She offered him a grateful, but weak smile in return, giving his hand a subtle squeeze as she passed by toward the stairs that would lead to the hall for the transport hub. Miranda was waiting and the two exchanged quick words before Miranda headed back toward the trading floor. He wondered where Ms. Lawson might be going, but he would wait for Shepard to tell him if he needed to know. She was in charge of the mission. It was not his place to question her. Taking a few quick steps, he followed close at Shepard's side, Vakarian took the other. Nihlus glanced over at Garrus and a strange thought occurred to him. If something should ever happen to himself, Garrus would be the one he would want to take his place. He was a little rough around the edges, and there was some bitterness from some history over the last two years, but who didn't develop some of that after the Commander's death? Underneath the armor, he was a good man. He and Shepard were piratically best friends. He could make her laugh. It wasn't a thought he enjoyed, but it gave him some peace to know that Garrus was there for her if she needed him. He could put trust in that.

Transportation hubs were known to have a fair amount of foot traffic. This one was less busy than most he'd seen. A bit smaller too. There were a few kiosks selling everything from pet fish and model ships to guns and armor. He wondered if a few of the small, wiggling creatures in her tank would help her tension. Making a mental note to return and pick up a few, he kept pace with his Commander to the small, glassed in office for the Tracking Officer.

Dara hardly looked up as the four strangers strolled into her office. She continued to type at her console as she greeted them with cool professionalism.

"Can I help you with something?"

"We're looking for an asari warrior named Samara." Shepard answered.

"Wait, why?" Dara stood up from her chair. They had her full attention. "Did she kill somebody already?" She asked, nearly panicking.

"Calm down, I just want to speak with her."

"Good," Dara sighed with relief. "Samara's the first justicar I've seen on Illium. If I'm lucky, things will stay peaceful. She went to the commercial space port a few hours ago. If you wanna get there the pedestal on that balcony will summon a cab." She pointed.

"Just be polite when you meet her. Justicar's embody our highest laws and they usually stay in asari space. She's not used to dealing with aliens."

"Thanks. I'll make sure to not piss her off." Shepard nodded and left for the pedestal.

When they had gotten out of ear shot of the officer, Kryik leaned in to Shepard's ear. He was a little worried about her manors. She tended to be a little rude when she was tired.

"Shepard, perhaps I should speak with the justicar, given her unique occupation." He spoke low so she would not feel her authority was compromised.

"What? You don't think I can be diplomatic? I've had successful encounters with the Council, ya know."

It was good to hear her teasing. Perhaps he was over reacting.

"Okay, but if I sense you're feeling flustered, I will step in."

"Fine. The SDA is back, right?" She grinned up at him.

"Yes, exactly."

The ease of which she was willing to hand over control told him just how weary she really was. He promised himself to take her on a vacation as soon as he could, even it it were only for a day.


	45. Police Station

The Commercial Space Port must have been winding down or had a slow day. There was only a single ship loading cargo from one of the many docks. A nervous looking volus scurried about the cargo pads rushing his assistance to hurry. The police station took up one corner of a structure that held down the west end of the port. There was little to protect them from the winds up here and with it came the smells of the cabs zooming past and the scent of food from a million restaurants at dinner time. His stomach threatened to growl at him. Provisions were running low on the ship. They would need to pick up some more supplies before they deft Nos Astra or there might be a mutiny. The doors hissed open as they went inside the station. Detective Anaya looked up from her desk when the human and two turians came over to her. It was hard to miss the armor and guns. The corners of her mouth turned down as she pursed her lips into a hard line.

"Nice guns, try not to use 'em in my district. What can I do for ya?" the officer asked.

"I'm looking for an asari warrior named Samara." Shepard replied as she took the hard seat across from the detective.

"If you've got a score to settle with Samara, take it somewhere else. I've got more than I can handle here already."

"I need to recruit Samara for my mission. Then we'll be on our way." Shepard stated.

"Justicar's usually work alone, but they are drawn to impossible causes."

"We've got that covered." Garrus commented.

"If it'll get 'er outta my district, I'll get'chya to 'er asap. She's at the crime scene."

"You're awfully anxious to get Samara out of your district." Kryik pointed out.

"My bosses want me to detain 'er. They're worried she'll cause some kind of cross species incident. But the justicar code won't let her be taken into custody. If I try it she'll have to kill me. I have no interest in dying, so if you can lure her away with some big, noble cause before I have to carry out my orders, I'm _thrilled_ to help you." Anaya replied with a bit of sarcasm.

"How do I get to the crime scene?" Shepard asked.

"It's around the corner. Go outside take a left." Anaya pointed with the back of her head. "Look for the police line. I'll send word to let you in. Be careful. The local Eclipses mercs have been all over those back alleys lately."

"I have to go. Thanks." Shepard nodded and rose from the chair.

"Good luck." the detective called after her.

Kryik lead the way out of the station. He wasn't trying to take charge, just get the hell out of the damned station. He hated places like that. They only made him agitated. Officers sitting around, complaining about the crime and how much work they had to do and _doing _nothing about it. They were all too afraid of the rules to do their jobs. By the look on Garrus' face, he must have felt the same way. A silent exchange of thought passed between them when their eyes caught on each other. The two shared a knowing grin as Shepard passed between them with a cocked brow.

"What are you two loons all smiles about?" She asked with amusement.

"Nothing important. Let's go find Samara." Kryik answered.

"Keep your secrets then." She playfully punched them both on the arm. "I'll get the truth outta on o' ya!"

She was trying to keep herself going with humor, but the dark circles under her eyes betrayed her lie. These were the last two on her list of dossiers. Perhaps she would get some rest while the upgrades to the Normandy were completed. They still had to find a way to stop the Collectors though. He knew she would never really relax until the Reapers were stopped. Her drive was incredible, and dangerous to her health. He decided he may have to tie her down, but that would cause him to take certain actions that didn't allow sleep... at least not right away.


	46. The Justicar

The team crossed the blue glow of the holographic police line. The guards advised them of merc activity once more. They claimed to be waiting for back up. Kryik was disgusted. If he waited for back up every time the situation got rough, he'd never have become a Spectre and people would have died. He wasn't against telling them so when Shepard disappeared around the corner. He sighed and shook his head. She was always doing that to him. Running ahead and leaving him behind. His mandibles fluttered with frustration and excitement. She always kept him on his toes. Spirits, he loved her. Then he heard gun fire and quickened his steps. She'd already found mercs. Garrus wasn't much further ahead of him and he hadn't found cover either. They must have walked right into them.

Columns lined one side of the ally. Vakarian fell behind one of these to shield himself from the barrage of bullets fired his way. Shepard had ducked behind some steel crates. Everyone was safe but him. His shields sang as Eclipse fire danced across the barrier, flashing blue as they went. In his peripheral vision he saw Shepard's biotic toss the group of mercs back at least ten feet through the air. He took the opportunity to fire on them with vicious accuracy. Their head popped like melons inside their helmets as his rounds found the weak spot under the chin. Garrus seemed impressed and applied the tactic himself on those Kryik had missed.

"Where did you learn to do that?" Vakarian asked before the last asari released her last breath. "I could have used that trick on Omega!"

"I grew up around mercs and Saren groomed me for the Spectres. Between the two, I've learned an underhanded thing or two. I don't like to employ those techniques unless it seems prudent to do so." Kryik replied in his indignant Spectre tone. Whenever Saren was involved in the conversation he had a tendency to be colder.

"Okay, we're all impressed." Shepard said as she walked passed them. "Now if you _ladies_ are done_ chatting_, we have work to do."

She flashed him a quick smirk before leading them through the pools of blood on the floor. The alley dead ended into the wall of another building. The asari architects had waisted as little space as possible. Admirable if not cluttered. They could hear someone shouting on the other side of the door that linked the alley to a cargo hold. As the doors hissed open a body in Eclipse armor came sailing toward them through the air, screaming. Kryik immediately stepped in front of Shepard. He didn't think about it. He simply reacted. His pistol was in his talons and the bullet was in the chest of the mercenary before she hit the wall. Garrus' mandibles fluttered. Another asari, glowing blue with biotic power, chest exposed in a red, form revealing body, suit stormed across the bay. Her eyes were intent on the merc that lay grasping at her armored chest and the clean hole that was bleeding in it. The other asari pined the merc to the wall with her boot on her neck.

Shepard peeked out from behind Kryik to see what was going on. He felt her armored fingers clamp onto his arm and glanced down at her. She seemed to be unharmed. Her human curiosity plane on her face. Humans were unlike any other species in that respect, and she was unlike other humans. It seemed as though her nose poked out a little further as peered around him. He found it... adorable.

"The name of the ship. You're life hangs on the answer."

The asari's voice was as smooth and calm as a mountain lake in the spring. It was hard to accept such cool collection in the midst of a fight. Yet it stood before them with purpose and pose.

"You can kill me..." The dieing merc coughed blood onto the asari's red boots. "But one of us will take you down... Justicar!"

"What was the name of the ship she left on?" The justicar asked once more.

"Go to hell!" The merc coughed again.

Bloody spittle speckled her lips and chin. Disappointment and something like sadness crossed the justicar's face before her resolve steeled in her icy blue eyes.

"Find peace in the embrace of the goddess."

The justicar offered the death blessing, then snapped the merc's neck with one powerful, twisting motion on her leg and hip. Love of Sonya didn't keep Kryik from thinking the scene to be the sexist way he'd ever seen one kill another without weapons or biotics. Judging by the twitch of Vakarian's mandibles, he thought so as well. The justicar turned her attention to them just as Shepard straitened her stance beside him.

"My name is Samara, a servant of the justicar code. My quarrel is with these Eclipse sisters, but I see three well armed people before me. Are we friend or foe?" Samara said.

She spoke with an eloquence that seemed as though it had been employed many times before in similar situations. Shepard took a single step forward and addressed the justicar with confidence.

"I'm Commander Shepard, member of the SDA. These are my partners; Spectre Kryik and Officer Vakarian."

They each nodded respectfully when their name was mentioned.

"We need your help for a critical mission."

"You honor me, but I am in the middle of an investigation." Samara answered Shepard, but her eyes focused on Nihlus as if she'd seen him before.

"We're going up against the Collectors and I need the best. That's you." Shepard replied, boxing her shoulders reflexively, trying to gain Samara's attention.

"I sense the truth in what you say, and it humbles me. But I hunt an incredibly dangerous asari fugitive." Samara responded, her eyes returning to Shepard.

Her mouth opened to say more, but Kryik interrupted her before she began. His own exhaustion was wearing his patience thin.

"What sort of justice seeks out a single criminal while trillions of lives are at risk of a fate worse than death?"

"You are hardly one to speak of justice or honor, Nihlus." Samara answered with the coolness with which she had addressed the merc. "I am still bound by the code to kill you for your actions. I only hold back now out of repsect for your companions, and because I was impressed with your mannar of alluding me. Or have you forgotten your murder of the unarmed civilian?"

"Is this true?" Shepard asked, turning to face him.

He could see that she wanted to disbelieve the justicar's words. His memory of that time had grown fuzzy in his mind, but he had not so easily forgotten the weeks of cat and mouse games before he manipulated his escape. Saren had still been his friend then, and Shepard was merely another human, a name on a roster. He knew it might hurt her to hear that the justicar spoke the truth, no matter how far behind him that Nihlus was. But he also knew she would forgive him. No one had a perfect history. Not even justicars.

"Yes. It is. It was Citadel business. I do not regret my actions. Perhaps I should have told you long ago. There was never a point at which I thought it a relevant tale."

"Admitting your guilt will not save you. I am sorry, but you must pay for your crime." Samara told him.

The justicar lit up with blue flame and prepared to attack. Kryik moved for his gun when Shepard leapt between the two of them. Her eyes were hard as steel on the asari, her own biotics flaring.

"I can't let you do that."

"Shepard!" Garrus shouted, and took aim at the justicar. "You touch Shepard and you'll be next!"

"I must abide the code. This matter does not concern either you. Please, step aside." Samara requested. "I will not hesitate to kill you if you insist on intervening."

"Shepard, get out of the way." Kryik said, more to protect her than to be allowed the battle.

"No! I will not 'move aside'! He is a part of my crew and I will not allow you to exact your definition of justice upon him. He is an honorable turian and a good Spectre. Is there no room in our code for forgiveness?"

"I'm afraid not." Samara responded. "I hope you find peace wherever your soul may find it's final rest."


	47. Justice?

"I wish you were willing to go with the human, justicar. I've been ordered to take you into custody if you won't leave."

Detective Anaya stepped out of the shadows in time to interrupt the fray before it began.

"You risk a great deal by following your orders, detective." Samara said, not lowing her stance or taking her eyes from Nihlus. "Fortunately, I will not have to resist. My code obligates me to cooperate with you for one day. After that, I must return to my investigation and deliver justice to this turian."

"I won't be able to release you that soon." Anaya replied.

"You won't be able to stop me." Samara told her.

"There must be a way we can all get what we need without killing each other!" Shepard shouted.

"You need the name of a ship, right?" Garrus asked the justicar.

"Yes, the one the Eclipse smuggled a young asari off world on. She is an Ardat-Yakshi." Samara answered.

"If we get you the name of that ship, will you drop your claim on Nihlus' life?" Garrus asked.

"Sounds reasonable to me." the detective chimed in.

"My code prohibits me from honoring such an arrangement."

"Is there _nothing_ we can do?" Shepard pleaded.

"We could help you find the Ardat-Yakshi." Kryik suggested, his rifle aimed at her head.

"I must vanquish that evil myself." Samara answered. "Even if I agreed to let you help me, I could not aid you in your quest, Shepard. I could not be part of a crew which consisted of a member I have sworn to bring to justice."

"We can all just walk away. We'll find you the name of the ship and walk away."

"Shepard, I know this is a bad time, but we've got to meet our ride in half an hour." Garrus reminded her.

"_Goddamn it!_" Shepard shouted. "Fuck this!"

Shepard fired a biotic burst as strong as she could manage at the justicar. Kryik and Vakarian opened fire. The team backed away to the exit. Anaya ducked behind cover. She did not want to die that day. The biotic wave that came from Samara's body destroyed everything in it's path. The detective was spared by inches. Another burst flew from her, targeted directly at Nihlus. He pushed Shepard out of the way in time to take the hit. His life force was sucked from his body like a mosquito sucks blood. Garrus fired at the asari to break her concentration and stop whatever it was she was doing. None of them had ever seen a botic ability such as this before. Shepard recovered as quickly as she could, only to find her life mate writhing on the floor in agony.

"NO!"

She emptied her assault rifle on Samara, but the justicar's shields took most of the damage. Several shots made it to her flesh and broke her attack. She fell to her knees, holding her arm where a round had pierced her.

"Get him outta here!" Shepard shouted to Garrus. "I'm gonna fucking _kill_ this bitch!"

"Shepard, come on! We don't have time for this. He's not going to make it!"

Garrus' words seemed to snap her back to reality and she helped him carry Nihlus back to the cab. She carefully examined him with her omni-tool, but there were no physical signs of trauma. Nihlus' head rolled back onto the head rest with a groan. He was struggling to breath. His heart felt weak in his chest. Whatever the justicar had done to him, she had fulfilled her oath. It had felt like his body was burning to ash from the inside out. He knew he was going to die. He turned to Sonya, who was ever at his side. He could see her worry and her fear. He'd never known her to show fear. To see in in her eyes now pained him more than the attack that would end him.

"Sonya..." He whispered. He could hardly speak at all. "Sonya, I'm sorry."

"No, don't try to talk. We're going to get you to the Normandy. Dr. Chakwas and Mordin can..."

"Listen to me." He wheezed, cutting her off. "I don't have much time. I can hear the wind and the sound of the tall grasses singing."

"Shepard, he's hallucinating. We're not going to make it back in time." Garrus said, trying to prepare her for the inevitable.

"No. No. You're gong to be fine." Sonya whispered, stroking his fringe.

"Sonya..."

Nihlus reached to touch her face. She had to steady his hand and hold it to her cheek for him. All his strength was gone.

"Sonya, I... I love you."

The tears began to flow on both their faces. He'd never felt a worse agony than what he felt at that moment. Leaving her when she needed him most. He wold never hold her in his arms again, or brush away her tears. He would never again spar with her or go to firing practice with her. Never make love to her or wake to her scent. He would never buy her the stupid fish or an absurd model ship. He would never grow old with her.

"I'm sorry." He breathed. "Garrus, take care of her for me."

Garrus nodded to him from behind Shepard with a firm assurance, then activated his omni-tool and sent an emergency message to the Normandy.

"Don't do this. You're going to be okay. Just hold on!" Sonya encouraged him, pleaded with him.

He felt her lips on his, felt her warmth near him and smelled her musk and the scent of sweetness in the hair that would never again tickle his face.

"You can't die. I love you too much!" She whispered against his face.

Her dark eyes were the last thing he saw before his vision went black. They were wet and pained and full of a love in agony. Her lips were the last thing he felt before he lost feeling. Her voice telling him she loved him trailed off into silence. Then the sky opened up before him, blue with white clouds racing the winds. The scent of the tall green grass was fresh and invigorating. Then he heard another voice in his native tongue.

"Welcome back. Welcome home, son."

* * *

"Nihlus? Nihlus?" Shepard breathed her panic as she stroked his mandibles. "Nihlus, wake up! You've got to stay conscious! Nihlus!"

"Shepard," Garrus tried to console her with a hand on her shoulder.

"No!" She shrugged him off of her.

"No! He can't be dead! He wouldn't just leave me like this!"

"Shepard," He paused. He didn't know what to say. She wasn't herself, and understandably so. But they still had a mission to complete before the day was done and they were running out of time.

"Sonya," He spoke softly to his friend. "Sometime soldiers, even Spectres, die. He knew that and so do you. Grunt, the doctors and Jacob are going to meet us at the transport hub to take him to the ship. They'll do whatever they can. But you have to be a Commander right now. We have to get to Thane while we know where to find him. We have to stop the Collectors."

"Don't you think I know that!" She snapped at him, tears streaming down her tortured face. "I loved him, Garrus! I love him!"

"I know." He said and took her in his arms to comfort her through her sobs while she beat weakly on his armored chest.


	48. Tower Under Construction

The auto pilot on the cab returned it to the transport hub where the medical team and the muscle waited to rush Nihlus to the Normandy's med-bay. Dr. Chakwas had brought along a hover bed medi-transport. The white slab floated on the platform like a break in the scenery, as if none of it were real and the vid card was malfunctioning. Sonya turned away from Garrus and wiped away the wetness on her face as best she could with her hands. She looked back at Nihlus. His eyes were closed. She would never see their bright, piercing green again, or hear the flanging of his voice rumble through her. The tears threatened to fall again, but she choked them back. Garrus was right. She had to be Commander Shepard. She had to save humanity from mass genocide, and she had to do it without him.

Grunt, Jacob and Garrus loaded the turian's body onto the medi-transport. They strapped the body in to keep it from spilling to the floor. Sonya stood at the head, looking down at the white painted face. Her heart felt as though it had been ripped from her and the gaping hole now bled liquid fire. She stroked his mandibles and, in her grief, bent over his head and pressed her forehead to his one last time.

"Rest your fierce spirit in the After, my love." She whispered, then stood as the team took him away.

Both Mordin and Chakwas were running scans as they ran. But she knew it was more for her benefit. Nihlus Kryik, Spectre to the Citadel and life mate to Commander Sonya Shepard was dead. Her heart was not ripped out, though she wished it had been to keep her from feeling the agony of his loss. The spirit of mourning was a crushing weight on her chest and her heart was too strong to be squashed, so it suffered immeasurably. But she ran light on her feet to the rendezvous with Seryna. Miranda was there waiting for them when they arrived barely a minute early. She looked battle worn, but she was alive and in tact.

"I take it the justicar will not be joining us." Miranda said as the Commander and Vakarian approached her alone. "Where is Kryik?"

Garrus shook his head at her from behind Shepard. His meaning was clear in his knitted brow and the flash of pain over Shepard's features. She decided to drop any other questions.

"Was your own mission more successful?" Shepard asked bitterly.

"Yes, it was. Thank you for asking." Miranda responded, trying no to sound too boastful that she'd handled her situation single handedly. She had her own gains and losses to bare.

"I was beginning think you weren't going to show." Seryna said, standing beside the cab.

"We ran into some complications. Let's go." Shepard responded coolly.

* * *

Shepard did what she could to avenge the salarian workers that she witnessed being slaughtered at the gate and all the others whose deaths would haunt the memory of the survivors she rescued. The team move quickly spraying bullets and biotic fire into the waves of enemies that rushed to their doom. Asari were not the only members of the Eclipse mercs that protected the tower and those that were not died quickly. But the asari had the misfortune of being the same species as the justicar. Shepard fired on them with vicious reprieve. First she wounded them to stop their progress, then inflicted painful injuries that would kill slowly. A gut wound or shot to the main artery. Never a head shot. Never a round through the heart. She would use their bodies to knock others down or toss them over the edge of unfinished floors to smash into the ground below to die broken and bleeding internally. A few were spared the agony she would have tortured them with my mistake or by a well place grace from Vakarian's gun. He understood her rage. His own still harbored a place in his heart. Seeing his own emotions displayed on Shepard's face made him reconsider his plan to avenge his team with Sidonis' death. But Sidonis had directly caused the deaths of the team. These asari mercs had nothing to do with Nihlus' end. So his resolve remained in tact while he eased the passing of the asari unfortunate enough to catch the Commander's wrath.

The team exited the elevator that took them up to the cargo bay level. Directly ahead was a wall made of glass. In front of it stood a lone Eclipse merc on his com. Apparently the assassin had not been caught, but his presence was known, as well as theirs. Dantius was not happy about the three of them making it as far as they had. Shepard approached the merc with her weapon drawn. Grief and battle had not put her in the best of moods. Garrus had a feeling the merc was not going to get the chance to regret his misfortune of meeting her. He drew his own weapon and trained it threateningly on the merc.

"Turn around, slowly." Shepard ordered.

The merc pivoted at the hip in a half turn to see the three of them ready to fill him with holes.

"Damn it!" He muttered.

"Have you seen the assassin?" Shepard inquired

"Why are _you_ looking for him?" The merc asked casually as he backed away from her advancing steps. "You're not one of Nassana's mercs. Who are you?"

"Answer my questions and I'll let you go... maybe." Shepard replied.

"Look, _bitch_, even if I knew where he was I wouldn't tell _you_!"

"Not the answer I was lookin' for." Shepard said, leaning into his helmeted face.

"I've got nothin' more to say to you." The merc said, cocking he head smugly as he crossed his arms over his chest. "If you shoot me, my team's right thorough there." He nodded to the twin doors on either side of the elevator. "They'll be all over you."

Shepard splayed her hand over his chest, pushing him hard against the glass. His armor made a subtle clunk sound as it hit.

"What sound do you think you'll make when you hit the ground?" She threatened. "Think you'll live long enough to hear it?"

"Okay! Look, the last I heard, the assassin was down on the mezzanine. But the team on the bridge think they might have spotted 'em. Nobody knows for sure."

"Thank you for your _cooperation_." Shepard seethed, then shoved the merc mercilessly through the glass. Glowering, she leaned out over the precarious edge to watch him fall to his death.

"Don't you think that was a bit harsh, Commander? He did give us the information." Garrus asked.

"He was a merc. He's done plenty to deserve it, believe me." Miranda said.

"I did say '_maybe_'," Shepard told him, then headed for the doors to the cargo bay.

Garrus followed. He always followed her, always would. No matter what. He'd made a promise to a friend to take care of her, and he kept his promises. He would have done the job anyway. Shepard had become almost like a sister to him. She was practically family, only much more supportive. He took cover behind a stack of metal sheeting and steadied the but of his rifle on his shoulder. The scar on his face grazed the cheek rest. He owed her his life. A few scars and a life time of watching her back was a small price to pay. He pulled the trigger and fired on the FENRIS mech that was bounding toward her position.


	49. Can O' Woop Assassin

The bridge was absent of walls. The generators and environmental control units that would later be on the roof of the new tower provided cover from the merc's fire and canons, but not from the ferocious wind that threatened to blow them off the edge. It was a long drop and she didn't plan on making the trip. However, it was rather amusing to biotically toss the Eclipse to their doom. She was pretty sure she laughed a few times, but she couldn't be sure. Things kept twisting the knife of her pain. Things she'd never really noticed before, like the way she'd adapted his style of holding the gun to steady her aim and control the recoil better, or the way she altered her stance the way he's shown her. She caught herself employing his hand to hand techniques when an enemy was within range. Her eyes constantly averted from her target when she caught a glimpse of Garrus' fringe, for a brief moment thinking it was Nihlus. It was too much so close to his death and her mind was nearing the snapping point. She took risks that she should not have taken, relying heavily on her shields and her team mate's fire. It was wrong, and she knew it, but she couldn't help not caring. At least at the time. The last asari died with a right hook to the face hard enough to knock out teeth, and a field knife across the throat. Shepard snapped her neck for good measure before she released the asari's head fringe.

"Feel better?" Garrus asked, nearly out of breath for trying to keep up with her.

Miranda came up behind him, also panting and looking very upset.

"Are you mad? You nearly got us all killed!" She panted.

Shepard's chest rose and fell heavily as she was also trying to steady her breathing. Their words were distorted in her ears as if she stood under a water fall. The rumble of gun fire sounded in her ears with echoing report, though the fight was over. She didn't answer her comrades. She couldn't. Not without revealing the lump in her throat. She simply turned to the elevator that would take them to the penthouse. She kept her back to them on the ride up to hide the tear she couldn't blink back.

The elevator door hissed open. Shepard stepped into the room toward the only asari not in Eclipse armor. Beside her Vakarian and Lawson took aim at the merc of their choice. Nassana turned away from the slowly setting sun that shone in blindingly through her window. Her face twisted with disbelief.

"Shepard? But... your dead." Nassana stated as though her truth were infallible. Her guards raised and trained their weapons on the intruders.

"Well, as you can clearly see, I'm not." Shepard said, opening her arms wide as if to present herself as evidence.

"And now you're here to kill me." Nassana Dantius remarked sarcastically, placing a hand dramatically over her chest.

"You really are paranoid, aren't you?" Shepard scoffed.

"Don't patronize me, _Shepard_." Nassana waved a hand at her as she walked back to the window.

"Charming as ever." Shepard retorted with a smirk.

"I'm sure you find this all very ironic. First you take care of my sister and now you're here for me. Well, you made it this far. Now what?" Nassana asked. She turned and faced the trio, her eyes glaring through narrowed slits at Shepard.

"I'm not here to kill you, Nassana." Shepard told her. "That's not my job."

"Do you have another reason for destroying my tower? Decimating my forces?" Nassana asked, waving her hand around in frustration.

"I'm just looking for someone." Shepard said. She spoke with a chilling calm.

"You expect me to believe _that_?" Nassana asked angrily. Then her face changed to a knowing stare. "Is it credits? Is that what you want? Just tell me your price. We can make this problem go away."

She spoke with a confidence of her offer the way people with great wealth tend to do when they think their cash can put them above the law or spare their life. A low rumble echoed over head through the vents. Shepard's eyes flicked to the ceiling, then back to the Nassana as she stood with her arms crossed over her chest. Shepard would have put the Normandy of the betting table for the chance that Nassana wouldn't be so smug in five minutes.

"All the credits in the world won't make this problem go away, Nassana." Shepard mused.

Nassana's temper was shorting her patience as she walked toward Shepard, "Who the _hell _gave _you _the right to play god? I may not be _perfect_, but look at _you_. We both kill people for money. What's the difference?"

"You kill people because you think they're beneath you, or they're in your way. I kill people when they leave me no other choice. Or when they piss me off." Shepard said, with a thread of sarcasm woven through her words.

Another low rumble echoed in the ceiling. One of the mercs pointed the barrel of his rifle up an air shaft. The others swept the room, searching for signs of the assassin.

"You've got a choice. You don't have to do this," Nassana spoke softly, trying to weasel her way out of death. She could have been Satan as the serpent in Eden goading Eve to eat the forbidden fruit.

"I can tell you..."

She was interrupted when one of the mercs tapped her arm.

"_What_?" Nassana snapped viciously at the Eclipse commando.

"I heard something..." The merc replied, checking the corners for the umpteenth time.

"_Damn it_..." Nassana swore, leaning both hands on the console in front of her.

"Check the other entrances." She ordered. She pushed off the console and pointed the commando to stage left, then poked the same finger at Shepard.

"You stay put. When I'm finished dealing with this_ nuance_, you and I are going to ... Who...?"

While Nassana spoke, Shepard watched a figure drop out of the air shaft that the male merc had checked. A species she'd never seen before snapped the neck of the ill sighted merc, silencing his cry before it left his lips. In a blink of the eye, the assassin thrust his fingers into the throat of the nearest merc, sending her to the floor clutching at the ruptured air way. He caught the merc's weapon as it fell from her grip. The asari sent to check the entrances charged at him, bringing up her weapon to fire. The assassin was faster. Using the gun from the throat punch victim, he shot the commando in the chest. Dropping the used merc's gun, he caught Nassana's pistol in mid air when she dropped it in surprise. turning to see what was happening behind her. He caught her by the neck and forced the barrel into her ribs. His movements were agile, decisive and elegant, almost like a dance. A ballet depicting the coming of death to the battle field and he was the angle of death. He pulled the trigger. His face flinched the moment the shot sounded, muffled by her body. He cradled her in his arms as he lay her across the console, looking down on her as an angle might. He folded her hands over the fatal wound ritualisticly, as if folding them for her last prayer. The assassin took no notice of her or her team. Instead he lowered his head and poised his hands in front of him. He prayed.

Shepard could hardly believe it. The man who'd just murdered a room full of mercs and Dantius was praying. What the...

"Impressive. You certainly know how to make an entrance." Garrus complimented the alien. His weapon remained trained on the drell, despite his admiration.

Shepard took a few steps toward the assassin, "I was hoping to talk to you." She spoke softly, but with authority. She felt strange interrupting his prayer, but she didn't have time or patience for it.

Thane Krios glanced up at Shepard briefly, then answered with a soft, stern voice. "I apologize, but prayers for the wicked must not be forsaken." He shook his head lightly.

"Do you really think she deserves it?" Shepard scoffed.

He looked up at her a little confused, his brow knitted the lifted as he understood her intention.

"Not for her. For me."

His face took on a sorrowfulness that almost seemed hopeful that she would understand. She felt as though she felt what his oddly beautiful face expressed. He had clearly suffered great loss. Perhaps at Nassana's hands and the reason for his killing her.

"The measure of an individual can be difficult to discern by actions alone." He said with a suddenly critical tone.

Thane traced his hand along the edge of the console as he rounded it to stand before her.

"Take you, for instance. All this destruction…chaos. You marched in the front door and started shooting. Gunfire and explosions, I prefer to work quietly. If I have to fight my way through guards I've made a mistake. I rarely make mistakes."

He waved a hand in the air with a gracefulness akin to his combat. Shepard glanced at the dead asari on the console and thought bitterly of the justicar.

"I was curious to see how far you'd go to find me. Well…here I am."

Thane narrowed his eyes at her, waiting. He clasped his hands behind his back and puffed out his chest as if presenting himself to her. Had she not been fresh to grief or other wise spoken for in her heart and mind, She might have been profoundly interested in this mysterious stranger. As it was, the pain was too near and her heart was broken and bleeding. Her eyes found him attractive. Even exquisite, but the primal longing stopped there.

"I'm in no mood for games, assassin." Shepard said flatly.

Thane walked forward, towards the door, looking away from her. She found herself unable to take her eyes from his bright emerald scales. They reminded her so much of Nihlus' eyes. She wished Garrus would step in the way Kryik would have. She sorely missed having him at her side.

Thane kept his hands clasped behind his back. He stood in front of Garrus' muzzle, as if challenging the turian to shoot. Garrus held steady.

"Nassana had become paranoid. You saw the strength of her guard force. She believed one of her sisters would kill her." He stated looking back at Shepard over his shoulder. "You were a valuable distraction."

Shepard nodded to Garrus and Miranda to put away their weapons.

"Let's cut to the chase. I need you for a mission." She said crossing her arms. He was beginning to really irritate her already agitated state.

"Indeed?" Thane said. He cocked a brow plate at her.

"You're familiar with the Collectors?" She asked.

"By reputation." Thane answered

"They're abducting entire human colonies. Freedom's Progress was their handiwork." She told him.

"I see." He lowered his head a bit.

"We're going after them." She stated flatly.

Thane turned sharply to look at her, surprised? impressed? or perhaps he thought her insane. Maybe she was.

"Attacking the Collectors would require passing through the Omega 4 relay. No ship has ever returned from doing so."

Shepard was undaunted as she uncrossed her arms. "They told me it was impossible to get to Ilos, too."

"A fair point. You've built a career on performing the impossible."

Shepard was silently surprised he something about her. He turned away from her to gaze out the window of the office.

"This was to be my last job." He said as he closed his large, black eyes for a moment. "I'm dying." He told her, nodding his head slightly in her direction in something like a shrug.

"The mission is likely to be suicide. So I imagine it won't be a problem for you." Shepard replied bitterly.

"Yes, I suppose it's true that low survival odds don't concern me." He glanced at her, then returned his attention to the window. "The abduction of your colonists does."

"Not to sound ungrateful, but why dose the abduction of human colonists bother you?" Shepard asked, curious.

"Because they are innocent. The universe is a dark place, I'm trying to make it brighter before I die. Many innocents died today. I wasn't fast enough and they suffered, I must atone for that. A suicide mission might do. I will work for you Shepard. No charge."

Thane turned to face her and extended his hand. She noticed that the two center fingers were fused together on both hands and wondered if it was just him or if all drell had such appendages. Shepard took his hand shake as an unwritten sighing of the 'contract'. She shifted her weight to her back leg and crossed her arms again. He would be an interesting one. Though her curiosity was shallow compared to the anguish she fought to control. She walked ahead of the team as they left the empty building for the cab on the ground level. They couldn't get to the Normandy quick enough. She needed to be by his side, even if it was just his shell.


	50. Mourning

"Shepard, I'm so sorry. There was nothing we could do. Whatever happened to him it sucked the life right out of him."

Doctor Chakwas' words barely registered in her mind. The body had been left on the medi-transport. All the monitoring machine was still attached to his bed, but Chakwas was removing it. There wasn't anything of him left now but the carcass. Sonya sat by his side regardless. It was all she had left of him. She held his hand in both of hers. At first the she tried to hold back the tears, but the flood gates opened when she caught a glimpse of Garrus returning to the forward batteries simply because he was turian. Chakwas had instructed every one to keep their distance for a few hours out of respect. No one argued. When the tears dried up from dehydration, she stood, lightly caressed his face one last time, and left the room for her quarters.

The body was left in tact. There was no need for an autopsy. A detailed scan told them everything they could learn from the body. Nothing. There was no damage to his physical being, including the brain. The Normandy would not be returning to the Citadel until their mission was over. Meanwhile, Nihlus Kryik's remains would be kept safe in the main cargo hold on the hanger deck. It was the only space big enough for the cryo-coffin.

Sonya felt terrible for putting him in an ice box. He always hated the cold. She sat on the floor with her back to the center of the coffin. The tears stopped flowing hours ago, but the emptiness left behind still ached with the pain. It was her fault he was dead. If he hadn't pushed her out of the way... if they had just left... if Nihlus had remembered the justicar sooner... he might still be alive.

"Commander?"

A familiar voice floated over to her from the entry. She looked up slowly from where her head rested on her knees. It was Garrus. He'd left her alone the first few days while they waited for further instruction from TIM. She could only guess that he felt it time to begin fulfilling his promise. As he stood there waiting for her to respond, she felt nothing for him or whatever news had had to bring her. The sorrow had turned to numbness.

"Commander, TIM is waiting for you to contact him in the com room."

"Okay..." She spoke barely above a whisper. "I'll be there in a minute."

"Shepard," Garrus said, shaking his head.

He walked over to where she sat and took the floor next to her. He brought his knees up and rested his arms on them. For a moment he hung his head, then looked at her. The deep darkness of her eyes was a bottomless void. The coldness sent a chill through him that over powered the cold metal at his back.

"Shepard, you can't spend all your time down here."

He glanced at the pile of data pads that held the daily reports on the other side of her.

"You can't run the Normandy for the cargo hold. Moral is dropping. Nihlus wouldn't want you sulking down here in the dark. It isn't healthy."

"I just lost the_ love of my life, Garrus_!" She snapped at him. "It's hardly been a week and you're telling me to just _get over it_? _Fuck you_!"

"That's not what I meant." He responded calmly.

He tried to put an arm around her, but she pushed it away.

"I'm only trying to help. I care about you Shepard. You're like family to me. I hate to see you like this."

"Just go away." She mumbled. "Just go."

"I'm not leaving this hold without you, Shepard." He told her.

"Yes you are, that's an order!" She shouted.

Garrus' mandibles tightened along his jaw. He could be stubborn too.

"No, I'm not." He shook his head. "I swore to Nihlus that I would look after you. That means dragging you out of here kicking and screaming if I have to."

"Just try it!" Shepard growled.

"Fine!" He shot back.

His strong arms were around her in less than a second, securing her firmly to his chest. She struggled in vain as he picked her up off the floor and started literally dragging her to the door.

"Garrus! This is fucking ridiculous! You release me, NOW!"

She kicked him hard with her heel in the leg and tried to trip him up. But he was no stranger to the tactics and he countered her attempts to foil him. However, Nihlus had taught her well and she managed to free herself from his grip. A quick blow to the face and he was seeing stars.

"Shepard, don't do this!" He warned. "I was one of the top two hand to hand combatants of the last turian vessel I crewed on, remember?"

"Well_ this isn't _a _turian vessel_ and _I'm not _that little _tart_ you diddled _either_!"

Now he was pissed. Novea wasn't a _tart_. She had, in fact, been his first. The lingering emotions for her were wounded by Shepard's words and his blue blood boiled with rage. He charged her, knocking her to the ground, and pinned her down. In his anger, he brought his head down on hers nearly as hard as he could. Red blood smeared across her forehead. Her eyes fluttered, but she didn't loose consciousness.

"You _fucker_!" She shouted.

She tried to kick or punch or bite, anything to get away and retaliate. But Garrus wasn't playing around and he wasn't instructing. He was serious, and she wasn't getting out of this.

"_Goddamn you_!" She spat. "_Goddamn you_..."

Then emptiness of the well filled with water as all the emotions she tried to burry there bubbled to the surface once again. The tears came, uncontrolled and bitter.

"_Why did she have to kill him? Why did he have to die?_" She sobbed.

Garrus picked her up off the floor and sat holding her in his arms and she wept her sorrow into his chest. He had no words that could comfort her, so he held her and let her cry and bleed on him. He brushed the wild strands of hair away from her face and held her.


	51. Comfort Sought

"Shepard, I heard about the loss of your team member. I'm sorry." The Illusive Man said as she appeared over the hollo imager. "I trust that it won't distract you from the mission."

TIM took a long draw from his ever present cigarette. Shepard narrowed her eyes at him. If he were not a hollo image, she might have shot him. It hurt her head to scowl, so she glared.

"Kryik was an important member of my crew. He will be missed." She replied.

"The Spectre's death is regrettable, and it cost the mission the addition of another valuable member. Had I know their was a bitter past between him and the justicar, I would have found an alternate member. But now there simply isn't time. Be sure you don't let any personal feelings jeopardize the mission, Commander."

TIM eyed her warily. She didn't appreciate his callous or his threat. She crossed her arms and shift her weight toward him.

"Let's cut to the chase. What the hell did you want?"

"The turian's disabled a Collector ship. We have an opportunity to gather valuable information here, Shepard. Get your team together. I've already sent the coordinates."

The holo imager shut down before she could as any questions. She hated his dictator style of ordering her about. Something wasn't right about this mission. Activating her omni-tool she sent Garrus the message. She was about to send one to Nihlus as she scrolled passed his name, then stopped herself. He wouldn't be going on this mission. Or any mission. She selected the krogan instead. Udnot Grunt would fill in.

* * *

Shepard was pissed. Not only was it the same ship that had attacked her, but the Illusive Man had known it was a trap. As par usual, he had his reasons. After helping Thane reunite with his son and helping Garrus exact revenge on the Citadel, they were going after another derelict ship. A Reaper caught in the pull of a brown dwarf. She sat across from Thane in Life Support. Revealing his life story to her had made them good friends. It also helped her to deal with her own loss. Their common sorrow bonded them in a way she didn't share with Garrus. Though she understood his loss of an entire team, they were not life mates. He couldn't completely understand the way the drell could.

"You never told me what a Siha is." Shepard said, bringing up her question when he again referred to her with the strange name.

"One of the warrior angels of the Goddess Arashu. Fierce in wrath. A tenacious protector." Thane tentatively reached for her and then drew back his hand, uncertain if she would accept.

"I must confess, I've come to care for you." He blinked his inner eye lids. "Perhaps I'm being foolish. We are very different."

Shepard's heart pounded in her chest. Her eyes were wide with shock. She didn't know what to say. He knew of Nihlus, though he had never met him. She'd shared the stories as Thane had shared his stories of Irikah with her. He also knew how recently he had died.

"I could never replace your wife..." She replied.

Her words trailed off as she fought to control the lump in her throat. She did like him, and she couldn't deny the attraction, but it was too soon. Too close to his death. She needed more time, and time was something Thane didn't have. Maybe none of them.

"You wouldn't. You have your own place in my heart." Thane replied, his face as serene and sincere as always.

"I care for you too, Thane, but I'm not sure I'm ready to move on. Nihlus' death still weighs heavily on me. I need time."

"Time is something neither of us may have." Thane replied.

He reached for her hands. She let him take them. They were strangely warm. She'd expected the cool touch of a reptile. The tiny scales that lined his palm were smooth as silk. The sensation was very unlike a turian's hand and oddly arousing. Her eyes flicked up to meet his. She found herself pulled into the inky blackness. She wanted to be with him, but the pain was still to great.

"It is strange I should reawaken now, when there is so little time left."

He paused for a moment, feeling the warmth of her hands in his. He could see her sorrow in her dark eyes so exotically peering at him from her white features. He tried to think of something that might sooth her.

"Without death, how do we learn to appreciate life?" He said. He himself had learned this lesson almost too late. "I don't intend to let my body pass before it's time. I will watch over you." He smiled gently at her.

"I know." She said, thinking of Nihlus, thinking of Garrus.

Garrus was familiar and he had filled in for Nihlus where he could. But her bed was still empty at night and her heart was growing cold.

"Thane, I..." She paused as she studied his face. She had to deny him. It wasn't fair to either of them. he had to know that. "Thane, you're an intelligent man, and a handsome one." She noted the subtle smile on his lips when she told him that. She did her best to burn the image into her mind. "But it's too soon. I'm sorry. Perhaps if things had been different. Another life."

"I understand, Siha. I will respect your wishes. I hope you do not object to continuing our friendship."

"No. Of course not." She offered a weak grin as she gave his hands a squeeze.

A moment of silence passed and Shepard decided she should go. For the first time, Thane rose with her. She thought he meant to walk her to the door, but instead he blocked her path as she rounded the table. She looked at him, his strange and alluring eyes seemed to penetrate her soul.

"I wonder," He began, speaking low and soft, his flanging tones reminding her of another's voice she missed more than anything. "would it be acceptable in this moment to..."

His right hand went slowly to her cheek. When she did not pull away, he slipped the fingers into her loose hair, satisfying his curiosity of the alien fibers. He grinned again at the feel of it.

"Thane." She whispered.

A nervous knot built in her gut. Butterflies soon jointed it when his free hand cupped her other cheek. His face neared hers, his eyes darted from her equally dark orbs to her wanting lips. It had been so long since she kissed real lips, her forgotten desires tingled the skin in wonton for the renewed memory.

"Thane... we shouldn't..." She protested weakly.

His lips touched hers. They were not like human lips that she remembered. They were smoother, firmer without being hard. Electricity seemed to spark as the knot pushed up into her chest and the butterflies descended to her loins. Her lips parted and his tongue quickly found it's way to hers. So similar and so different. Intoxicating. Literally. Her knees felt weak and she lost her balance and fell against him. His denser muscles were hard under the smooth leather of his vest. His hand left her cheek to wrap around the small of her back and hold her to him. Her own fingers slid up his chest to run over the frills over his cheeks to wrap around the back of his crested head. Everything felt amplified. Her skin was on fire where he touched her. Her lips and tongue tingled with the pleasure of his kiss. For a few seconds she opened her eyes. His were closed, allowing himself to be lost in the moment. Her vision seemed fuzzy, brighter, as if in a dream sequence filled with a misty light. The floor beneath her feel began to feel unstable, doughy. Yet, when she closed her eyes again and let him support her the dizziness and light headedness wasn't so noticeable. She felt a gradual pressure against the back of her knees, then the sensation that she was falling very slowly. Her eyes fluttered open to see the ceiling over his cot spinning over her.

"I don't feel.. well." She said, closing her eyes and putting a hand to her forehead.

"You're hallucinating." Thane told her from somewhere beyond her vision. "You will recover soon."

"Hallucinating? Why am I..." She tried to ask but her mind was slipping from her control.

"Apparently oral contact with drell physiology has caused a reaction of your nervous system. I did not know the reaction would be so strong. I apologize."

"Thane?"

"Yes, Siha?"

She felt his hand on her face.

"Make love to me."

"Siha, you have said you are not ready for a relationship. I cannot commit my body to you outside of love. And your mind is not sound at this time."

"My mind is fine, I'm just seeing things."

She dismissed the notion and opened to eyes to see him looking down at her. His face was the only thing that didn't swirl around her. Though the colors seemed brighter. His avocado scales became emerald. The black pentagon on his forehead, the stripes and speckles were deep space. The red of his throat seemed as red as molten rock. His silvery blue chin was almost like marine stone. And his eyes. She could see his vivid green irises without excessive light surrounded by bottomless wells of black.

"Please. You are right. There is not time to dwell on the past. We must move on with what little life we have left."

"Very well. I will do as you ask. But you must understand that I do this because I care for you, not for carnal pleasure."

She closed her eyes again. She could hear the movement of fabric and the distinctive sound of zippers coming undone. Her own clothing was removed from her body by skillful hands that glided over the newly exposed flesh. She opened her eyes to see him. She'd never seen anything more beautiful. The pattern of scales and the stripes over his head and shoulders continued down his arms, hips and legs. The stark contrast of the red, hard member that protruded from him made the large, ribbed organ all the more remarkable. He seemed to be admiring her just as much as she lay seductively across his cot. He neared her slowly, then slid over her form as fluid as water. She wrapped her legs around his silken body as he settled over her. She felt the pressure of him against her wetness and closed her eyes expectantly.

"No."

She opened her eyes again to look into his when she heard the protest.

"I want you to see me. See into me as I see into you."

He cradled her beneath him as he pushed his way into her. Maintaining eye contact was difficult as she arched into him. The green centers of his eyes held her intently and she felt as though she might drown in him. He was not the same as Nihlus. A little smaller and the ridges more smooth, but his shape massaged her in a different way. His strokes were slower and more about movement than pressure and depth. He was an entirely new sensation. Every pulse, every throbbing thrust was amplified by the hallucinatory effects. His weight was crushing, but it was a welcome discomfort in exchange for the waves of ecstasy that flooded her senses. His lips were constantly on her. She moaned softly as he kissed her mouth, her chin, the sensitive skin behind her ear and along her neck to the hollow and across her collar to her shoulder. His hands curiously explored her breasts and the nipples that hardened at his touch. Her own fingers found pleasure in trailing over the stripes that decorated him. His nippleless chest was firm and smooth as it glided over hers. The flash of red from the folds of his throat enticed her lips to tease them, urging purrs and groans from the drell. He lifted himself off of her to view the point of their joining. The sight that met her eyes was colorful and beautiful. He seemed to almost be a part of her. Her lips clung to him as he slid out of her, then were pushed aside as they welcomed him back. His mouth was back on hers with fevered need as a purr rumbled deep in his chest.

Her body tensed as she neared orgasm. She moaned louder when the release came, and he with her. She could feel him release his seed within her, less waterythan turian cum and some how heavier. Unlike other species, he came as often as she did. Perhaps more, but in smaller amounts. The intensity built within her for the last time. As her body tightened around him he shuttered above her, releasing a steady stream as he climaxed for the final time. The deep endlessness of his eyes never left hers. Her own bliss followed his wake, and she gasped his name.

"Thane..."

When his body left hers she expected some of the seed to spill out, hot and wet, the way _his_ had done. Only a little dribbled out, and even that was what had cling to him upon his exiting her. It was stickier than humans, but white, and much thicker, like plasma coolant.

The cot was small, but with some adjusting, they found a comfortable position. Most of her lay over him, her head on his chest, as he held her in his arms. She was still hallucinating. Everything had a halo of light. His fingers stroking her hair ticked her back. She sighed, content and comforted. He purred and she listened, with some regret over what she'd done, to the brief rumble and his long, labored breathes. His heart beat steadily like a clock keeping the time until his death. Could she love him now, only to loose him later? Could she survive another loss so great so soon? She let the thought pass as she gave in to sleep, her heart still heavy with the loss of Nihlus and the fleeting hope of happiness with Thane. Hours later, she rose from his bed, dressed and looked down on him once again. He was beautiful. She remembered his face when he smiled, how serene and angelic he looked when he filled her with the passion of his labor. Then she kissed him as he slept and left for her quarters.


	52. Friend or Foe

"There are too many shadows." Thane commented as the trio entered the entry corridor.

Shepard agreed with him. It was a creepy place to be, which Garrus suggested rather creatively.

"Exploring an abandoned area, expecting something mechanical and nasty to jump out at any moment. Just like old times..."

"Indeed." Thane muttered.

"That didn't make me feel better, Garrus." Shepard said sternly, then shot him a subtle grin.

She was trying to convince him that she was okay. That she could handle the mission. Her visits to the cargo hold where Nihlus' body lay frozen in stasis had dropped dramatically over night. He'd expressed certain concerns for her emotional and mental state. She normally told him everything, so her sudden reluctance to tell him how she was feeling or especially what she was thinking had put his flags up. She just couldn't tell him what she and Thane were doing in the night hours. She couldn't tell him that the drell visited her in her quarters some nights for quite intimacy that took her mind off the pain and filled her body with pleasure. She could even manage the hallucinations now. Things didn't spin anymore. She only felt the ecstacy of his touch amplified. No. She absolutely could not tell him _that_. Her turian friend would likely go _nuclear_ on her. And there was something else. It wouldn't become an issue for a few more months, _if_ it was even _possible_. It could just be stress. She pushed the worrisome thoughts aside and concentrated on hacking into a wall safe.

"Thane, check the consoles. See if you can access any recordings." She ordered quietly. No need to wake anything 'nasty' up.

He nodded and silently crossed the room. She furrowed her brow when Garrus gave her a hard look.

"What?" She asked in a low tone.

"Not now. I'll talk to you later." Garrus shook his head. "Let's just get through this."

He didn't sound happy. Not that she expected 'sunshine and bunnies', as Joker would say, but there was more to it than the pressure of the mission. Maybe she should have continued to avoid him. He was awfully moody. She left the safe open and met Thane at the end of the hall. The last vid recording had just finished playing.

"Anything useful?" She asked.

"The crew working on board appear to have developed different reactions to the ship. They were becoming paranoid and delusional. One of the lead scientists began conversing with samples."

"So something was causing them to go loony. Great. Why can't we ever go someplace nice?" Garrus commented.

"Let's keep moving."

She lead the team to the air lock separating the corridor from the main ship. The doors must have been set to detect motion, opening when the team approached them. The floor beneath them rocked violently the moment the air tight seal was broken. Shepard grabbed for the wall, the door frame, anything to keep from tumbling to the floor. Her flailing limbs found the sure and steady grip of Thane's hand. As if by his command the ship stopped it's quaking. She glanced over her shoulder to nod her thanks. She noted that the folds of his throat were puffed up a bit more than usual. Apparently the shake had startled him a bit more than he was likely to ever admit.

"Normandy to shore party." Joker's voice came over the com.

"What just happened?" Shepard asked.

She succeeded in her attempt sound calm, or at least unafraid. Wasn't that what being brave was? Being afraid, but doing going on anyway? Incapable bravery was labeled as foolishness after the would be hero was dead. She hoped she was capable to achieve the task ahead.

"The Reaper just put up kinetic barriers. I don't think we can get through from our side."

"We're trapped. How disquieting." Said Thane.

"That's an understatement." Garrus scoffed.

"We'll have to take down the barriers from in here." Shepard said over the com. "Any idea where the controls are?"

"At the moment of activation, I detected a heat spike in what is likely the wreck's mass effect core." EDI responded. "Sending the coordinates now. Be advised. This core is also maintaining the Reapers' altitude."

"So when we take the barriers down to escape, the wreak falls into the planet core." Shepard restated the inference.

"And that means everyone dies. Yeah, got it." Said Joker.

"If any helmsmen can pull us off this thing before it reaches crush depth, it's you." She told her pilot. Spirits, she hoped she was right. "We'll make a sweep for survivors and recover what data we can. Stand by."

"Aye, aye. Good hunting." Joker responded.

Shepard nodded to her team and they moved in. Mutilated corpses lay on the floor, barely recognizable as ever having been human.

"I've heard stories, but I never... believed they were true." Thane spoke softly in disbelief.

Shepard tried to avoid looking at the bodies. The smell was enough. She didn't need to see the gore. It looked too much like the lasagna she had for lunch. Another console was positioned on the railing over looking a very large tunnel lined with tubes. It had a recording of two crewmen discussing a memory. One they both seemed to think was their own. If she wasn't afraid before, she certainly was now. She didn't know how long it took for memory sharing to occur, but whatever this ship had done to the science team, she didn't need it to happen to her. She was well on he way to crazy without any help, thank you.

"Sounds like they were being indoctrinated." Garrus said.

The turian was about as at ease as a varren in the fighting pits on Tuchanka against an opponent that was much bigger and a little insane. Shepard continued down the ramp to the right of the entry. A few steps down the ramp Garrus hesitated, reaching for his weapon as if he saw something, then relaxed. Shepard passed a tank full of explosive matinal when a husk crawled over the edge of the catwalks, hissing.

"We've got company!" Garrus shouted.

"I've noticed." Shepard called back.

"Shepard! Behind you!" Thane warned.

She glanced back in time to see the head of the husk explode as both Thane and Garrus put a round through it's skull. Stepping over the body, Shepard sent a rain of fire out before her as she backed up the incline. Shepard waited for a group of husks to converge near the tanks then shot several rounds into the containers. The resulting explosion took out the remaining husks, but more would come soon if they didn't move quickly. They ran down the ramp and passed a console. It didn't matter what it said, they knew enough. They started up the ramp on the other side of the dip between sections. Three shots came from the next room taking out the three husks that ran from their attacker. Someone was still alive, and a damn good shot. Shepard cautiously rounded the bend. There were two sets of stairs, one against each wall. She took the short flight nearest to her to the main floor. Garrus took the other. Whoever had fired the shots was no longer there.

The room was daunting. Large crates lined the railing. The walls were black with more could see dragons teeth off bow of the balcony. The outline of bodies could be seen impaled on the large spikes. Thane came up behind her, close enough that she could could feel his spicy breath on her neck. She could almost smell him, something similar to thyme and curry.

"Siha,"

The name sent a shiver over her skin beneath her armor. Even here, the memories of their intimate moments stole her thoughts, kept them from dwelling on something that might emotionally compromise her and thus the mission.

"This room is not empty."

Shepard nodded. She shared his foresight in this matter. There was defiantly something or things in this place. As her foot hit the floor panel entering the room proper, husks crawled over the ledges of the floating room and ran toward them, some of them in flames. The sound of Garrus' gun shots boomed across the battle field. Shepard threw several back over the edge to their second deaths, her body surrounded with blue flame. Thane combined his biotic attacks with hers, the two of them alternating between throw and warp to slow or toss their targets. The large abomination inching toward them send it's own dark energy shock wave at them, knocking Shepard off her feet. Husks were on her like flies on death. She fought her way free only to be knocked down again by another blast from the abomination. Garrus fired a concussive shot over her head followed by several rounds of shedder ammo, covering Thane as he ran to her aid. Thane hit one with the butt of his rifle and used his powerful arms to pull one off her back. She scrabbled to her feet, shooting behind her as she and Thane retreated. Shepard was screaming at Garrus to fall back. He did so without letting up on the fire. Thane waited for her to back up the stairs first, then he dropped to one knee and fired on any husk that got to near. Shepard concentrated her attacks on the abomination, slowly wearing it down. When it passed a flammable tank she lit up the container with incendiary rounds. The final resulting explosion rid them of the barrage of fodder.

"I hate fighting through sleeping sentient ships." Garrus commented nervously. "They're worse than hospitals."

Shepard grinned, remembering his words on Tuchanka on the mission to rescue Mordin's ex-team mate. She never lost a nights' sleep over the salarian's death, though Mordin seemed to regret more than the necessity of the action. _Telle est la vie_.

"I'm _sorry_, Garrus. They were all out of gardens, electronics shops and classy antique stores." She teased, hoping that whatever had put him in a fowl mood at the beginning of the mission had run it's course.

Thane cocked a brow at her. She just shrugged. She couldn't really explain it right then anyway. Garrus hacked through the next set of doors. The hall on the other side was empty, as was the open line of cargo bays beyond. Shepard wasn't taking any chances, regardless of what it looked like. They already knew that to be deceptive. She motioned for Thane to take cover on the right behind a crate. She took a few more steps when the soft sound and slight wind of bullets passing over her shoulders kissed the air by her cheeks. Behind her she heard something hit the ground. Husks. Some one just... She spotted something a dozen meters away. It was a geth.

"Shepard, Commander." it's mechanical voice echoed over to them.

Garrus looked at Shepard then back to the geth. It was gone.

"Geth never operate alone. Aren't they smarter the more of them there are? We should watch our backs." Suggested Garrus.

"Even in large number a geth has never been reported as speaking an organic language." Thane pointed out.

"It just helped us. I need to know more..." Shepard cut herself off when husks started climbing over the edges of the walkways. It seemed to be their favorite thing to do; come out of the wood work like termites then run at her flailing and howling. It was a short lived charge as she and her 'boys' took out each of them as they came. More husks and more abominations. Shepard was getting worried they might not make it off the boat alive. Part of her selfishly did not care. Thane could distract her with a look or a word, but Garrus was a constant reminder. She felt guilty for doing exactly what Nihlus had done to her, though she was dead. So was he. Maybe if she delivered everything TIM asked of her and more, she could convince him to use what they learned during project Lazarus for Nihlus! The epiphany did not give her the hope or comfort she'd thought it would. Though Thane would no likely life long enough to meet a resurrected Kryik, she would have to face him knowing that she'd been dishonorable. Only her sin may have farther reaching consequences. A bullet glanced off her shields and she boxed the thoughts and shoved them hap-hazardly on a shelf in her mind. She would have to ponder such possibilities later.

Another hacked door. An air lock. The information the science team had gathered was inside, but not the science team itself. Shepard assumed the science team had not survived or had been turned into the husks. She moved on. When the doors to the core opened, their path was blocked by a energy field. They could see the geth they'd encountered earlier manipulating a console in front of the core. Half a dozen husks were making their way toward it. It shot the closest few in the face. Their heads exploded and the bodies crumpled to the ground. It finished doing whatever it was doing. The barrier deactivated. When it turned around, a husk hit it, knocking it to the floor and off line.

"We need to get to that console." Instructed Shepard, and she let the bullets fly.

The core was massive. After retrieving the IFF she would need to destroy it. Testing with her fingers to make sure the weight on her back was really there she found the large barrel of Cain. Bless Mordin for being such a damn genius. When they'd cleared the main walkway Shepard ran to the console, careful not to trip on the geth.

"Cover me!" She shouted.

Her boys nodded to her and resumed filling husks full of holes and blasting them with biotic waves of destruction She shoved the memory device into the slot and retrieved the Friend or Foe Identification code. A few more buttons and the armor around the core opened. Husks were swarming over the ledges on the lower decks. They would over take them soon. Shepard unclipped Cain and took aim at the heart of the core.

"Hold to something!" Shepard shouted.

She had no idea what this thing was going to do. She pulled the trigger. Everything was engulfed in a bright white light. It knocked out her shields and threw her to the floor. When she could see again, everything had a red tent to it. She got up and ran over to the geth. It had helped them. Probably saved their organic asses. She noticed the N7 armor welded on one side.

"I want to bring it." Shepard told Garrus when he ran up to her.

"I think that's a bad idea, Shepard. We've got enough problems."

"It's behavior was... odd. It spoke. Perhaps we should bring it." Thane pointed out.

"Tali said no one's ever captured a geth in tact." Shepard said. "And I want to know why it has N7 armor attached to it."

"There's no time to argue." Garrus snapped.

Shepard hoisted it onto her shoulders and stumbled. It was heavier than she thought it would be. Thane took the other side of the machine. He helped her drag it to the platform where the Normandy was waiting for them. Garrus provided the cover fire. Every husk left was coming out of hiding to bid them a fond farewell. The docking doors opened on the port side of the Normandy. Sonya and Thane hurled the geth across the gap and onto the ship. She turned and fired into the growing number of husks running at them.

"Siha!" Thane shouted, insisting that she jump.

"No! I'm the commander. I go last." She shouted back.

He didn't argue. Garrus' mandibles twitched but he made the running jump across the gap. Shepard fired off a few more rounds before turning on her heels and running to the Normandy. The weightless feeling of jumping the divide was elating and terrifying. Each of her team caught one of her hands and helped pull her onto the ship as she crossed the distance safely.

"We're clear. Go." Shepard said into the com.

Joker didn't respond with words. The Reaper was exploding and he didn't plan on sticking around for the show. Garrus looked at the geth on the floor then up at Shepard.

"I hope you know what you're dong. I can't protect you from yourself!"

He glared at her then at Thane. The drell took a defensive posture and moved to stand slightly in front of Shepard. The notion confirmed what his senses had already told him. He could smell the drell on her, and she on him. It was disgraceful. It was the final straw. His blood boiled over even as the Normandy's FTL drives kicked in.

"And this!" He gestured to Thane. "Are you insane? Have you no respect for the dead, for what you meant to him? He's not even _buried_ yet and _you're _doing _exactly_ what _he_ did when _you _died! What if Cerberus can bring him back like the did you?"

"Don't you think I haven't thought of that!" Shepard shouted. "Nothing says that they _will_! Or that he'll survive! We all may have a shorter life expectancy than we'd like to admit. Why can't I find some comfort and some happiness before we 'throw ourselves into _hell_ for the good of the galaxy'?" She quoted him.

"Face it, Shepard! Nihlus is dead and you can't handle that! Thane is just a unfortunate bystander who got caught up in your wallowing! If you can't see that, then you're not the Shepard I know. You're not the Shepard that bonded with the turian lying cold in the main cargo bay! Hell, I'd be surprised if you ever really loved him!"

Shepard couldn't stop the tears then. His words stung like acid over the wound.

"You are both correct and I have been a fool." Thane interrupted with his accustomed calm, placing himself between them. He turned to Garrus.

"Shepard is capable of making her own decisions. As her friend you need only be there for her if ever she should have need of you. Any oath you have made, you are honor bound to keep."

Then he turned to Shepard. A single hand cupped her cheek.

"You, my love, have not properly mourned the death of your mate. The wound is still fresh in your heart. I will treasure our time together and I will comfort you as your friend, but you need time to heal regardless of how much time there may be. If we survive the mission, I will be here waiting."

He lifted her chin with thumb and forefinger and lightly kissed her lips. He was not ashamed to let her see the tears in his eyes that echoed her own before turning away from her. He kept his dignified poise as he made his way to the elevator and then to Life Support. He needed to meditate.


	53. Lean on Me

Shepard glared at Garrus through her tears. She couldn't be more pissed off at him. Not only had he poked a stick in her pain, but drove off the one think that seemed to make it go away.

"Fuck you, Garrus. Goddamn fuck you." She growled.

She roughly wiped away the tears and tried to pick up the geth. Garrus lean in to help her and she pushed him away as hard as she could. He stumbled and hit the wall before he could catch his balance.

"I'm sorry, Shepard, but even Thane agrees with me. You're not taking the time to deal with this."

"You're sorry, hu."

Shepard dropped the get and walked over to where Garrus leaned against the hull. She stood toe to toe with him until her face was almost to close for her to focus on him. Her dark eyes burned like coals.

"Maybe you're right. Maybe it doesn't matter." Her voice was calm but venomous. "Maybe Nihlus and I are more alike than anyone imagined. It doesn't make it okay, but it helped the pain. It helped me focus on the job at hand and not the fact that my _soul mate_, the _love of my life_, is in an _fucking ice box in the goddamn hangar bay like a bloody piece of CARGO_!"

The last of her words climbed up the decibel ladder until she was screaming the word 'cargo' in his face with hot tears streaming down hers. She felt like grabbing his mandibles and ripping them off, but instead she turned away and continued to drag the geth to the elevator. Garrus stood there for a moment, wiping the spittle off his face. He'd never seen her like this, but he'd never been like this either. Nihlus was a good friend to both of them. It was like Alchera all over again. He was still pissed, just as she was, but she was his friend and one of the few. He pushed off the wall and went to help her. She tried to push him away again and stumbled under the weight of the geth. He caught her in time to save her from face planting on the floor. She allowed him to help her to her feet. Then he took the other side of the geth. He wasn't going to let a fight stop him from being her friend. They'd been through too much together to give up. The elevator opened and they hobbled inside.

"Where to, Commander?"

"The A.I. core."

Garrus hit the button for the crew deck, then readjusted the geth's weight on his shoulders. He glanced over at Shepard. He could tell she was straining to support the geth. She was also struggling emotionally, blinking back tears she was too angry to let him see.

"We'll get through this together. I promise." He told her.

"Will we?" She scoffed. "Don't make promises you can't keep."

His mandibles twitched. If she wasn't a female human, he's swear he was talking to Nihlus. The anger, the bitter hurt, the seeking of sarigate company... Maybe his experience with this reaction with Nihlus would help him better understand it. Maybe he could actually help this time instead of pushing his friend further down the path.

"Shepard, I'm not going to go away."

"Because of you oath?" She sneered.

"No. I would have dedicated myself to the task anyway."

Shepard sighed and the doors opened.

"I'm sorry, Garrus. Thanks. Now let's get this thing locked up. I think there's someone else I should apologize to as well."

"Aye, aye, Commander."

* * *

The doors hissed open and Shepard walked into Life Support. She'd changed out of her armor and the civies she now wore left her feeling even more exposed than she already felt.. Thane was sitting in his chair, the ever present cup of tea rested on the table within an easy reach of his poised hand. She stood a good distance behind him until he tilted his head and acknowledged her.

"Shepard, do you need something?"

She forced herself to take the steps to sit in the chair across from him. She kept her own hands in her lap. Her eyes glued to the table with guilt and shame. What kind of person had she become to do this to someone? How could she do what Nihlus had felt so much dishonor for doing to her? How could she look Thane in those beautiful deep eyes and tell him any of that? Then his soft words broke into her thoughts and her eyes reflexively flicked up to his. His kind expression only made the feelings worse.

"Siha," He waited for her to meet his gaze. "I do not hold any bitterness. You need not be so distraught."

"You are very kind." Sonya responded, fighting the lump in her gut. "But I have wronged you and shamed myself. I've dishonored his memory. I can't even face the truth. The survival of civilizations is depending on me and I'm falling apart."

Thane rose from his seat and went to her. She tried to leave, not wanted to make another mistake, but he took her in his arms. She resisted weakly, then let the tears fall against his neck. After several moments of vulnerability the tears subsided and she slipped her arms under his jacket and around his dense waist. If felt good to hold him and be held.

" A human artist from the late 1800's of Earth, Vincent van Gogh, once said; Love is something eternal; the aspect may change, but not the essence. You will always love him, Siha. Just as I will always love you. I cannot be for you what he was. In time we may have the opportunity to grow into something new. As for your actions, I forgive you for your misjudgment. I could have prevented it, but I did not. I allowed my own selfishness to influence my actions and I must atone for that."

"Thane, you have nothing to be sorry for."

He appreciated her candor, and her readiness to forgive him, but it made him feel no better about the situation. His own emotions were in turmoil inside him. He wanted to be with her. To share what was left of his life with her. To kiss her pain away and love her long into the night, but it could not be. As he truly cared for her, his own wants had to come second to what was best for her. New wounds must heal before she could honestly love him in return. A single tear left his eye and trailed down his cheek to be absorbed in her hair. Her scent reminded him of the first spring flowers on Kahje... and Irikah.


	54. Machines

"Ten hut!" The soldier saluted Shepard as she approached the geth.

"I'm turning this thing back on. Be ready." Shepard ordered the guard on duty.

"Aye, aye."

"I have put up extra fire walls. I am prepared to resist any hacking attempts." EDI alerted her.

"Good. Let's turn it back on."

She examined it briefly before activating her omni-tool. She could help but think of Nihlus as the geth lay before her, virtually dead, and she was bringing him back. She taped a few buttons. Electricity shimmered over the geth, but nothing happened. She taped a few more. Another wave. A finger twitched.

The light that was central to it's 'face' lit up with a piercing glow. Metal on metal clanked as it rose from the shelf it was on as it sat up. Seeing Shepard, it and stood up to face her. Shepard waited a few seconds to see if it would do or say anything. It didn't.

"Can you understand me?"

"Yes."

The mechanical sound of it's voice processors echoed in the small space.

"Are you going to attack me?"

"No."

This was not an unexpected answer because of it's actions on the Reaper. She wanted to know why it didn't shoot her and why talked.

"You said my name aboard the Reaper. Have we met?"

"We know _of_ you."

"You mean; I've fought a lot of geth." Shepard said, lowering her tone.

"We have never met." It's light followed her like a giant eye as she paced.

"No, you and I haven't, but I've met other geth."

"We are all geth, and we have never met you." It matched her stride. "You are Shepard, Commander. Alliance. Human. Fought Heretics. Killed by Collectors. Rediscovered on the Old Machine."

"Old Machine. You mean the Reaper?"

"Reaper. A superstitious term originating with the Protheans. We call those entities Old Machines."

"What do you mean 'heretics'?"

"Geth build our own future. The Heretics asked the Old Machine to give them the future. They are no longer part of us. We were studying the Old Machine's hard ware to protect our future."

It's response created more questions than it answered.

"Are the Reapers a threat to you too?"

"Yes."

"Why would they attack other machines?"

"We are different from them. Outside their plans."

"You seem to know an awful lot about me."

"Extra-net data sources. Insecure broadcasts. All organic data sent out is received. We watch you."

"You watch _me_ or you watch organics?"

"Yes."

"Which?"

"Both."'

Shepard felt nervous. Why would the geth be watching?

"What future are the geth building?"

"Ours."

"Will anyone else be affected by whatever it is you're doing?" Shepard was learning to hate interrogating a machine.

"It they involve themselves, they will."

Shepard took a step toward the energy field between herself and the geth. It matched her movements.

"So, you're not aligned with the Reapers?"

"We oppose the Heretics. We oppose the Old Machines. Shepard, Commander opposes the Old Machines. Shepard, Commander opposes the Heretics. Cooperation furthers mutual goals."

The metal plates on top of it's 'head' lifted in a way that suggested expression. Shepard wondered if it was meant to be the geth version of a brow lift.

"Are you asking to join us?"

"Yes."

Shepard needed little else to convince her that having a geth on their side would be an advantage. She wondered how far off the deep end Tali was going to flip when she found out. Shepard used her omni-tool to lower the field.

"Then what should I call you?"

"Geth."

"I mean _you_, specifically." She tried not to sound to irritated with it's narrow view of her question.

"We are all geth."

"What is the individual in front of me called?" She said each word clearly and precisely and crossed her arms with agitation.

"There is no individual. We are geth. There are currently 1,183 programs active within this platform."

"My name is Legion, for we are many." EDI's holo image appeared next to her.

"That seems appropriate..."

The geth's facial plates twitched as it accessed relating information.

"Christian Bible, the gospel of Mark, chapter five, verse nine. We acknowledge this is an appropriate metaphor. We are Legion, a terminal of the geth. We will integrate into Normandy."

Shepard offered her hand. The geth mimicked her gesture, but did not take her hand. It did not seem to understand the concept. Shepard took it's hand and shook it, smirking a little at it's almost child like interpretation of things.

"We anticipate the exchange of data." said Legion.

Shepard nodded and left. She would continue to ask it questions later. Right now she needed to talk to something organic. Or nothing at all.

* * *

Sonya's limbs moved pains-takingly slow through the air. Each position, each sweep of an arm or a leg had meaning and purpose. These practiced movements had saved her life countless times in closer than comfortable combat. The small holo image that sat on top of the cryo-coffin cast a blue toned light on the surfaces surrounding it. It nodded a few times as it went through the motions of smiling and chuckling the way he had done on occasion. She missed him sorely. Half way through the ritual she started talking to the holo as if it were Nihlus standing there critiquing her progress instead of another machine.

"Have you ever tried having a conversation with you're console?" She asked, glancing at the holo. "Because that's what it's like talkin' with that geth, only worse." She paused between sentences to breath. "Garrus seems to think we should have left it. I think it will be a valuable asset. I mean, it's a talkin' geth! You don't see many of those. And it wants to fight the Reapers. The enemy of my enemy is my friend, right?" She panted.

"Thane agrees with me. You never met him. He's a drell we picked up. Good guy."

Thinking about Thane instantly moistened her panties. It also reminded her that she owed Nihlus an apology. She stopped in her slow dance of combat techniques and self centering motions to kneel by the coffin. She placed a hand on it's cold surface next to the silently laughing holo. Focusing on the bright image she sighed heavily.

"There's something I have to tell you. I had no right to be angry at you for what you did. Apparently I'm not much different. Thane and I ... something happened. Don't blame him. It wasn't really his fault. I'm so sorry. Do you forgive me?"

She waited a few seconds and the holo nodded. She grinned.

"I knew you would." She kissed the curve of the coffin as the top became the side. "I love you. I miss you so much. I'm going to do what I can to get TIM to bring you back. You didn't deserve better than this."

The tears rolled silently and easily down her cheeks. It was almost like breathing to shed them. She thought to tell him about the pregnancy scare. That drell physiology might have been compatible with human, but the test Mordin ran were all negative. He had dubbed it a 'near impossibility'. Drell were so rare, no studies existed of compatability with other species besides asari. Mordin seemed to think there was an exceptionally miniscule chance and advised her against too much worry over the subject. In the light of that information she elected not to vex her mate over it.

"Garrus yelled at me plenty. But don't worry, he's keeping me safe. Providing plenty of cover fire and self sacrifice." She teased the silver metal box with the Cerberus emblem on the top. "I know you're spirit has left this body, and there's no point to my talking to it. But it makes me feel better. Wherever you are, I hope it's nice there. Warm and breezy like you like. Maybe it's like Palavan. You finally made it home. I hold the pillows at night and try to imagine they're you. I know it sounds silly, and it doesn't work that well. You were never really cuddly." She grinned. "I kinda like the pillows better, come to think of it."

She shook her head. "I'm teasing a refridgirator. What's wrong with me?"

"Nothing."

The reverberating voice that intruded on her privacy echoed to her from the door way. Her head spun in the direction of the source for the long shadow that stretched over the floor. Garrus stood in the door way in his best civies.

"I came to pay my respects. I wasn't sure if you'd be here. I'll come back."

He turned to leave, but she called out to him.

"Stay... Please?"

He glanced back at her. The stress was plain on her face. The usual light pink of her cheeks was gone, the light in her eyes was the reflection of the water there. He wished there was more he could do for her. Turian women didn't react as strongly to the death of a mate. A week and they moved on. Humans were much more emotional. He wondered how something so small and fragile could contain such powerful forces. He walked over and sat beside her.

"I was just telling him about the geth, Legion." She told him.

"We're naming it?" Garrus asked with a raised brow plate.

"Well, EDI named him." Sonya shrugged.

"That's creepy." Garrus shook his head.

"I'm glad you're my friend." She said suddenly.

Garrus' mandibles flashed a nervous grin.

"I'm glad you feel that way." He teased her. He was rewarded for his efforts with a smile.

"EDI says the IFF is ready to be installed and Legion wants to speak with you." He told her.

"Okay. Thanks." She nodded and turned to the holo, switching it off.

"I think I'm okay now." She said, turning back to him. "I guess I needed to be yelled at."

She grinned up at him. His eyes looked down at her almost the way Nihlus' used to. She thought about what Thane had told her about Van Gogh. She didn't over think the notion. She gave Garrus a quick peck then left the room as quickly as she could. In the elevator she leaned against the wall. She had _felt_ something when she had kissed him! She hadn't expected to. She wasn't even thinking like that. But there was a spark there! No, no no... she couldn't do that. Not again. No. He was like a brother to her. And if Cerberus could bring Nihlus back...

"Keep it together, Shepard." She told herself. "Save the galaxy, then worry about what kind of scales are in your bed."


	55. Kodiak

'Heretic' station. It had been a while since she had gotten to have such guilt free fun. They got to blow up a tons of geth and 'make new 'friends'. Shepard had decided to rewrite them. It was the only course of action that did not leave any geth out of the loop. She would much rather have them as friends than take the chance that the few left would rebuild and return with a vengeance. Garrus and Thane agreed to some extent, though Thane found it a form of brainwashing. They had been brainwashed already. Doing so again to save trillions of lives was preferable to the alternative. The team crammed themselves into the shuttle. They were headed back to Omega. TIM had found a possible replacement for Samara. An asari called Morinth. The Normandy would remain in orbit outside the astroid belt until their return. EDI would be making the final preparations for the IFF.

Omega hadn't gotten any better. In fact Aria had sent them another greeting via Moklan ordering Shepard to report or she would impound the shuttle. Shepard crossed her arms and purposefully glared at the wrong set of eyes, just to piss him off.

"How convenient. I needed to see her anyway." Shepard said with a smirk and pushed passed him, her army following close behind. The bad thing about commanding an army, they all had something to say.

"Battlemaster, this place smells like a shit hole."

"It _is_ a shit hole, Grunt." Garrus replied.

"_You_ are not the battlemaster!" Grunt pointed a finger in the turians' face.

Garrus was quick to butt the barrel of his gun against the krogan's neck. Shepard jumped between them.

"Okay, we're all on edge. Being crammed together in the shuttle has rubbed everyone a little raw. Let's just spread out and calm down. Tali, you take the credit chit and buy anything we need. Take Legi... take Garrus with you." Shepard changed her mind feeling the quarians' glare through the mask. "Mordin go with Miranda, Jacob and Grunt. See what you can get from the locals. I don't want to 'owe' the queen any favors. Legion and Thane will come with me, we'll go visit her _highness_."

The music in Afterlife was extremely loud. Maybe she was too used to the quiet of the Normandy. She passed the bar and remembered she had yet to deliver that stupid bottle or brandy to the doctor. The thought that the doctor probably felt she'd given a empty promise, coupled with everything else prompted her to stop for a drink herself. But she resisted the urge with some subtle insistence from Thane as he blocked her path to the bar by 'unintentionally' getting in her way. After a few tries and a stern look from her friends black eyes, she relented and scaled the stairs to the throne room.

Aria had insisted on scanning her to make sure she was who she said she was, at least genetically. When the god head of Omega turned to face the defiant commander her lovely face was marred by hate, greed, and deception. It glared out from the window of her soul. Most could not see past the shroud that covered them with an insincere kindness, but Shepard saw past it to the sharp viciousness that had put in into power. She took a seat when offered one as far as possible from Aria and her personal guard.

"So, what brings a dead Spectre, a friendly geth and a pet drell to Omega? And where's you're counter part? Aren't you a member of the SDA? Or has he moved on to greener pastures?"

Aria had meant to insinuate that he'd found a turian or asari mate, but Shepard's mind turned to the turian faith in the After, loosely translated. Indeed, he had moved on to greener pastures. Aria's words were needles in her heart, but she did not give the asari the satisfaction of seeing her pain.

"Spectre Kryik is on a separate mission." She answered coolly. "I'm here looking for someone. An asari. Morinth."

Aria smirked at her and narrowed her eyes. "I can't be _bothered_ to keep track of _every _asari that goes in and out of Omega. Dancers pulse in and out of _Afterlife alone_ in the hundreds. You can't expect me to know _all_ their names."

"I have a feeling you know _this_ one. Nothing goes on here that you don't know about." Shepard replied. She knew this game.

"Maybe I do, maybe I don't. What are you offering to make it worth my while?"

"Not a damn thing. Thank you for your time. But my team and I will find her on our own. Good-bye."

Shepard got up to leave. She didn't have time for this crap. Thane and Legion flanked her as she descended the stairs. When they had exited Afterlife, Thane moved to her side. He knew Omega well enough to know one didn't want to be there.

"How shall we proceed?" He asked her in a low tone, keeping an ever watchful eye on their surroundings.

"We check out the VIP section. If Aria knows who Morinth is, then she's either important or dangerous. In Aria's book that makes her an asset and Aria's assets get perks. Let's go."

He followed with a subtle grin on his face. Even in her armor he could make out the curves of her body when it swayed as she walked. He held hope that one day he would be allowed the privilege of gliding his hands down those curves once again. He wasn't the only one to notice either. Nearly every male they passed gave her at least a once over. It gave him a sense of pride that she had chosen him, but it also put his guard up, and not just in defense of her. There three reasons glances like that were given and all of them were related to lust. Desire, greed and covetous. His attention was drawn to Shepard's arm when her omni-tool beeped with an urgent message alarm. She activated it and read the words that scrolled across the orange glow. She turned sharply to him, her eyes wider than usual with a hint of panic.

"We have to get back to the Normandy, now."

The cold urgency in her voice told him something was terribly wrong. He activated his own omni-tool and sent out a brief message to all team members.

"Kodiak."

He was not disappointed when most of the team was already there or arriving when he, Legion and Shepard rounded the corner to the docking bay.

"What's going on, Shepard? Where's Mor..."

"The Collectors found the Normandy. They took the crew." Shepard interrupted Garrus' questions with the short answer.

He stood in stunned silence for a few seconds as she passed by him. Thane watched as the turians face viably steeled as the information and his rage settled in.

"Those bastards are going to pay."


	56. Captain's Cabin

Thane stood behind her an a little to the side. Everyone was squished in the Kodiak as it was, making it easy for her to grab his hand without anyone noticing. It surprised him, but he held his posture and face in a somber manner. He smiled internally because she had turned to him for support instead of turning to the turian on the other side of her. He squeezed her hand back and held it until the shuttle docked inside the hanger.

Shepard left him in the shuttle with Miranda and Jacob hot on her heels. The hesitated when she veered off the path to the elevator to check on the cryo-pod. She released the breath she'd been holding when it was still there and in tact.

Shepard, Jacob and Joker were waiting for Miranda in the com room. She had gone strait to her office to insure the security of Cerberus files. Joker was sitting on the oblong console. Jacob was pacing the doors hissed open and Miranda barged in as if she would tear through something.

"_Everyone_? You _lost everyone_ and nearly lost the _ship too_?" She shouted at Joker.

"I know, alright. I was here." Joker replied, feeling dejected.

"It's not his fault, Miranda. None of us caught it." Jacob defended Joker. EDI biped to life behind Joker.

"Mr. Taylor is correct. The harmful data in the Collector drive was even more sophisticated than the Black Box Reaper viruses I was given."

"Joker, are you okay?" Shepard asked.

"There's a lot of empty chairs out there, Commander." He replied with heavy shoulders.

"Is the ship operational?"

"The Reaper IFF is clean and online. With EDI hooked in we can go through the Omega-4 Relay any time we want."

"Don't even get me started about un-shackling the damned AI." Miranda glowered at Joker, her arms crossed.

"Well, what can I do against Collectors? Break my arm at them?" Joker narrowed his eyes at her. "EDI cleared the ship. She's alright."

"I assure you, I am still bound by protocalls in my programming. Even if I were not, you are my crew mates." EDI piped in.

"Thank you EDI." Shepard nodded to the AI and EDI sighed out.

"I vote we rescue the crew." Jacob was practically seething .

"Well, we've done all we can do. There's nothing holding us back now. We could always go back to Omega and collect Morinth." Miranda suggested.

"No. We need to get our people back." Shepard said, narrowing her eyes.

"Just hit up the galaxy map whenever you're ready, Commander." Joker said and eased himself off the table to hobbled away.

Everyone left the room leaving Shepard alone. The weight of what they were rushing in to face, everything that had happened with her team, between her and Thane... Garrus, Nihlus' death... Anxiety gripped her and tightened her in her chest. For a few seconds she couldn't breath as she stood gripping the ledge of the table. How could any one person be expected to do so much? She vacated the office as quickly as she could, blinking back the tears. She kept her calm long enough to enter the command to head into the Omega-4 Relay. ETA was two hours. She acknowledged and fled to the elevator, though there was no one to see her tears.

"Pull yourself together, solder!" She commanded herself as she entered her quarters.

She leaned over the desk, letting the tears fall to the smooth surface. The doors hissed quietly behind her. Something gently touched her back. She jumped and turned to face the intruder. It was Thane. His brow was knitted in concern. He opened his arms to her and she fell into them, silent tears streaming down her face. He rested his lips on her forehead and tenderly stroked her back. He didn't speak. He just held her, and hummed a low soothing purr. It comforted her. It reminded her of Nihlus. She missed him.

"Thane." she breathed his name.

His arms tightened around her, holding her too him as if he needed to have her near him. His face had a seriousness about it, stern. He spoke her name,

"Siha, I..." His sternness softened as the sound left his lips.

Thane kept his arms securely around her. It comforted him as much as it did her.

"I have known I would die for many years." He began the impromptu he'd planed on the elevator ride up. "I've tried to leave the galaxy better than I found it. You've helped me archive more than I thought possible."

He found her eyes with his and looked deeply into her.

"We've righted many wrongs. I've spoken to my son." He paused, then sighed heavily. "I should be at _peace_ on the eve of battle."

His brow suddenly knitted with his disappointment in himself. The corners of his mouth turned down, his features once again stern, almost angry. Her delicate fingers slid up his chest to rest over his pout.

"Stop, Don't give me a speech." She spoke firmly, but with a softness she rarely showed.

His eyes lost their hardness. He shook his head and looked at the floor before he gazed into her face once more.

"I'm ashamed." He admitted.

His features changed to sorrow and worry as his brow furrowed. He was being more honest with her than he'd been with anyone since Irikah's death. Shepard reached up to caress his face. She had barely touched him when he inhaled sharply, resisting. He wasn't sure if this was the point he should release her. He had a feeling it was long passed that point. The light from the tanks caught on the ring of his irises, making them shine like silver. His expression changed to a less confident Thane, a more vulnerable one. Thane remembered of all his evil deeds, the losses he'd suffered, the impending doom they were running to... of Irikah and Kolyat and even the woman in his arms who was torn between her love for him and the sorrow for her lost mate. A tear ran down his cheek and it angered him. A sneer marred his face as he released her and turned away. His fist curled into hard balls and he punched the wall as hard as he could. He continued to push, as if he could break through the steel. Pain shot up his arm from the impact, but he ignored it. He looked over his shoulder at Shepard. She could see the wetness on his face, her own stained her cheeks. A heavy knot formed in her gut. Her heart ached for a way to comfort him as he had comforted her.

"I've worked so hard. Meditated and prayed and done good deeds. Atoned for the evils I've done. Prepared." Thane told her as he shook his head.

His fist had started slipping under the presser he kept on it. "I consider my bodies death, and a chill settles in my gut."

Sonya had walked silently up behind him and tenderly eased her hand over his fist, the other onto his back. He turn his face to hers.

"I am _afraid_ and it _shames_ me."

He turned his body to hers. Sonya slipped her hand from his back to his cheek. His head is lowered, his eyes wet with tears. His face echoes her serenity.

"Thane," She whispers.

He looked into her eyes. They were dark, but the storm had passed, now they were gentle and only for him. Her soft hand was warm on his cheek. The scent of her musk was a sweetness in the air.

"Be alive with me tonight."

She breathed the words to him and his brow furrowed. He didn't want to love her simply for comfort, but it may be the last time they have a moment before they return to the sea. He could not be what Nihlus was to her, but he could be what _he_ was to her.

Her lips found his and his mouth willingly accepted her tongue. He left his eyes partially open to watch her kiss him, memorizing the open emotions expressed there. Then he closed his eyes and returned the kiss. At first he hesitated, though her mouth was already against his. He worried about the aftermath of traveling down this path again. Although Garrus had encouraged him to go to her and stood guard at the door, he was still unsure. His love for her was strong. He would have waited until he drew his last struggling breath for her. But she needed him now. So, with a hungry passion, he returned her desperation.

Tears glistened in the soft blue light of the empty tanks. The water reminded him a Kahje and he told her so. She grinned up at him. Their clothes were in a pile at the foot of the stairs, their only fashion was whatever marks adorned their skin. Though Thane still wore the curious circlet about his neck. She didn't ask him about it. His son had worn one as well. She only concerned herself with the feel of the tiny scales that covered his avocado body and the speckles and stripes of black. Her lips teased the red, swollen folds of his throat and relished the purr that came from deep within him. If they survived the final mission, she would love him until the end. He deserved to be loved. Her own pain was irrelevant. She found his mouth and the sweet, slippery tongue within that eagerly accepted hers. When she once again opened her eyes, her drell lover seemed to be surrounded by a blue halo of light that prismed deeper mono toned hues of violet and indigo. She slipped his slick hardness into her waiting wetness. His moans joined hers as she enjoyed the feel of him filling and stretching her. The ridges of him rubbed her in all the best places in the most exciting ways. She moved over him like water as he rolled his hips. His exotic body rippled beneath her, visually drawing her in with intoxicating arousal. His eyes were her aphrodisiac, his lips were her need and his rod was her lust that throbbed deep inside her in rhythm with his quickened heart rate. How like a cobra he danced for her as his colors amplified and seemed to glow of their own luminescence.

Orgasm after orgasm crashed over her as she rode him to his completion. His nimble fingers traced over the dips in her muscle tone and rested on her curvacious hips. He kept his eyes on her as much as possible, closing them only when he moaned. His arms were his love for her as he wrapped them around her and rolled her under him. His lips kissed her with passionate fervor. His slow, rhythmic thrusts filled her with his wonton sex. She arched her back as he probed deeper into her, leaving a little of himself inside her with each shuddering pulse. The sound of their joining echoed off the walls with their pants and groans. His purrs rumbled through her like an earth quake. His love making was generous as it was greedy. She gave and took just as willingly. Her eyes roamed over him, admiring his beautiful eroticism. His hands admired hers as he gently messaged and caressed the swells of her breasts. His tongue flicked at the pink harness the responded readily to his touch. He grinned when she moaned and writhed under him.

"Siha..." He breathed the name against her neck as he climaxed inside her, shuddering.

Her body quivered beneath him as he filled her. Her own release built in her like the tidal wave builds into a tsunami. Her nevers tingled and she dug her fingers into the skin of his back. As she moaned his name, her own rush of fluids thoroughly moistened him from his navel to his knees. He continued to thrust into her until he grew soft as he kissed her and ran his fingers through her hair. Slowly he settled beside her, gazing into her eyes and sweetly grinning face.

"I want you to know... before we go into... whatever waits for us on the other side," Sonya began. She paused to lick her lips. "I love you, Thane."

"Siha,"

He spoke softly as he stroked her face. He would tell her she only felt the lingering after glow of the hallucinations and the sex, but he couldn't find it in his heart to do it. And he couldn't deny that he cherished the words on her lips. Perhaps one day they would be true.

"I love you also." He told her and sealed the sentiment with a kiss.

"ETA 30 minutes, Shepard." EDI briefly interrupted.

"I guess we should get ready." She said.

"Agreed."

They both regretted the circumstance, but not the growing feelings between them. His only lament was that he could not fall asleep with her in his arms one last time. He would join her in the shower, but he dared not aggravate his condition before such an demanding mission. Perhaps if they returned... _when_ they returned.


	57. Collector Base

Shepard slammed into the barrier narrowly avoiding the onslaught of attacks aimed at her, scooping up the spare ammo along the skidding slide. She loaded the rounds into her rifle. Her shields were down, but there were only two more tubes and that thing was going down hard. She rolled into position.

"Okay, cover me boys." She ordered into her com.

She took aim. Bam! The glass shattered and the liquid gore that feed life into the abomination of organic and synthetic. The armored covers started dropping. Only one tube left. She took aim,blam! More glass and gore rained down to the abyss below as enemy fire grazed her cheek. The Reaper sagged, the weight of it pulling on the support tubes. They snapped and the Reaper fell into the pit. She could almost hear it screaming. The station shuttered nearly throwing her boys to the ground. Shepard quickly regained her ballance first, having started on the floor, and tapped her com. She barely noticed the thin line of blood trickling down her cheek.

"Miranda, give me a status report."

"Jack here. We're taggin' 'em as they come, Shepard. Feel free to call for an exit_ any_ time!"

"Head to the Normandy." Shepard ordered, then switched to the ship's frequency. "Joker, prep the engines. I'm about to over load this hell hole and blow it sky high."

"Roger that, Commander." Joker answered.

Shepard ran for the core ready to sent the Collector base into the nearest destructive anomaly. Working fast, she opened the core and pulled it up out of the platform. She was prepping it for the detonation disk when Vakarian's omni-tool beeped. It was Joker.

"Uh, Commander? I've got an incoming message from the Illusive Man. EDI's patching it through."

Garrus stood by Shepard so she could see without stopping her work. He activated the message and a hollo of the Illusive Man appeared.

"Shepard, you've done the impossible." He praised her.

"_We_ are not finished here yet, This base is ten minutes from extinction." She replied.

It angered her that he treated her like a child or a pet. Even more that he gave her all the credit when other's had died for the success of the mission.

"That may not be necessary. I'm looking at the schematics EDI up loaded. A timed radiation pulse would wipe out the remaining Collectors leaving the technology in tack."

"Our mission was to destroy the base." Shepard reminded him, not stopping what she was doing.

"The Collectors were building a Reaper. That knowledge, that framework could save us. Our best chance is to turn their own resources against them. Who knows what information is buried here?"

"You'd better talk fast. I'm almost done." She warned.

"We've won a single victory, but we're still at war. This is a gift, we can't just destroy it. Think of the potential. I brought you back so you could keep fighting for what you believed in. To keep fighting for humanity. My goal is to preserve humanity, at any cost. I've never hidden that from you. Think of the lives we could save if we do, and the lives that will be lost if we don't."

"Siha," Thane interrupted, "We must be careful not to become what we seek to destroy."

"What dose this alien know?" The Illusive Man gestured angrily at Thane. "Humanity is what's at steak! Don't throw this opportunity away!"

Shepard slowly stood and faced the hollo. She could see Garrus' face through the image. If she turned her head just right the colors lined up to make in look similar to Nihlus. Then she focused back on TIM, narrowing her eyes at him.

"_If_ I keep the base for you... what will you do for me?"

"I brought you back from the dead! What more do you want?"

"Yeah, you spent trillions and two years to put my carcass back together and re-animate my ass. I get it." Shepard crossed her arms, "But then you sent me galavanting across the galaxy with no recoop time and one of your damn dossiers killed Nihlus."

The Illusive Man's eyes relaxed as he began to understand where she was headed. She didn't like letting him into any part of her personal life, but it might be the only chance she had to ever see Nihlus alive again. She would rather have stayed dead than live the rest of her life without him.

"What do you want me to do, Shepard? Bring back the turian? He's not of the same importance _you_ are. Why should I spend the time a resources to bring him back?"

"Because if you don't I'm gonna blow your precious base to tiny tiny pieces, ass wad."

"Crass behavior will not help you."

"Fine. What do _you_ want? The base and what? _Me_ for how ever long this _drags_ on?"

"You're goal and mine are the same, to stop the Reapers. The Council isn't going to listen to you until worlds start vanishing. I'm the only one who is backing you."

"You want Kryik alive and on your team. I can't do it without him." Shepard said, and crossed her arms.

"Can't or won't." The Illusive Man growled.

She didn't answer. Either answer was acceptable.

"I can see you won't be dissuaded. Very well. I'll have a ship escort you to a capable station once you clear the Omega-4 Relay. We'll begin as soon as you arrive."

"Shepard, if you do this the Council will revoke your Spectre status." Garrus advised.

"Siha?" Thane asked.

His brow plates were furrowed. He was trying not to feel hurt, but he was. Shepard looked at him. He could see the battle within her. His heart went out to her, but did she not care for him or her duty more than a chance that TIM would keep his word?

"Thane, I'm sorry." She said softy, searching his face. "If you had the opportunity to spend even one more day with Irikah, wouldn't you take it?"

Thane didn't even have to think about the answer. He didn't have to say it either. She already knew what his response would be. Of course he would. He could not hold her decision against her. Not when he would do the same. He knew she cared for him, but her heart belonged to Nihlus first. As much as it hurt his pride, it was the way it should be. It would take time to bring Nihlus back. He himself would likely have returned to the sea by then. He couldn't expect her to not look beyond the end of his life for any happiness to be found. He nodded to her, briefly closing his eyes. Her gaze lingered on him a moment longer, as if trying to tell him so many things at once. Then she returned her attention to the Illusive Man.

"I will rig the core to sent out the pulse." She told TIM, then she leaned into the holo with a fierce expression. "You'd better come through with Kryik. If he doesn't survive, you won't either."

"Shepard, I give you my word I will do everything in my power to ensure that we bring him back."

The holo fizzled out and Garrus deactivated the omni-tool display. He went to hand Shepard the disk that would have destroyed the base, now it would only destroy the Collectors, but a smooth green hand stopped him. Thane held out his hand for the disk, his resolve steeled in his eyes. Garrus looked into the strange, large orbs, seeing what Shepard must see in him. He nodded and relinquished the disk. Thane took it and offer a half nod as a kind of thanks then walked over to Shepard. She was surprised to see the green fingers holding the disk and she looked up into her hard face as she took the disk from him. She wanted to say something, but what could she say? Thanks? I love you? I wish we could bring back Irikah for you? Nothing would have made it easier, so she said nothing. She worked quickly to rearrange the transparent green and orange disks to create the pulse instead of explode. Pushing the core back into the platform, she rose to her feet.

"OK, we've got ten minutes before his place starts glowing. Let's get out of here."

She moved toward the platform that brought them in to meet the Normandy at the pick up point when the floor beneath her shuddered violently.

"We've got company!" Shouted Garrus.

More Collectors were flying in and the Reaper had climbed up out of the pit, 'alive' and angry. Shepard sought out higher ground and took cover. Thane was at her back throwing the incoming Collectors over the edge of the platforms as they landed or blasting them with a warp blast. His body was an inferno of blue flame. Garrus was one platform down, taking out Collectors with deadly precision, finding his mark at the end of the scope and firing in rapid succession. Shepard sent a storm of bullets at the Reaper, hoping to hit a weak spot, while Garrus and provided cover fire. A stray hit one of the eye sockets, igniting a spark.

"Okay, that's it. Just like organics, aim for the head." She thought.

She took aim with her assault rifle. The Reaper was moving and dodging as it slapped away platforms. Some kind of weapon was building power in it's mouth. She had to take it down before it had a chance to fire.

"Hold on, boys. It's about to get hot!" Shepard shouted over the com.

Un-clipping Cain from her back she pulled the trigger for the warm-up sequence. It would take a few seconds for the charge to build before it would fire. She hoped it worked as well on this new Reaper as it had on the derelict Reaper core.

Shepard looked to Garrus as he sniped a Collector. He found her gaze. His face was stern in the heat of battle as was her own. He noted her finger on the trigger. She would pop up out of cover just before it fired. Garrus put his back to the barrier wall he took shelter behind and nodded. Then she turned her gaze to Thane beside her. He fired of a couple shots, them met her dark, stern eyes with his own. He dropped and pushed his back to the wall. Cain started to glow as it sung the song of promised destruction. The explosion could wipe out everything in the chamber, not just the Reaper. Thane leaned in, releasing one hand from his rifle to cup her cheek and kiss her. It was brief, but not lacking in heat or tenderness. The light on the small display turned yellow. Time was up.

Shepard moved like lightning, taking aim at the eye of the Reaper that held two glowing cannons. Cain fired, the recoil threatened to knock her back, but she pushed against the force with all her might and gritted teeth. She was temporarily blinded by the resulting explosion. When her eyes adjusted the cavern was alight in a brilliant, fiery glow. The tubes and roof were burning. Debris was flying through the air. The body of the Reaper tottered and fell forward onto the platforms, sending them in every direction like a ball landing in a pile of poker chips.

Shepard's platform tipped forward until it was almost vertical. She grabbed the ledge as it tipped. Garrus and Thane had hold of the ledge to either side of her. The platform shuttered and Thane's grip slipped. Thane was sliding to his death, frantically trying to find a finger hold and failing. Shepard let go of the edge of the platform without hesitation. No one else was going to die. Not today. The sound of her armor skidding across the floor vibrating in her head. Garrus' voice screamed his protests after her. Thane's arm was out stretched, reaching for her. He used his feet and other arm to try and find some purchase to slow his descent.

Thane's mind burned with panic. Sonya had thrown herself after him. All he could think of was reaching her, of grabbing hold of her outstretched hand as if Arashu would intervene and stop them both from plummeting to their deaths. She caught up close enough to grab his hand, but their fingers grazed passed each other. Terror flashed over his features. His face was despair as he felt his feet go over the edge. He lost sight of Shepard. In the seconds of weightlessness his thoughts returned to Irikah. He would see her again soon. Suddenly he felt a hand securely grip his and his body halted to a stop as the platform regained some balance. Shepard helped him climb over the edge. He was barely on his feet when she was thrust against him when the platform lurched in the opposite direction, sending them rolling toward the other end. Garrus slid down the slope on his feet, determined to run up the side and avoid falling to his death. The platform regained balance once more just as falling debris smashed into it from above. The platform spun wildly, crashing into other platforms. A chunk of flooring crushed Shepard to the ground. Black.

Shepard woke aching and unable to gain a full lung of air. Something large and heavy pinned her to the ground. What had happened? Where was Garrus? Where was... Thane! She had to get up. It took all her strength to lift the flooring and move out from under it. Her eyes focused on a body a few feet to her right. It was Garrus. She ran to him and turned him over. His eyes blinked. Blue blood trickled down the side of his face. One arm hung off the edge of the platform, the fingers were mangled, probably broken. But he was alive and conscious. She helped him to his feet.

"Are you okay?" She asked.

"Ya, ya... " He nodded. "I'm okay." He tried to flex his twisted hand. "Augh! Damn it!"

Shepard tapped him on the shoulder and turned to looked around again. Debris on the other side of the platform. There was a body under it. She ran over and hoisted the flooring off the form. It was the drell. He wasn't breathing. She lift his body into her arms. His head rolled into her elbow. His eyes were closed, a pinkish blood stain ran from his nose.

"Thane!"

No response. Garrus hobbled over to her and placed a hand on her shoulder.

"We've got to go, Commander. This is gonna be a bad place to be in a few minutes. He wouldn't want you to be here when that happens." He told her sympathetically, but with urgency.

He couldn't help but feel for her. It was the second lover she'd lost in the last six months. Sonya wrapped both arms around Thane's body. It was still warm. She put an ear to his chest. Very faintly she could hear his heart beat.

"He's still alive! Help me stand him up." She ordered.

Garrus took the opposite arm and helped Shepard hoist him up. His body took in a sharp breath. His eyes fluttered open, the light making the edges of his pupils shine silver. He looked at her.

"Siha..." he breathed her name.

"We've go to get out of here. Now." She said, and secured his arm over her shoulders.

A few hurried, awkward steps latter he regained his feet and they started running. Garrus was faster and ran ahead of them. Shepard ran beside Thane in case he stumbled. Then a sound like humming could be heard behind them. She and Thane paused to glance back at the source, hoping it wasn't the Reaper somehow returning to plague them. The dark swirling cloud that wasn't smoke buzzed and moved toward them at an alarming speed.

"Seekers!" She shouted.

Thane picked up his pace. He was faster than he looked. Even on the Citadel running after Kolyat he had not gone so quickly. A head of them Garrus neared the edge of a great cliff. The Normandy pulled up along side the ledge as close as the pilot dared to put her. The docking hatch opened with Joker inside. He fired several rounds from a submachine gun into the Collectors hot on Shepard's tail.

Harbinger boomed treats and ominous warnings. But she wasn't listening. She watched as Garrus jumped the gap to the ship. Moments latter Thane made the jump, landing firmly on his feet. The incline was steepening. She pushed herself as hard as her body could tolerate. A large chunk of the station fell from the ceiling, crashing into the cliff edge knocking it away. The gap was not three times he size and the Normandy couldn't risk getting closer. Joker, Garrus and Thane fired shots over her head into the Collectors. Thane muttered a prayer with each bullet for Shepard's life.

Shepard pushed herself up to the jagged edge and jumped. Her body glided through the air, arms spinning. She wasn't thinking about not making the jump. She was only thinking that she would see Nihlus again. As her line of sight fell below the floor of the Normandy her hands clamped onto the ledge. She tried to pull herself up, but she was too weak. Her salvation came when a firm grip on her wrist pulled her into the ship. Her eyes met not one set of eyes but two. Her boys hoisted her to her feet.

"EDI, get us outta here!" Joker shouted.

The door closed and the ship turned away from the Collector base as the radiation pulse destroyed everything organic within. Joker ran to the cockpit. Shepard followed with Garrus and Thane in tow as the ship picked up speed. The Normandy's engines screamed as they were pushed to their limits. She shook her crew as she dodged space debris trying to out run the shock wave following her. Heat seared her barriers and scorched her shields. Her mass effect FTL drive activated. Her crew was safe.


	58. Shadow

The Normandy docked at the station that orbited the world. There the ship would be repaired while the cryo-pod was taken down to the surface by shuttle. Miranda sat opposite her while Garrus sat on one side of her and Thane sat on the other. Thane felt it was his duty as her lover and her friend to be by her side. Miranda would again head the project. The Cerberus base was built into the side of a mountain of a planet Shepard could not find on a map. She wondered how an entire planet could be kept hidden. As Nihlus' body was taken beyond the point she could follow, she grabbed Miranda's hand. The operative looked at her with kind and reassuring eyes.

"It will be okay, Commander." Miranda told her. "I won't let anything happen to him."

"Thank you." Shepard replied

She released the woman's hand, the hand of someone she hoped she could trust and call friend. Then took the hand of one someone she called lover. The coolness of his scales and the heat of his skin radiating though was a collage of sensations she'd come to find great comfort in.

"He's in good hands, Shepard." Garrus told her.

He didn' believe it, but it might make her feel better. Movement on the edge of his vision caught his eye as a human male in a white tunic style uniform approached them. When he spoke he had a subtle East Indian accent.

"Greetings. I am Aagam. Cerberus has instructed me to welcome you to our humble base. If you will follow me, I will show you to the rooms where you and your crew will be staying until repairs are complete."

"You mean we won't be assisting in repairs?" Garrus asked.

"You will need some place to sleep, yes? The teams will be shuttled daily to assist in repairs. Do not worry. Come, this way please."

Aagam summoned them with a 'come hither' motion of his first four fingers of one hand. Shepard glanced at Garrus then Thane as they followed.

* * *

It only took a week for repairs to be completed. I took much longer for repairs to Nihlus. With no physical damage, the enigma of his death was a difficult hurtle to jump in order to resurrect him. In that time, being cast out from the Citadel and the Alliance, Shepard and her team scoured the galaxy for any way to stop the Reapers. Any mercenaries, pirates or other vagabond that interfered with them paid dearly for their mistake.

One evening Thane came to her quarters. Most nights he stayed with her, but more and more he sought the easier air of Life Support. His time was running short. It would not be long now. Shepard had bargained with the Illusive Man to also research a cure for his condition. Something he appreciated, but didn't entirely understand. If he was cured and Nihlus was returned to life, a difficult choice would be set before her. He could not think of a reason she would put herself in such a position. Surely she would not prolong his life to turn away from him. Over the months she had assured him with more than words that her love was true and not a desperate need for comfort. He could see it in her eyes, in the way she always came to his aid before others in battle, the looks she believed he did not see. Even her body language had changed when she was near him. Though the stress of being on the run from the Council and former fellow Spectres for the past seven months was wearing on her. Anderson managed to smuggled encrypted messages to her on occasion. He didn't agree with everything she did, but he was a father of sorts to her and he would always love her in that way.

The doors hissed open and he found her laying across the sofa staring at the silver orb that hovered over the low table. He sat with his back to the adjoining sofa on the floor by her head. One of her hands crept over the cushion to rest on his knee. He grinned. The room remained in a comfortable silence for some time before her quiet words broke the stillness.

"Thane?"

"Yes, Siha. Here I am." He said and slipped a hand over hers.

"Do you want to be brought back if they find a cure?" She asked without taking her eyes from the sphere.

"No."

His answer came softly, but firm and without hesitation. Her eyes turned up to him then, a stark contrast of black on cream. Her coral lips were a pale line just below her shadowless nose.

"Why not?"

"Siha, I have lived my life. Many years have been taken from me by my condition, but I have prepared long for the eventuality of my death. Kolyat knows his father loves him and I may yet see him again before the end. But when I cross the veil that separates this world from what waits for us beyond, I do not believe I will wish to leave it. If I do return to life in a mortal coil, it will not be this body. Do you understand?"

Sonya was quiet for many moments before she shook her head slightly.

"No." She murmured. "But I respect your decision." She paused then asked, "Do you think you will find her there? That you'll be together again?"

Thane smiled at her. Through her meditations that he had taught her, the pain she suffered had made her sensitive to the hearts of others instead of hard and bitter. It was a beauty he found in her that he found in no other, save one.

"I pray I will be blessed with such a gift." He answered.

Sonya slid over the cushion to him and took his chin in her hands, bringing her lips to his in a tender kiss.

"I love you." She whispered.

He took her hand in his.

"I know."

He put her hand to his heart. Returning the sentiment without words as he kissed her, gently rolling his tongue over hers. Her breath became heavy as his own came with greater tensity. Whenever their mouths met it seemed to spark arousal. It was remarkable, and in a way he lamented it. A part of him greatly desired for things to be different than they were, but he could not change what was. Moments later they lay together on the sofa. She accepted him in every respect as he accepted his fate.


	59. Kahje

Shepard fulfilled her promise, though it came late in coming. The dessert of Intai'sei was now how she imagined it, but it suited his heart fine. The few days they spent there were spent well. He watched the sun rise and the sun set with her for nearly a week. By night they lay under the stars and watched the Normandy float by in her orbit. His love making was more vital in the dry cool air of the dessert night. He was able to show her a side to himself that was vigorous and passionate. In the cooler hours they wandered the dunes and in the heat they explored the canyons finding fresh water and strange purple flower growing out of the rock. He felt young again. He would remember those day often and smile.

* * *

The sun was setting in brilliant hues of colors he'd not seen since Irikah's body returned to the sea. Shepard had ordered the ship to Kahje as quickly as possible when his breath came shorter by they hour. He would die in the closest thing he'd ever had to a home. The place where he'd had a family. His body would join Irikah's at the bottom of the Encompassing.

Sonya knelt next to him as he lay in the grasses he'd played in as a child wearing traditional drell robes instead of his leathers. She held his hand and valiantly held back the tears that must have built up a great pain in her throat, for she swallowed often. When her eyes flicked up to the top of the hill above him and returned wetter than they had been he knew who it was that was coming, for she told him with her tears and her smile. He kissed her one last time, relishing the feel of her soft, warm hands on his face and the sweetness of her mouth.

"Siha, I... love you." He told her between gasping breaths.

"I love you... Thane Krios."

Anderson had gone through great trouble and risk to smuggle Kolyat off the Citadel to attend his father's last moments. It brought a smile to Thane's face to see his son again, void of bitterness and hate as he knelt on the other side of him.

"Father." Kolyat breathed the tittle for the first time since his childhood.

"Son..I..."

"I know. I'm sorry for... everything."

Kolyat took his father's hand. Thane squeezed it, weakly, but it was the best he could manage. The hues of dusk set in, reminding him of a pair of eyes he longed to see. Each of his hands was filled by those he loved Thane's last struggling, aching breath entered his body filled the shallow spaces in his lungs not filled with fluid and exited for the final time. His lungs expanded to draw in more air, but there was to space to fill. His chest heaved and his body tried to cough and gasp. The pain that his body felt threatened to steal away the peace of his mind, but he had long prepared for this night and he was not alone. Squeezing the hands that held his, he gazed up with watery eyes at the faces of those who loved him. Then his body quieted it's struggle and a smile touched his lips as he closed his eyes. His conscious was clear and his soul was freed of it's confines becoming as the air.

Sonya's tears ran silently down her cheeks. Quiet sobs shuddered through her. Such sorrow filled her that she felt her own breath lacking in it's coming. She could hardly stand to watch him suffer, but her own meditations had helped to prepare her. Though not as well as she'd hoped. She moved aside as Kolyat began to dress and wrap the remains of his father in preparation for the ritual. His own tears fell from his black eyes as the sun's light was lost. When the glowing hanar lifted him up and carried him in procession down to the waters edge, Sonya stood beside Kolyat in Alliance Military fashion due a civilian who has died in battle for the cause. She could think of no hight honor she could show him. So she held the stance, arms ridged at her sides, back strait and heels together as the hanar sang a familiar tune, 'like bells'.

"...the fire had gone to be kindled anew..."

It became increasingly difficult for her to keep herself from collapsing to the ground when Kolyat's sobs broke through the lump in his throat and became audible. She broke her stance to risk an arm around his shoulders. It had to be harder for him than it was for her. She felt it was what Thane would have wanted.

Kolyat resisted at first. She was not his mother, or family. She wasn't even drell. She was his father's alien lover. But she was also the Siha who had saved him from prison or worse by a hard punch and a tender heart. This time her touch was gentle and sincere, her heart no less tender. He felt the warmth of her love that his father must have felt in his last days. She had made him happy. It was because of her and Anderson that he was even here to see his father join his mother in the depths. So he lowered the barrier he'd set up to keep her out and curled into her, letting her hold him as he in turn held her.

* * *

"Let me come with you! There's nothing on the Citadel for me! Baily goes easy on me, but I've still got years ahead of me under his boot."

"Kolyat, you know I can't do that. I'm sorry. Besides, you're safer there away from Cerberus. Please."

"Okay, Sonya."

He had no rank or need to call her by her formal address.

"I'll go back. But when my time is done I would like to serve you aboard the Normandy as my father did..." His dark eyes gave her a once over, "Well not _exactly_ like my father did, but you get what I'm saying."

"Yes, I do." Shepard responded with a bit of color coming into her cheeks.

Garrus did his best to stifle a chucked and a grin and failed. Shepard shot him a look and he left the room. She then returned her attention to Kolyat. His eyes were like his fathers, but the irises were bluer. He was taller and more slender of build though the shoulder. She did not like his lips as well. They must have been his mother's.

"We'll see when the time comes, okay?"

Kolyat nodded and returned to Life Support where his father had spent so much time. Sonya had only dared to enter the room once since Thane's death a few days ago. It had been one of the hardest things she'd ever done. She kept the cup. It was the only thing not divided out in Thane's will. His leathers went to his son, as well as his guns with a note that he hoped he would never have need of them. The circlet remained within the family. She remembered feeling strange about seeing him without it, though at the time the feeling was muted by her sorrow. He had left her one thing. A holo of him. The image played out with him standing alone and somber, then smiling as she came into view. He takes her in his arms and kisses her. She remember making the holo. She also remembered the love making that had followed. It was before the condition had worsened to a more debilitating state.

Sonya set the holo on her bed side table that night. As she passed her personal console she noticed a new message. It was from Thane. Her heart stopped beating. No. He was dead. She watched him die. Was this someone's bad idea of a joke? She would kill Moreau is he was behind this. She clicked the message with a calloused heart, ready to deal out justice to the jester. But what she saw glowing orange on the display was not a joke. It was a letter from Thane, just as it promised, written by her love to be read post mortem. She sat down to avoid falling to the floor as she read.

Siha,

I write this with a heavy hand, knowing you will read this letter when I am no longer able to share my thoughts. I am dying, Siha. Perhaps because of the differences between our species, I can hope that time will treat you with kindness and dim the hurt of my passing to faded recollections that a drell would forever remember with perfect clarity. Selfishly, however, I could not leave this world without leaving a piece of me behind that would never fade.

I once accepted my fate. Nothing remained but a shell destined to die. I only had to choose the when and how of my passing. I had refused to be confined to a bed, gasping horribly as my life beeped away to machinery I had no use for. I thought of my Irikah, broken, bloodied, and betrayed by my absence. Of Kolyat, small and afraid, bravely pushing at his eyes to stem the flow of tears I had entrusted him to cry... for both our sakes.

The expectation to move swiftly to my end vanished upon uniting with your cause. You awoke me, Shepard. My heart quickened its sluggish beat if only to remain at your side and protect you with everything that I am. I was content to simply watch, take the time left given and praise all I know for allowing me to walk my final days with hope and certainty that I am worthy of more than my cold isolation, solely because you believed.

I love you. If all else whispers back into the tide, know this for fact; by grace given me by the Goddess Arashu, I bid her divine protection to you, my warrior-angel, my Siha, to succeed in your destiny. To light your path through the coming darkness. To give you hope, when all seems lost.

I will await you across the sea.

Thane

The salty stain of tears marred the desk top that night, and the next, and many more. Her pillows were wet, even in the morning, as she woke to miss his warmth next to her. Eventually time heals all wounds, but it is a poor salve and does not prevent a scar.

* * *

Sonya mourned Thane. Knowing his death was coming had allowed her to prepare for it, but not as well as she thought. She loved him dearly, though they had spent only a year together. She and Nihlus had spent nearly twice that. Not counting the time she was dead. Now they were both gone and the sorrow she carried for Nihlus amplified her suffering heart for Thane.

The shuttled that had been arranged to sneak Kolyat back onto the Citadel arrived, piloted by Baily himself. The man had turned out to be more than she expected from a C-Sec officer. She was only too glad to have him on her side, or at least on Kolyat's.

The drell had given her a final hug before leaving. It touched her that he felt he could be open and close with her.


	60. Three Years

Another year and still no progress with Nihlus. Sonya was beginning to give up hope. But she was never completely alone. Joker was still her pilot. Jacob remained on her crew, as did Kelly. Tali stayed, despite the protests from the flotilla. They couldn't do anything about it as long as she wasn't hurting the flotilla. Eventually they tolerated it in silence. Legion returned to the geth. Grunt to Tuchanka, but never for very long before joining up with a merc gang just to find them again. Chakwas stayed for Commander, now Captain in Cerberus ranks, Shepard, and finally got her brandy. She shared it with the Captain and they reminisced about old times. Mordin returned home to die of old age. Jack vanished on a mission and never returned or sent a word. And Garrus, as always, was there if she needed him.

Over the next year they would begin to hear rumors of whole planets going silent on the outer edges of the Terminus Systems. Everyone on the Normandy knew it was the Reapers. The Illusive Man had been very tight lipped about anything found on the Collector base, even after the attacks. Shepard was growing tired of his games, as was Garrus. But there was little they could do about it. Messages from Miranda provided less and less hope of why the Lazarus techniques were ineffective on Nihlus. More and more Sonya turned to Garrus for support and a shoulder when the bad news kept coming and hope dwindled. Then she began to love him. She'd always loved him, but as Van Gogh once said, the aspect of her love was changing. Then came the day when she decided to confess to him why she had been acting strangely, avoiding him and behaving oddly when he was around her.

* * *

The doors to the forward batteries hissed open. Garrus turned to see his old friend in the open door way once again. She was still young, but not as vibrant as she had once been. Neither was he. Working for Cerberus wasn't all that much fun.

"Shepard, need me for something?" He asked his traditional question.

He'd thought about programming the com to play the greeting whenever Shepard walked through the door so he wouldn't have to and thought better of it.

"Got a minute?" She answered with another question.

"Sure," He shrugged. "Just killin' time anyway."

Sonya took a seat on what she'd come to call 'her crate'. The way she looked up at him made him nervous. She had been doing that more lately, making him nervous. He fidgeted a little, trying to think of something to say. Shepard beat him to it.

"Miranda sent me another message."

"Oh? Good news?" He said, hopefully.

"No. I"m afraid not. They can't figure out what that bitch asari did to him. I hope she's rotting in some hell hole worse than Omega."

"Shep... Sonya, I'm sorry."

He changed her name, due to her request that he refer to her casually when in private. They'd been friends for too long for him to continue calling her by her last name. He'd been saying 'sorry' a lot too. Ever since the first message of no progress.

"I know. You don't need to be though. I'm getting used to the idea that he's never coming back. Maybe I made a mistake. Maybe Thane was right. I'm becoming what I hunted and now it's too late. Reapers are creeping in and no one can stop them. Not even Cerberus with their oh so coveted base."

"Sonya, you can't blame yourself. "

"I _can_." She said defiantly teasing him.

"_Okay_, you_ shouldn't_. Look, I know this is hard,but..."

"That's not what I came down here to talk to you about." She cut him off. "Not exactly."

She sighed the stood up to lean against the rail.

"We've been through a lot together. You're my best friend. So, I understand if you don't want to risk loosing that."

"What are you talking about?" Garrus asked taking a step toward her.

"A girl gets lonely after a couple years of being cold in her bed. I thought maybe..." It was her turn to fidget. "Well, you say all the time if I ever need you for anything and... uh, what are friends for? Right? I mean if you can't..." She broke off to mentally kick herself.

"Spirits, this isn't going as well as I hoped." She sighed and averted her eyes.

"Oh, I didn't... hummm."

Garrus eyed the Captain for a few seconds before answering. She was lovely as far as his knowledge of human beauty went. And she had one hell of a spirit, especially in battle. He could see why Nihlus loved her. But he'd never thought of her that way. She was his best friend, family. And in that way he loved her, but she was human! That was okay for Nihlus, if he didn't mind that. but the thought of sexual attraction or cross species intimacy with her or any other had simply not crossed him mind. At least not seriously. It had been a passing phase when he realized she and Nihlus were together. That was as far as it went. He wasn't sure he could do for her what he was pretty sure she was suggesting. With little else in his arsenal, he did the only thing he knew to do; make a cleaver joke.

"I never knew you had a thing for men with scars." He said, flaunting his fringe and his battle wounds.

"I'm not asking for our relationship to change. I don't expect you to bond yourself to me or anything. Just a mutual comfort when one of us needs a little more than a hug or a big explosion."

"I don't know, Sonya. What if they're successful with Nihlus? Why not someone a little closer to home? You might try your own species once in a while."

Sonya left the rail and took a step toward him. He took a step back.

"The Reapers could find us tomorrow. Then none of that will matter."

She had a point. And there had been that spark between them what seemed like eons ago... Maybe it could work. Like she said, it wasn't like they were going to claim each other for life or anything... He looked into her deep eyes. Eyes that he'd looked at a thousand time or more and never really noticed how much depth was really in them. She would still be his best friend. He could still love her the same way. It wound't change anything. They were just... relieving stress and offering comfort. That's what friends do for each other. In a way it was part of his oath to take care of her. She had a need and she was asking him to fill it.

"I've never considered cross species intercourse... not seriously. And... damn, saying it that way dosn't help. Now I feel dirty and clinical. Are we crazy to even be thinking about this? I'm not su... " His tone started to waver. He'd never been more afraid of a conversation."

"It's okay. Garrus, if your not comfortable with this it's okay. I'm not trying to pressure you." She apologized and backed away.

"Sonya, you're about the only friend I've got left in this screwed-up galaxy. I'm not gonna pretend I've got a fetish for humans, but this isn't about that. This is about us. You don't ever have to worry about making me uncomfortable. Nervous, yes, but never uncomfortable. So... yeah! Why the hell not.?" He relented. "There's no one in this galaxy I respect more than you, and if we can figure out a way to make it work then... Yeah. Defiantly. It'll either be a night to treasure or a whole interspecies awkwardness thing. In which case fighting the Reapers will be a welcome distraction. So, you know, a win either way."

Sonya smiled but stayed where she was. Garrus decided to convince her he was okay and casually closed the space between them.

"If you were a turian I'd be complimenting your waist or your fringe. So... you're, uh, hair looks..."

He examined the loose tresses of near white strands of gold. He'd never touched human hair. But he wanted to touch hers.

"Good and your waist is very..."

He slipped his long fingers around her mid section and found it stronger and harder than he expected for lacking any plates.

".. supportive. Hopefully that's not offensive in human culture."

"I have to admit that you're the first to use that line" She teased and smiled at him "You should stop worrying. I don't expect you to woo me."

"I just..." His mandibles flexed nervously. "I've seen so many things go wrong, Sonya. My work at C-Sec, what happened with Sidonis..."

He didn't want to mention what put them in their current predicament.

"I want something to go right. Just once. Just..."

Her hands slipped up over his chest and caressed the skin along the sides of his neck. He leaned his face toward hers. Her lips pressed against his mouth. Unlike the brief kiss in the cargo hold, he could feel the softness and warmth of them. The were smooth and a little moist. It make him wish he could reciprocate her actions. He wondered how Nihlus did it, or if the Spectre had dealt with the frustration in order to be with her. He let one hand leave her waist to slip into her hair. It was also softer and smoother than he thought it would be, silky even. He liked it more than he liked the kiss. Latter when he learned that his talons in her hair gave her some measure of pleasure, he liked it even more and would often run his fingers through whenever he could. For the moment he was quickly being introduced to human anatomy. She found room on his cot he didn't know was there. Her naked form stretched out open and waiting for him in the place he slept was the only encouragement he needed. It wasn't a tie breaker. It was a win by a light year. Her body was so unlike a turian female's. Softer but just as strong, though delicate and easily scratched by his chest spur and claws. Her wetness and tightness roused him. Her moans goaded him onward with his cautious thrusts. He knew she could handle it, loved it even, but that didn't keep him from worrying about hurting her. Eventually the pleasure that moved through him in hot waves of ecstacy won over his over calculated tenderness and he relished her as she quivered and moaned beneath him. His own purrs soon joined the chorus. When they had each reached their peek they shared in the orgasm. It was the first time he'd released inside his lover. Seeing her face as she climaxed at his urging, feeling her tighten around him and hearing her moan his name... something changed. He didn't want to be just friends with benefits. But what if it did't work out after that? Those are words one can't take back. So he didn't say them and simply held her in the afterglow as he receded out of her and into himself for the first time.

* * *

Many more nights would be spend with her in his arms, but he never brought up his change in the aspect of his love for her, though he decided she knew after the first few times felt more like making love than friends having sex. Eventually he moved up to her quarters. It wasn't a surprise or even notably marked by the crew. Her taste for aliens was notorious considering she worked for Cerberus. The Illusive Man didn't care as long as it didn't interfere with her duties, and she made sure it didn't. So the crew that minded did there best to ignore it. The arrangement worked well into the following year until the day when the message came from Miranda with unusually good news.

* * *

**sequel to come will be entitled _Enduring Love_**


End file.
